I'm waiting on someone
GeneraI
All your base are belong to us.
Often when I'm at the club and not there to see anyone in particular I'll sit and chat with the first girl that comes up to me, sometimes I turn them away if they are totally not my type, but usually before I get a few beers in me, I'm open to some conversation with anyone young and pretty. That initial conversation typically leads to me buying them a drink and more often than not, some dances, as kind of a thanks for spending 20 minutes on me. So without really playing the field I can easily spend $50 or more on the first girl.
Last night I found myself waiting on a girl for a few songs, and it was a pretty busy night, lots of ladies and PL's. But while I was waiting, I was approached by girl after girl after girl. I told them all I was waiting on someone else and all of them excused themselves right away. One girl even thanked me for letting her know, so she didn't "waste your time" though obviously she meant so she didn't waste her time. It felt like a nicer way to turn them away than the no thank you, or not right now, or the numerous other things I've said when I'm not interested.
I've had some no thank you's turn into the girl doubling down and asking why not, and now I need to have this whole conversation on why I don't like chicks with face tattoos and c-section scars, which I typically try to avoid.
Last night I found myself waiting on a girl for a few songs, and it was a pretty busy night, lots of ladies and PL's. But while I was waiting, I was approached by girl after girl after girl. I told them all I was waiting on someone else and all of them excused themselves right away. One girl even thanked me for letting her know, so she didn't "waste your time" though obviously she meant so she didn't waste her time. It felt like a nicer way to turn them away than the no thank you, or not right now, or the numerous other things I've said when I'm not interested.
I've had some no thank you's turn into the girl doubling down and asking why not, and now I need to have this whole conversation on why I don't like chicks with face tattoos and c-section scars, which I typically try to avoid.
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24 comments
Damn you're picky
But the "waiting on someone" line is pretty-common and dancers know many custies use-it as a way to say they are not interested - most dancers will either believe you are really waiting on someone or assume and accept you are saying that b/c you are not interested - but some hardcore hustlers will still double-down on the "I'm waiting for someone" line and sometimes tell you "oh yeah who; I'll go get her for you", to kinda put the PL on the spot who's not really waiting on anyone in particular.
There *have* been some girls who think those are brush off lines even so, but on occasion someone will ask to stay until the one for whom I’m waiting shows up, or who actually comes back later. I’m ok with both of those types.
I have seldom been driven to explain exactly why I’m unlikely to be interested in talking to a girl who’s twice even my size, or who’s face looks like an overdone allergy prick test, so “no thanks” is my most used “go away” remark.
The "I'm waiting on someone" doesn't have to be a lie. It's a truth, without all the background info. By that I mean "waiting on someone" can mean a favorite, another dancer, or it could mean a different type, eg someone shorter/blonder/skinnier etc or more likely, someone hotter.
I'm exactly the same way -- I use those lines if and only if I'm actually waiting for someone, and/or I really may change my mind later. Otherwise, I say "no thanks, thank you anyway" type of thing. Partially, I actually have found in the clubs I go to, a direct and clear "no thanks" is *less* likely to generate the post-refusal interrogation ("why not?" "who are you waiting for?" "am I not your type?" "C;mon, let me take you on a tour" etc). But in some ways, that doesn't matter -- I do not let the girls interrogate me on my reasons (I discussed how I handle it in an article from way back). They don't get to ask me questions about why I made the decision I did, and I'm certainly not going to be led like a little bitch into answering whatever they want. So whatever I answer, "no thanks" "waiting on someone" etc, don't just play along with the post-refusal interrogation
In case it's a longstanding CF, I might say who, but usually it seems like she's looking for an opening to try to sabotage things with the one I'm waiting on. Also, having another dancer approach for you is not selecting the one you want to be waking up mornings with and approaching her yourself like how san_jose_guy says to do.
Rarely, very rarely, has a stripper ever tried to keep trying to wear me down after that. But I literally am done talking at that point. I haven’t been rude but also haven’t invited follow up dialogue when I don’t want it. Subramans article on this was spot on in my opinion.
I'm the same way. I'm more likely to say no thanks even if I am waiting than say I'm waiting if I mean no. I tend to be a bit flexible or accommodating or whatever to followups, at least if they do it in a playful way or are at least kinda cute. The leash is always pretty short though. I'm not gonna spend 10 minutes justifying myself to a stripper I have interest in. If they're not playful I've got no problem ending the conversation with a no.
There are dancers who might brush off the No, thanks answer - and continue to push dances - but that’s when I’m firm “No. thank you for the offer.”
The buy me a drink line is usually a last ditch effort to squeeze a few dollars out of a customer. My response will remain “No. Thank you for the offer, but I’m not interested.”
Hopefully the dancers will get the message with my initial reply. Sadly, some are like telemarketers reading off of a script - and I’m sure their services are most likely mechanical.
BTW. I didn't read any of the posts so I hope my response is on point.
Not totally related but I had a girl grab my and and try pulling me out of my chair one night a few months back after I said no thanks, she kept on and on, come on, I promise you'll have a good time. Even if she was gorgeous I probably would have said no just to protest that behavior. Well...maybe if she was gorgeous the lieutenant would have made the final decision.
"I don't want her to think I'm sitting with someone else"
The straight up "No thanks" works pretty well, too. I generally explain "waiting for someone" if I might want the company of the one asking sometime in the future, so "maybe another night" could be another option.
For the other 20% who say some variation of "why not?" I tell them more directly that I'm not interested in a dance at the moment, which sends most 19 or the remaining 20% on their way.
The last 1% of dancers were going to be aggressive no matter what you or I or anyone else says. They get "you're not my type" or, if I'm getting mildly annoyed, "I don't like you" - also firmly delivered but without the smile. That usually ends it, though sometimes they get snippy on the way out. I forget them about 3 seconds after they walk away, so I don't really care.
You guys who make up lies or are otherwise too afraid of offending a girl can be your own worst enemies. There are girls who, knowing that you are lying and/or trying to avoid discomfort, will tie you up in the hopes of wearing you down. I have no interest in being tied up with a girl that I am not interested in for a second longer than necessary and I don't care about her feelings, so I am direct and being this way has immeasurably improved my clubbing time over the years.