To Re-Invent
san_jose_guy
money was invented for handing to women, but buying dances is a chump's game
I would have posted this on an older thread, but now they all close automatically.
I do think such re-invention is necessary. After all, you have suffered a horrible set back. No matter what you may thing of the institution of marriage. You did not enter it believing that yours would be so horrid.
So you end up having to examine everything thing in your life which brought you to that place of going along with marriage, and then to now where you stand.
I don't dislike my ex, and I really don't blame her.
And I also know that many others on this site have had horrid marriages and that their ex's really were completely impossible.
SJG
Clapton, Let It Rain
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnDSN_XK…
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SJG
Go soak your head.
SJG
Here's your theme song....
When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
You're so fuckin' special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.
I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so fuckin' special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.
She's running…
What happened really sucks, man. You didn't deserve it.
I'm pretty sure that's not true at all.
Maybe he did something that contributed. I challenge you to argue that she didn't as well.
If she had been his match, I don't think it would have turned out that way, though.
Sometimes you just have to walk away, let it go and try to heal.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDwCMxPw…
You gotta know when to hold em. Know when to fold em. Know when to walk away and know when to run.
Like be a self-absorbed, creepy-as-fuck lunatic?
I was actually thinking of a song by Beck
One woman's trash is another woman's treasure. The pairing might have brought that out in him. A different pairing could have balanced him out and soothed him.
By pairing, I assume you're referring to his meds regimen and dosages. If that's the case, then I agree.
"I was actually thinking of a song by Beck"
No doubt it's this, the creep's back up anthem....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgSPaXgA…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xk5Ki3qv…
So take your own advice when you say
"So you end up having to examine everything thing in your life which brought you to that place of going along with marriage, and then to now where you stand."
^ You say this but your own posts indicate otherwise when you start examining your own self and the specific things YOU did in retrospect. For example your wife left you because you simply cheated on her with AMP whores and you spent both of your money on it all. From what I've seen you post you find other reasons and excuses to make it look like cheating on your wife with an AMP whore was forced upon you and it was just a result of other issues beyond your control.
To this I say BULLSHIT. Face the fact that you did not uphold your own wedding vows. It was your fault and admit it without making any other excuses. If you do this sincerely and with humility, yes, you will have 'reinvented' yourself and maybe, just maybe, you can move on with yourself and your life.
Rather, it is simply that after suffering any major life loss, one has to carefully look at themselves, at all the things which led up to the loss, put them into a situation where that would happen, and then at what there real priorities are. One has to rebuild their identity, build a new identity.
My ex did all sorts of things which made life impossible. But still I do not hold this against her. Rather I see external forces as being at cause.
Anytime someone suffers a severe loss, they need to re-examine it and re-invent themselves. And unfortunately, sometimes people are unable to do this.
SJG
SJG
Anytime someone suffers a severe loss, they need to re-examine it and re-invent themselves. And unfortunately, sometimes people are unable to do this.
SJG"
^ Irony at its finest. SJG looks externally rather than INTERNALLY as to the root cause of his divorce. And then in the next paragraph he says it is unfortunate when one fails to re-examine the root cause of a loss. Pathetic irony.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFAdlU2E…
Testosterone vs. Oxytocin. We got it. We wanna give it to you
If you heard voices in your head you would never believe it was possibly of your own subconscious. When your neighbors dog starts telling you what to do I suggest you dont follow his advice.
Definitely. I saw him licking his balls the other day. I was OK until he made eye contact. Awkward!
SJG
SJG
http://www.hill-interiors.com/images/gia…
SJG
The third option is that he might actually care about you on some human level. The worst thing you can do to someone isn't hate them, it's to ignore them.
I don't see him trying to run you off the site, all I see is civil interaction.
Do people let him do this in other realms? I think not. I certainly wouldn't.
SJG
I would say this might help you, but you might already be too far gone:
http://images.toolbank.com/images/extral…
You are a troll, turning a simple thread, started about a particular topic, into a chance to dump your negative meta.
SJG
Just so you don't miss any part of the above sentence, that would be a sterile half-ass's ass.
You know that if you are fondling your peace, then that is what will happen.
I am very civil, I don't insult people until they ask for it.
SJG
To be honest - reinventing oneself isn’t always the way to go. If attempted in an effort to save ones marriage - it must be an honest long term commitment to change. If it’s done as a last ditch effort - and without true introspection - it will only prolong the inevitable.
If one attempts to reinvent oneself after a failed marriage - it can be a good thing. I say this because a reinvention can feel like a fresh start. Many folks need a boost after the pain of divorce. Some folks start going to the gym regularly. Some find a hobby - that they’ve long put off - and get deeply involved. In those respects - it can be therapeutic.
The pain of divorce requires introspection - and possibly once the introspection is complete - then changes can be undertaken. There is emotional frailty after a divorce - and rather than finding another partner immediately - the reinvention process can help one to overcome the pain (without getting tangled in a new relationship immediately).
Here, this is the earlier thread which inspired this one:
https://www.tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=…
I think TXbananas has got it right. But I also think there is more too it. No one goes into a marriage thinking it will be a disaster. Even if they don't believe in marriage, they still must think that they can make it work, that it won't turn into a death trap.
So then when it does turn into a living nightmare, once it is over and the have recuperated some, it is always necessary to re-examine and then reinvent oneself. But sometimes that is extremely hard.
SJG
Chaka Khan, 1985 Germany
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cpo0_sn…
Chaka Khan - Live At Roxy (1981)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUfEQrAp…
Night In Tunisia
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hySlWc29…
How many feel like I do that the above song is very similar to:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Tdu4uKS…
Miles Davis & Chaka Khan: Human Nature (live in Montreux 1989)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZ5E4Jo3…
Stanley Clarke Herbie Hancock & Chaka Khan Live , gotta see this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9urd9Mc5…
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/14-…
SJG
Bro-Topia
https://www.amazon.com/Brotopia-Breaking…
Devil's Bargain
https://www.amazon.com/Devils-Bargain-Ba…
https://goodmenproject.com/featured-cont…
SJG
SJG
Arnold Schönberg: Pélleas und Melisande op.5 (1903)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2SvMeye…
Support Single Moms
http://images10.newegg.com/ProductImage/…
...I am doing all of these things."
^ Are you sure? What have you examined in your past actions of seeing strippers and AMP whores and spending your wife's money that was the root cause of your divorce?
https://www.amazon.com/Path-Least-Resist…
Written by a musician - composer
SJG
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Fri…
https://www.robertfritz.com/wp/
Maybe Fritz is not aware of this. His stuff is good.
He is also close to Peter Senge.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Seng…
http://solonline.org/
SJG
So I was fighting to claim my own sexuality, you could say, and eventually would be wanting to move in the direction of much more sexualized women, like the ones I've called the "Beloved Latina Escorts".
My wife was never going to be anything at all like them. Just not in her makeup, not for this lifetime.
SJG
FILM: Rise of the Nazi Cult (Pt. 1 of 2) - A conversation with Peter Levenda
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvTJIWTz…
Mine was sexually faithful. But in otherways she was 100% disloyal.
SJG
SJG
Gertrudis, Revolutionary Army General, and becoming greater than life via the boxcar legend:
http://www.trainboard.com/railimages/dat…
Like Water For Chocolate - Gertrudis Ad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XoPiFTGl…
Working Women in the Mexican Revolution
http://latinamericanhistory.oxfordre.com…
SJG
SJG
Gnostic Mass
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENpzzIVD…