Founding a National Strip Club Chain

47 comments

• vincemichaels

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  7 years ago

  SJG will submit a 320 page resume for all the positions. :)
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  Anything over 100 words won't be considered, SJG.
• Corvus

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  7 years ago

  No one here will be interested. We'd have to give up our current jobs that already pay $350,000 annually.
• s275ironman

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  7 years ago

  If it is non-extras, such a club would fail (probably lose money) in Detroit.
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  Trucidos, you are the most qualified candidate for the Cleveland position, so it's yours. ironman, adjusting club practices to the local regulatory environment is what I'm paying you 80 grand for.
• DisRuptive1

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  7 years ago

  No Las Vegas?
• JuiceBox69

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  7 years ago

  I'm willing to be the CEO over the Bath Room Troll Sales Department. No Salary I believe I can make more training each troll to upscale smelling sauces, condiments and hand jobs :)
• JuiceBox69

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  7 years ago

  I want 100% control on the National level...100% commission
• JuiceBox69

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  7 years ago

  First quarter of projected sales with me in control of the bathroom trolls will be 3.5 billion in total gross revenue
• Hugh_G_Rection

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  7 years ago

  Wanting to run a "Clean" club in Metro Detroit ?? BWAHAHAHAHAHA Good luck with that...no wait FUCK that idea completely, we want cheap extras to flourish. Now take that worthless application and shove it up your constipated ass, a topless prophet you are not.
• joc13

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  7 years ago

  I'd apply for CEO but 210k isn't enough in NYC market. Teachers with 25yrs experience make 210k in NYC. I'd want a bonus plan based on the number of times SJG gets slapped trying to initiate a front room make out session.
• vincemichaels

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  7 years ago

  SJG is a chump.
• s275ironman

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  7 years ago

  I'd take the Detroit Club Manager position if my salary is $250k and the club is extras-friendly.
• vincemichaels

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  7 years ago

  No need for Kevlar, Trucidos, just serve them SOMA cocktails, they should be reasonably peaceful for bikers.
• HookahTime

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  7 years ago

  Agree w/ Corvus - not enough $ in the salaries, especially on coasts. Are you offering profit sharing? Options? Bonus incentives?
• jackslash

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  7 years ago

  Only $80K /yr for a Detroit manager? That's a bathroom troll salary.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  How in the hell do you expect a manager to manage people if he doesn't make at least as much as the people he is responsible to supervise ? Shit wages get shit managers.
• san_jose_guy

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  7 years ago

  Yes, twentyfive said what I was going to say. The people who really do that kind of work get much more money, as there is lots and lots of money at stake. Consider also that the salary you pay them is entirely on the books. Also Lecherous, how will you clubs be different from what we already have? You've gotta have an angle. Have you ever seen up close how talent agents run it for underground shows, and how they recruit girls and sometimes end up in conflicts with them? SJG Led Zeppelin - Stairway to Heaven (Live Earls Court 1975) [view link]
• ATACdawg

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  7 years ago

  I'll take Southeast Division Manager. I have significant experience in all types of clubs in multiple countries. Also, I will PERSONALLY ensure that all dancers hired are hot and extras friendly!
• flagooner

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  7 years ago

  @25. MLB, NBA, NFL coaches don't. Neither does the UM football coach.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  Not even close to the same thing, those pro leagues are real this is a fantasy, in more ways than one. BTW most pro level coaches especially head coaches make a ton of bucks, and the executive level folks are mostly wealthy. Ballplayers are focused on winning for the most part, managing strippers must be like herding cats.
• vincemichaels

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  7 years ago

  Hey !!! No insulting cats here !!
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  disruptive, LV is a small, oversaturated market. We cater to suburban family men, not the jet-set crowd. Juice, bathroom trolls? Really? That almost sounds as though it's a joke. You need to take this company more seriously if you expect to find employment here. Joc and everyone else bitching about the salaries, as a proud Midwesterner I don't care if $210 thousand doesn't go as far on the coasts--that's what you get for living there--and also, if tenured high school teachers really do make that much in New York (at my high school they made 70 grand), so what? Do you really think running a gentlemen's club is more difficult than teaching trig to a bunch of 17-year-olds? I don't. Trucidos, you start when the club is built. Ground breaks sometime in the next few never. ATAC, I like the cut of your jib. Hired! SJG, I made an oversight in not addressing the matter of our brand identity in the initial post. We are going to apply the chain model that has worked for so many dining and entertainment establishments: consistency, consistency, consistency (with a few tweaks here and there for different markets (read: jurisdictions)). Think of it as the Tilted Kilt, except simultaneously more upscale and sleazier. Dancers are to adhere to strict standards of (un)dress and deportment designed to make the customer feel catered to but never pressured. Opening with "Wanna dance?" will be a no-no. Our kitchens will serve more steak and wine than burgers and beer, and we'll eliminate unnecessary positions by having the dancers be servers as well. That way they can always make money somehow. "OK, I've got that down, now would you gentlemen like anything 'extra' with that? *wink wink*" Of course, none of this works without talent, so our standards will be strict and uniform in that regard. Over 35? Disqualified. Over 150 lbs.? One strike. Under a C cup? One strike. Under a 36-inch posterior? One strike. Preference will be given to the applicants with the fewest strikes, and three strikes is disqualification. Also, NO FAKE TITS (or asses)!
• san_jose_guy

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  7 years ago

  Lecherous, what you are describing sounds like Deja Vu. And as I see it, they have already done enough damage, like in San Francisco. Breastaurants are strictly legal. But strip clubs are in dicey territory. So having a nationwide name means that you can't operate as loosely as others can. Think of this so much loved Follies. Nationwide chain could never operate like that. Why don't you try and run just one strip club, see how it goes, see if you can bring anything new to it. As I see it, the best are when the girls get to do it their own way. But this does not mean that things will stay strictly legal. And as I have seen, serving food interferes with maximum mileage on several levels. Good Luck SJG John Hubner, on California Youth Authority [view link] Foster Care Group Home, Fullerton CA? [view link] Surviving A Group Home [view link] Growing Up In Groups Homes [view link]
• ppwh

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  7 years ago

  Dude, your fantasy club chain is going to suck if it runs off spinners. Also, that's funny shit that you're paying your SF club manager a cardboard box and cat food salary. I can only imagine the obnoxious homeless guy you hire trying to run a club.
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  80 THOUSAND dollars? In no universe is that not a lot of money. Also, fuck spinners; if I wanted to fuck 12-year-old boys, I'd join the priesthood. PS In my previous post, it should say that being over 150 lbs. is two strikes, not one.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Your imaginary club chain sucks. :P
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Have you tried it on the sims? You know, to see how it goes and stuff?
• ppwh

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  7 years ago

  LM, I thought you were fantasizing about running a business, not just trying to insult anyone whose preferences in women or where to live were different from your own. My bad.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  @LecherousMonk, $80k ain't shit in most of the major metro areas in this country, it might work in some small town areas but if you are in NYC, San Fran, Chicago, and many other places it will barely keep you sheltered and in groceries, you need to get out dude, its obvious you haven't traveled much.
• sharkhunter

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  7 years ago

  Sounds like age discrimination not hiring someone based on age. I personally don't mind some dancers who are over 35. No club in South Carolina? We are already down to no extras clubs. I personally like beer and hamburgers more than steak and wine. You say you aren't catering to the jet set crowd but locals and then you say mostly steak and wine. That does not sound like suburban crowds to me. I know a few may like steak and wine and I eat that on occasion but I believe beer and hamburgers are sold more often. Pizza slices also sell well in South Carolina I believe but if you want to limit the food, then that is out. How much extra are dancers going to make for delivering food, beer or wine? I believe most typical dancers will complain about having to do that instead of stripping and selling dances. I'm wondering how you would get dancers to agree to deliver food and double up as a waitress. If you are paying income to dancers to act as a waitress, doesn't that violate the independent contractor status or are you going to pay dancers a salary as employees? I could actually consider a job doing this in a less expensive cost of living location but I hiring someone works two ways. You have to sell the job and understand the job duties unless someone likes jumping in without looking. However I do have over 20 years experience visiting strip clubs. What would be in the hours of operation? Is the manager expected to work from noon until 4 or 5 am? That would be 14 or 15 hours a day.
• sharkhunter

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  7 years ago

  Actually I believe a concept in South Carolina that really draws in large crowds is byob with a nude club, hot dancers. Cover charge could be higher to make up for the lack of alcohol sales. Maybe fake beer could be sold. I've seen people buy that. Or a split club where wine is sold on one side and not on the other. Topless on one side, byob on the other.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Why doesn't anyone seem to consider what the dancer what to drink and eat? We are the biggest customers. Not only do we buy our own food and drink, but customers gladly buy it for us. Girls would purposely not eat before work, and would get customers to buy us food after work, If it was stuff we wanted. Also, dancers would order a lot more non alcoholic, or low alcohol, cool drinks. We can only drink so much booze, but we'd order other stuff, besides soda and Red Bull.
• Dominic77

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  7 years ago

  It would be nice if say juicebars actually served REAL JUICE instead of just sprite. :-) --> "Midwest Division Manager: based in Minneapolis; $120k/yr" @LecherousMonk, I am willing to relocate to the twin cities. That's twice what I make now and like @twentyfive said -->"you need to get out dude, its obvious you haven't traveled much."-->. Bingo! That describes me, too. A change of scenery for opportunity is just what I need. I have experience going to Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Fort Wayne, and Tampa clubs on and off for 21 years.
• ppwh

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  7 years ago

  ^ After telling 7-8 figures of income to go fuck itself by running off spinners, it's kind of small potatoes that he would run off maybe 5 figures of food income by having a strictly pretentious menu. ;)
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  Wasn't trying to start a flame war with this post. It was supposed to be fun. I obviously pulled the salaries out of my ass, but I still don't see how they're that far off. All but one is in six figures. Anyway, Dominic, pack your bags for the land of Garrison Kiellor! You'll obviously be expected to travel to each other club in your division once a quarter to make sure they're ship-shape. You can expense it, though.
• Dominic77

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  7 years ago

  @LecherousMonk, not a problem. I'm your man. Woo-hoo!
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Awe. I'm just sad bc I'm too old to work at your supper awesome strip club chain. :(
• warhawks

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  7 years ago

  Sounds like a dream job. Until you realize you have to put up with stripper shit EVERY day of the week...
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  ^^^SJG is going to open a competing chain of strip club churches, with all of the gravy you can eat and all of the front room friendliness you can handle. It's going to be supercalifragilsticexpialodocious
• rickdugan

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  7 years ago

  Lecherous posted: "Our kitchens will serve more steak and wine than burgers and beer, and we'll eliminate unnecessary positions by having the dancers be servers as well." So then they would be statutory employees? Bad move lecherous, because then you could be liable for sexual harassment claims. Imagine just how many girls could claim that you sexually harassed them - it would probably qualify for class action status. ;) Oh yeah, and as others here have pointed out, your salary structure sucks for the northeast and CA. Unlike you, some of us don't live in places where houses cost 200k or less, with nearly non-existent property taxes, or where people can rent a nice place for less than 1k per month. 80k is barely a livable wage in NYC after taxes, housing costs, high utility bills, etc., and even $210k for the top spot isn't a princely sum in the NYC market.
• san_jose_guy

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  7 years ago

  Lecherous, usually high mileage and food conflict. For one thing, there are the alcohol rules. In some states the skin level has to come down. But there is an even more serious issue. They usually put all other manner of restriction along with the alcohol rules, about touching, about flashing, and prostitution. The point is that they can enforce these rules simply by administrative order, not by a jury trial. Second, even when that is not in play, if you are in a competitive metro, the pressure will be there to drop all cover charges, just to keep the cook employed. But this conflicts with what the dancers do. One of our dancer members from Portland wrote about this. The place fills up with guys who don't want to spend money on the girls. All they want is their food and free groping. So the dancers are basically donating their time. They offer everything, and at very reasonable prices. But the guys who come there only want to buy food and then try to cop free feels. So dancers often end up with far less than the minimum wage. And I can show how this works locally too. Say the S.F. Crazy Horse, a jack shack, not really the maximum, but high mileage. Many say such clubs have a 'pervy vibe'. And yes they do. No food or alcohol, but a high cover charge. Guys would not go there with their co workers. But in Sunnyvale we have a long established Monday thru Friday lunch hoffbrau at the Brass Rail. Alcohol, but no cover charge. No touching, no private dances, bikini. Guys do come there with their coworkers from Lockheed. The club makes money on the food and the girls get stage tips and after stage tips from the lunch crowd. Usually its the most money they get for that entire shift. No touching. See my point, you need to better think this through. Are you intending to provide high mileage? Also, with the girls who do high mileage, you can't really expect them to do much else reliably. SJG
• ATACdawg

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  7 years ago

  @BJ99: Don't worry. As manager of the Southeast Division, I will gladly give you a pass, as long as we keep it double ultra secret from the other guy's on this thread! Seriously, three of my favorite dancers have been 42 to 46 and we're just totally sexy!
• ppwh

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  7 years ago

  Wtf is up with this chain! I went to one of their clubs in the Southeast and I saw a spinner and a 35 year-old dancer, and they even had some of those bison burgers on the menu instead of steak and no BJs! On top of that, after bribing the manager who looked hard-up for cash so I could hook up with a dancer in the owner's office, there wasn't even a bathroom troll to spray my cock down with Listermint.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Oh thank you, atacdawg ;) I appreciate that.
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  Ppwh, we hear your concerns, and we take them very seriously.
• LecherousMonk

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  7 years ago

  Also, bj, you are welcome to manage. There is no glass ceiling in this organization. If you prefer, something closer to the action there is always house mom.