The true profession of some tuscl members

JohnSmith69
layin low but staying high

Based upon their posts and personalities, here are my guesses as to the true professions of some tuscl members.

Motörhead -- Standup comedian

Shadowcat -- Gynecologist

SJGuy -- quality control inspector for McCormick gravy mixes

SJGay -- bath house attendant

John Smith -- high school girls guidance counselor

Gawker -- drug rehab therapist

Rick Dugan -- garbage collector

Jackslash -- college professor

Skibum -- used car salesman

Shailynn -- psychologist

4got -- kennel operator

Juice -- Drive thru cashier at a KFC

Founder -- strip club owner

Emily -- Vegas show girl

Rech -- marijuana farmer

Papi -- hostage negotiator

Random Member -- serial rapist

Does anyone want to admit that I'm right?

95 comments

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NinaBambina
8 years ago
I wouldn't doubt Founder owns, or has previously owned, a strip club or two. But what do I know.
rockstar666
8 years ago
John, you guessed yourself? I know you said you're an attorney but I'd say you specialize in divorces. What about me?
shadowcat
8 years ago
I'm not a Gynecologist but I will take a look. At least that is what my t-shirt says. :)
RandomMember
8 years ago
LOL!

@Smith, who openly admits to to ephebophilia, talks about fucking 69-yr-old Hillary while hurling insults, face-fucking teenage girls, BB fucking multiple teenagers BB, calling me a serial rapist. Try for something more creative, next time, dipshit.

IRL, I probably have an enormous amount in common with Lopaw -- and I'm not even a lesbian.
Hugh_G_Rection
8 years ago
^^^ Speaking of Lopaw, I'd love to see a club where the owner had the sense to offer her a job as house mom. Bet those girls would walk around with smiles on their faces...... and happy dancers make for happier customers.

Stand up Comedian. Tough Gig- I went to the unemployment once and asked about a comedy gig, they told me not to quit my day job!
(that would deserve a rimshot but I'd rather not do something to make 4got2wipe happy)
Tiburon
8 years ago
I don't see my name up there
Clubber
8 years ago
Happy I wasn't noted, since he might remember! Or maybe Hech clouded his memory.
ime
8 years ago
I didn't make the list either
JohnSmith69
8 years ago
There's a limit to my creativity. You guys need to come up with professions for the ones I omitted.
vincemichaels
8 years ago
vincemichaels, serial Miller Light drinker.
RandomMember
8 years ago
^^^okay

JohnSmith -- Founder, National Organization for Women.
JuiceBox69
8 years ago
I'm actually the cook at KFC not the cashier.
shailynn
8 years ago
Love it, and most are pretty accurate.

Juice got kicked off the drive thru window because every 6 piece renders order only had 5 by the time Juice passed it to the customer.

LoPaw - real estate agent

Rockstar - supervisor of the PBS fundraising department

ime, dominic, sinclair - quality food control team for Chipotle

Nina - shah of the sunset cast member
NinaBambina
8 years ago
I'm not Iranian.
JuiceBox69
8 years ago
LMFAO
ime
8 years ago
Gawker -life coach

Skibum - old man yellling at cloud

Shadowcat - senator

Papi chulo - exotic animal breeder

Shailynn - transgender stylist

Sjguy - tinfoil hat salesman

Juice - bovine artificial insemination intern

ime
8 years ago
Crazy joe - fertilizer quality tester
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Juice- fertilizer spreader on his chacken fangers.
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
JohnSmith - high school girl's swim-team coach
gammanu95
8 years ago
Bullshit, Juice, you never passed the fry station.
skibum609
8 years ago
I have been a divorce lawyer for 34 years and as a result no one posting here is a stranger to me.
mikeya02
8 years ago
Papi- Minister of Information

Motorhead- joke writer for various late night TV hosts
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Hi skibum609, pleasure meeting you sir. I'd like you to represent me and 846,542 women friends of mine sueing the Donald for sexual misbehavior to women. :)
JuiceBox69
8 years ago
LMFAO
georgebailey
8 years ago
Good thread
impala
8 years ago
Don't know if I'm honored or insulted that I'm not on the list
rickdugan
8 years ago
"Rick Dugan -- garbage collector"

I sell valuables that people throw away in order to fund my strip club trips. ;)
flagooner
8 years ago
LarryFisherprice - paperboy
flagooner
8 years ago
Sjguy - tinfoil hat salesman

Classic
flagooner
8 years ago
Nina - whore
mikeya02
8 years ago
lol
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
mikeya - SWAT officer
mikeya02
8 years ago
lol
Bavarian
8 years ago
4got2wipe - Proctologist
Juice - Professional troll
JS69 - Erotica writer - 69 Shades of Grey
Gawker - Addiction medicine specialist
Jackslash - Chef
LDK82 - Product development at Liquid Lapdance
Papi - Strip club consultant
mikeya02
8 years ago
Papi - International Man of Mystery
JohnSmith69
8 years ago
Actually I would like being the high school girls swim team coach better than guidance counselor. But don't worry, I would never go into the locker room. I just enjoy swimming.
RandomMember
8 years ago
"Random Member -- serial rapist"
-------------------------------------------------------
You know @Johnny, as I recall it was *you* who wrote an entire essay about fucking a young dancer to tears in the VIP. To my way of thinking, that sounds more like rape than anything I've posted.

And all this inappropriate anger after the kindness and charitable advice I've given you throughout the course of your horrible midlife crisis. If it makes you feel better, divorcing your wife and falling in love with a teenage sex worker (who sucks your dick the first night) is something we all go through. Think of the $60K-per-year allowance/trip/shopping budget for your exorbitant sugar baby as money that you would have blown on therapy, anyway.

Just remember-- I'm there for you buddy.
gawker
8 years ago
As a drug rehab counselor it's important that I experience each of thedamned mood altering drugs. In reality I've learned a hell of a lot about the drug rehab industry from my ATF. She's been in and out of detox and rehab so often it makes my head spin.
I've read that in the USA this is a $34 billion industry annually.
jackslash
8 years ago
Jackslash--professional lasagna maker for strippers.
shailynn
8 years ago
Jackslash - daycare center cook.

Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
jackslash, stripper daycare operator, where strippers are allowed alternate forms of payment
Dominic77
8 years ago
Skibum609 --> "I have been a divorce lawyer for 34 years and as a result no one posting here is a stranger to me." -->

^^^ Just think for a minute. If we allow gay marriage, it should effectively double your business! Well not literally, but you get my drift. ;)
gammanu95
8 years ago
Papa Chulo - writes technical manuals for home theater equipment

JS69 - hypnotist

Mikey- RNC staff speech writer

Clubber - Harley mechanic

shadowcat - ED medicine tester

Rech- Eddie Murphy impersonator

SJGay- MAMP sign flipper
Clubber
8 years ago
gamman,

You sort of got close. I do that. but only on my bike and not as a profession.

However, what I did do often was dealing with mechanics as well as computers.
rickdugan
8 years ago
Random may have some competition from SJGuy for the title of "serial rapist." It was only a little over a year ago that he was talking about holding girls' wrists and starting to fuck them before they could wake up.

A little memory jog:
https://www.tuscl.net/postread.php?PID=3…
gammanu95
8 years ago
I was wondering if I got the idea for clubber to be a Harley mechanic as a subconcious inference from one of his earlier posts. Too close to be funny.
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Clubber, hurricane repairman
Clubber
8 years ago
vm,

Come on, you know what I DID.

Getting ready to retire for the 3rd or 4th time next Thursday!
ATACdawg
8 years ago
ATACdawg - gainfully and happily unemployed!
Clubber
8 years ago
ATAC,

I'll rejoin you in the skill next week. :)

But I wonder how long it will be before I find something to do that makes that stop.
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Retirement is often a good thing, Clubber, I know what Andrew did to you. i didn't mean to bust your chops.
Clubber
8 years ago
vm,

andrew was mostly just an inconvenience to me, personally. Being prepared makes all the difference. Now had I been in a place that came apart, I might feel differently, but that is still being prepared.
rockstar666
8 years ago
Clubber: Towel boy cover while spying for Control in a Chinese brothel

Mikeya02: In charge of devising torture for Kaos agents

Shadowcat: "Chief" at Control headquarters; in chareg of all oprations

SJGay: Head recruiter at Control for new agents

SJGuy: Head of propaganda at Control

John69: In charge of chemical warfare at Control

Nina: Femme Fatal to elicit secrets fro Kaos agents

Poledancer: In charge of internal security at Control

Juice: Head of propaganda at Control

Lapdance king: In charge of chemical warfare at Control

Rickdugan: Assistant to Juice.

OSUGuy: Master of disguises for covert oerations

Dougster: Top agent for the really tough cases

Me: Master puppeteer



rockstar666
8 years ago
Sorry have 2 heads of propaganda....one will have to be an assistant!
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
shadowcat - Follies head quality-control engineer
ATACdawg
8 years ago
"SJGay: Head recruiter at Control for new agents"

That does it. I'm signing on with KAOS!
mikeya02
8 years ago
VinceMichael....top assassin for Control
vincemichaels
8 years ago
I have no comment. KAOS, what's that ?
LOL
mikeya02
8 years ago
Remember Get Smart?
Clubber
8 years ago
rock,

If someone were to offer me that job, I'm IN!
twentyfive
8 years ago
I am FBI female body inspector.
Clubber
8 years ago
25,

Better to be an inserter? :)
twentyfive
8 years ago
^^^Only after inspecting do you insert.......;)
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Hell yeah, got to be sure it ain't Juice in drag. :(
Dougster
8 years ago
rickdugan is definitely a used cars salesman
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
I want to be the Evil Overlord.

SJG
JimGassagain
8 years ago
I'm an auto-repair mechanic.
georgmicrodong
8 years ago
I'm a model for super sized dildos.
Clubber
8 years ago
25,

True enough.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
I'm an authority on Average Americans, and I do advertisements for Chrysler

SJG

Isaac Hayes: Shaft
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFvRvSxs…
Jascoi
8 years ago
maybe i'm joe sixpack.
ime
8 years ago
Sanjoseguy has a part time job as a jizz mopper at the local bath house.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
^^^^^^^ Then you probably have not been employed in decades.

:)

SJG
Mate27
8 years ago
WTF does that comeback say about you SJG? Are you taking up all of the jizz mopping jobs? Lol!
Mate27
8 years ago
WTF does that comeback say about you SJG? Are you taking up all of the jizz mopping jobs? Lol!
ime
8 years ago
To sjg its more of a passion than a job, he would do it for free.
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
Dougster - motivational speaker
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
^^^^^^^ impossible, way too mean spirited and elitist.

SJG
vincemichaels
8 years ago
vincemichaels, serial "Would you do her, thread poster"
larryfisherman
8 years ago
Haha yes Vince, that used to be me, but you have taken the lead :)
ATACdawg
8 years ago
" ^^^^^^^ impossible, way too mean spirited and elitist."

Shoot, SJC, have you ever heard a motivational speaker? Why would somebody who doesn't feel like he's smarter and ruthless enough to charge for spewing drivel want to do that job.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
ATACdawg, you're right on about motivational speakers. But Dougster has far bigger plans. He is working to bring about Ray Kurzweil's Singularity. That's when The Übermensch will be born, and when the human race formally splits in two. He and his Master Class will ascend into their high rises. Each with a strip club on the top floor of course.

And then for the rest of us, we are to be placed under task masters equipped with whips, and assigned to things like cleaning the sidewalk with our tooth brushes.

Dougster was just over in Bayreuth, listening to some Wagner with his friends, and finalizing all of the details of their plan.

SJG

Zarathustra
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-LbTUvf…
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
He doesn't come across as likely Jewish to me. Jew's don't dabble in the territory he is in. They know better than that.

SJG

Amy Winehouse - Love Is A Losing Game
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMO5Ko_7…
Mate27
8 years ago
I can believe Dougster as being Jewish. After I was pinning Rickyboy as a possible Jew in a thread a couple years back, Dougster quickly denounced Rickyboy as one of his kind. Makes you shed a tear for a moment thinking how honorable one can be.

SJG is still the dumbest dilusional character on TUSCL.
ime
8 years ago
SJG is a total ass faggit
twentyfive
8 years ago
I am trying to figure out how being Jewish became part of this thread, i f you don't like Jews here is a bunch of products for you to boycott so as to show your displeasure. Let me warn you in advance, you won't feel so good.


Giulio Meotti
The writer, an Italian journalist with Il Foglio, writes a twice-weekly column for Arutz Sheva. He is the author of the book "A New Shoah", that researched the personal stories of Israel's terror victims, published by Encounter and of "J'Accuse: the Vatican Against Israel" published by Mantua Books.. His writing has appeared in publications, such as the Wall Street Journal, Frontpage and Commentary.
More from the author ►

Boycott the Jews? You will die
Truth is the best disenfectant.
The boycott threat is endangering the Jewish people. Universities, pension funds, commercial chains, newspapers: there is an anti-Semitic offensive around the world.
Let's see what would happen if the anti-Semites would really boycott "everything Jewish", as Ayatollah Khamenei said.
If you contracted syphilis, you could not be cured by salvarsan since it was discovered by a Jew, Paul Ehrlich.
If you contracted gonorrhea, you could not seek diagnosis, because the method is named after a Jew, Albert Neissner.
If you had heart disease you could not use Digitalis, because it was discovered by a Jew, Ludwig Traube.
A toothache? No, because Novocaine was discovered by two Jews, Widal and Weil.
Diabetes? You will die soon because Insulin is the result of research by a Jew, Oskar Minkowsky.
You cannot get the anti polio vaccine, because it bears a Jew's name, Jonas Salk.
You must also die of Tuberculosis because a Jew, Zalman Waxman, invented the drug for it.
No hope for cancer because one of the most important tumor suppressor genes was cloned by scientists at the Weizmann Institute in Rehovot (defective copies of this gene are found in more than half of all human cancers).
No chance to be saved from the "Mad Cow" disease, because Israel developed the diagnosis in Creutzfeldt Jakob genetic disease in humans with a urine test instead of a brain biopsy.
Did you get the West Nile virus? Forget the Israeli vaccine.
Forget chemotherapy that extends the lives of cancer patients, kidney dialysis machines, cardiac pacemakers or Hepatitis B vaccine.
The Muslim fanatics and their Western anti-Semitic friends can only dream of having a tiny fraction of the brain power of these Jewish scholars.
And I say it to a genius like Stephen Hawking as well, who approved the boycott of the Jewish State. Maybe he is alive because of Israeli technology. The same for Mahmoud Abbas' wife, who has just visited an Israeli hospital. Such hypocrisy.
How many Nobel prizes have the Muslims collected? 7.
How many prizes for the Jews? Of the 850 Nobel Prize winners, 177 have been Jewish and several were born in Israel. 20 % of them have gone to Jews.
This is not racism and Israel has plenty of dullards and morons. But the price a real anti-Jewish boycott would cost can give you an idea of what kind of war Israel is fighting: civilization against darkness.
If Israel and the Jews, who make up just 0,2 % of humanity, fall again, the world will be darker and meaningless.
If 6,000,000 Jews would not have perished in the Holocaust, can you imagine how much richer the world would be?
ime
8 years ago
You are suprised SJG would make a biggoted comment? The guy does that most of the time.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
twentyfive,

What on earth are you talking about?

txtittyfag is the one who talked about presuming someone was Jewish.

Lately I've been reading about Israel's Kibbutzes. Most interesting.

SJG

Amy Winehouse - Love Is A Losing Game
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMO5Ko_7…

Why does minor mode music sound sad?

http://cloud.freehandmusic.netdna-cdn.co…

This really doesn't look or sound that way either, just the Fdim7 and Fm chords. Otherwise more of a jazz harmony, maj7 and 9 chords.

Classic minor mode:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5A-4VGfx…

http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=hous…

Usually I've seen this written in the key signature of Gmaj, which means it is in Em. And E is a good one for slow rock songs. But here it is written in C, meaning it is in Am. They say it is the minor third which gives it the distinctive sound. And here they let you hear that on the 4th note.

But why is it sad? Maybe just because it is different? They say that Thelonius Monk "found the cracks in the diatonic scale". I believe that it is something like that. Blues players are always not bending on the third.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
Ah!

http://cloud.freehandmusic.netdna-cdn.co…

By sometimes using E instead of C as a cadence note, and then using the Cmaj7 chord, instead of C7, they are playing B on top of E instead of the more common Bb. So that makes for an augmented 5th relative to E. This is standard for torch songs, conveys that longing sensation.

SJG
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
mistake, E major chord is E G# B. so that Cmaj7 is still in the E major scale.

https://www.basicmusictheory.com/e-major…

But using the Cmaj7 instead of C7 means that the melody is supposed to revolve around C, instead of the more common Mixolydian making it revolve around G.

The G9 chord would still use a flat 7th. That flat 7th would be F, so a G7 chord is still diatonic in C. This is pretty standard. Oh well, the people who write such music may not figure it out quite this way, but I know that they intuitively hear these sorts of things, from other pieces.

SJG
Hugh_G_Rection
8 years ago
Nobody asked but my current occupational description is "Asshat".
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Nothing wrong with that, Hugh. At one point or another, we all are.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
Amy Winehouse - Love Is A Losing Game
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMO5Ko_7…

http://cloud.freehandmusic.netdna-cdn.co…


So we have a chord progression

Fdim7
Cmaj7
G9
Fm
Cmaj7
G9

Though it probably ends on Cmaj7 and the note C

So the dim chord is like playing B D F, its the monster chasing the girl, and in movies girls always run up staircases.

So Fdim = F Ab B, and note that F B is the tritone. Though not all of the notes are diatonic ( in the scale ) the F B tritone should make listeners feel that this is to use the C maj scale.

Fdim7 = F Ab B Eb, that is it should be a flatted 7th

but in the RH part they write D F Ab B ???

Cmaj7 = C E G B

so they use that, plus some non-harmonic D. But this helps it get to G9

G9 = G B D F A Notice since G is the Dominant, that the flatted 7th is still diatonic.

Fm = F Ab C This should be softer than Fdim, as there is no tritone ( flatted 5th, 6 semitones step )

But then this goes easily to Cmaj7, and then G9

The only way to get a white note augmented 5th is E - C. And they get that when they make E the second cadence note, over Cmaj7, and C sounding in the LH part.

And it does seem like it ends on C and Cmaj7.


I knew a life long organ player who you could just hand sheet music too and he could sing it perfectly, including things which didn't seem to follow any harmony rules.

He said, "So does it sound like ...?"

And I was flabergasted and said, " ... y-e-s ..."

He just chuckled and told me about a college class he was in where the instructor would just hand him music to sing, when he wanted the class to know what it sounded like.

SJG

PS according to this, Fdim7 has a double flatted E, = D.
http://chord-c.com/guitar-chord/F/dimini…
Don't know about this dim7.
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
Also, I guess you can also get the white note Augmented 5th / Major 3rd in F - A and in G -B.

SJG
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