"Do you have kids?"

Yes, but I think it happens with anyone - I get some stupid ass questions when dealing with people through work. "Where do you live?" "What do you drive?" "Where do you hang out at?" "Are you married?" Usually they're just trying to figure out how much you're worth.

As for her asking about kids, it could be something as simple as making small talk. Maybe she has a kid and thought that was a common thing you two could talk about. If she's more clever, maybe she was asking if you have a kid because if you did, you may have less money to blow in the club versus a divorced or never married guy with no kids.

I actually asked if she did and she said no. But you're right, she probably was indirectly sizing up my wallet.

Never had a stripper ask me that...but ya definitely sizing uo how much disposable income you might have

I get asked that quite frequently and I don't think it has a damn thing to do with guessing the size of my wallet. Telling them I have kids tells them what? That I am broke or a cheap spender? That would sure be a wrong assessment.

I get asked that a lot too. Always assumed it was just "small talk" trying to get to know each other.
The strippers looking for a regular ask all sorts of personal questions.

I'm guessing it's mostly just a get-to-know-you question. When they ask me that, I generally either tell them no or if they are doing particularly well, not yet. I think these kinds of questions are more about building rapport and getting a better idea of what she might do to tailor her performance to you. In other words, she isn't trying to judge you, but instead to find ways for you to like her better.

Some clubs and dancers have more of a focus on sitting around and talking than others. The question I find annoying is on the rare occassion that they ask my age. The response is generally something like: OH WOW, YOU LOOK 25! and I think I am supposed to be overjoyed with their approval at being so young-looking. ;)

Once I was sitting with a dancer who was telling me about a conversation she just had with a guy from India. She had asked him what religion he was and he said Hindu. She asked if he ever wondered if "we were right". I don't think she sold him any dances that night.

It may have something to do with the roles we paly in our lives. Without kids you are just a man or a husband but with kids she is potentially having sex with a father and that may be different to her. Some of them have feelings and it isn't always bullshit.

As others have said, it's probably often small-talk, many people often talk about their kids , also some people are more talkative than others , Latin people are often talkative & family oriented so a plausible reason the convo went in that direction.

She could have been trying to size you up in some way - some dancers may think a guy w/ kids may be more settled down & perhaps a less PITA custy (whereas a single guy may want to get w/ them, etc).

Or maybe she wants to get w/ you & was wondering about your availability (as in her not wanting to get involved w/ a guy w/ kids).

"Latin people are often talkative & family oriented "
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I'm not Latin, but this is almost exactly what I was thinking. Sounds like she's into you, James.

Normally, it's not something they ask me. But last Sunday I was actually in a club myself sitting with a Latina and she asked me did I have any kids.

No not really. It's pretty much typical questions and then wherever the convo goes from there.

I have had stripper ask if I had kids, if I was marries, if I was ever married. They do it to open the conversation. They want to talk about their kids, ex's, etc. I had one girl tell me she does more with married guys because she think they are safer from everything because they worry about taking things home.

In general women like to know people and know things like that about people.

Those who dance in strip clubs are just as interested in outside relationships as others are, and all the more so as you describe this as a low mileage club.

I had a Denny's waitress who with two of my consecutive visits to the restaurant spent the whole time of my visit standing at my table talking to me, pitching how much she wants someone she and her kids can move in with and share the rent. She was Latina.

Another Latina strip club dancer, with two kids, told me, "I'm one of the ones who got *lucky*. I'm engaged." What she was telling me was not the truth at all, but it was what she very much wanted, and wanted to make me understand. It was not a high mileage club, but she still went what distance she could for me in the collective VIP room.

Now when getting to know an AMP girl, after telling her about myself, I always ask, "So do you live here in San Jose, by yourself?"

It is an intentionally transparent attempt to detect SO's and kids.

In sex work places girls know that they should not inquire into such areas. But sometimes girls have an agenda besides just making money.

SJG

It's just small talk.

Just answer with, "Yes, and they're all older than you."

Maybe she wants to be your baby-mama

^Uhhh... I basically did have an older stripper ask me if I'd be her sperm donor once.

Her logic was I'm smart and educated and tall. If I honestly knew I could do it and be done with it I may have helped her out, but I knew it's the kind of thing that haunts you forever.

I don't read much of the so-called "PUA" stuff; stumbled on an article about it in regards to strip clubs the other day, but that's about it.

I was just wondering though if you veterans have canned answers to some of this stuff. Mostly, I'm wondering what pushes things along with a dancer more, or possibly is better if you're hoping a dancer will be into you. Obviously, whether or not your answers are the truth in this case isn't important.

Kids question, for example... do you think you are better off saying that you do or don't? Or maybe it doesn't matter? If you have a girlfriend or wife? Your job? etc. etc. Do you guys have answers that you think "work" better, or do you simply just go with the truth on everything?

I have read some PUA stuff, and I think it boils down to: Talk to girls, avoid a couple of categories of mistakes, and if you can't think of anything to say, here are 50 examples of what you can make up.

I think it's a lot more important to understand how strip club communication works, not be emotionally reactive, and to allow the relationship to ebb and flow naturally, rewarding the things you like and not rewarding things you don't like. I.e., if she pulls back a little on a particular visit, there might be a reason for it that you can't overcome that night. If you try to do that by spending $1000, you will likely just end up broke and bitter.

The problem with the stripper PUA stuff is that it usually says to talk to a stripper without spending any money. That's usually not going to last very long unless you're there with a group of friends who are spending money and she is taking one for the team.

All the time. It's just get to know you chatter. Some I suspect just use it to get the conversation rolling while others are trying to figure out who and what they are dealing with. No big deal really unless you have some reason to feel defensive about it.

It's just small talk. It happens to me all the time.

And invariably, it ends with "wanna do VIP/dances?"

These women are in sales. And getting you to be more comfortable with them is a tactic to help them get you to spend money on them.

Was trying to figure out what PUA meant - per UrbanDictionary:

PUA = Pick Up Artist

"... I was just wondering though if you veterans have canned answers to some of this stuff. Mostly, I'm wondering what pushes things along with a dancer more, or possibly is better if you're hoping a dancer will be into you ..."

I'm no PUA by any stretch of the imagination.

If what you mean by "a dancer will be into you" is getting a dancer interested in you in a *non* P4P sense I'd can only guess at the following:

+ be close in age - maybe 15 years age difference @ max assuming you look good

+ many playas will say not to spend $$$ on her - many will say once you spend $$$ on her she will see you purely as a custy/cash-cow


I would say in general one can pick up a dancer non P4P just as one would pick up a civvy, for the most-part - so if one has game for picking up civvies that are hot and young then it would not take a completely different type of game to pick up dancers, IMO - IMO when it comes to picking-up hot young women either you got it or you don't (and most guys don't IMO).

Sure - there is always the "chance" that you can just be yourself and you can treat a dancer nicely and w/ time she may develop feelings for you as she gets to know you, but that is no different than w/ a civvy - i.e. I don't think there is any secret or "special sauce" that works w.r.t. seducing dancers any different than seducing/picking-up civvies.

If your statement was more in the context of P4P; then other answers would apply.