Dancer ethical dilemma

It's hard for me to relate because if I'm the customer I'm taking control of the situation and letting A know I know B and have some dances planned with her but after we're done I'd also like to get some from her. But as far as who is entitled to the customer I'd say B because it's her regular and I assume she texted him during the day and planned a visit.

Reasoning 1: A & B. If you have the dough, why not get those couple lap dances from B, and if you are feeling really brave, spend money on VIP with her. A great form of foreplay before sex and she still gets paid. Go back and now do a VIP where sex will absolutely be on the table and enjoy that. Both ladies got their share of the dough and you the customer not only get a great lap dance but sex right afterwards.

Reasoning 2: A. While B can perform a GREAT lap dance session making wish for no dancer better, A can dance probably well enough to make you at full attention, but good enough should be ok because next the pants come off and your rocket is in her socket, which is the ultimate end game I can assume. If B really wants to keep you as a customer wistful thinking can make her actually want to put out to keep you but don't hold your breathe. B can then become the "side" stripper (can't believe you people really relate strippers with real world girlfriends but that's not the topic at hand) and you can take her to the back when A isn't in the club. But for the now, go for A

Ethics? In a strip club?

Yeah grand I was wondering if somebody would pick up on that contradiction. But play along anyway. If there's not going to be a cat fight, who should get the customer?

B first then let A finish what B started.

Seems to me that when a dancer goes on stage, any claim on the customer is lost and he is free game for any other dancers. Most clubs I frequent have a rule that dancers can not approach a customer who is sitting with another dancer. The way it usually plays out is with a desperate plea for a dance from (using this scenario) Dancer A right before she needs to go on stage. If that doesn't happen, she nneds to get back in line and wait another opportunity

B should get the customer.

He is her regular. She has spent time building a rapport with him, thus invested much more energy into him already. A has only chatted with him for a few songs.

They texted earlier to confirm he was coming in [to see her]. This means he already gave her his word and vice versa; they have already agreed to spend time together.

B is also prettier and better looking than A. While this is subjective, for the sake of this ethical dilemma, we will say Customer agrees.

B should get the customer. She should take him into VIP and make him spend until he can't spend anymore, leaving no money left to be spent on A.

^^^haha says a stripper lol

Ethics wont have anything to do with how this gets resolved. I bet the girl that wins is the one that most often gets her own way. Which ever one is the bitchiest, cause the customer is weak and probably doesn't want a confrontation.

I agree the customer sounds weak. I also agree with Nina that it's B 's regular but he should save a little bit after that VIP for A variety is the spice of life.

JS69 --> "Ethical question: who now gets to sit with customer and seek to withdraw from this ATM? Is it A, B, or A and B?"

Whomever the customer wants to! The customer did not promise anything to A. Usually what I do, it tip A for her time (even $5 will do, but a gentleman could be more generous), and tell A that "I am sitting with B now" and send her on her way with the tip, as politely as possible (she's a professional, but she's still a flesh and blood woman). Then get B settled in.

JS69 --> "Customer is too inexperienced or shy to know what to do or to express an opinion. He just sits there and lets the girls figure it out."

Danger! Bee-BOOP, Bee-BOOP, Bee-BOOP .. ;-)

Hey, we've all been there. The inherent problem there is the SC is a pseudo-social experience, not a fully sanitized professional experience. Yet it's not a true social experience either. Cat fight? Yep.

JS69 --> "Who should get the customer under this scenario?"

Some of this depends on club etiquette. Some clubs allow for A to have the right of way (very slow hustle, laid back club). Most clubs would allow B to have the right of way for 2 reasons (1) customer was there to see B as her regular and (2) B was sitting with customer since A left for stage. The problems A had are twofold: (1) A left her "kill" unattended and (2) A didn't let the customer know what she wanted.

Ooh, I love these ethics posts. They are so much fun to answer.

"haha says a stripper lol"

YUP.

. . . I will probably have a similar dilemma. I have a CF who works Thur-Mon. I went in on a Sunday to see CF and she wasn't working, so I saw another girl. I agreed that I would see the new girl again on some future Sunday (who works Sun-Mon only). Now, I fully expect to go in on some Sunday in the future and I wonder if I see both dancers, who should I sit with? What would each dancer think? Both would expect me to be there to see them. CF has invested way more time into me than the new girl and I have spent way more money on CF than the new girl.

CF and new girl look about the same (8/10), same ethnicity, same body type. CF is unreliable and aloof, but a full party girl with lots of mileage and less rules the more you spend. The new girl is more like a SW chick: reliable, punctual, less of a drinker, a more professional demeanor, dances are very strict with boundaries that do not change (not a problem for me), etc. Both are great conversationalists.

That should be interesting as well!

"Whomever the customer wants to." I think this is ultimately the right answer. Nina, I disagree. However, since b is the regular and he was there for b, she deserves at least as much as a.

here's a simple answer, whichever you want more bad should sit with you. High quality Lap dances or sex.

Plot twist, I was dancer B. I got the customer quickly into VIP, where we stayed all night. I saw dancer A in the dressing room when it was time to go home, she was complaining to dancer C about not making enough money. I smiled as I walked past.

@Dominic77 in your dilemna I would choose neither. CF sounds too unreliable for a garunteed good tie on a particular night, too much of a headache to make plans and overall just too finnicky along with seemingly expensive if you have to spend a certain amount to get to a certain level of fun. The new girl is just plain boring. No flair, no excitement too expectant, brings nothing NEW to the table and is too limiting.

I'd just find a whole new chick who you can find reliable or quit having favs and just mess with whoever is available during your time of need.

Is "A" new? If not, surely she knows the the regular belongs to "B" and stays away. If she is new. "B"'s posse in the dressing room will set her straight.

Scenario is well known to me. Trust me. New dancer "A" was warned she will be swimming with the fishes unless she stays away from me.

That explains why Nina wants JS69 to choose B. She hates competition that can obviously trump her and she can do nothing about it. Though I stand by my sentiments. Regular or no, your the man that spends the bread, and ultimately it's up to you. Especially since there's no real "relationship" with either of these women.

Yeah I was thinking dancer A was probably aware that Customer was in there to see B.

I don't see any irony in looking for ethical behaviour in a strip club. Ethics and morals are closely related, but not identical.

I've always understood morals to be the "principles* of right and wrong, and ethics to be the practice of those principles.

This, if a stripper is acting according to her principles, she's acting ethically. :)

As for the question at hand, from the dancers' standpoints, since the customer didn't reject either of them, and accepted, to a degree, the attentions of both, they both have a "claim" on him, and neither can call that claim absolute.

Now it's up to the customer to decide. :)

Looks like Nina won.

Dancer B just has to assert her claim on the PL by telling Dancer A that he is her regular and that he came in to see her.

Like Dominic suggested, PL should tip Dancer A for her time.

"That explains why Nina wants JS69 to choose B. She hates competition that can obviously trump her and she can do nothing about it."

Lol right that's why when I worked at all the 8 mile clubs I made more money than the extras girls and continue to be a top earner everywhere I go. ;)

^does that say more about you or the extras girls?

Chessmaster - Both. In Detroit I had little competition among extras girls because they were too busy competing with each other and undercutting each other for cheap prices, whereas my prices stayed the same. If an extras girl charges $100 for her service, it will cost her a few songs of her time. A few songs of my time would also amount to $100, just dancing. So we'd be making pretty much the same per song. Relatively.

Estafador - At the last extras club I worked at I literally won a trophy for "Best Lap Dance" because the managers knew I didn't do extras but led the charts in songs spent in the VIP almost every night. Just a reference point. They weren't really "competition" for me anyway, we don't even provide the same services.

Interesting discussion.

Obviously it's the customer's choice. But that's not really an answer here because like I said he's too much of a pussy to take charge so the girls have to figure it out.

I do not know if A knew that this was B's regular customer. But I think what A would say is that doesn't matter because A sat down when the customer was alone and B was sitting with me. So A would claim squatters rights.

My opinion is that if the customer won't act B should get first shot. But what really happened is that B voluntarily got up and let A sit back down with him. She is a nice, sweet, non confrontational dancer and that's part of the reason. I also suspect that she thought that the customer would appreciate her selflessness. She said he often dances with others but just finishes with her. Of course, as I tried to tell her, he may choose pussy over selflessness.

I left soon thereafter so I don't know which dancer got the VIP. I will ask the next time I see B.

I would rather get a hot lap dance from a hot woman than extras from a plain stripper. If I just want release, might as well just rub one out.

It is very rare for a hot stripper to degrade herself to giving head to make money.

So it seems that I was correct JS69 .

I don't know there's any universal ethics for this, but I know what MY personal ethics are. And the code I live by is:

Nina-->"They texted earlier to confirm he was coming in [to see her]. This means he already gave her his word and vice versa; they have already agreed to spend time together."

For me, the appointment is sacrosanct. If I make an appointment with a stripper, and she breaks it without telling me, I'm irritated; if she goes to dance with someone else while I'm there without my approval, she's fired and I'm finding a new regular girl, period. And she can rely on me the same way. If we make an appointment, I'm hers for the night, she can rely on me spending what I usually spend, no dances with anyone else without me asking her first. If she was not planning on coming in, and dragged herself in just for me -- well, I'll be there, period, spending on her what she expects.

I don't say that's the right model for everyone. But for me, it gives me the experience I'm looking for.

In the end, though, it's down to what the customer is looking for, period. The only reason this is a problem at all is this: "Customer is too inexperienced or shy to know what to do or to express an opinion. He just sits there and lets the girls figure it out." Bad customers lead to bad situations. Confident assertive customers may sometimes have to give a dancer a minor disappointment here and there, but in the end it will prevent any super negative dancer politics. If the customer is a little bitch, bad things can happen.

@Nina well of course you won. Everybody else was busy wearing their pussy out over dancing. I assume the pussy can only take so much pounding before the girl has to go to bed, severely limiting clientele. I would presume dancing would require less physical exertion then actually having sex. They say sex is a form of exercise as well. When I say competition I mean just making money in general. But while I'm a skeptic at you making more money than the brothel stripper, I have no reason not to believe you either so I'll just take your word for it unless otherwise specified.

Good, at Twosheds a couple years ago people tried to doubt my earnings when I was working at a champagne room club and I uploaded pics of my receipts showing several nights of several hours in the champagne rooms. Lol

I should also add that as a regular customer, I tend to take the long view of things. There's plenty of time to get my hands on A, on a night that I haven't already made an appointment with B. In fact, it's something to look forward to. It is VERY COMMON that I'm with my appointment girl and find myself interested in someone else. When my appointment girl is on stage or in the back, I'll bump into the other girl and get her number so I can arrange to see her another time. I think sometimes guys are posing these situations as if it's a one-time-thing, after which all opportunity is lost. I know a few guys here travel to SC, but I'd bet most guys here go to their local clubs semi-regularly, and always have the opportunity to circle back around to anyone they miss on a particular night ... as long as you get their number, it's easy

I don't see a contradiction in discussing ethics regarding strippers. But isn't there a contradiction in a question of ethics being brought up by a lawyer? : )

Everything written on TUSCL should be considered as fiction. Such trivial drivel...

Truth. Self edification is a sign of little paternal attention as a child.

^^^ BOOM! THAT JUST HAPPENED!

lol, my response was a response to jackslash; meat just slipped the tip in before I did

+1 subraman that's how I would have looked at it

For crying out loud, it's up to the customer to say something. I never had a problem telling dancers B to Z that I was here for A. Newbies maybe were miffed, but the rest understood.

Choose A, strippers are flakey hoes who don't even keep commitments with themselves. Fuck Debussy

Ugh. I hate it when people have to tell us how good they are, i.e. Kanye West.

JS. I think that if you were there to see B, you should have told that to A up front. That's typically how it works with me. On the other hand, if you want to pursue A, you're just going to have to tell B. No way everyone wins.

One thing to consider is that not all customers think of a strip club as a whorehouse. "Mileage" may get more money for a single dance but a relationship built over time can be more lucrative to the dancer and more satisfying to the customer. It's not always about getting something the wife can't or won't provide; sometimes it's its another perspective on an issue that won't get back to the wife through one of her friends. I am personally turned off by dancers whose initial approach is that their dances are the dirtiest in the club. But if they sit down and try to have a conversation I will at least buy a drink. So while A may have a reputation B may also know that the customer is not into ITC extracurriculars and therefor not feel threatened, especially if the customer has demonstrated some faithfulness in the past and saved something for her.

The customer is king, so if he's with either dancer at his table, the other has to back off UNLESS invited over, or A and B are already fucking each other so they don't mind sharing (BTDT). I can't trust the extra girls to not provide for other PL's any more than a dancer can expect a PL to not canoodle with other dancers. It's a jungle out there but there ARE Laws Of The jungle.

Point of clarification: I was not the customer and I had nothing to do with this except as an observer and to tell B that I thought she should stay with the guy.

Lots of people point out the customers obvious role in this. But I think many (likely most) customers are too timid to deal with something like this. They don't know what to do so they do nothing. Or they are too afraid of offending whatever dancer they want least. I think most of us would have dealt with this easily and quickly but that's not going to happen with a huge number of customers.

Interestingly, I"ve read multiple threads on SW where the majority more or less say, "No such thing as stealing customers, it's whoever the customer wants, there's no ethics beyond that". Which is a shocking POV to me, especially from SW, since every strip club I've ever been to seems to have it's own sometimes-malleable always-nebulus code of ethics as far as when you can approach customers.

Again, to me, the appointment is so inviolable that, assuming stripper B has been keeping up her end of the bargain, that there are few circumstances I can see that would get me to switch to stripper A. In this situation, what I personally do is get A's number and plan to see her another time.

When the girls on the pink site get I say as long as you do the opposite of what they say you should be fine

While the appointment is sacred, that really doesn't answer this situation. Because here while they had an appointment, the customer was going to be there for several hours and it was understood that he would only be with B for part of that time. The practice was that she often left him for part of the time while he played with others. A stopped at his table while B was off with me instead of this guy. So A being with him wasn't really contrary to the spirit of the appointment.

Only time an appointment is sacred is during a press conference and a job interview.

While the appointment is sacred, that really doesn't answer this situation. Because here >while they had an appointment, the customer was going to be there for several hours and >it was understood that he would only be with B for part of that time. The practice was that >she often left him for part of the time while he played with others. A stopped at his table >while B was off with me instead of this guy. So A being with him wasn't really contrary to >the spirit of the appointment.

Ethics are for loosers/get played. Dancer B can not sit with regular the whole night. This is a woman share program. It would be very rare for B to say "fuck the other guys, I made my house fee tonight, I'd rather sit here with your than walk around and "wanna dance" to PLs". B can't spend the whole night with the customer, she has to go to other customers. Once the "date" is over or first customer to dancer $ handover happened, the appointment was kept, both sides are free to split for the rest of the night.

I once got a "fuck that, Im not hustling tonight, I'll BS with you for almost free". That was from a dancer who quit stripping on her 21st birthday a few weeks later (became a bartender), that dancer was sitting by herself most of the night in her phone, I had to walk upto her and introduce myself, because the stereotypes say that she has zero chance asking me for a dance, so some dancers dont approach me on stereotypes even if they are customerless and I have to cold call them out of the corner of strippers in their phones if I love what I see.

The prearranged appointment is over after > $0.00 spent between customer and dancer B.

s88-->"Ethics are for loosers/get played. Dancer B can not sit with regular the whole night. This is a woman share program. It would be very rare for B to say "fuck the other guys, I made my house fee tonight, I'd rather sit here with your than walk around and "wanna dance" to PLs" " --->end quote s88

s88: That's the way I almost always SC: appointment up front, and the stripper stays with me the 3-5 hours until I leave, exclusively... although I don't try to do this after it gets busy (say, after 10:30pm), it is otherwise the way I've been strip clubbing for the past 7 years, week in and week out. If we have an appointment, she's mine. There's no getting played on either side -- she's getting my $, exclusively.

That said, I can see why some of you guys would not agree with "the appointment is inviolate" if that's not the way things work with you, and the appointment doesn't get you any guarantee of better treatment.

JS69-->" Because here while they had an appointment, the customer was going to be there for several hours and it was understood that he would only be with B for part of that time. The practice was that she often left him for part of the time while he played with others. A stopped at his table while B was off with me instead of this guy. So A being with him wasn't really contrary to the spirit of the appointment." ---> end quote JS69

Oh! That changes everything. If it's a "she'll hang out for a bit, then flit away, then flit back", If she's running off to see other customers, he can do dances with other girls. It's hard to see what the appointment is buying him at all, and also that the notion that he might run into a girl he likes better is just the rules of the road

If the PL is too timid to decide it should be B

As the saying goes – “communication is the key to any “relationship””.

I agree w/ the others that say it’s the custy’s decision – but w/ many custies “not being versed in the game” nor having been TUSCLarly educated; one can see how issues will arise in the often competitive and cutthroat world of SCs.

Being that communication is key:

a) if the custy is a regular then he should know how to handle things

b) if the custy does not have balls; then somebody needs to take-charge so might as well be the dancer that knows the game – i.e. she should explicitly tell balless something like “I’ll be right back to be with you - other girls will approach you but if you want to spend time with me just tell them you are waiting for me”

If neither stripper nor custy “communicates” properly then garbage-in garbage-out results.

But I agree if the custy is alone then he’s available unless he sez he’s not.

I think you hit on the crux of the problem, paps. The main lesson here is one for Stripper B -- since the situation is that the custy does not have balls, and she probably already knew it -- is that the experienced stripper should explicitly improve her customer reservation communication

Yes

The custie has no obligation and should just consider the best option for him long term. That all depends on his individual goals.

Loyalty means nothing. Strippers and escorts are always flaky. Had my regular dancers say to me "I'll be right back, dont let any other girl sit with you", after 10 mins I go looking for them, on their phone in the corner with other free strippers or with a bottle service regular for the next 45 mins. If she gets up, she has 1 song to get back, or I start plotting how to get CF #2 and CF #3 in the seat next to me. 30 minutes or an hour later when CF #1 appears in my corner of the SC, when CF #2 is sitting and talking with me, I am sure to lock and follow eyes with CF #1 when CF #1 walks by. Comparing CF #1 with #2 and #3, #1 hugs and says bye, #2 and #3 dont. Making #1 jealous that i am spending $ on #2 if #1 leave me is my strategy. Right or wrong strategy with CF #1 to get more regular with CF #1?

I say that it depends on if A knew it was B's regular. If it was unknown or say B was working on a different customer and not paying attention to her regular yet then I think B has a right to attempt a dance with the customer, however A should also be able to read the atmosphere and take the hint if the customer is uninterested in her and let A do her thing. If she doesn't then sure try to move in again. (if you think its worth it)

On the other note if A knew it was B's regular she should not have gone back to them after she came off stage and left it at just trying while B was on stage.

As I have not ran into this dilemma yet, based upon my own ethics, I agree with Nina, Papi and Phoenix. A should have taken the hint (if possible), B say a quick hi, and the custy, since he talked to B, should have the testicular fortitude to say something A.

s88-->" Loyalty means nothing. Strippers and escorts are always flaky. Had my regular dancers say to me "I'll be right back, dont let any other girl sit with you", after 10 mins I go looking for them, on their phone in the corner with other free strippers or with a bottle service regular for the next 45 mins. If she gets up, she has 1 song to get back, or I start plotting how to get CF #2 and CF #3 in the seat next to me. 30 minutes or an hour later when CF #1 appears in my corner of the SC, when CF #2 is sitting and talking with me, I am sure to lock and follow eyes with CF #1 when CF #1 walks by. Comparing CF #1 with #2 and #3, #1 hugs and says bye, #2 and #3 dont. Making #1 jealous that i am spending $ on #2 if #1 leave me is my strategy. Right or wrong strategy with CF #1 to get more regular with CF #1?"

s88 has gone to plaid!

So I saw B last night and, as Paul Harvey would've said, here's the rest of the story.

I left right after B let A sit with her regular. As expected A offers him full service in the VIP. Customer says no thanks.

B returns to the customer. He tells B about A's offer and says he doesn't want to fuck some ho who has fucked every other guy in the place.

B gets her VIP with customer.

And all is well.

Well then, guess the THOUGHT of smashing "unattainable" pussy is more powerful than just fucking readily available pussy. Kudos to the high mileage non-extra dancer for her powerful sales skills. Kudos to her. Then again psychology isn't interesting if every single human had the exact same thought process