Follow Up
Timex345
Illinois
I posted a discussion topic awhile ago announcing my decision to stop patronizing showclubs.
The decision was very difficult and it took awhile for me to go cold turkey.
It took about a month for me to fully quit. I am writing this discussion topic for anyone out there who
may be struggling with their own attendance and may find this of interest. I am also writing this for myself because
I find it helpful. About a month ago, I found it relatively easy to stop attending one of my favorite clubs around 90 minutes from my home.
It was a long drive, and while I did have a crush on one of the girls there, I had had enough of the routine of driving there nearly every weekend.
I could have visited today. But, I just had lost the interest. Last year at this time, I would have been there.
The hard club to stop attending was about 20 minutes from my home. I had fallen really hard for one of the girls there.
I had made the mistake of giving this girl my number. She would contact me each Monday to ask if I was visiting her.
I fully understood that she was texting all of her regulars. That's like having a drug dealer calling a person trying to quit drugs.
It just is not a good thing. I would usually say yes or come up with an excuse why I could not visit. For some reason, I thought I was somehow
different. Silly me, I know. This past Friday, I made a special effort to visit with her. As I entered the club, I noticed her sitting with a customer.
I sat down and she did wave to me. I was prepared to wait. Not long after, she did stop by. Here is what finally pushed me to end
my showclub attendance. Keep in mind I have dropped a great deal of money on this girl over the past year or so.
Anyways, she barely sat with me before she hustled me for some dances. She asked how many I would like.
I said five. After the fourth, she was called to the stage. She had mentioned she had had a few drinks. This surprised me.
This is the first time I was there when she was a little tipsy. I went to the stage to pay for the four songs she did dance for me.
She still demanded that I pay for five saying that we had made a deal. I went ahead and paid. I thought I really don't need to get into
an argument with her. Worse, after she got off the stage, she did stop by again to say bye and let me know she was returning to the customer
she was sitting with when I arrived. I bought dances from another girl hoping to piss her off. Childish I know. But, I was hurt and pissed.
The customer she was sitting with was buying her drinks, but he did not even buy dances while I was there.
I left heartbroken and angry. I do owe her a bit of gratitude for being rude to me. It was just the motivation I needed to stop visiting her.
I realized that I am just a walking ATM maching to her. It hurts but I am finally free. Free from a life enslaved by my need for
validation from women who are deceitful and cruel. Free from the heartache and disappointment. I did change my phone number so she
has no way of ever contacting me. I had to change my number. I did send her several texts explaining why I was stopping my visits.
I doubt she would text me. But, she has always been my kryptonite, so I felt it better to not be tempted. I know I can't go back.
But, really there was no future with this woman. I would never really want to be with her. As a former customer, I know what goes on at a showclub.
Really, I would never want to have my girlfriend grind on customers for a living. I have been here before.
I know in time I will feel better. And, it is nice to actually have money in my bank account.
I set myself free and hope you find your freedom too whether it be at a showclub or outside of them.
The decision was very difficult and it took awhile for me to go cold turkey.
It took about a month for me to fully quit. I am writing this discussion topic for anyone out there who
may be struggling with their own attendance and may find this of interest. I am also writing this for myself because
I find it helpful. About a month ago, I found it relatively easy to stop attending one of my favorite clubs around 90 minutes from my home.
It was a long drive, and while I did have a crush on one of the girls there, I had had enough of the routine of driving there nearly every weekend.
I could have visited today. But, I just had lost the interest. Last year at this time, I would have been there.
The hard club to stop attending was about 20 minutes from my home. I had fallen really hard for one of the girls there.
I had made the mistake of giving this girl my number. She would contact me each Monday to ask if I was visiting her.
I fully understood that she was texting all of her regulars. That's like having a drug dealer calling a person trying to quit drugs.
It just is not a good thing. I would usually say yes or come up with an excuse why I could not visit. For some reason, I thought I was somehow
different. Silly me, I know. This past Friday, I made a special effort to visit with her. As I entered the club, I noticed her sitting with a customer.
I sat down and she did wave to me. I was prepared to wait. Not long after, she did stop by. Here is what finally pushed me to end
my showclub attendance. Keep in mind I have dropped a great deal of money on this girl over the past year or so.
Anyways, she barely sat with me before she hustled me for some dances. She asked how many I would like.
I said five. After the fourth, she was called to the stage. She had mentioned she had had a few drinks. This surprised me.
This is the first time I was there when she was a little tipsy. I went to the stage to pay for the four songs she did dance for me.
She still demanded that I pay for five saying that we had made a deal. I went ahead and paid. I thought I really don't need to get into
an argument with her. Worse, after she got off the stage, she did stop by again to say bye and let me know she was returning to the customer
she was sitting with when I arrived. I bought dances from another girl hoping to piss her off. Childish I know. But, I was hurt and pissed.
The customer she was sitting with was buying her drinks, but he did not even buy dances while I was there.
I left heartbroken and angry. I do owe her a bit of gratitude for being rude to me. It was just the motivation I needed to stop visiting her.
I realized that I am just a walking ATM maching to her. It hurts but I am finally free. Free from a life enslaved by my need for
validation from women who are deceitful and cruel. Free from the heartache and disappointment. I did change my phone number so she
has no way of ever contacting me. I had to change my number. I did send her several texts explaining why I was stopping my visits.
I doubt she would text me. But, she has always been my kryptonite, so I felt it better to not be tempted. I know I can't go back.
But, really there was no future with this woman. I would never really want to be with her. As a former customer, I know what goes on at a showclub.
Really, I would never want to have my girlfriend grind on customers for a living. I have been here before.
I know in time I will feel better. And, it is nice to actually have money in my bank account.
I set myself free and hope you find your freedom too whether it be at a showclub or outside of them.
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21 comments
No matter what, good luck.
Strippers are like a door knob, erbody gets a turn. I play with others, she plays with others, and we play with each other. You can't (or shouldn't) club if you can't grasp this concept. So yeah Carlos is right, you should stop.
You're getting too emotionally involved. A dancer is not your girlfriend. She is in the club to make money by entertaining men, and you're a customer who should aim at being entertained.
OP needs a GF. Not a plastic blow up one either. Trying to fill a need with strippers is a downward spiral.
Maybe he should try a real strip club before he quits. But on the other hand, if you fall in love just looking at a naked woman, what might happen if you got to fuck her? Better just stay away.
There are some great lines in that post!
I feel like you need to get into a actual relationship with someone who isn't your ideal type, just to get experience what a real relationship is like. Real relationships happen at your place, her place, and a lot of other places. Real relationships don't exist with you having to go to one specific place to experience it.
Papi said it best, when I need my car fixed I got to my mechanic; teeth cleaned, go to my dentist; and when I need to feel up on same ass and titties I go to my strippers.
He likes his dentist but he's not asking him to hang out
Some of us takes us longer to learn our lessons; perhaps it'll take the OP longer to get there but hopefully he will – at least changing his # and thus ceasing contact (hopefully) with this dancer was a good move.
Yeah; dancers can be ROBs; but custies also have a responsibility for not being chumps – it's not right for someone to steal your car but that does not mean you should not be smart-enough not to leave the keys in the ignition.