Lowest of the Low: share Your Club Lowlights
shailynn
They never tell you what you need to know.
Dancer quality and normal fights aside, what are some of the shittiest things you've seen in a low end club. I've been in dumps from Toronto to New Mexico and certainly have seen my share. Nowadays I avoid them all together and spend an evening watching a movie in my hotel room when on the road!
1. Not uncommon, but how shitty is it when the dancer has to pay a jukebox to be able to dance to make money?
2. I've been in a club that only served bud light cans (free with cover), red bull and bottle water. That's it and this wasn't a byob establishment.
3. One club gave a hand towel to each dancer when they went upstairs to the lap dance area, because they knew it was gonna get messy.
4. Gravel or dirt parking lots, almost always a sure tell sign you're at a shithole.
5. One club, the entire staff appeared to be on heroin with the exception of the doorman, he was just drunk.
6. A fight breaks out inside the club, 1 table gets broken, then the owner gets the two guilty parties outside to prevent any further damage, and encourages everyone in the bar to go outside and watch the rest of the fight in the parking lot.
7. When the kitchen is a vending machine selling Doritos and candy bars.
8. One time a beat dancer was bugging me then she had to go on stage. A cute dancer takes her place and I was actually planning on getting some lappers. Not so fast... Dancer on stages exits the stage in the middle of her set and proceeds to beat on the dancer sitting with me. Staff breaks it up, but all the other dancers and regulars are laughing at the battered dancer. She was new and I doubt she ever went back.
9. When the girl behind the bar is: house mom, bartender and VIP attendant all in one.
1. Not uncommon, but how shitty is it when the dancer has to pay a jukebox to be able to dance to make money?
2. I've been in a club that only served bud light cans (free with cover), red bull and bottle water. That's it and this wasn't a byob establishment.
3. One club gave a hand towel to each dancer when they went upstairs to the lap dance area, because they knew it was gonna get messy.
4. Gravel or dirt parking lots, almost always a sure tell sign you're at a shithole.
5. One club, the entire staff appeared to be on heroin with the exception of the doorman, he was just drunk.
6. A fight breaks out inside the club, 1 table gets broken, then the owner gets the two guilty parties outside to prevent any further damage, and encourages everyone in the bar to go outside and watch the rest of the fight in the parking lot.
7. When the kitchen is a vending machine selling Doritos and candy bars.
8. One time a beat dancer was bugging me then she had to go on stage. A cute dancer takes her place and I was actually planning on getting some lappers. Not so fast... Dancer on stages exits the stage in the middle of her set and proceeds to beat on the dancer sitting with me. Staff breaks it up, but all the other dancers and regulars are laughing at the battered dancer. She was new and I doubt she ever went back.
9. When the girl behind the bar is: house mom, bartender and VIP attendant all in one.
20 comments
11) DJ arrives with a card board box full of tapes
12) 300 lb dancer covered with tats and missing teeth is on stage and 2 guys are shoving dollar bills up her pussy.
Your #12..........you really saw that shit in a club somewhere?
Is there a tuscl review?
13. VIP room was a dark room with 2 couches with a sheet thrown overtop each. Dancer put on a CD in a mini boom box and it kept skipping.
16. Getting serviced while sitting on a metal chair in a partitioned room while two other guys are sitting on metal chairs, no more than 6 feet away, also getting serviced.
17. A club where the girls start at moderately obese and move up the weight scale from there.
18. Where several guys are sitting at the bar getting HJs from girls holding napkins, all the while there are napkins already littering the side walls of the club.
19. A club in which nobody speaks English and the stage dancer's pussy smells so bad that you get a whiff of it from a bar seat several feet away.
20. Where you order a common brand liquor and they pull a bait and switch with swill than can barely be choked down.
Idk shailynn, but after some of the things I've seen over the years, most of your annoyances seem kinda' minor or tame by comparison.
At least you could have had the decency to knock next time. Lol!!! ;)
We have all been to a shitty club, just some more often than others.
I went to a club once where the dancer stuffed my used condom in a crack behind the couch. She said that's where all the dancers put them.
There's one club I remember visiting where the dancers were expected to bring in their own CD's and play them on the club's CD player. I wonder how that would work now.
I sit there for a while and start to notice some thing that are a bit off. The mirrors behind the stage are all cracked. The HDTV in the corner isn't playing sports or a movie or anything like that - it's playing a documentary on the Communist revolution in Cuba.
A girl comes up to me and asks my name. I tell her and ask her the same. Her name is "Sin", and I ask why she picked that name. She says "because I want to kill myself, but I don't because it's a sin".