I have read many of the threads on here about OTC and other things. My CF has met me one time for dinner and then talked about OTC for a long time but always has excuses when time comes close. So I took the advice I read from some of you in a thread and texted her and said I will not be coming to see her my usual once a week or so and getting the MANY dances I get from her until she actually follows thru with the OTC. It has been about 2 weeks now and there have been times I felt like I had regained control but then other times where I think she has decided she can get along without my $ . She has texted me a couple of times telling me how slow it is and how she isn't making hardly any money and asking if I can come in. In the past when I have gotten these texts and gone in it didn't seem like she wasn't making any money as she was usually kept pretty busy. The last 2 weeks I have just texted back and said "you know what I want and how to get me back to coming to see u in the club." I thought by now she would give in and make the OTC happen but I haven't heard from her in over a week. I am getting weak and tempted to go see her at the club but know from what u guys say on here if I do that she will have ALL the power back again.
It's pretty clear she's not going to meet you OTC. It sounds like she is just trying to keep that option open to keep you as a customer. So she is just an ITC dancer for you. Either live with that, or go find some more girls to play with. Life is too short to let it drag out like this.
You can take a stripper to water but you can't make her drink it – i.e. either she does or she doesn't – no amount of pressure on your part will probably change that.
You may be flirting w/ RIL territory – be careful; it can be a dangerous condition.
As ATAC mentioned; you take it for what it is or move on – maybe you should play the field and see if another dancer can meet your needs and perhaps break the spell this harlot has on you LOL.
If what you want is sex – then perhaps a well-reviewed escort (TER) can help you get over the probable severe case of blue-balls you may be experiencing and then you may have a clear mind and see things differentlhy w.r.t this chick.
w/e you do – you need to deal w/ this one way or the other – often times a dancer will string along a RIL and at the end of the day no OTC and an empty bank account - do not allow yourself to be stringed along.
You haven't given us enough information to be sure, but no matter what you do with this girl I also get the distinct impression that you need more strippers in your life. There is absolutely no reason to settle for just one dancer, and doing so leaves you with no options and no leverage when there's no competition. I, for example, see the same stripper every week, and she is more incredible sexually than I ever could've imagined Even with that relationship, I still play with other girls and have other stripper relationships as a backup. Monogamy has no place in the strip club.
Agree with JS69 and the masses - Move on from this one and when you go into the club (make sure to go on a night she's working), get dances with other girls (none with her) and make sure she knows you're enjoying yourself. She'll either come around or ignore you. Either way you'll know where you stand and can move on.
Odds are this girl has a dozen or more guys she texts, and "not making any money" is pure SS.
Two weeks is nothing when it comes to personal finance. This girl is clearly reluctant. You either need a true financial emergency for her, or possibly to grossly overpay.
Or, just move on. You don't go to a grocery store to buy a car. Some girls never do OTC
Or...She does OTC, but she's not going to do it with you. Hard for the ego to take I know, but it's a girls choice. The only way for you to have the slightest shot is to be having fun with other women. Then her ego will be slightly bruised which could leave her vulnerable to your advances. But that's not a guarantee either, she really really might just not like you sexually
Good advice. Play with the other girls at her club. Definitely. And don't be a pussy. Just play with the others for a while. Don't immediately give in.
lol - with so many strippers out there willing to do OTC why are you chasing this one and pressuring her to do shit that she obviously isn't going for....and if she did eventually break down and agree (very doubtful) it sounds like she won't exactly be giving it her all. Move on and find someone willing.
If you want to find a woman you are special to, you're looking in the wrong place. Go on a regular dating site like Plenty Of Fish or something. Sex workers basically provide an enhanced form of masturbation, there is pretty much the same level of real connection with another person. Many strippers can be someone to chew the fat with like a good bartender.
If I understand your situation correctly, she has agreed to meet you OTC and then not come through with it, on multiple occasions? Is that correct?
If so, I would go to her club and get multiple dances from the other girls but not her. When she asks what is going on, you can truthfully tell her you are looking for what you want since she has obviously decided she cannot provide it. Don't be a RIL take control of the situation. Be nice about it and let her know exactly why you are shopping for a new girl.
She doesn't love you. She doesn't LIKE you. She will have a date with you, with no sex, if you pay her. She doesn't want to fuck you, and she won't. She might have guys she fucks for $$$ but you won't be one of them.
I applaud you standing your ground, but bludgeoning a resistant girl is not going to work. If she's struggling to wrap her arms around it despite your current spending, then landing her is not a short game. I've been in your shoes multiple times and I've always found that a little finesse goes a long way in these situations. Letting them feel like they are the ones making the decision matters in my experience.
I usually let a girl like this know that I would like keep seeing her, but that any favorite that I visit and spend good money on consistently is one that I see ITC and OTC. I even have a sad smile and an apologetic look that I use when I say something like this - and of course it is something that I never handle over text. I go on to let her know that I understand that it's not in her comfort zone, but that I hope she'll let me know if that changes. And then I let it percolate, go back to the club in a few weeks, check in on her and spend a little money on her but not too much, rinse, repeat...
Now I don't go through this effort for just any ol' gal, but 3 of my best all time favorites came around this way. But again, this is not a short game. If she has held out this long, then clearly she is not comfortable with the notion yet and direct pressure is probably not going to work.
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You may be flirting w/ RIL territory – be careful; it can be a dangerous condition.
As ATAC mentioned; you take it for what it is or move on – maybe you should play the field and see if another dancer can meet your needs and perhaps break the spell this harlot has on you LOL.
If what you want is sex – then perhaps a well-reviewed escort (TER) can help you get over the probable severe case of blue-balls you may be experiencing and then you may have a clear mind and see things differentlhy w.r.t this chick.
Or you can join us in Detroit and get taken care off (https://www.tuscl.net/postread.php?PID=3…)
Meant - “as JS69 mentioned”
Two weeks is nothing when it comes to personal finance. This girl is clearly reluctant. You either need a true financial emergency for her, or possibly to grossly overpay.
Or, just move on. You don't go to a grocery store to buy a car. Some girls never do OTC
If you want to find a woman you are special to, you're looking in the wrong place. Go on a regular dating site like Plenty Of Fish or something. Sex workers basically provide an enhanced form of masturbation, there is pretty much the same level of real connection with another person. Many strippers can be someone to chew the fat with like a good bartender.
If so, I would go to her club and get multiple dances from the other girls but not her. When she asks what is going on, you can truthfully tell her you are looking for what you want since she has obviously decided she cannot provide it. Don't be a RIL take control of the situation. Be nice about it and let her know exactly why you are shopping for a new girl.
Now if you could just get me hooked up with his DS, that would me AWESOME.... ;-D
It's a hard lesson; we've all been there.
I usually let a girl like this know that I would like keep seeing her, but that any favorite that I visit and spend good money on consistently is one that I see ITC and OTC. I even have a sad smile and an apologetic look that I use when I say something like this - and of course it is something that I never handle over text. I go on to let her know that I understand that it's not in her comfort zone, but that I hope she'll let me know if that changes. And then I let it percolate, go back to the club in a few weeks, check in on her and spend a little money on her but not too much, rinse, repeat...
Now I don't go through this effort for just any ol' gal, but 3 of my best all time favorites came around this way. But again, this is not a short game. If she has held out this long, then clearly she is not comfortable with the notion yet and direct pressure is probably not going to work.
w.r.t. = with respect to