Running into an old favorite and then running away

avatar for alkdesmo
alkdesmo
California
I was traveling for work recently and happened to stop into a random club to finish out the night. As I sat down and started to scope out the talent, who should I spot up on stage but my old favorite. Needless to say, I was stunned to see her working as I hadn't seen her in over 2 years after she left the old club where we met. I had never gotten her info to connect with her, and I always figured she had just left the life and moved on.

After her stage show, she was circulating on the floor and immediately bolted over to join me as soon as she spotted me in the crowd. When I saw her up close, it was jarring to see what had happened to her in the past 2 years. Originally, she was everything you wanted in dancer. She resembled Megan Fox and had a tight, fit, natural body with a great face and also gave great dances, easily an 8-9. After we had gotten to know each other, the mileage went way up but not the cost, which was even better. Seeing her now though, it looked like she had aged 2 decades instead of just 2 years. She had put on at least 30 pounds (and in all the wrong places) and had modified her body in every way possible with tattoos all over her arms/chest/face as well as those crazy metal dermal implants, which made her look like something out of Mad Max. Plus, something was completely off with her face, like a plastic surgery gone bad.

We chatted briefly to catch up and it turns out that she had gotten kicked out of the club where we first met and had moved on to various other clubs for work. This probably shouldn't have been too surprising given that she fit the typical stripper stereotype in most every respect - no real education but made tons of money stripping and then spent it all on alcohol, drugs, and tattoos without saving a penny - and I'm guessing the lifestyle finally caught up with her. Plus, she used to get super drunk at work and would fight with the other dancers, which is why she probably got booted in the first place.

After a few minutes, she reached down and started stroking Mr. Happy and whispered that she really wanted to get "re-acquainted". If this had been 2 years ago, I would have already been in the back blowing both my wallet and my wad, but I was super hesitant given that she now looked like a candidate for those anti-meth ads and the fact that she was definitely drugged out already and seemed like a train wreck waiting to happen. Plus, when she casually mentioned that I should go to the ATM and pull out enough for big VIP and a large tip, I knew that this scenario wasn't going to end well and would probably end with me leaving poorer and unsatisfied.

Anyway, I told her that I needed to hit the bathroom before we did anything (actually true). As I went in, I looked back, and she was just stumbling around staring off into space with a glazed look in her eyes. The alarm bells in my head started getting much, much louder, and I decided to make a quick exit when she turned her back and started talking with another dancer. I hopped into my car and headed back to the hotel without looking back. If nothing else, I figured out what finally became of my old favorite and the answer is nothing good.

22 comments

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avatar for grand1511
grand1511
10 years ago
Good to see a story on here where the writer drew on the collectible knowledge and experience of this forum to make the right call.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
What a sad story, but all very familiar and believable. I don't mean to give you a hard time, but I do think it would've been better if you had just told her no thanks. Sure, it would have hurt her feelings, but less so that you just disappearing. What were you referring to?

avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
I meant what were you afraid of?
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
10 years ago
Strippers have an expiration date. Just like yogurt.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
Or maybe, as JS suggested, say "no thanks" and move on. Why be the one to *introduce* drama? There's enough of that already.
avatar for alcrutch
alcrutch
10 years ago
"No thanks" will lead to "why not" from her which will lead him to either have to lie or tell the truth that she is now unattractive to him. I can see no good ending from telling a currently drugged-out stripper two years past her prime that she isn't as attractive as she used to be so you don't want a dance from her. Secret escape seems like a much better plan.
avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
10 years ago
You did the right thing
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
10 years ago
Yeah, I agree with the no thanks. If you weren't planning to go VIP with any girls you could have just said you weren't in the mood. If you had another dancer in mind you could have been tough but firm.
avatar for alkdesmo
alkdesmo
10 years ago
Two things. Since I was on a business trip for work, I wasn't familiar with the club or other dancers. So, I wasn't waiting for any specific dancer and none of the other dancers that I saw really caught my attention so cutting my losses and leaving early didn't bother me. Second, she's definitely the sort of person who wouldn't take "no" or "I'm not interested" well, particularly when she's drunk/high. I've seen her get into it with other customers/dancers, and it wasn't pretty so I just didn't want to deal with her popping off or causing a scene.

Anyway, I'm a firm believer that this is strictly a transactional hobby. Yeah, I could have told her that she had gone from a 9 to a 5, but I didn't see what good it would get me and I left.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
10 years ago
I think you did the right thing, as far as hitting the eject button. I also agree with JS69 to an extent, I've been a pretty consistent voice for not being intimidated by strippers. A polite, "No thanks, I'm not doing dances right now, but I'll come get you if I change my mind, see you later!", said with a smile, will get you out of it, and you don't have to face the fact that you ran out the back door like a scared little kid. Plus, at least for me, it's just more fun at the club when I take control and don't set up a pattern of frightened passive aggressive behavior with the girls.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
10 years ago
Oops, was writing my response while you were writing yours above
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
10 years ago
Sounds like a lot of customer drama. If you couldn't handle telling her no thanks, then I guess running away was your next best option. It's your money so if you can't say no to people, then I guess running away is better than wasting money.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
10 years ago
ok, typed my answer before reading the last few posts.
no reason to stay and she doesn't take no very well, yeah, just leave then.
I wonder if I'm a lot more confrontational than several people. then again if I had no interest in staying, I'd leave too. I probably would have said no thanks and then walked out.
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
10 years ago
I understand those who say he should have said no thanks. But he knows this chick better than any of us. I don't think there is anything wrong with trying to avoid a confrontation with a drugged out stripper. Nothing good comes from it.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
10 years ago
Just saw an old favorite of mine tonight, but from over 20 years ago. She was 39 back then so nearing 60. About twice her size, which is surprising as she was a workout junkie when I last saw her. Nothing else done like yours, but...
avatar for Clackport
Clackport
10 years ago
I would have probably done the same thing. It's hard to keep saying no to a previous favorite you always used to get dances with.
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
10 years ago

I probably would have done the same thing.

Unless I was really wanting to stay and get dances from some other girl at the club.
Then I would have just told her that I'm not interested in dances tonight, or not right now.
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
10 years ago
"Strippers have an expiration date. Just like yogurt."

Brilliant!
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
Well, if you were on the verge of leaving anyway, I can see that incident being the catalyst.
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
10 years ago
Strippers read non verbal (visual) cues all the time as part of their job. Believe me u did the right thing by bolting out of there. She got rejected in the softest way possible. If you see her again at another time and she asks "what happened" you should say you went looking for her but she disappeared. It's a line I've heard from strippers many times.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
See now, Meat72's suggestion is the very thing I was talking about. Feigning interest where there is none isn't being polite, and it's setting you up for more drama later.

"Not right now", "maybe later", "I'm waiting for someone" (when you aren't), and all those types of out offs are telling her "maybe" when what you really mean is "no", possibly even "no, not ever, in your wildest dreams."
avatar for chandler
chandler
10 years ago
At my regular club, I'm constantly seeing past favorites who have been MIA for over a year come back looking worse for wear. (Sidenote: If you want to re-connect with a missing fave, IME your best bet is to keep going back to the same club until they return. Just be careful what you wish for.)

It happens so often, I've acquired the knack of saying a polite, "Hi, nice to see you again" but in a slightly patronizing tone and with body language that also tells her that I've moved on, so here's your quick hug, but don't even bother trying for more. As far as I know, though, I've yet to put it to the test on a hardcore meth-head.
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