How should I answer this question?

JohnSmith69
layin low but staying high
So my wife asked me this evening how I have managed to go without sex for the past several months while we've been separated. I couldn't think of any answer other than "I fuck a gorgeous 19 year old every week" which wouldve been a good answer except for what her divorce lawyer wouldve done with the information. So I said I didn't feel like talking about it. Anybody have a creative answer that I can use the next time that question is asked?

27 comments

Latest

Ironcat
10 years ago
Answer with a question like "I could ask you the same thing"
JamesSD
10 years ago
"Porn."
JamesSD
10 years ago
The passive aggressive answer is "I'm getting the exact same amount of sex I used to."
ididthisonce
10 years ago
^5 to all the answers!
lopaw
10 years ago
Masturbating.
Alot.
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
“I’ve been doing a lot of meditating”

“I’m a 50+ y/o guy and my libido is not what is used to be”

“I’m thinking of becoming a priest and dedicating my life to the needy”
bang69
10 years ago
I have been bizy
mikeya02
10 years ago
"None of your business, how have you been?"
Subraman
10 years ago
Let's just say that my dick is Crimea, and my right hand is Putin
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
^ yes - the "heavy-handed" approach :)
rattdog
10 years ago
i dunno - maybe after all those years of marriage i'm just not in the mood anymore
crazyjoe
10 years ago
Say " I got this, I have been doing your job for you"
shadowcat
10 years ago
That is a hard question to answer with so little information about what is actually going on between you and your wife. I settled out of court in mandatory mediation. My ex tried to bring up my infidelity(She knew about my relationship with a stripper) and the mediator told her that had no bearing on the proceedings. BTW it was a female mediator.
rockstar666
10 years ago
My wife hates sex and assumes I'm trained by her to not be sexual. Yeah, right.
PhantomGeek
10 years ago
"I've had a headache for the past few months."

You could shrug and tell you have two hands.

"After you, who can compare?"
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
Are you legally separated, or just separated?
Clackport
10 years ago
Porn
Subraman
10 years ago
Let's put it this way: if I dressed my right hand up in blue, and spray-painted my dick black, people in Ferguson would be holding nightly demonstrations about it

Let's put it this way, my tube socks cower in fear each time I open the drawer

Let's put it this way, my internet browser history alone is illegal in 17 countries

Diva1975
10 years ago
Lol subraman. You could really go out on a limb and say you miss being intimate with her and try to have sex!
mroo
10 years ago
If you're in legal proceedings with her, there is no answer you can give that will do anything but cause you grief.

Resist the urge to say anything to boost your ego, hurt her feelings, or anything else that remotely answers the question. She's probably trying to bait you into saying something stupid.
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
We are "just separated" and not "legally separated." Nonetheless mroo has the correct legal answer. I did however appreciate the many funny suggestions. Hard to pick a fav but I think I'd choose the tube sock if I had to choose the funniest one.

Diva, I considered that but it's not feasible for a host of reasons that are too complicated to explain.
EarlTee
10 years ago
"How have you managed to go without sex for the past several months?"
"Not very well."
4got2wipe
10 years ago
"I’m thinking of becoming a priest and dedicating my life to the needy” - Brilliant! ;)
4got2wipe
10 years ago
And just think, the priest answer won't cause problems for the divorce! That's what it's extra brilliant!
shadowcat
10 years ago
What it boils down to is do you want a divorce or not. If you want a divorce then tell her it is none of her business. If you don't want a divorce then lie. Don't let the fear of financial costs scare you. Your long run happiness is what you have to look at.
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
Thank you shadowcat. Good advice.
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
You should plead the 5th – anything can and will be used against you in a court of law
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