tuscl

Why Do Strippers Do What They Do?

davids
Ok, I know most dancers have a cover story something like "oh, i'm a medical student with another job and i just do this for a little extra cash because it's fun and I like meeting new people". But what's the reason you think most of the girls are "dancing"? I suspect most are in some bad situation and desperate for cash: single mothers, drug, alcohol or gambling addicts or they don't have a decent amount of education and aren't highly motivated by career ambitions.

Now I know some of you are going to try and prove me wrong by saying " I knew this one stripper who really was a law student because I later hired here when she started practicing" at the same time you fail to mention the 92 others who do meet my criteria. Again I am interested in averages here not exceptions.

Also, if I am right, does getting a "dance" from women in desperate situations who don't really like what they are doing turn you on? Do you even care? Do you find the more desperate the situation the woman is the more willing she is to do "extras"? Does that bother you?

28 comments

  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    Danton, I think most people in any field are doing something for money that they'd rather not be doing, no matter what field you're talking about. That's called life.
  • Danton
    •
    20 years ago
    It bothers me if the dancers are doing something they really don't want to do only for the money. A turn-on in any situation is meeting someone who is having fun with their job. In areas where the social climate is accepting of the profession, you have dancers who are more "normal" and fewer immigrants who are "forced" into it IMHO.
  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    I've met a surprising number of dancers who told me that their mother had also been a dancer. My ATF worked in a club where her mother had worked for years as a waitress and the mother's best friend was the manager, and when she was in her early teens one of the club's strippers lived with them (and introduced her to drugs.) I know of a mother and daughter who dance together (and you have to look really closely to figure out which is which.) A lot of these girls grow up in families where other family members or friends are or were strippers, and it's no different to them than a son getting a job at the factory where their father or uncle worked.
  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    To return to the original question, I think we all agree that almost all dancers do what they do because they think they can make more money dancing that they can doing anything else. But I have met a few who I think would dance even if the pay was terrible, they love to dance, they find it glamorous, they think they're in show business. Usually these girls aren't very bright and it's kind of sad. Ever met any like that?
  • Kyle1111
    •
    20 years ago
    Hi Shekitout,

    Some people actually care about other people besides their immediate friends and loved ones.


  • Shekitout
    •
    20 years ago
    Hey Shadowcat you y9urself said y9ou don't care why they do what they do as long as you're having fun so that was my point-who gives a shit why they do it-it's none of your or my business.
  • TopGunGlen
    •
    20 years ago
    To make the money they probably can't make at most other jobs. Especially considering most strippers are young and have not finished college. Davids seems to think that only women who he considers "damaged goods" would be strippers. Not so at all. I have met many people from all walks of life, and all of us have issues with our past. What is wrong with a beautiful woman making money with her looks and sexuality?
  • casualguy
    •
    20 years ago
    I know why strippers do what they do. You see way back in elementary school they had a guest speaker come in and talk about what kind of career would be good for them. You can read about it all right here.

    http://www.thecarolinachannel.com/educat…

    Just highlight the above with with cursor, press control and the letter c at the same time to copy and then control and the letter v (same time) with the cursor already at the address box to paste the address.
  • cardsfan
    •
    20 years ago
    Uhh, all in all this is really a VERY stupid question if you think about it. Why do YOU go to work and do what you do?? I do it to make money and pay my bills. Whats the difference if you go flip buurgers for $6 an hour or get naked for $200?? Gee? Thats a tough one... I bet you can go find a women who flip burgers and do all kinds of nasty things at her local bar too while she blows her whole paycheck getting tweaked. I'll bet you can find a Stripper who who socks away 40% or more of her income for an education fund for her child or her own retirement. My point is it takes ALL KINDS in ALL JOBS and there are plenty of smart people and plenty of stupid people in EVERY profession, not just strippers.

    Oh, plus I am sure you can find plenty of burger flippers who despise their customers too (rolls eyes).
  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    Yoda, that's been my experience too. My ATF is from the most screwed-up background that you can imagine - her mother and father were never married to each other, almost everyone in her family is a drug addict or alcoholic, her boyfriend was a drug dealer, her mother is on welfare, several of her brothers have been in jail, and she was helping to support the whole group when she danced. But she has three things that none of ther rest of them have: a winning personality, a high degree of motivation to better herself, and a high level of intelligence. She's a truly remarkable girl. And I too have been surprised at how strong her morals are. Now that she's matured a bit, she's at least as moral as most girls her age. And I care very much about this sort of thing - I'm very interested in helping a girl who is willing to help herself, but I'm not at all interested in feeding some unmotivated girl's drug habit. It makes a big difference to me. When I go clubbing, I'm always looking for that diamond in the rough, or what I think of as "a bird with broken wing." I even wrote a poem called that once.
  • Yoda
    •
    20 years ago
    The interesting thing is that most of the dancers I have met where not "bad" girls at all. They started dancing - and kept at - it because the money was good. With the divorce rate hovering around 50% for the last couple of decades I'd wager that many of us come from broken homes with little or no parental support. In fact, many dancers end up helping their families. I know a lot of dancers who certainly enjoy the lifestyle that all of that cash can bring but just as many work hard to pay the bills for sometimes 2 or 3 generations of their families. The one thing I do believe based on my experience is that loose morals or a promiscuous attitude are not all that common with the dancers I have met-at least no more common than with many non-dancers in their early 20's. Most of these women dawn a persona when they are at work and leave that persona in the dressing room when they go home.
  • Kyle1111
    •
    20 years ago

    Some people care if the consumer consumables they purchase are made by child labor or slave labor or communists.

    Who knows and who cares why Davids needed to ask the question to start with?

    He may consider it his business NOT to feed off of the misery of others. He may consider it his business to become an educated consumer. He may consider it his business to learn about how other strip club customers feel about the subject and to if necessary urge them to modify their behaviour. Etc. Etc. Etc.

    To those customers who do NOT care and just want to enjoy the benefits that strippers provide and have FUN, I would ask if they care about other members of society who might be being victimized? Do you care about the drug addict? Do you care about the abused child? Do you care about the innocent man rotting behind bars? Do you care about the little old lady who is swindled? Do you care about the little old man who is forced from his home because of rising prices he can't afford?


    I lean heavily toward NOT caring. Every dog or bitch for themselves. The other person is just there for your pleasure or profit.








  • Shekitout
    •
    20 years ago
    Who really gives a shit why strippers do what they do as long as they keep doing it? Why does davids need to ask the question to start with? What damn business is it of his-or mine?
  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    Superdude, I don't think most dancers play the hard-luck card. I've known many strippers who's family situation never surfaced until I got to know them really well. In fact they tried to hide it because they were ashamed of their background. I agree with your statement of why some girls dance. I also think the fact that many were raised with little or no parental supervision meant that they didn't have the bias against stripping that would exist in a "good" home, and that probably made it easier for them to become strippers.
  • SuperDude
    •
    20 years ago
    In this sexually repressed society, stripping is regarded as something only a "bad' girl would do. She is typecast as willing to do something "bad" because of a traumatic childhood or desperate financial conditions as an adult. We never seem to consider that there are some strippers and porn stars that like what they do because of (1) money; (2) travel; (3) meeting some interesting men in an environment that gives them some control in developing a relationship, if that is desirable; (4) a desire to tease and please men, reducing even the most powerful and wealthy into spineless jellyfish begging for more; (5) the thrill of being a "bad" girl, almost like riding with an outlaw biker gang without the exposure to real danger; (6) they like imitation sex and running around naked in front of men. I have heard so many hard luck stories from dancers begging for money that I am beginning to believe that some of this stuff is made up to get money. Some dancers are married, have "normal" relationships with "straight" boyfriends and day jobs in medical or law offices. If the customer knows this, will he tip, help out or ask for more dances? Probably not. We are played for suckers by this helpless damsel in distress routine, because they know that it's the best and easiest card to play. The next card is the struggling student. Last night I was struck dumb when a dancer said " I enjoy being here to please you. I have no hard luck story to tell."
  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    To return to the original question, I've found that a lot of strippers come from broken homes and don't get any parental support. For example, my ATF has been self-supporting and largely on her own since she was 15. She tried waitressing and several other jobs for awhile but couldn't make enough to support herself. She had friends who were strippers and they encouraged her to try it. She found that she could make more money and not have to work as hard. Young women with limited job skills and no parental support have few options in our society. They used to be able to get good secretarial jobs but today those jobs usually require at least 2 years of college. I'd guess that most young strippers tried waitressing first, which is one of their few options, but found they couldn't make enought to support themselves. I totally agree with Yoda that most of these girls would quit dancing in a minute if they could make as much elsewhere.
  • Kyle1111
    •
    20 years ago

    Could be as simple as his upbringing or his code of right v. wrong. Some people don't like to feed off of other people's misery no matter how profitable or enjoyable. So if he believes these young women are basically being forced to sell their bodies it might be a real battle of conscience for him.


  • Mouse
    •
    20 years ago
    Davids, why is this such an issue for you? There must be a story behind it. Would you be willing to share it with us?
  • johnnylingo
    •
    20 years ago
    I don't doubt that at all. Even when I heard my ex-porn star with the golden heart talk in LA, you could tell that while she probably felt genuinely perturbed about gender relations, she also felt pity for the individuals for falling into the trap of coming to a club, expecting too much, and wasting their money. I'm sure a dancer with less money and less experience would put it more bluntly.
  • davids
    •
    20 years ago
    Having someone pick up your garbage is not supposed to be a turnon.

    This has been a good thread: shows to me another reaons why strippers have such contempt for their customers and hence themselves.
  • davids
    •
    20 years ago
    johnny: you should try to talking to strippers after you get to know them better and they aren't putting on so much of an act. Then you will find that they really do despise their jobs (and their customers).
  • davids
    •
    20 years ago
    shadowcat: what if she was doing prostitution because she was sexually abused as a child? would that change your mind? (Let's see how you try and change the subject here: "Actually I've talked to strippers who own rather crappy cards.")
  • Yoda
    •
    20 years ago
    There are as many reasons for dancing as there are dancers. It doesn't really matter to me why they dance. I think you will find that most of them would stop if they could make the same money doing something else.
    There are some on this board who would argue that, if you start worrying too much about why they are their, you run the risk of getting to involved.
    I'm not one of those who thinks like that but it is a valid reason for being cautious about asking the question.
  • Yoda
    •
    20 years ago
    oopss, sorry, "There",not "their"
  • davids
    •
    20 years ago
    "Being open and honest with strippers has always paid off for me."

    Well FONDL and shadowcat certainly know how to change the subject don't they?
  • johnnylingo
    •
    20 years ago
    The trouble that their in may not necessarily be due to anything illegal. I have plenty of friends who are in debt 10K - 50K (combination of student loans, credit cards, or bad investments). They pay hundreds each month on the interest alone, and when you're young and don't have money in the family, there aren't many options available for recovering. Others might not necessarily be in debt but can't find or hold down a good job and have to live week by week barely able to pay bills.

    There was a special on porn stars on HBO last night (can't remember the name, sorry) and when asked why the female stars started, all cited desperate need for money due to above reasons, or just the desire to be financially independent doing something they didn't have a huge problem with.
  • FONDL
    •
    20 years ago
    I agree with Shadowcat - being open and honest has always worked for me. I find that, like most people in general, a stripper will usually treat you pretty much the way you treat her. When I find a girl I like, I always try to treat her as a friend, and I've found that she will usually do the same. If I don't bullshit her, she usually won't try to bullshit me. As for why they dance, I think most of them dance because with their skills (or lack thereof) they can make more money dancing than doing anything else. And you can't generalize much beyond that.
  • DandyDan
    •
    20 years ago
    I work with a woman who used to be a stripper. She knows I love going to stripclubs and we have had a few discussions about them. She said the only reason she became one was because she needed the money after she lost her job. Whether I would have ever gotten a dance from her, I don't know, but I generally don't care about what the girls situation is, although if it's obvious she's lying, I won't give her a second thought.
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