If a dancer starts making you feel slightly uncomfortable after 20 to 30 minutes

I guess I wasn't that uncomfortable if I came close to falling asleep with the second dancer who sat on my lap.

Just say your leg's going to sleep.

If she looks like she weighs more than 110 lbs., tell her you have very bad circulation. Don't want to risk anyone getting anorexia.

#1

Same as if they sit on my wallet or keys (can be the worst) and it's not comfortable.

Ask her to shift her position when it gets uncomfortable.

Besides being a student of boobology, I've learned a few things about legs as they relate to dancers in strip clubs. For me, the most comfortable position to have a dancer sit my lap is where her butt is directly centered between my legs. If her weight is directly on one leg, then her weight gets transferred down to the femur, and that can get sore quickly (depending on her weight). If she sits centered in my lap, the weight isn't transferred to the femur. It's simply absorbed within the flesh of the inner thighs.

Makes sense, it just is harder to see her if she is sitting almost right on top of you. It can feel better though. :)

Most dancers do not seem to sit longer than 15 minutes on my lap though so I often don't think about it. If they do, they are often distracting me in other ways.

Switch legs.

The first option

I had this happen at Spearmint Rhino in Las Vegas when this lovely blonde sat on my lap for slightly over an hour. After the first 30 minutes, she had to sit in another spot because my leg was cramping up/falling asleep.

I love when dancers sit on my lap, especially when they take the initiative to do it and I don't have to ask for it. But that usually doesn't happen. Most of the times I have to request it.

Sometimes dancers will sit on your lap when they first approach you to try to entice you into getting a dance. But it just doesn't seem like it happens that often, at least not in my experience.

Pull her thong to the side and stick you finger in her asshole. Bet she'll switch positions pdq.

Call Bob's wrecker service

Fart

I usually get more uncomfortable with skinny dancers. They don't have much padding back there and their bones hurt after a while

Shark... when you fall asleep with a dancer on your lap or she falls asleep on your lap do you ever say she was sleeping with you?

Stand up.

Complain to the bouncer. :)

You could ask her to get on her knees.

What Corvus said.

Can't say I've ever had that happen. I've had a few sit on my keys but that's always uncomfortable for them too so they jump up and we adjust.

How big are these broads that they're crushing you like that? You might need to talk to their hiring manager and have them fix the problem at the source.

If I like having her close to me; I’ll ask her to switch legs – but more often than not I’ll ask her to take a seat next to me.

That depends on which club I'm at. One of my regular clubs would never have that happen because they are not supposed to sit in anyone's lap. They have to have their own chair. I think that's a dumb rule, but that's just the way it is there. I suppose it depends on what your seating arrangment is. If it's a standard chair, usually, I just have them switch legs, but if it's like my favorite club and I'm on a couch, then she just ends up on the other half of the couch.

Certain chairs don't have much cushion left. As an experiment someone could put a 120 pound weight on one leg while sitting on a kitchen chair and see if it becomes uncomfortable after 30 minutes if you doubt me.

To encourage a dancer to sit in my lap, I'll sometimes say, "Care to share a chair?" while I'm holding my arms out. (They get the hint right away.) It's the environmentally sensitive way to conserve strip club furniture. Why wear out two chairs when you only need one?