How long are you willing to wait for you ATF to join you?

I dumped a regular not too long ago who started to get in the habit of keeping me waiting.

I've burned up too much time over the years waiting for a dancer to get back to me. I don't wait for anyone any longer than it takes to walk from one side of the open floor over to where I am. It's basically the bus theory...Ms. Right is trumped by Ms Right Now.

As usual, Shadowcat is right. You don't own them, they don't own you. If either of you begin to think otherwise, it's time to move on.

Some of them will get jeolous if they see you buying a number of dances from other girls. I had that experience about 3months ago. The dancer wasn't a ATF but more of just my favorite dancer at that particular club. She had spoke to me when I came in but didn't really sit and chat with me.

The club was pretty much slow so of course other girls came to talk. I sent some of them away but after a while I said the heck with it I might as well talk to someone since I am alone. I think I had gotten about 3 tabledances when Lyric whom was sitting with another gentleman threw her keys at me. She said "Hey what are you doing?" I said well you are sitting with that guy?" She was like I was just trying to give you some time to get comfortable. I said okay? More time went by. After getting a lapdance from this other dancer I started to head out the door. I ran into Lyric. She was kind of pissed that I didn't get a dance from her. I told her that I was heading out and would see her the next time. There hasn't been a next time. I may not ever go back.

If after 30 min. no one else appeals to you then leave for club "B"

I will wait 15-20, 30 minutres max. If when I get to a club I don't see my fave I will ask the waitress that gets my first drink if she is working, if she says she is "in VIP with another customer I will tip her to go and tell her (the fave) I am here, one club my favorite waitress would do it automatically.

I am with Davids in general, if you prove to your fave that you are willing to wait and wait, an hour or more, too many dancers than rather than being appreciative will lokk at you as some kind of PL and will let you wait until they have exhausted all there other prospects for money in the room because tehy know that they can always get to you later, even to the point of, after finnally getting done with whoever they are with coming over and saying that some other customer (maybe a PL like you) has been waiting and she "promised" him that he would be next. "but I will get to you soon" and then maybe you are waiting another half hour, then it's "well I have to go on stage". Tick Tock

Started down that road once eons ago, didn't like it.

I don't tell this to the dancers, but I think it's really funny watching the dancers walking around a club wondering where I moved to.

I might favor a few dancers over others but I certainly don't wait on them. If a favorite dancer wants to find me, she can walk around the club until she finds me. It may be difficult though because I may be in the back room getting a dance from someone else. How long I stay in a club depends on a few factors like how much fun I am having and/or if I get hungry and want to go eat something. If I'm not having fun or get hungry, it's just tough luck if a dancer wanted to get a dance from me. I've noticed dancers and even waitresses have been quicker around me when I left early or got a drink myself.

You don't save a spot for your ATF.

If she's not going to drop whoever she's with to be with you, then either she doesn't really think much of you to begin with, or he's a better regular than you are. Maybe both.

It's up to you though. If your ATF means that much to you, then you'll be willing to put up with her BS. This is like when you see a woman hang around with a loser of a boyfriend who treats her like dogshit. You wonder why. Well, now you know.

I don't think your ATF should be expected to drop everything the minute you walk in. Remember, she is working there. She is not your girlfriend or wife.

I would expect that she will join you or at least acknowledge you within a reasonable time. In the meantime, just enjoy the show.

I don't think I have ever dropped enough money in a club for a dancer to drop whoever she is talking with and come right over to me. (Going home with me is another story...) I know they are there to make money. Why would I want to interfere with that? I'd rather she get her dances, make her money, and then spend time with me.

Don't wait. Move to the next dancer in your rotation. They are there to entertain you, not keep appointments or "dates."

FONDL: I agree wholeheartedly. I only have one club with a true favorite, but all the dancers there know that I prefer her, and will move along when she becomes available. I'll still get dances from other dancers, so it isn't a waste of their time to chat with me, but they know that she gets the majority of cash/attention.

Chandler, the place where my ATF worked was so small that the minute you walked through the door every girl in the place knew you were there. I was good friends with several of my ATF's friends, so if she was busy one of them would usually sit with me. Sometimes I'd even buy a couple of dances from one of them. But we all knew that as soon as my ATF was free that she would be joining me and they would move on. This stuff is pretty common in clubs, the girls have no trouble dealing with it. It's actually one of the nice things about having a fave, everyone knows it and accomodates it with no hard feelings on anyone's part.

You don't have to let her know you are waiting, she can tell the instant she sees you which is probably within a minute of you entering the club.

Now some crazy female behavior I've noticed is that women often pretend not to see you when they really have. It's kind of a stupid game: they want to see if you will approach them first or something. Not sure exactly why they do this (I doubt they understand either) but I found it so silly that they were pretending not to see me when they obviously had that I would just wait and then they would come over in time.

Anyway, make her do the work: she wants your money, so she should be working to get that spot next to you and being respectful of your time by not keeping you waiting.
Don't show any neediness.

Also do not make the mistake of thinking she will appreciate it if you just wait for her and brush off other women. Might seem nice in your mind, but she'll just interpret that as you being a pussy/PL. Not necessarily the correct interpretation, but women are crazy.

I don't wait specifically for my ATD. I tip the other girls and check out possible new favs. I usually reserve a certain amount of money that I plan on spending on my ATF. However, that doesn't mean I won't get dances from other girls while I wait.

Anyone who says you check out other girls while you wait: How do you do that while saving a spot for your ATF?

Anyone: Do you do anything to make sure your ATF knows your waiting for her? Or do you try to play nonchalant and not appear to be waiting?

Whenever my ATF was tied up with someone else and I arrived, the first thing she would do is excuse herself, come over to me to say hello, and tell me about how long she expected to be. If she wasn't willing to do that, she wouldn't have been my ATF. Then depending on how long it was going to be and who else was there, I'd do one of three things: sit and wait, spend a little time with another girl (typically one of my ATF's friends), or leave and come back later.

I don't really know, because usually she would come and sit and we'd talk within the first hour for sure. I'd say if you feel like leaving the club and you still haven't seen her, leave. I don't know if there is an exact time period, but if it feels proper to leave without seeing your ATF, do it.

I'll generally wait until she becomes available, but don't stay any longer than I had originally planned to. I stay busy tipping and talking. You never know when you're going to find that "diamond in the rough."

man, this is so friggin' obvious, if you can find other interesting things to do or others to get dances from then do it. if you are just waiting for her, then don't do it. she'll be there the next time you go back. hopefully you value your time and have other things to do beyond go to strip clubs (though I do wonder about the worst of the PLs here).

check out the other girls... that way you can have a plan "B" in the future.

JC: I'm asking you or anyone who says, with or without conditions, to not wait but leave.

chandler, I assume you're replying to davids, because my second sentence was "Get dances from someone else interesting."

30 min. max. In the meantime, will pursue other interesting prospects, any more than 30 mins is "VIP Hog", Sugar Daddy, or Whale. If other prospects maxed out, and no new stage rotation, time to bale and go to "Club B".

So, if your ATF dances for anyone else while you're in the club, leave immediately? Don't ever wait for ANY stripper you want to join you, or just your ATF?

OK, I may fall under PL/RIL category, but I am willing to wait and entertain myself with the site of attractive/naked women while waiting on a favorite. (The torture I put myself through!!) I don't normally rush into getting dances when I go to a club, so waiting for a favorite to become free doesn't bother me. I'll tip at the rail, chat with other dancers, and have a drink while waiting.

Don't wait for her. Get dances from someone else interesting. If there's no one else around that fits that bill, leave.

She won't ever get jealous or cry to you about leaving her though. She might pretend if she thinks you'll fall for it though.

Don't wait at all. Sets a very bad precedent. Capitalize on the oppurtunity to buy dances from another girl to breed JEALOUSY. If there are no other girls there worth buying dances from and you can't think of anything else to do: then leave. This should all be obvious. If you do follow these rules you will find she will be more respectful of your time in the future. If she cries to you about it then make fun of her for being such a baby.
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When I had an ATF we had a regular meeting time every Saturday afternoon. If she was busy I would wait. The longest may have been an hour once or twice but I used to got to the club all the time and had plenty of ladies to keep me company. I generally devote an entire afternoon to my visits. I'm very patient if a fav is having a good day. Patience pays off.