Joke of the day

gawker
Older than dirt

Paddy is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny
mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top
of her thighs. To his delight, he realizes she has gone out without
underwear.

The blonde realizes he is staring and inquires,
"Are you looking at my vagina?"
"Yes, I'm sorry," Paddy replies and promises to avert his eyes.

"It's quite all right," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll
make it blow a kiss to you."

Sure enough the vagina blows him a kiss.
Paddy, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the wonder
vagina can do.

"I can also make it wink," says the woman.
Paddy stares in amazement as the vagina winks at him.

"Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat.
Paddy moves over and she smiles and asks,
"Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?"


Stunned, Paddy replies, "You're kidding—you mean it can whistle, too?”

10 comments

  • gawker
    11 years ago
    Bottle of Merlot
    A Man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually
    attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant.

    So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from
    the gentleman who is seated over there'..... and indicated the sender
    with a nod of his head.

    She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at
    the man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note. The
    waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from
    her and conveyed it to the gentleman.

    The note read:'For me to accept this bottle, you need to
    have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank
    and 7 inches in your pants'..


    After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of
    his own in return. He folded the note, handed it to the waiter
    and instructed him to deliver it to the lady.

    It read:
    'Just to let you know things aren't always what they appear to
    be, I have a Ferrari Maranello, BMW Z8, Mercedes CL600, and
    a Porsche Turbo in my several garages; I have beautiful homes
    in Aspen and Miami , and a 10,000 acre ranch in Louisiana . There
    is over twenty million dollars in my bank account and portfolio. But,
    not even for a woman as beautiful as you, would I cut off three
    inches. Just send the wine back.'


  • Dougster
    11 years ago
    Joke of the day - BonedBrother:

    https://www.tuscl.net/u.php?UID=276599

  • crazyjoe
    11 years ago
    Lol dougster. Bonerbreath is hilarious
  • tumblingdice
    11 years ago
    LMFAO-Bonedbybrother.
  • Dougster
    11 years ago
    Good one, dice!
  • JuiceBox69
    11 years ago
    Lol fucking lol
  • Club_Goer_Seattle
    11 years ago
    The joke threads are the best posts in recent weeks on TUSCL !
  • Bonesbrother
    11 years ago
    I'm happy to know that my comments are being read and that I got my point across. Now you morons can get back to your circle jerk.
  • bigman226
    11 years ago
    A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.
  • sharkhunter
    11 years ago
    Good jokes. Thanks guys!
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