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20 years ago

How do you tell their ages?

I'm terrible at judging girls ages, at least until I get to know them a bit. A couple of weeks ago I was at a play and there were 2 fairly attractive young girls in the cast - I guessed one of them to be about 13, the other maybe 18. Later when I read the program I discovered that the one I thought was about 13 was a college graduate and teacher, and the one I thought was older was 13. I've seen lots of girls 15 or less who could easily pass as 18 in a strip club. How do we know?

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Avatar for FONDL
FONDL

I don't think I would coach either sex in today's environment, or take on any other responsibility where I was ever alone with a young person. If you're ever accused of misbehavior, you're assumed to be guilty until proven innocent, which is impossible. I'm sure there are many men on the sex offender lists who haven't done anything wrong. I'm also sure that there are men who have gotten in trouble with a young girl where she initiated it. Years ago such things would have been dealt quietly and with sensitivity. Not today.

Avatar for chitownlawyer
chitownlawyer

I believe the age of consent in Mississippi is fourteen. Until it was too late, I didn't learn of the "boyfriend" exception in my state--statutory rape laws do not apply if there is less than a five year difference in the ages of the parties. So a 19 year old guy can screw a fifteen year old, and not be on the hook for statutory rape (of course, he still could be good for actual rape, if the facts so indicate, plus the variety of misdemeanors set out above.) Basically, the law is not going to get involved in backseat fights between young lovers.

All bets are off if the perpetrator is in a position of authority over the victim...babysitter, school teacher, coach, etc. In those circumstances, the statutory rape law applies full-on.

I agree with FONDL that having anything to do with teenaged girls is too dangerous now.

Avatar for AbbieNormal
AbbieNormal

FONDL, 18 is nationalized in a sense because of pornography. I'm sure that Chitown could cite how it happened, but essentially 18 came to be nationally accepted as when you could make "adult" decisions because of the draft, voting rights, and a few other things. As I recall it first came up with Playboy when a 17 yo playmate posed (with parental consent), but since Playboy was distributed via mail throughout the country it became a federal case. If you recall the case of porn star Tracy Lords (who made most of her movies between 16 and 18) her movies became child pornography overnight. Age of consent is different, and in fact in Europe where countries have unified age of consent laws as opposed to our varied state ones many of Ms. Lords' movies are still legal and 16 yo porn stars happen.

Avatar for FONDL
FONDL

Chitown, I wasn't aware that the age of consent differed from state to state. I thought it was 18 everywhere in the US.

Many years ago I coached several youth sports teams. One of the girls I coached was as provocative and attractive as any woman I have ever seen anywhere. She was 13. I stopped coaching girls teams, it's too damn dangerous.

Avatar for ShotDisc
ShotDisc

I agree with shadow on this one. what is age really? just a number. if she does a good job, who cares.

Avatar for chitownlawyer
chitownlawyer

As a strictly legal matter, if I got caught in an illicit embrace with a 16 year old in my state (or in the state in which Favorite Club is located), I could be charged with a number of misdemeanors, including contributing to the delinquency of a minor, indecent liberties, or disorderly conduct (The age of consent in both states is 16). If convicted of the second, I would definitely end up on the sex offender list. I would likely be OK on the first and third charges, depending on the factual stipulations that I enter into with the State (and this IS NOT one I go to trial on). However, the reality of the situation is that a club is likely a bigger target than me, especially since I think that clubs are raided primarily because the authorities believe that they can make drug charges. They would also be a bigger target on the girl, since they could go down for pandering, white slavery, Mann Act violation, etc. (if it happened at a local club, where a lot of the girls come across the state line). Therefore, the most likely scenario is that I rat out the club management, and they let me go, probably with a requirement that I have to go to the STD classes that they send johns to.

Another aspect of reality--if that happened to me, the professional and family implications would be far greater than the legal issues. Since the girl in your example is over the age of consent, the most I could do, worst case scenario, is a year in the county jail. My problem would be handling my wife after my sentence was over, and I didn't have the jail staff to protect me any longer.

Avatar for FONDL
FONDL

Chitown, just out of curiousity, what would happen if a club got raided and they found you and a 16 yo locked in an illegal embrace? Could you successfully argue that it's the club's problem and not yours? Or would you make the sex-offender list? I agree that I really don't much care what the girl's age is except for the legal implications. But that does concern me because I've seen way too many 13 yo girls who can easily pass for 18, especially in the dimly lit environment of the typical strip club.

Avatar for minnow
minnow

How do I tell how many miles a used car has? How has it been driven & taken care of? In either case, as long as mileage is good & I getr taken to where I want to go, whats the difference?

Avatar for chitownlawyer
chitownlawyer

Like most of the posters here, I take a functional view toward the age of dancers....as long as I enjoy the show, I'm not concerned with the number. As far as the bottom of the range goes, I have only encountered a couple of dancers whose apparent youth raised questions of whether they were old enough to dance, and I figure that is the club's problem. At the upper end of the range, I have seen dancers who have become a little "matronly", but some of them have been the best dancers I have encountered.

In terms of qualitative indicators of age, it's just like Mother told me...look at the hands and neck.

Avatar for chandler
chandler

A good way to find out if she's 18 is to make a porn movie with her. If you get arrested, she must not be 18. I guess this isn't much different from the R. Kelly method.

Avatar for Clubber
Clubber

I am terrible at guessing age. Most times I've inquired, I've been way off. On those occasions, when the dancer has known me for some time, they've shown me there drivers license to prove their age. In the long run, as long as they are working, it is up to the club to verify that they are legal to dance.

Avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan

I don't know and I'm not sure I really care. If they look young, I just assume they're 18. When they get to be about 30, though, that's when I begin to not be able to tell.

Avatar for casualguy
casualguy

I break the stripper ages down as follows:

  1. Very young looking like she just got out of high school.

  2. Young and pretty but looks like she could be in college.

  3. Good looking and looks like she may be getting close to my age.

  4. Looks older than me but what do I care if she still looks good and can dance.

Avatar for JC2003
JC2003

There's no way that you can judge someone's age if they're on stage especially if they're wearing lots of stage makeup.

Avatar for Yoda
Yoda

Ask them

Avatar for chandler
chandler

If you want to find out her real age, it's better to ask somebody who doesn't like her.

Avatar for parodyman-->
parodyman-->

Cut them in half and count the rings? -- Sorry FONDL I couldn't resist.

I struggle with the age thing too. Sometimes it's hard to tell.

Oh well as our friend R. Kelly says, "Piss on em."

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