Sugar Baby vs ATF

avatar for MondoGoGo
MondoGoGo
About 5 years ago my ATF decided that she wanted to get preggers so she married her SO and moved on (I haven't heard from or seen her since so I assume that she's still out of circulation). Shortly after that another dancer that had just joined the scene and had serious potential to become my ATF asked me if I would be interested in a different kind of arrangement than I was used to. She told me that prior to becoming a dancer she was a Sugar Baby for this dude who helped her out financially in return for sexual favors and a GFE. We talked about it over the course of a couple weeks and I decided to pass but the concept resonated with me at the time so I did some research and joined a couple sites to explore my options.

After about 6 months of fucking around, trolling for girls and interviewing prospects I settled on this super cute 20yo undergrad going to G'Town who wanted to be a Lawyer. She was young, beautiful, vivacious, petite, intelligent and most of all motivated. She was determined to fulfill her dream to become a lawyer and even though she worked 2 part time jobs she was still cash strapped so I entered the picture as a funding source in exchange for services rendered.

The relationship lasted a little over 2 years and during that time my clubbing activity trailed off noticeably but I didn't really miss it to be honest with you and I was was having a great time in and out of bed with my little co-ed SB. Our relationship finally came to an end when she graduated and got accepted to Yale for her post-grad work so she trundled off to New Haven and very likely another SD in that neck of the woods.

So the question is have you had or even considered the Sugar Baby experience as opposed to maintaining an ATF at a club? If so how do they compare in your opinion?

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avatar for Lionshare
Lionshare
12 years ago
I am currently looking into a sugar baby, I feel like it would fit my lifestyle better. I give her a certain amount per month, and I use her for eye.candy and such while I am on my boat and such. Win win
avatar for TcVegas
TcVegas
12 years ago
That sounds pretty awesome. Where/how did you actually find someone? This sounds way better than an club.

"After about 6 months of fucking around, trolling for girls and interviewing prospects I settled on this super cute 20yo undergrad going to G'Town who wanted to be a Lawyer."
avatar for MondoGoGo
MondoGoGo
12 years ago
There are a bunch of sites that act as clearing houses for SD's and/or SB's looking to connect.

sugardaddyforme.com
sugardaddie.com
sugarbaby4u.com
mutualarrangements.com
ashlymadison.com
datesugardaddy.com

The list goes on and on. If you hit google with sugardaddy or sugarbaby you'll get lots of hits.

Be aware though that as is the case with pretty much everything these days 90% of what you find will be worthless crap and getting to the 10% requires effort. I probably interviewed 20 girls and had to expand my geography to the whole Mid-Atlantic before I found Becca (my SB) who just happened to be in my backyard. In the end it was worth it but major emphasis on the caveat emptor if your going to take a run at it IMHO...
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
"Be aware though that as is the case with pretty much everything these days 90% of what you find will be worthless crap and getting to the 10% requires effort. I probably interviewed 20 girls and had to expand my geography to the whole Mid-Atlantic before I found Becca (my SB) who just happened to be in my backyard. In the end it was worth it but major emphasis on the caveat emptor if your going to take a run at it IMHO..."

Was this "relationship" like an ongoing OTC "business relationship"? WAS it emotionless? Were you just mere acquaintances, friends, GOOD friends, Lovers?
avatar for TcVegas
TcVegas
12 years ago
Thanks MondoGoGo
avatar for jester214
jester214
12 years ago
I see the attraction but have little interest though I realize my situation is not the norm.
avatar for MondoGoGo
MondoGoGo
12 years ago
@ Alucard, Like pretty much all relationships it was complex. I was physically attracted to her and she was, well, physically attracted to...

...my money!

But over time it transcended its pay for service roots and became more of a friends with benefits relationship. Additionally she confessed that she came to count on my advice and considered me a mentor regarding interpersonal relationships and human relations (my area of expertise) so I guess that would have to be counted as yet another dimension of the relationship.

Neither of us fell in "love" with the other and as a matter of fact she had several (2 or 3) boyfriends over the course of the 2 years we were an item. One of them actually knew about our arrangement and was cool with it. She was a very focused young lady and I appreciated the fact that over the course of the relationship we were both able to maintain our individual lives apart and I never felt any pressure from her for more money, more time, or more emotional investment.

That having been said our physical relationship was sublime and she was an incredible sex partner. As a young woman who genuinely enjoyed the carnal pleasures of the flesh she was open to experimentation and we had many adventures together. The most intense came when she expressed an interest in bondage and submission but that, as they say, is another story.

We stayed in touch for 5 or 6 months after she moved to Connecticut but she was super busy working on her degree and she hooked up with one of her prof's fairly soon after the move so the writing on the wall was pretty clear that our time had come to an end. I think about her from time to time but I don't dwell on it because the river flows ever forward and there are still many adventures waiting for me down stream.
avatar for duomaxwell
duomaxwell
12 years ago
Sometimes I think that having a SD would be cool, but only if we gave each other a wide berth.
avatar for mjx01
mjx01
12 years ago
Would I consider a SB setup? yes.

Could I afford a SB setup? Unlikely.

Would I have willingly gone into the poor house for my xATF if she was willing to go the SB route? Absolutely. (Dodges a bullet there.)

Like anything in life, both pros and cons to any arrangement.
avatar for mausercat
mausercat
12 years ago
There are two nationwide search firms with deceptively similar names: Seeking Arrangements and Arrangement Finders. The first is a more established firm, based in Toronto. The latter is a little more blatant in their advertising and employs my All Time Dream Girl, actress Bree Olson, as their spokeswoman. The main difference is that on Seeking Arrangements the ladies state how much they are looking for as a monthly allowance. SA seems a bit more discreet than AF. Since the qualification for Sugar Daddy seems to be having some money, and since I spend my substance on cat food, I probably would not be an interesting prospect.
avatar for MondoGoGo
MondoGoGo
12 years ago
MMmmmmm I'd love to give you a "wide birth" @ duo...{wink}
avatar for Cable
Cable
12 years ago
I have had a relationship morph from a SC ATF to a SB/SD situation over the last five years or so. I maintain a secondary residence at the beach where we get together 2-3x per month. Mutually beneficial with no emotional drama involved. We'll see how long it lasts...
avatar for steve3003
steve3003
12 years ago
Georgetown followed by Yale... really? :-) Maybe it's the exception that proves the rule but it sure sounds like fantasy land.
avatar for SlickSpic
SlickSpic
12 years ago
Great topic. Once again, Bullwinkle hits the nail on the head. Question. Being in my mid-thirty's, am I too young to have a Sugar Baby? I have a career and side hustle, so I'm sure I can afford it. Don't have a second home, though. Funny thing is, I look young enough to still pull college pussy. In fact, for a few years, I'd take shit classes at the local JC just to hook up with some young tenders.
avatar for joewebber
joewebber
12 years ago
sugardaddy.com has mostly 18 and 20 year old girls looking for a 25 year old sugardaddy. yeah, right!
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
12 years ago
I've had my share of sugar babies but the relationships rarely end well. Most of my "kittens" either got complacent or expected waaaay too much, either financially or emotionally. Or I simply got bored with them after awhile. Nowadays I prefer the random simplicity and short term arrangement that stripclubs provide.
avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice
12 years ago
Slick,I did the same thing at a local JC,but I added a borrowed puppy.
avatar for gatorfan
gatorfan
12 years ago
I'm looking for a sugar foster kid. Let the state pay for it.
avatar for MondoGoGo
MondoGoGo
12 years ago
^Bwahahaha @ gator. Let me know how that goes I may follow your lead...
avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005
12 years ago
I'd love to have a sugar baby but for the very reasons that lopaw mentioned I don't think I ever would. It would also be quite a bit more expensive than a SC visit. I will stick with ITC and occasional OTC activities.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
"and I never felt any pressure from her for more money"

This is difficult, if not impossible to believe.
avatar for MondoGoGo
MondoGoGo
12 years ago
^believe whatever suits you @ Alucard and thanks for the insightful comment.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
12 years ago
@Duo I think if you really wanted one you'd already have one. Did you have a certain monthly amount in mind?
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
12 years ago
I've spent almost the last three years in such a relationship. It was good. Better than trolling the clubs, to be honest, even though I still did that occasionally.

Sadly, it's done now; her boyfriend asked her to marry him, and she doesn't want to continue. She did give me one final overnight fling, free of charge, but I'm not convinced it helped.

I can only hope he turns out to be as big a douchebag as I think he is, and she comes crying back. :)
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