The Case of the Missing Stripper

jackslash
Detroit strip clubs
I'm faced with a mystery. When I left my home this morning, a stripper was asleep in my bed. When I returned, she had disappeared.

I had left her sleeping peacefully at 7AM, and when I called around 1PM, she was still in bed and sounded groggy. I told her I would be back by 5:30 to drive her home.

But when I pulled into my garage and walked upstairs calling "Christie," I heard no response. My bed was empty except for a tangle of sheets and blankets and a pair of pink and white panties. Where was she?

I searched the house. Her iPhone, purse and joints were gone. My iPad, MacBook and TV were still there, so she hadn't robbed me. Christie is my ATF and considering the amount of money I spend on her, it would be very short-sighted to rob me. Of course, strippers are often short-sighted.

She had not left a note. I found some dirty dishes in the sink, revealing she had eaten lunch. I checked the front door. The dead bolt was open but the spring lock was locked, so she had gone out that way. Someone must have picked her up.

I phoned her and texted her, but she has not responded.

So where is she? Lying drunk at home? Lying drunk in a motel? Lying dead in a Detroit drug house?

The mystery continues.










23 comments

Latest

JuiceBox69
12 years ago
Dude chill happens to me all the time....she is a zombie now
Club_Goer_Seattle
12 years ago
It's only been a day for you so far, so I wouldn't start drawing conclusions until you're actually able to talk to her about it.

Dancers are notorious for being unpredictable, unreliable, unconcerned about others, even the "hands that feed them." I had a former long-time fave show similar lack of concern when she felt it was time to kick me out of her life. If this were my situation, and she didn't have an adequate explanation, once I could speak with her, I'd just dump her and go on to another. I don't have any tolerance for flaky dancers.
Doc_Holliday
12 years ago
This happened to me with the second I ever fucked. Except around $350 out of my dresser and some DVDs/XBOX games also walked out the house.


I guess you could say I did pay one stripper for sex.
carolynne
12 years ago
ur just lucky u didn't come home and find her boyfriend asleep in ur bed with her.
Alucard
12 years ago
You're fortunate you weren't robbed. Where did she go? I suppose somewhere else where she'd much rather be.
Doc_Holliday
12 years ago
Shit I don't know if carolynne's boyfriend is dumb or just sweet, considering every week she claims a different regular's pad as her own...
Doc_Holliday
12 years ago
I mean, he has to wonder why she has both a beach house in Malibu and a trailer in Compton.
carolynne
12 years ago
huh???
motorhead
12 years ago
"I found some dirty dishes in the sink"

She ran out to Wal-Mart to get a bottle of Dawn.

She came back, but before she could do the dishes, she spied the Stueben crystal egg on your mantle. Proving the old adage, "you can take the stripper out of the club, but they will always be lying, thieving, whores", she took the egg and headed to the nearest pawn shop.

Moral of the story: buy a dishwasher




Alucard
12 years ago
Different moral - Don't leave a dancer alone in your home.
staxwell
12 years ago
Jacklash, I can decide who I want to be like more when I grow up, you or the Shadowcat.

That's some risky business, motor. Risky indeed.

Alucard, ...
jester214
12 years ago
I suggest you call the local authorities and inform them of this mystery, see what they can deduce.

Would make for an interesting phone call though.
crazyjoe
12 years ago
Jester... what the hell are you thinking?
lopaw
12 years ago
Have you checked behind the sofa?
Sometimes they roll back there.
staxwell
12 years ago
LOL lopaw
pabloantonio
12 years ago
My ATF once disappeared for 9 days. After frantically looking for her during those 9 days, I finally found her in a club on the other side of the city.

"I*******" I said, "Where have you been? I have been searching everywhere for you."

"Oh, I guess I forgot to call you." she said.

I had forgotten that dancers are like that, silly me.
TortillaChip
12 years ago
Jeezus Pablo, unless you go to clubs evernite a 9 day "disappearance" is hardly concerning. Almost makes you seem like a stalker...
tumblingdice
12 years ago
Crazy Janie and the mission man.
JohnBuford
12 years ago
Perhaps she "got the calling" and joined the convent.Her new name is Sister Mary Bambi.
jackslash
12 years ago
She finally texted me, and said her boyfriend picked her up. No explanation of why she didn't reply to my calls.

But if I want girls who are responsible, thoughtful and considerate, I should go to the library, not strip clubs.
mikeya02
12 years ago
Unlikely, but just hope she's not reported as missing and a detective comes to your door.
mikeya02
12 years ago
jack, missed your last post. oops!
ilbbaicnl
12 years ago
It's not unusual for strippers to have never had a normal job, and be too wrapped up in themselves to know most people can't get away with ditching work all the time. She may be pissed that you told her she had to wait till after work to get a ride.
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