Old age and treachery overcomes youth and skill

avatar for steve229
steve229
From a recent review:

"...a cute girl that Ive seen there before but never had the chance to spend any time with named Cassie was onstage so I rushed over to tip her for a little bit. As soon as I sat by the stage she came over and danced and flirted a little and it didnt take long for her "regular" to come over from the bar and start tipping her as well. Knowing the drill, I backed off and started sizing up the rest of the girls. Cassie, who is probably 20 or 21, went straight to the bar and started making out with the guy, who is at least 55-60. I was turned off by that..."

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avatar for looneylarry
looneylarry
14 years ago
Yeah, the writer was 50.
avatar for BaddJack
BaddJack
14 years ago
The guy Cassie was mashing on was me. I am pleased that the writer did not include how fat and bald I am, too.
avatar for CTQWERTY
CTQWERTY
14 years ago
Sounds like the Hip Hugger...
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
14 years ago
Dancers are free to hang with any regular and customers are free to choose the dancers they wish to favor with their time, attention or money. This is not high school dating.
avatar for potheadpl
potheadpl
14 years ago
Somebody had a daddy or an uncle who was too touchy-feely. LOL
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
14 years ago
I agree with SuperDude, that this is not high-school dating ... but ... but but ...

But, see, I go to strip clubs IN ORDER to find available girls. The LAST thing in the world that I would want, is to have a clear and present indicator that the girl isn't "interested" in me as a partner for the limited time I would pay for. I am a total failure at dating-mating-boys-meet-girls games in the REAL world, because they're too subtle. I never read the cues right, and I haven't learned to "dance the dance" the way we're "supposed to" (and, as an aside, I also suspect that the "dance" is generally set up in favor of the female and to the detriment of the male, but that's a different issue). I'm kind of "aspergers" about hooking up with people, and I HATE the fact that the real world puts such an onus of performance and bad-person good-person judgment onto the top of this whole mating ritual, such that the typical understanding is, that if you can't pick up girls, that's because you're a LOSER and therefore LESS WORTHWHILE AS A HUMAN. This is a downer, this whole system, for me.

So my visits to strip clubs are about AVOIDING that game, and instead being able to rely on the more straightforward indices of potential contact, and the more cut-and-dried systems of interaction: I am clean, decent, polite, intelligent, generally smart and humorous; I am willing to spend cash and to respect her limits. Therefore, I get some tits mashed up in my face. That's WHY I'm at a strip club. I know it's a fantasy, but it's one that I rely on, for my strip-clubbing benefits. Without that fantasy, without that straightforward cut-and-dried set of rules, strip-clubbing is just more of the real world with all of the real world's detriments, for me.

It brings me totally down, therefore, if I see a hot young female thang making out with someone -- whether or not the guy is an older gent -- and then showing interest in him in that real-world kind of way. He has "won" her according to the "dance" that I am very bad at dancing. All that I can naturally conclude is, that this gal has decided the guy is someone in whom she is interested in a way that I will never achieve. He doesn't resemble an asperger's sufferer; I do. I don't want the reminder.

Therefore, whereas it's true, as SuperDude says, that strip-clubs aren't high-school dating and any girl can hang with any guy she wants without having to suffer the censure of her onlookers, as long as she figures that she really likes the guy's company and he knows how to pick her up and get her to be with him; nevertheless, strip-clubs for me can also be BETTER than high-school dating because any girl can hang with me, and yet I DON'T KNOW HOW to pic her up and get her to be with me and make her figure that she really likes me.

I go to strip clubs in order to NOT be reminded that I can't get hot chicks to be my girlfriend. I am there because I can't get a hot chick in the real world, I fail in the competition with higher-achieving males and their "mojo" and "secret sauce" and "je ne sais quois" which evidently I will always lack, but despite these weaknesses in the real world, I can still PAY for a hot chick in the strip club. Therefore, probably the last thing in the world that I want at a strip club, is for some higher-achieving male to show me that he's landed a hot chick in the strip club, and for the hot chick in the strip club to start acting the way hot chicks in the real world act toward me and toward him.

Strippers? Do me a favor, gals: don't remind me that I'm a pathetic loser who can only get chicks by paying for them. Instead, please act like you like me despite the fact that the only way you'd ever meet is if I pay for your time in a strip club. Please do NOT act like you like some other guy even though he did NOT necessarily pay for your time in a strip club. If you find that he's so charming ya gotta make out with him? Don't do it in front of me in a strip club. Take him home with you, fuck him for real in the real world, and stop ruining my fully-paid-for fantasy.

Or give me my money back. :)

avatar for sinclair
sinclair
14 years ago
Good post, BookGuy.
avatar for clamheart
clamheart
14 years ago
Great synopsis, BookGuy. If the guy who's getting all the dancer's lavish attention is 20-30 years older than she (as is often the case in my experience), I just chock it up to his being a regular who tips well, or else he's her pimp. It is really aggravating if you're interested in some potentially quality time with the young lady. It's tough to ask her for a dance when she's standing between a guy's legs who's sitting on a stool and sucking face.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
14 years ago
He's turned off because a cute girl of 20 or 21 prefers an old guy of 55-60? That turns me on because I'm the old guy.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
14 years ago
That's why you don't "back off", but instead explicitly ask her for a dance. If she still gaffs you off, then drop her and move on. Otherwise you get to try her out. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

I've been the regular she comes back to when she gets off the stage, and it's not unusual for her to give someone a dance. 'Course, I'm not spending big money in the club, but outside, and she knows how to get the real money from me.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
14 years ago
I agree, Georgmicrodong. If I can't make the overt move, then I only have myself to blame. But still, even if it's not about one particular girl that I'm chasing after, I have to admit, I havve the instinctive response. If I see the girl treating a dude (ANY dude) as though he's real-world-desirable, rather than stripclub-world-desirable, then that shatters the foundations of my stripclub-world fantasy. I don't mean to be emotionally so brittle, but, again, that's a REASON that I'm at the stripclub in the first place: I'm there to GET AWAY FROM the threat to my ego which other, more successful men pose, and of which I'm reminded when other men seem to be more successful with hot women whom, otherwise, I would have a chance with.

I don't mean to DEFEND this attitude. It's really pretty lame, on my part. I can just SEE a few hot women enjoying themselves as customers at a strip club, and end up getting a depressed and downer feeling that lasts for the rest of the night. In fact, I make unnecessary assumptions about those women: I assume they're hot and desirable (I can't really see them all that well, and they aren't disrobing; and I certainly don't know what their behavior is like for the rest of the week); I assume that the men with them aren't getting cockteased, but actually are fucking them like crazed rabbits every chance possible; I assume they aren't paid escorts but instead are actual girlfriends of the men with them; I assume that I can't possibly have one of those women for myself; I assume that the whole problem is some kind of "system" in North American (I used to say, "the West," but now I'm thinking that parts of Europe aren't so fucked up as us) in which the dating-mating game is geared toward women "using" the men for relationship-destructive ego-boosts, despite women's supposed interest in a committed, long-term relationship with a caring, sensitive man; I assume ...

Oh I assume so much, when I make this wrong association. But it just "happens." And the only point I'd make about it, is, that a stripper can either use my fantasy for her benefit, or she can foolishly destroy my fragile fantasy, to the detriment of the earning power of EVERY girl in the club that night, by bringing her real-world-style hook-up methods into the strip club and showing them off.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
14 years ago
An escort service may be able to get you the girl you want without all of the angst.
avatar for joker44
joker44
14 years ago
Several years ago when I was regularly visiting evenings at Temptations in downtown KCMO I would see an old, fat guy sitting at a small table near the stage. Only one dancer sat with him, a blonde sex goddess -- actually sat ON him. They spent most of the evening making out except for the [long] time they spent in VIP.

He NEVER went to the stage to tip her when she was dancing but sent other dancers up with a wad of money. And that was ONLY after newbies, who hadn't learned he was her REGULAR, had already competed to drop ever increasing $$$ on stage in hopes of getting an LD.

After their VIP he left the club and she went to the backstage, dressed and left. She never danced with any other customers [but gladly accepted their tip$$] and rarely worked nights when he wasn't coming in.

Learned from other dancers that he wasn't just her regular he was her ONLY regular. Basically, she was a paid escort; the guy liked to show off by getting off in the club. She got to work at the club because her regular was "connected" and the club owner wasn't going to object. Some other dancers complained that "goldie" never paid her full tip out but that may have been envy or SS.

Several times at Bazookas I saw well-dressed businessmen with stylishly dressed business women. From repeated contact the BZ dancers had identified these women as upscale escorts who were paid as companions for these guys from the after business meeting cocktail party / dinner to the extracurriculars in the hotel room and late breakfast in the AM.

So the dancer-older gent make out can be golddigger-sugar daddy affair, not true love and paid escorts who don't look like hookers do visit SCs with their "dates."
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
14 years ago
Hah! I just read the review this snippet came from. Cassie, huh? The author may have been lucky. I've seen her "making" out with lots of guys.
avatar for StripClubXpert
StripClubXpert
14 years ago
A dancer can do anything she wants but seeing one make out with an old dude has got to be a turn off.. unless you are into old dudes.
avatar for steve229
steve229
14 years ago
"seeing one make out with an old dude has got to be a turn off.. unless you are into old dudes."

...or you ARE the old dude she's making out with, lol.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
14 years ago
I don't really mind the older dude in Joker44's story. Judging from the details we've been given, he's a club patron just like me, so it doesn't give me the negative instinctive reaction that a "real" boyfriend in the club would have given me. Sure, he's doing the "Bluto" -- occupying a girl to the exclusion of all other potential patrons. But at least she's making good money off of him and, generally, the interaction is respectful, in the sense that the girl's and the club's unofficial rules of behavior aren't being egregiously broken. They seem well within the confines of the fantasy which I desire.
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