What are some things a dancer does during a dance that annoys you?

I agree that the flipping over routine is not entertaining, especially when they smell bad. My all time peeve is when they claim to have danced more dances than they did.

i don't like when they hop up and down on my lap and i don't like the head down by my crotch simulated through the pants bj either.

asking for tips or trying to upsell to champagne room is a mood killer for me.
I do get annoyed also with the grinding on the leg and stomach routine.

Let's see...

-when they smack their own ass. Watching her do it is not a turn on for me.
-the old ass jiggle with their butt muscles-seen it 1000 times, still not hot.
-upsell for champagne room. I agree-hate that one as well.

- Leaving their clothes on.
- Continuing the conversation after I've explicitly said I'm not interested.
- Sitting down by me *right before* the dancer on stage, who I've been tipping and invited for a dance or drink, gets off stage and starts to walk toasted my table.
- Assuming that because I'm overweight, I'm going to be turned on by 200 lbs of flab dropping intoy lap.
- Interupting the conversation I'm having, with whoever, to beg for tips, cigarette money, etc.

Ok, so those aren't all during a dance. Still annoying.

the grinding on leg thing is really annoying? :(

how about what are the best things ladies can do during a lapdance?? (assuming full contact sans kitty is allowed)

Farting would be very annoying

I'm with rsharpe, smacking their ass and jiggling it in front of my face isn't what I want in a dance. That's good for the tip rail, not the couch room. It should be all contact back there.

Another pet peeve is when they follow "Jane's Book to Lap Dancing", meaning they have four moves/positions that they rinse and repeat in the same order throughout the song. Change up every once in a while

sharp said:when they smack their own ass. Watching her do it is not a turn on for me.
-the old ass jiggle with their butt muscles-seen it 1000 times, still not hot.

I agree

Add in:

A lapper is supposed to start with her leaning into me. Slamming into me, as if I'm a tackling dummy. is not erotic.

Houston lappers, universally, are supposed to involve tongue to nipple contact. Keeping the nipple from me is actually an insult.

Finally, lappers are supposed to be an erotic experience, for both of us. Going through the motions is an insult. I'm basically paying her 6.33 a minute. For that amount (360.00 an hour), it better be worth that amount. Keep in mind that the average shrink and lawyer, each, get 300 an hour. She has to provide a better service than either.

1. Trying to upsell.

2. Telling me to put it back in.

When a dancer tries to be sexy and puts her head close to mine and her breath makes my toes curl. Any chance of eroticism is killed at that point.

When a dancer moves my hands away from her breasts. In the clubs I go to that is considered a minimum requirement of a dance. What are you dancing at a club like this for? At that point, I become extremely bored.

When a dancer has the attitude that I'm lucky to be able to be near her. I want my dancer to at least pretend she likes it.

Complaining about it being a slow night, bouncing up and down as if she's in a rush to get it over with, smelling bad, whining about the manager and the bouncers, telling me about her boyfriend, bitching about child support, asking for free legal advice about her drunk driving case, bolting for the main floor as soon as the dances are paid for, taking cell phone calls during the dances, asking for, begging for or demanding tips, starting at the end of a song and counting that as a full dance, taking money directly out of my wallet when I am trying to pay for the dances, hinting that they want me to buy a meal (I'm hungry!), wanting to know where I live and who lives with me. Yes, all of these things have happened during dances.

Not making Mr. Happy REAL happy.

lol superdude, i've experienced every one of those except for the her taking money out of my wallet one, i have something new to look forward to now ;)

Yeha, SD: After reading ALL of that, is it worth it to even go? I think I'd take a break and head for a pub to chill.

1. checking themselves out in the mirror while they're supposed to be concentrating on you
2. looking around the surrounding area for her next potential dance partner when she's supposed to be concentrating on you
3. every dance is the same repetitive sequence (no creativity)

these are just a few, but for the most part the annoyances are few because I can very easily stop the entertainment and move on. I don't allow anyone else to take control of my happiness or lack thereof.

Moves I don't like:

1. Grinding with full force of body weight. It's supposewd to be light grinding, not-grind off.
2. Pushing my hands away --from anywhere. Definitely a don't invest with her again move.
3. Changing the house price for dances because "they are better" at the higher price. This is BS, if you are not dancing at your best all the time, forget you. I pay for the experience and the outcome, not dances by a unit price. If you're good to me, I'm good to you.
4. The bounce up and down move, hate it.
5. Not taking advantagbe of easy access when it's available.
6. Asking for a tip or demanding one because she knew I had a good time. Hey, that's what you are supposed to be doing.
7. Everything SuperDude said (yes, they've happened to me too, even reaching into my wallet!)

Now, all this can be managed by proper rotation of dancers, simple conversational instructions and blatant ignoring of dancer come-ons.

While I agree with many of the suggestions above, I have distilled the experience down to a simple evaluation that works for me: either the girl is "dick friendly" or "dick averse". Most of the moves I dislike are those designed by the girl to do anything but pay proper attention to Mr. Dave.

I've had everything everyone's mentioned except the bouncing up and done move. Don't know how I lucked out on never experiencing this since it seems just about everyone has had dancers do that

In addition to most of the above, I would add the fake, close to the ear,porn-movie moan that is supposed to convince us that they are aroused. Purring is not much better. We realize that their lust for us is mostly fabricated--we don't need hokey sound effects to emphasize it.

I hate when the girl won't get close. Grinding on my lap while keeping her back stock straight is less than intimate. Also hate when she won't straddle me.

I hate it when the stupid whores talk. We are not paying them for conversation after all.

I had a stripper who took the ear nibbling to a new and irritating level. She stuck her tongue in my ear canal and popped it, which was extremely uncomfortable.

1. Asking for a tip
2. Talking on cell phone in lap dance area
3. Talking about her husband/boyfriend
4. Complaining about her problems
5. Complaining about not making any money
6. Not smiling
7. Miscounting number of dances
8. Spending all of her time in the dressing room
9. Spending most of the stage dance with her front/face away from the customers
10. Smoking at my table without asking if I mind.

Good addition Ssnowtime with item #2, talking on a cell phone is a big no-no.

Asking afterwards if I had a good time/enjoyed myself/had fun (or some variation).

If she was doing her job right, she wouldn't have to ask.

Steve I can not agree more. Some months ago I asked a dancer before hand would her dance provide contact(She use to dance at a no Contact club) and she pretty much gave the green light that it would be. Unfortunately that was a lie, and she had the nerve to ask me how did I like it after it was over.

That reads a little jaded for Steve. Beware the dark side...

snowtime, you didn't even get a dance from her on Tuesday. Did I tell you about the cell phone? I am talking about Aimee at the Columbia Platinum Plus. On Monday she agreed to a 2 fer for $25. During the entire 1st song she was talking on her cell phone while trying to give me at lap dance at the same time. Talk about a mood killer! The 2nd dance was Ok but by that time I had lost interest. gridget agreed with me that Aimee was strung out on drugs. Avoid this bitch.

I pretty much agree with what everybody else contributed.

Shadowcat, what are you smoking? I di a 2 for one with her just before I left the club and AFTER I got your consent for a dance from her. While I was getting the dance form Gridget I did see Amy(?) giving a dance to a customer across form me. She was talking on her cell phone then and that is what prompted my comment above regarding cell phone use.

snowtime, What I meant was you didn't get a dance from Aimee (Amy)on Tuesday.

since most of you covered the usual annoyance that the strippers do
the one turn off is when they avoid you for most of your visit
and then when you try to leave all of a sudden they want a dance.

and another turn off is this, if you see a dancer giving another guy
very good grindage during a table dance and she comes over to you
and asks if you want a dance and you take one, and all of a sudden
she gives an dance that would almost be considered an air dance if
it wasn't for the slight contact just for a tease.

and yeah, most of what yall said annoys me too, i was lucky to not have
experienced half of what some of you mentioned.