Dancers who don't seem to want anything from you -- the most confusing kind
luckyone
Florida
Saturday, December 19, 2009 8:39 AM
Understanding the dancer/customer relationship is usually simply a matter of economics. Most any interaction is going to be governed by the simple fact that you have money and she would very much like to take it away from you. Some girls are more subtle than others, recognizing you as a regular customer who can be cultivated and who might turn out to be a regular source of income. Others are more direct and short-term thinkers, giving the occasional "wanna dance" but mostly seeking out someone who is going to easily be separated from their wallets right then and there. As a pretty regular customer at two clubs where I rarely get dances, I have observed some other behaviors which are a bit harder to explain but not impossible. Sometimes girls will just park themselves at my table, usually willing to accept a drink but rarely asking, and sit for a while. Often it is a girl I tip regularly on stage but not always. Sometimes she will sit for a while and seem to want to talk. Other times, she may just sit down long enough to smoke a cigarette and then excuse herself. I suspect this serves two purposes. I am not the type of customer who tries to grope or hit on the dancers when they sit with me. I am not offensive or smelly or gross. I am, I suppose the right word is, "safe." So I serve as a safety zone if a dancer wants to take a break. If I tip them, it also allows them to "reward" me with their presence. At times, the girls just doesn't want to work. Sometimes she has already made her day and other times she has simply given up on making it. In that case, they may sit for 30 minutes or an hour or more. Of course, it also helps if the place is not crowded but that isn't necessarily always the case. I've even had them tell me to pretend I'm paying them to sit there because they don't want to deal with some of the other customers in the place. ( I should say that I never pay for conversation, regardless of how much I may be attracted to them. )<br />
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So what of the dancer who does this all the time? I suppose there are few explanations. She enjoys the conversation and finds you more interesting than sitting in the back texting on her phone or hanging around some random dude. Doesn't mean that she wants to be your best friend outside the club but that you are the "lesser of many evils" when she is at work. She might also be really into you. I find it hard to believe that women attractive enough to make money off their looks are flocking to me because they want me to rock their world. I occasionally get the feeling they might but I suspect that, in most cases, they are just hoping to lure me into dances (however unlikely) or perhaps some sort of OTC arrangement. You may want to adjust your own expectations in these cases. If attractive young women often come on to you, then it is possible the dancer is too. If not, I would proceed with caution. That being said, the warnings about "dating a dancer" on here should also serve as a warning about pursuing anything with her.<br />
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But what of the dancer who actually refuses drinks, sits with you for way too long, gives out her real name and contact information, actually buys you little gifts, remembers every little detail about you that you've ever discussed and even agrees to spend time with you outside the club? What of the dancer who says she will give you a ride home if you have had too much to drink and need it? What of the dancer who texts you her random thoughts in the middle of the day? What of the dancer who comes by your work just to say hi? She has a boyfriend and doesn't seem particularly interested in me romantically. So what is in it for her? I am very tempted to conclude that this young lady just wants to be my friend and is serious about it. It is confusing as that is the last thing I would expect one of these ladies to want. There's no money, no sex, no drugs, really nothing in it for her except my company. So there you go. The most confusing kind of dancer. I'm perplexed.<br type="_moz" />
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