Dancers who are Married

If a PL is jealous of a sex worker, he's delusional, and likely need professional counseling. I don't assume a sex worker is lying to their SO about their work. In any case, I'm guilty enough of dishonesty with an SO, that I grade other people's dishonesty with their SO on a curve. If an extras stripper tells her SO she air dances, I couldn't judge that without being a hypocrite. If she does bareback and gives him VD, that crosses a line I wouldn't cross.

A dancer's relationship status makes no difference at all to me. What matters to me is my relationship with her, and I've had fantastic relationships with dancers who were single, in a committed relationship, and married...

If a dancers got a husband or boyfriend, its usually boyfriend/husband pimp who is leeching off her.

But even if you dont care about that, the biggest thing is the dancer is probably going to have limitations on her service. No kissing, no daty, no CIM, maybe no bbbj, maybe no cuddling, or maybe she will be a strict clock watcher where she wouldn’t provide even a minute of extra time beyond what was paid for. There will probably be limitations of some sort.

Makes no difference to me. They are doing a job. Taking myself to Ruth's Chris on Wednesday then to PT's Show Club in Denver.

OK, I got a tad carried away. Shitty day for me as a radial progressive person got in my face over dogs that I've know for 6 years. The New Yorker/Terrier person in me started to emerge. To quote Peter Fonda in "Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry", btw good movie - I just wanted to "Braid her tits" only not enough there to get started. 1,000 years ago, she'd be one to sacrifice goats and through perfectly good virgins in a volcano. I have a "business" relationship that will END this year, without the need for bail.

When I was married, she passed over 26 months ago (a few here know), strippers didn't care. One asked me about my Black Hills Gold wedding band as it was different and I never took it off for 37 years. I told her my wife has (at the time) Stage Two Elapsing Remitting MS, and once in awhile I just wanted just to get "out" a few time a year to enjoy naked women. She gave me this look like she understood, it wasn't fake. However, I never ever looked for FS or anything like that.

So yeah, if they are married, not my place to judge, I'm fine.

Actually, I have way more female friends than male - estrogen can get a tad much at times. Several strippers have said they have a GF at home or seeing one.

I pay you money, we have a good time, and no commitments.

I will say I miss companionship at home, 25 years of MS for me was brutal, she developed dementia with a different reality. While my best years were spent as a caregiver, my dogs help today, plus I'm raising a litter of 5 Collies (will be 7-weeks old on Tuesday.) In the dog show world I'm are around a LOT of women, I mean 90%, which is fine by me. They are very good friends around the country. Some from age 30 to 70 I've known for 27 years.

I was at a service dog fundraiser on Saturday helping $200K that I support, and one woman ' known for 6 years there really wants me to run for County Commissioner next year as she is too in her district. I'm seriously considering it as I know we'd make a good Conservative Tag Team, and not NOTHING between us, just dogs..

Anyways, shitty day today and why I'm going to Ruth's Chris on Wednesday then enjoying my hobby with a few strippers.

I found it weird the first couple times, but after awhile, I just assumed if they were married, their husband was all right with it. Then I met my old favorite Angel, who was married, and after performing various sex acts with her, wondered if her wedding vows meant anything to her.

I remember one time at Follies when one of my favorites told me that she was pregnant. Without thinking first I asked "Do you know who the father is?" to which she replied "My husband". Another at Platinum Plus is Columbia SC ,who knew that I did reviews on TUSCL, asked me to not use her name in my reviews because her husband was a deputy sheriff in the next county. So No it doesn't bother me.

Do you think strippers are offended that customers are married? I’m partially being sarcastic.

Years ago I was in a club and this attractive stripper giving off a crazy vibe plopped down at my table uninvited and started complaining about how gross it is for married men to go to strip clubs. I didn’t say a word and thought, if this is your intro line you’re going to turn off about 75% of each potential customer you meet, maybe more.

When I go into a club I don't think about what type of relationship a stripper is in. It kills the fantasy for everyone involved including the stripper. In reality I assume most strippers I come into contact with are in relationships. After all johnsmith69 is still out there somewhere.

i only care if any drama in her life will spill over into mine. I have known many married strippers. They are often the ones that bring the least drama.

A few years ago I was seeing an escort on a regular basis. She got married. Didn't mind at all, truth be told, I kind of got off on the fact that I was doing everything possible under the sun to this woman, and I mean everything, even though she 'belonged" to another man. I've actually got a video of her giving head, and while she's adding her hand in, you can see her wedding band. I often wondered, "How can you be married to someone that has no-limits sex with anyone that can afford it?"

They all know I am married (it helps with dancers) and I never ask about their relationship status. No interest. The single dumbest reason to enter a long term relationship is sex and the single dumbest reason to leave a long term relationship is sex.

I never cared, but recently watched another PL crash and burn after learning "his girl" was married.

He broke the first rule of strip club - don't fall in love with a stripper. But he did, spending thousands of dollars and monopolizing her time for hours on every visit. He kept telling me how much she and his girl cared about each other, and that they had a special thing going.

Well, he disappeared for a while and when he returned, he no longer sat in his usual spot. Came to find out his girl got pregnant. That didn't bother him so much as the fact that It was her husband who impregnated her.

Apparently, he felt betrayed and the whole "relationship" fell apart. The dude was in his '60s, And while initially sorry for him, I felt mostly a sad sense of how easy it is to fall under the spell.

No matter what any dancer says, they will always love your money and will never love you. No relationship based on money is anything other than a financial transaction, no matter how many pretty bows you put on it.

Yup. Don’t like

That’s one reason I prefer 21yo dancers , less likely to be married There also others !

Those who remember HBO’s America Undercover: Hookers on Point episodes. One of the girls had a husband. He would follow her and her date to write down the plate number of the date. In case she got hurt. Kinda strange to see that whole dynamic, but it happens.

As far as dancers having husbands/BF/GF, it doesn’t matter as long as the person isn’t in the club watching her work. Too much drama with that. The few I met that weren’t single, usually turned out to be the biggest sluts. That’s my 2 cents.

I’ve spent over 35 years as a PL.

After encountering multiple thousands of dancers in that time, I have yet to ask a single one about their relationship status.

I don't ask, but most of my favs talk to me about their SOs. Many strippers confide in regulars who have genuine but non-needy affection for them. Such regulars may be the only older adults who both care about them and also don't judge them for doing sex work.

"Does it matter to you if you learn a dancer is married?"

Not really. It's really just a matter of psycho the SO is. One of the dancers I used to bang would have her husband drive her kid around town while we would hook up. That didn't last long because many red flags lol, but it happened...

@Alfred69 did she let you bang her bare and finish inside? That is the most obvious limitation with sex workers but most guys probably dont want to do that anyway, so it works out fine whether they are married or not.
Another big one is lip kissing or tongue kissing followed by daty.

I met this dancer on the road, she really seemed to like me, we went to VIP, she immediately started to suck my cock and within a few songs, I blew in her mouth - hard. We repeated this over a few business trips and she called me consistent and fun. Then one trip another dancer spotted me and started talking about my miss blow job - she told me she was married and I would never get her pussy (reserved for husband only) so I went for it and sure it, blocked and she got a bit pissed at me for trying. oh well, 10 great blow jobs - good times.

Doesnt matter to me at all. A dancer i saw for awhile (ITC only) actually would wear her wedding or engagement ring during her shift. I wasnt sure which one it was since it didnt matter to me.

What i liked about her was she was very upfront about everything and didnt have a scamming bone in her body. She also never hassled me once and at times even gave a slight discount if it was later in the month, or later in the night. Professional and chill beyond belief.

Much of that was probably due to how upfront her personality was to begin with. We had eachothers phone number and she also never sang the blues about money, rent etc etc. Which ive found a lot of dancers seem to do these days

@rickthehick - No, for vaginal or anal sex, it was always covered - but I never asked for bare. She also did nice, deep kissing, and cuddling up afterwards - it wasn't like she just did the job, she really seemed to enjoy fucking every which way, while hubby was at home. Crazy.

My ATF met her boyfriend, later husband, after we started having sex. Meeting him, and later marrying him, didn't stop her from seeing me. And he knew. She told him at one point that if he couldn't accept that she was going to see me when I visited, he shouldn't marry her. He was always cool. Polite. he and I still talk periodically.

Doesn’t matter at all to me. I would never broach the subject but some dancers would mention their relationship status and I didn’t care. One super hot dancer I would get dances from regularly wore a big diamond wedding ring on the sexy hand (yes, she was so hot even her hands were perfect - tan, with perfect manicured and painted nails) she used to give me HJs. She would talk about her kids. I remember her telling the story that the her kids friends all thought she was a super model. I believed it - she had strikingly beautiful eyes and a killer body.

They all have SOs. If anything, the ones who cohabitate with their SOs are often better targets because it usually means that they have another mouth to feed. Rarely have I come across a stripper with a husband/BF who was worth a damn.

The one exception to this are those strippers who are quick to advertise that they're married. It's one thing to learn about it naturally, but another when the girl is tripping over herself to let you know. IME this is invariably a defense mechanism designed to head off various overtures. I send these girls away pronto.

"No matter what any dancer says, they will always love your money and will never love you. No relationship based on money is anything other than a financial transaction, no matter how many pretty bows you put on it."

@skibum609 I've had more than one experience where this was not the case, but I'm not even slightly bothered if someone chooses not to believe that. Hell, I was damn surprised each time that I had somehow managed to cross over that line. If I had a bit of initial hesitation in believing it myself, I'm not going to fault anyone who wasn't there for believing that I was somehow just mistaken... 😂

I don't care one way or the other. I did have a dancer one time agree to give me head while saying "I don't usually do this, but I'm trying to raise money for my husband and kids to go on a cruise."

Anytime I get a bbbj from a stripper without me asking for it, comes from a married stripper

@georgmicrodong that isnt a surprising or crazy story. Its normal for sex workers of all kinds to have partners or husbands who know about their work. In the situation you describe, her husband was obviously the typical husband pimp who wasnt bringing in much money- thus his wife stripping and doing sex work. Also obviously she would have told her husband that she is doing sex work in general- you worded it as if she only mentioned you to the husband but obviously she would have told him about all her clients, whether ITC or OTC.

@rickdugan it is all about the money my friend. If the husband or bf has any notable amount of money, the stripper retires. Maybe very few switch to stage performances only, for some unusual reason.

Honestly, it bothers me. It kind of ruins the fantasy, and makes me wonder what her deal is. I was at a club in Tampa and just wound up having a conversation with a random dancer at the bar. She was hot, easy 7+ if a little older. But we had a good conversation and were vibing well until she mentioned that her husband is a lawyer and she used to be his office manager. That knocked my interest down several notches. Nothing changed, she looked the same, the dances would have costs the same, but I was pulled out of the fantasy and had to wonder what the wife of a lawyer was doing dancing at the Gold Club daytime shift. Likewise, I was talking to a past CF who was in the process of talking me into being her SD, when her phone rang. It was something like her BF, husband, or baby's daddy who was watching her kid and needed help with finding pop tarts or something. This girl was a 9- damn near perfect- but that closed the door on my interest in her outside the club. None of the dynamics inside the club change, but the energy with the dancer and my perception of her is altered.

@rickthehick: "her husband was obviously the typical husband pimp who wasnt bringing in much money"

LOL! You should really learn to keep silent concerning things about which you know nothing. Not only was he not her pimp, she met him long after she'd stopped dancing and moved back to where her family lives. He's actually a really good guy, and continues to take care of her kids, even though two of them aren't his. He had to fight for their custody after she died, because the dads, who'd had no interest in them while she was alive, suddenly wanted them after she was gone. Fortunately for the kids, he won.

@georgmicrodong your ascribing things to the term pimp that dont exist. A pimp legally speaking is just anyone who lives off the earnings of a sex worker. That includes a sex worker who pays a portion of rent and has her partner living with her.

Your also misinterpreting and exaggerating the convo she had with her husband. Her convo with her husband wasnt “i really like this GMD guy and will continue seeing him, you can leave if you dont like it.”.

Her convo was more like “im a sex worker, this is what i do for money, and unless you give me the same amount of money, im not quitting sex work.”

My point is you seem to have deluded yourself into thinking she had no clients besides you, or that she specifically only discussed you with her husband, when the reality of the situation is she obviously told her husband about her sex work in general.

Also even if she quit dancing that means absolutely nothing, again you somehow have deluded yourself into believing she was only seeing you OTC and nobody else- even if she claimed that to you its literally part of the hustle- these chicks know how these geeky nerdy guys are very possessive and jealous so theyll pretend theyre only seeing one guy for sex when the reality is theyre seeing 4, 5, actually as many clients as they can possibly manage to.

You claim to have spent years with sex workers and dancers so i have no idea why you are under the impression a dancer, even a former dancer, would only have one client at a time.

This is all standard sex worker/dancer stuff. If they meet a guy who isnt wealthy enough they have a conversation about their sex work, possibly agree on some boundaries for it, since the guy in almost all of the cases isnt able to provide the same level of income she would be getting from sex work

@georgmicrodong by your own admission this chick had at minimum, 3 different baby daddies- since you claimed the husband had at least one kid plus at least two other dads. Even that alone should be enough proof that she obviously didnt only have you alone as her OTC client. Even if she quit dancing theres no magic rule that dancers who quit dancing, can then only have one husband and one client at a time, or something…

"She was hot, easy 7+ if a little older. But we had a good conversation and were vibing well until she mentioned that her husband is a lawyer and she used to be his office manager. That knocked my interest down several notches. Nothing changed, she looked the same, the dances would have costs the same, but I was pulled out of the fantasy" Honestly, I don't get what the problem is here. It wrecks your "fantasy" - what's your fantasy, she's going to quit dancing and devote herself to you for the rest of your life? You think she's dancing with hundreds of guys, just waiting for you to come along? While I think it's possible for a dancer to like a customer and even have some "favs", the idea that somehow you will "be the one" is ludicrous. Be happy that this hot girl has some interest in you, and leaver it at that. My, I would just get off on the idea that I'm getting freaky with some schmuck lawyers wife.

@Alfred69 that lawyer scenario is not at all the norm, and if its actually true, either the guy is just stingy and doesnt give her spending money of any kind, or she needs secret money that her husband doesnt know about, either to get drugs or if shes a foreign/immigrant woman who wants to secretly send money back home to family.

The other scenario he mentioned about the babydaddy babysitting the kid at home looking for pop tarts is much more the norm.

And yeah its completely sad how jealous or possessive some strip club goers can get, although the husband/partner situation is a bit different because you are at minimum supporting a leech, but also in most cases the girl if shes american born will have all kinds of rules

I get it, alfred69 is an incel. He can't get a woman to even look his way without forking over his meager little paycheck. His triggered little outburst is to be expected. Let me explain it this way: if you had money and women, like me, then you would also have options. You would know that strippers are meant to be different than the MILFs you meet at PTA meetings and pool parties. I go to strip clubs to escape the grind of the everyday and the mill of married women and single mothers to regress back to a younger age when it was assumed the sexy young girl was equally unattached and uncommitted as I was. If she is committed or attached, then I could be at a bar or a party outside the club. Guys like al, who are ignored by women OTC, don't understand the difference in dynamics inside the club v outside. Hopefully, you understand just a little better now. You're welcome.

My Cuban fav says her bad English is not really a big disadvantage. She just pretends to understand everything. It works because the PLs aren't looking for an interactive conversation, they just enjoy it that a hot woman seem interested in what they have to say. If strippers want to make the best $ they can, they should be hesitant to be too genuinely friendly with customers. If the PL makes it worth her while to feign interest in his monologues, it's his money, and it's relatively easy. If she honestly can detect the stripper persona he wants to converse with, and fake it, only bad if he takes it too seriously. Being real in convo with customers should not be default behavior for strippers.

@theone&only thats nonsensical because a bar or regular club will have a higher proportion of single ladies than a strip club.
Also your post is untrue and the opposite of reality. Its guys who get jealous and possessive that are incels

Rickthehick - Exactly. Total nonsense. I'll leave it at that.

*triggered, lol. I'm living in his head, rent-free.

@rickthehick:

You're just going to double down on "I never met this person, so I know everything about her" thing, aren't you? If there were an Olympic event for Jumping to Conclusions, I'm sure you'd be the champion.

As others here can probably attest, if they remember, I never assumed she wasn't seeing others. She told me I was the only one, but I didn't care even if she was lying, and I told her that.

I think you feel the need to feel better about yourself, so you've chosen me to denigrate to that end, because a guy who fell in love with a stripper is an easy target. I hope it's working.

@georgmicrodong not at all my friend. Thats nice of you to admit you were in love with her, then

Of course I admit it. I admitted then as well. I'm not ashamed of it, at all.

She's in club for my short-term entertainment. I don't care at all what her out-of-club situation is....at least to the extent that she doesn't take her home drama into the club. Your husband pissed you off? I don't give a F...do your job.

Now, if I know she's married, there's a certain pleasure knowing I'm defiling some other dude's chick.

This is a decent question.

First of all, turn the tables--these dancers deal with married men as patrons, all the time. They can handle it; easy. So, we patrons can't handle it, if the tables are turned?

The one time that I think. I was with a married / taken dancer: yo, she was fine as hell. Looked like a big rock on her finger, that she shouldn't be wearing in a 'hood club, no way. She was too damned fine. Her lap dancing skills were a hard average, but she was so damn fine. So, I was actually more excited than usual; that someone so friggin fine and possibly taken / attached with that big rock on her hand was spending time with me. We chatted a lil about it, I think she told me she just got proposed to and I was like, I believe it, I think she said she was about to quit dancing. I was thinking her lap dancing skills should be the reason lol. She wasn't horrible. Let's just say at that time, many dancers in that room were better lap dancers than her. But she was fine, had a good personality. Definitely wifey-able.

Now, the REAL bummer: dancer with young kids. I saw this dancer OTC (outside the club) in my early 20s, she was the same age. We met at the hotel. 1pm. Weekday. She pulled up in a hooptie (ok) and a very young looking empty child seat. We were the same age, early 20s, but I was sooo shook looking at that real tiny baby car seat. I had no idea she had kids. I was young. We were young. It was one of my first OTCs and I was completely not ready for that moment. That was a mood killer. Like, lady, it's 1pm on a weekday. I'm fitting to spend a couple hours here. You should be with your newborn, ma'am. The rest of that rendezvous went downhill fast. I didn't tell her why. But definitely her being a brand new mom and us being so young, nah.

Today, it's many many years later, maybe I feel different. Depends on the dancer and situation, maybe, I guess. I'm talking OTC with a new mom. But that first time with a new mom, I couldn't do it.

But sure I know a ton of dancers got kids and I still get lap dances, VIP treatment funtime, in the club.

I dunno; how would you feel, in 2026, your first time with a new dancer, in a hotel and she pulls up with a baby car seat and you can tell it's for a newborn. And it's a weekday mid afternoon. lol.

That is a shame if she has to dance to support her man and kid .

I've had SOs who just lived off me. When you love someone, their happiness is your happiness. You don't see a good reason for them to work some low-paying, thankless job, for $ that the household doesn't need. If a stripper's making decent, steady money, it's not automatically a pimp-like situation, if she has a non-working SO. Especially if the SO's home with their kids.

@sleazyperv its normal. Usually the ghetto guy works at a retail store, usually a sneaker or weed shop, maybe deals some drugs on the side and his girl strips. In hood culture its considered high status to date or marry a stripper, which makes it all the more acceptable and commendable. Its seen as even better than dating a civvie non stripper girl

@ilbbaicnl it actually is a pimp situation. When you say its not automatically a pimp situation, it sounds like your talking about pimp stereotypes like beating a girl or forcing her to work for you.

Technically and legally speaking a pimp is just anyone, male or female, that knowingly profits or lives off the earnings of a prostitute.

So if its a non extras stripper, since shes not having sex shes not literally a prostitute, but if shes doing lapdances shes still a sex worker, which makes her partner a quasi pimp since hes living off her sex worker money. And if she does extras or escorts, then he is a full on pimp unless he somehow doesnt know what shes doing