Should I stop going?

If it's not fun for you, then stop.

If you are posting here, it means you want to stop. Pull the plug.

Don't be a submissive person and let other people's opinions decide what you need to do... Listen to your own gut and move on for simple decisions like these.

Seconding Call.Me.Ishmael & stainglass.

Based on your own writing: "feels like expensive masturbation." Diminishing returns, at the very least. At this point - at least from what I can infer based on your activity in this general space - no one can say you didn't at least try things out. You've probably tried enough plenty of different types of girls, and in more than one setting, from the sounds of it.

Also, I understand that sentiment about the state of...well, I wouldn't call it the "dating" market anymore. God knows that ship has sailed. Let's call it the modern "flesh market", or perhaps the "flesh exchange".

Things have changed radically, and in a very short period of time - gender norms, sexuality, the "family unit". It remains to be seen whether there will be any serious consequences for where technology has gone, and how it's changed virtually everything in such a relatively short period of time. Plenty will argue that we're all "obviously fine", but I'd like to remind them that some things take time. We may all just be F-ing around, and we're going to find out. There just might be a big time lag before that happens. Years. Maybe a few decades (but it's already been a couple decades, arguably).

I'm ranting- but TLDR, I don't think it's just you, man. I think your self-proclaimed binging, as well as your current state of mind, is actually understandable. I think I might be in a similar boat, mentally.

As someone who has battled depression, "I fuck a stripper for free but I'm not that into it" smells a lot like depression to me.

If it's not fun, don't go. Don't spend your money on something you don't enjoy.

You also may be at a point in your life where you want something "real". You didn't mention your civvy dating portfolio. At 37, fit with no kids you should be able to slay the (30+) dating world.

I’m just worried I’ve been tainted by the 30 minute girl friend and forget mindset. I’m probably overthinking it. I also need to find places to engage with these women, I don’t do online dating.

"been told I'm very decent looking"

Yeah your no longer welcome here

Na hey man it's gotta be fun. For me if I'm going to the same club every fucking weekend I would get sick of that shit so quick. What helps me I like to change it up a little bit keep things brand new, new girls, new everything all the time. Maybe switch off from Pandora's. Or hell like the other guys are saying do something else. Once this shit stops being fun I'm out too. You can always come back later, it ain't goin anywhere.

Did you already look decent before the weight loss? Or are the compliments mostly on your physique rather than facial attractiveness

If you can see a stripper OTC for free, and shes hot, i would continue. But how much are you spending on each dinner date?

You said shes more into it than you are, why is that. You got big dick?

I looked attractive but had a dad bod, I went from a 36” waist line to a 30” waist line.

I’m also socially awkward as fuck

Its best to look at strippers as entertainers, rather than dating prospects. If you're going to clubs thinking it will turn into a real relationship, you're in the wrong place.

As with anything, once it's no longer fun, find another hobby.

If you’re not sure you can take a break. You can always go back if you realize you miss it and it’s an expensive hobby if you’re not really enjoying it.

obviously you need to take up a hobby that you really like. such as collecting stamps. or collecting bugs...

The dinner date otc isnt that expensive?

Do they massage you or feel up your muscles basically? Some dancers do some feeling up as part of their routine

I golf, hunt and fish thank you very much.

Dropping $40 extra in this economy isn’t too bad.

@Context22

I will play along and answer the question:

Q: Should I stop going?

A: YES, if you have to ask, you already know what is the best thing to do for yourself.

The adult industry pay-for-pleasure/sex hobby is not for everyone, it is extremely expensive economically, mentally, morally, socially speaking.

Your “vanilla hobbies” golf, hunt and fish are not going to help you find the future mother of your children. If that is what you want.

With respect to relationship with women in general you can call them civilians and or strippers if you want ; I would refer you to Demosthenes (384 – 12 October 322 BC)
Greek statesman and orator of ancient Athens.

1. We have courtesans for the sake of pleasure.
2. Concubines for the daily health of our bodies, and
3. Wives to bear us lawful offspring and be the faithful guardians of our homes

In this list is the Greek view of woman in the classic age.

And in all ages and times.

All men want that, but only some can afford it...

In today’s world Demosthenes would say:

We have:

1. high end escorts, centerfolds, actresses, models, Strippers (ITC OTC) etc that provide PSE/GFE for the sake of pleasure.
2. Mistresses/Sugar Babies/; etc, for the daily health of our body.
3. Trophy Girlfriends/Wives to bear us lawful offspring, and be the faithful guardians of our homes.
4. Realistic Sex Dolls/Gynoids/Fembots, and Internet Porn and Instagram/Onlyfans “Models”, for kicks-and-giggles”.

Remember

“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.”

~ Cuban refugee Tony Montana (Al Pacino) in the movie Scarface.

If you have the money and can afford it, buy it and enjoy it, if you don’t have the money or you can’t afford it economically, mentally, morally, emotionally, physically, intellectually etc etc etc then don’t buy things you can’t afford…

Just be careful out there whatever you decide to go.

It also doesn’t help that you are in Seattle which is by nature a depressing place. And the strip clubs there are quite boring. Sure, there are extras to be had - but the clubs themselves are boring and predictable.

Lemme give you some rickvice Context Ape: stop whining like a lil’ girly man and learn how to frickin’ enjoy yourself.

You know what helps? Alcohol. Also makes the drivin’ more enjoyable. My favorite drivin’ whiskey: Jack. Plain old number 7 is good workin’ ape whiskey, and it’s good enough for this workin’ lion!

If you can’t be happy with the simple things in life, like drivin’ a Tesla, fuckin’ a sexy female hairless ape or two, and drinkin’ a bottle of Jack then there is something wrong with you. ROAR!!!

OP describes himself as having anxiety (socially awkward) and depression. That combination will forever be a lifelong battle and can only go away with effort. If you can figure out a way to seek stable and committment minded women, you’ll be more comfortable with yourself and relieve yourself from the anxiety and depression. Strippers are like that too, so yiu probably attract like minded whores who are looking for an easy escape. I’m sure with some effort you can find your way into something stable.

Yiu mention not wanting kids, probably because children create much anxiety, but the alternative leading a lonely life without meaning cause me even more anxiety. There is nothing free in life, so put one foot in front of the other and embrace this life called chaos, and meet stable commitment minded women who have a stable job. Yiu don’t even have to talk much because the woman will want to do all the talking anyway. Just show up, eat, drink, laugh and take things slow. Strippers’ lives are just too much about constantly filling their emotional void with crap, so stay away unless you’re there to get a quick handy (lol).

A good start would be to stop posting duplicate threads. If club going isn't fun, at least taking a break and finding another hobby is in order. Maybe play chess with the "Waco Kid", ala Blazing Saddles.

"If you can figure out a way to seek stable and commitment minded women, you’ll be more comfortable with yourself and relieve yourself from the anxiety and depression."

And as soon as you find a way, please write a book about how its done. Millions of men will be grateful and you'll have millions in your bank account!

^
Imma give you (and context ape) some rickvice that will at least help you enjoy your normie lives. Find something you enjoy.

This may surprise you, but some people enjoy playing weird characters on the internet. Even on this board there are weirdos that create fictional lives to amuse themselves and others.

For example, there is this weird guy that has made up a divorce lawyer character with rage issues. Here is the weird part: he claims to have went to the worst law school in the country. You’d think that you’d make your fictional character be a real winner that went to Harvard or Yale Law or something like that. But he totally went the other direction. Apparently this loser divorce lawyer character fills out divorce paperwork in crayon and spends most of his time in court posting on this board rather than representing his clients.

Identify a character that will enjoy and start posting. It’ll give you the confidence to find a stable and commitment minded woman. Your character should probably not be as pathetic as the worst divorce lawyer in the country character - only a real loser would enjoy playing that character - but don’t go overboard in the other direction. I mean really, if you try to play a rick the coolness will totally crush you. I mean really, we ricks are so cool our coolness has its own gravitational field. Normies can’t take that level of coolness.

I hope this helps. ROAR!!!

WiseToo, I couldn’t write a book with as little experience as I have, but I did find one girl who is stable and committed and enjoys raising a family. Talk about a new level of anxiety and depression, you don’t know it until you’ve experienced it with family in tow.

However, what I could write a book about is all of the flops during my single years when I was silly with women and for whatever reason attracted the craziest bitches around. Carefree and single as they say. It took me a long time to understand it was my choices that were taking me to them, and simply by slowing down and listening to the right cues when dating a woman allowed me to filter out the train wrecks quickly and move on. I probably dated well over 100-200 women, and frankly I lost track after 50 frustrated trysts. It took me another 50 or so once I figured out what I need to look for, stable and commitment minded woman. The end👀!

OK, so we have to delve more into the stripper who promoted you from PL to fuckbuddy. But you seem kindof meh about it. Even though, I think it's safe to say, that's a never in a lifetime event for most PLs. Do you think you are, or are becoming, asexual? I don't mean that in a snarky way at all, I think I might be much happier if I were asexual.

I did have one fav who seemed to get some enjoyment out of our physical relationship. I've never been with a woman who got nearly as wet as she did. In spite of me being very fat and 30+ years older than her. She said it didn't take much to get her very wet. It seemed like she was having good orgasms. But she said they were pretty meh, as her orgasms went. She told me the best sex she ever had was with a batshit ex con who eventually stalked her and stole her car. She was taking $1,200 a week off me for many months. But, she gradually got more and more obnoxious. To the point where, after giving it one more try several times, I had to stop seeing her. But I have no bad feelings toward her, because she had a horribly abusive childhood. Pathetic or not, it was, on the whole, an experience I treasure.

So, anyways, the point of that long boring story was, it's complicated. I have lasted longer, and ultimately gotten more total satisfaction, with favs who were far less into me physically. Because they seemed at least average as far as avoiding self-destructive, self-defeating behavior. And it was more clear that they were using me to move in a good, hopeful direction in their lives. So, maybe that's what is missing for you too. You have to find sex workers where you can feel some hope for their futures. But, you likely will have to compromise on other attractive qualities. And you have to remember it's a crazy world. I regularly remind myself that's it's crazy that I choose to not be crazy, because it makes me so uncomfortable with the world's craziness. That causes me to be more comfortable with moderate craziness in others.

Ilbb what is your weight, how fat are you? Can you explain what she was doing to be more and more obnoxious to where you had to stop seeing her? Was she not providing any services even after taking payment from you? Also $1,200 for a single meetup every week is ridiculous!

Do you lack the discretionary income to afford it?

Do you no longer enjoy naked young women stage dancing, pole dancing, and lap dancing?

Are you at risk of losing something more precious if your hobby is discovered?

Is it too inconvenient by travel time or distance to go to strip clubs?

If your answers are all "no", then I see no reason to stop.

Been down the same path. When I get bored with the clubs, I mix it up with the hobby providers. I’ve got couple local go-to hottie providers who I have good chemistry. When bored, i mix in some touring providers. Variety is the spice of my life.

I had a longer reply, but I then saw the OP is from a few months ago and dude is probably gone now.

I will just say if you're a single man and you haven't given up, you have to get out of the northern US...it's not really a choice anymore. At the very least the options for P4P are so much better.

"I almost always end up getting extras but it feels very unfulfilling. I see a couple of dancers outside of the club, one where I don’t have to pay, I just take her to dinner and then fun time. I think she’s more into it than I am."

"it’s starting to get to the point where it feels like expensive masturbation."

I'm at the same stage as you...on an extended hiatus from strip clubbing because I kept leaving the club unfulfilled and out a few hundo. If you're paying with dinner rather than dinero, same thing. If you're good looking, get out there and crush some puss. Emotional intimacy makes the sex better too.