Unexpected But Pleasant Surprises

rickdugan
Verified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
Who doesn't like a pleasant surprise when visiting the strip club?

Mine came a few nights ago as I was exiting the club. As I was walking to my car, one of my favorite OTC gals was being dropped off by her loser "fiance." She waited until he drove away, then walked over to me and asked me if I'd like to go elsewhere before she starts her shift. Having already imbibed enough driving whiskey to adequately hold me through the event and the drive home, I gladly agreed and off we went. Good times.

Feel free to share your own stories about a pleasant surprise.

108 comments

Latest

Warrior15
3 years ago
Best surprise to me came about 6 years ago. I was staying in Ft Lauderdale and had an OTC date set with the Cubana that I had seen before. This girl may be the Best BJ I had ever had. But that was not the surprise. She texts me about an hour before she is supposed to come to my hotel. She says she has a problem and a solution to the problem, but wanted to ask me first. It seems her sister ( actually half sister ) was with her. They both worked at the same strip club and they were driving together that night. My girl and I were going to have dinner, then fun. The sister didn't want to go to her strip club that early.

So my girl asks if she can bring along sister to have dinner and fun with us. So yes, I have had sisters at the same time. The girls were both from Cuba, had the same father but different mothers. Evidently that father had a child from a 3rd woman. Didn't marry any of these mothers. The 3some was AWESOME. Maybe the best ever as both girls were focused on pleasing me. They weren't having sex with each other. Just pleasing me.

Funniest part of the evening. My girl is the one that gives the fantastic BJs. She's on her knees in front of me while I"m making out with her sister. I unload right down her throat. My girl swallows it down as she has done before. But then she realizes she just did that in front of her sister. She runs to the bathroom faking like she still has the jism in her month and pretends to spit it out in the toilet. She didn't want Sister to know that she swallows. I found that amusing. I didn't spoil her secret although I think Sister could tell. Oh Cuba.
CJKent_band
3 years ago
Pics or it didn’t happen.

:D
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Rick Dugan is going to get busted for drunken diving, and the sooner, the better.

His women are always PL's.

https://tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=7654…

SJG
rickdugan
3 years ago
I knew there was a reason why I had SJG on ignore for so many years.

Son, a stripper who hasn't been tempted by a large cash payment to take the next step is simply one who hasn't realized her full earning potential yet. Someday, if you're ever actually able to overcome your autism long enough to deal with a real life girl, you'll understand a bit better. ;)
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
I understand Dugan that you are full of it. I don't mean that your stories are not true, I mean that you are just a windbag.

SJG
skibum609
3 years ago
Drunk driving was a sport in the 1948 Olympics.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Zero legal tolerance for drunk driving today. And enforcement might not be limited to sworn LE.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
LMAO rickdugan at least is actually having a real stripper encounter.

If anyone around here is a windbag about talking about strippers, it's san_jose_creep. All he does is talk about it but he NEVER has an actual encounter to report.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Sirlapdance, I know how to deal with Trolls and Zombies face 2 face.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
san_jose_creep you clearly also know how to deflect. 😂

It's highly ironic you call anyone a "windbag" since no one comes close to your OT posts, your total posts, and your complete LACK of actually interacting with a stripper. You are TUSCL's #1 windbag! 😂😂😂
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
At least rickdugan is creating threads about actual stripper stories. You should take note of it.
Uprightcitizen
3 years ago
I thought SJG was an advocate of "The System" pre-covid. Must be the new meds 💊
nicespice
3 years ago
The horrible thing about growing up with the internet is reading the thread title and thinking of all the “surprise butt secks” memes popular in the mid late 2000s 🤐
Uprightcitizen
3 years ago
Nice just made this thread lol'erific. Props to LDK tho you are a psychological laser beam attached to sharks.
Uprightcitizen
3 years ago
LDK meaning SLA apologies
gothamyte
3 years ago
Pleasant surprise #1: Finding money on the parking lot ground while I was leaving the strip club for the night on the way to my car. I wanna say it was a $20 bill--but I can't remember; it was a handful of years ago.

Pleasant surprise #2: So, my #1, HOF/ATF aka favorite stripper ever was dancing naked on-stage. (She was such a beauty.) Anyway, the usual thick crowd of dudes surrounded her as she was bending-over spreading her pussy, opening her legs, etc. Suddenly she stops and tells the crowd to back up and part in the middle, as if she needed space or was suddenly going to get off the stage and walk directly into and among us crowd of dudes. Or something. I'm watching this from all the way in the back of the room because there were so many dudes crowded around her and I've seen her do this plenty of times. Dudes immediately complied, yelling, "Back up! Back up!" And "Make a part! Move! Make a part!" It takes a few moments. When it's done, to her liking, she yells out to me all the way in the back and motions with her finger that she wanted me to come up front. I do. Then she went back to bending over and spreading her legs and pussy etc. Yo, she made the crowd back up and part a line just for me; even though I didn't ask her or need it. So cool of her.

We didn't ever talk about it, but I think she truly enjoyed the way I used to look at her. I was such a fanboy for her and she appreciated it.

And yeah, the crowd was pissed that they just parted and made space for me. But they didn't want to be too rude to me, especially since she showed special treatment to me at that one moment. Pleasant surprise. Again, I didn't ask for her to do that. I was just way in the back watching, chillin'. It was not necessary for her to do that.
rickdugan
3 years ago
===> "I understand Dugan that you are full of it. I don't mean that your stories are not true, I mean that you are just a windbag."

Are you saying that an anonymous Internet forum dedicated to strip clubbing isn't the place to swap stories about stripper adventures? If not here, then where? I certainly can't tell these stories in more respectable circles, lol.

Indeed the endless political posts and other non-club related crap that you post is exactly why I had you on ignore for years. If you don't actually have anything on topic to discuss then perhaps you should find a forum more suited to your interests.
RTP
3 years ago
Last week I went to my local club and saw an old favorite that I thought left the business about 3 years ago. Well, she actually did leave, but she was back and looking very good. I am never one to use the term Favorite or all time favorite as that is just not the way I roll. I like variety and not to get too attached, but this dancer is as close to a favorite as I have had.

We had a very nice reunion, but she told me that she is now sober (not sure what that meant because she did seem a bit high to me) and that she is not F'ing OTC. Her dances in VIP were still pretty good, very good, but not quite up to what they used to be. The cameras may have something to do with that. Anyway, I asked about getting together and she reminded me that she is not F'ing. She then paused and said, well, I guess I could give you a BJ.
Cashman1234
3 years ago
I enjoy the stories from Rick Dugan, Warrior and gothamyte. I enjoy a good strip club story.

I will try to add a decent unexpected strip club experience of my own. This happened close to 16 years ago, and it is still memorable. I was enjoying a night of drinking and spending at a filthy NJ club. It was the usual week night array of naughty dancers parading around the club in bikinis and lingerie. I was getting towards the end of my evening, and it had been uneventful.

I noticed a new dancer with a petite body - and beautiful dark hair. She was wearing a tiny skirt and bra - and she had a large tattoo of roses below her navel. I was very taken by this beauty. I tipped her and asked her to stop by after her stage time was done.

She came and found me at the busy bar quickly after. We sat and chatted as best we could, as she had just come to NJ from Brazil - and this was her first night dancing here. It was a busy bar, and very loud, and yet I was enamored with her beauty. I had left a stack of singles on the bar - and I had completely forgotten my money as we attempted conversation. I asked if she would dance for me upstairs - and she quickly agreed.

The upstairs area was a series of paneled booths - with curtains for privacy - and large upholstered arm chairs. There were no rules enforced up there. If you negotiated full sex - you got full sex. If you negotiated water sports - you got it! The most private booths were filthy as a result.

We get upstairs, and I’m not sure what might happen, as it’s this dancer’s first night in a filthy club. We grab the first open stall - directly at the top of the stairs. I am fully clothed and she remains in her skirt and bra. She straddles me and we begin kissing deeply. This is a nice start and I wasn’t expecting it. She continues kissing me and there is no mention of when the songs end - to keep count.

She removes her bra and skirt and panties, and is now fully nude as we continue to kiss. She opens my pants and she pulls my t-shirt off. Her body against mine feels amazing. She kisses my chest and begins sucking my cock and again it feels amazing. Then she excuses herself and returns with condoms. She covers me up spits in her hand and slips me inside of her tight ass. She rides me perfectly as we continue to kiss, and as I massage her clit and run my hands over her perfect body.

After I cum she pulls the condom off without realizing the mess I made, and jizz flies all over the filthy stall! She cleans me up and cleans the mess off the walls. Then she snuggles up in my arms and kisses me sweetly.

After this I’m still enjoying the feeling of this great experience - and I really don’t know what she’s going to ask for in terms of $$$. She asks if I will stay after she finishes her next set - so we can hang out upstairs. I’m good with that and we get dressed - and we get up and get ready to leave. I pull out $200 and hand it to her. She counts out a few $20’s and she looks at me and somehow we agree it’s enough to have her for the rest of the night.

It was another very nice experience later that night as well. This was totally unexpected. I was drinking like a drunk at that time, and it was one of those experiences when I slowed my drinking for a few hours, so I would actually remember this girl.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
My ATF DS turned out to be the best unexpected and pleasant surprise in my clubbing "life". She was a solid 9, blonde with biggest and best tits I've ever experienced. Huge all natural DDDs. Firm too. Plus, she was high mileage and she let me massage her as she teased my dick for at least 30 min (up to 2 hours) before getting private dances. LDKs were not an issue with her. And she worked the afternoon shift regularly which lined up perfectly to my schedule. Lastly, she never charged over $25 per dance and never expected anything during our massage/tease time.

What started as an exploratory visit to a random stripper that I saw pics of on social media evolved into 4 years of having the nearly "perfect" fave. Hence, she's clearly my ATF DS. Sadly, she's retired now, but it was a good run.

LOL I'm not an extras guy so I only have PG-13 stories.
magicrat
3 years ago
I have shared this before but I had tried multiple times for OTC with my ATF but she always ghosted when we had something set up. I enjoyed being around her ITC so it wasn't a big deal..I had accepted that it wasn't in the cards and just made the most of the situation. One day she asks me "why don't you stay until the end of my shift, we can get something to eat and get a room." Needless to say not something I was expecting. Afterwards we continued to do a few OTC trysts, but mostly ITC.

She's retired now, got multiple degrees post dancing, married the guy she was living with, and had a child. Sometimes you just never know how things are going to turn out.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
I was an advocate of The System (tm).

But that was before I realized how much it all revolved around the denigration of the women, and them never calling until they are behind in the rent, and then on alcohol and intoxicated driving.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
@sam_jose_creep to already have a separate thread regarding your thoughts on The System.

Have you had a recent pleasant surprise from a stripper since you've been a TUSCL member? I'm curious if you've had any join your organization or if you actually experienced an FRMOS in real life with a stripper as per the thread topic.
rickthelion
3 years ago
rick my brother many a pleasant surprise involving a sexy female hairless ape has followed the imbibing of sufficient drivin’ whiskey

The sex is way hotter when you’re driving scares the girl a lil bit. Nothing over the top. Maybe just blow thru a red light on the way to the hotel. A lil sumpin sumpin to get that sexy female all hot.

ROAR!!!
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Rickthelion better watchout, apes still having their hair are learning how to fight back!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypEaGQb6…

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
So over the last week I finally went back to some clubs after a long break of about a year and a half. Call it a self treat for passing some job interviews and getting my resume updated.

I saw an old fave at one club which was great as usual, but the one unpleasant surprise was that the club's dance rates were up by $25. Single dances were $65 and it was $125 for three. What. The. Fuck. This was quoted by my fave and two other strippers. They all stated it was due to COVID and a way to make up for the lost revenue. I negotiated three dances down to $120 but I didn't push it since I've been out of the game for so long.

At the other club is where the pleasant surprise(s) occurred. And it was in part set up by the previous club above. She was a 9-10 blonde. Everything my type. Fine blonde hair, huge blue eyes, perfect C cups, and long legs under an apple ass. Exquisite baby soft skin too. A porcelain Barbie doll. A young Jaime Pressley lookalike. And she just happened to be working a special rare day shift so it was a lucky score to catch her. She had no issues with a little massage time and a good surprise was that she quoted pre-COVID dance rates. I didn't bother to negotiate her $100/3 rate especially after the other club rates. After the massage warm up she proceeded to give me near perfect dances like I like. She did not shy away from my boner and grinded it in multiple ways like only my regular faves know. She wasn't a stick shifter but her pussy on cock grinding was top notch and she let my hands roam and let me control the pace with my hands all over her ass. I edged from the start and LDKed (hard!) on cue halfway into the third song.

In summary, the pleasant surprise was everything about her. After being out of the game so long and finding a near perfect stripper, a 9-10 all natural blonde that grinds like a champ, right away with no real effort to search for her was absolutely a pleasant surprise for a semi retired PL.

And I'm kinda glad she doesn't work day shift often because she'd be too tempting to see too often.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLapDance, everything for you seems to be about mood altering chemicals. There is alcohol, there is marijuana, and then when one of those FemBots descends down on your pants with her moistened outer labia, and leaves a snail trail, you get that endorphin rush.

Mood alternants so that you don't have to face your own sexual frustration.

SJG

Pat Metheny Group
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyVSIexj…
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
@san_jose_creep LOL everything about you is solely typing your thoughts on the internet from a San Jose public library. No real world experience or interactions in anything you say. You live vicariously through TUSCL posts, primarily your own which are pure fantasy.

All of it is clearly a projection of your own sexual frustrations.

Meanwhile, I'm having fun in real life with strippers and my wife. No frustration needed, unlike YOU. 😂

Keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLapDance, head so far up his ass that his spinal cord is tied in a knot. Not actually knowing anything, just shooting his mouth off

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
san_jose_creep, sexual frustrations so pent up and no money to do anything about it. Just typing away from the San Jose public libraries free internet. No woman wants anything to do with him sexually.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLapDance, I had thought that I had dealt with you a year ago. There should be a lot of methane coming up out of the ground right now, because you are well into decomposition. This is always the best way of dealing with a troll.

But since you obviously aren't decomposing, and have somehow been able to claw your way back to the surface, we can safely make a few assumptions. The systems and processes which integrate living things are absent in you. Or to put it another way, I can't kill you because you are already dead.

Some other kind of power is animating you. You are a zombie.

SJG

Joe Bonamassa Official - "I'll Play The Blues For You" - Live At The Greek Theatre
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoX0Olfq…
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
You act like typing a post to TUSCL is actual reality.

LMAO "dealt with me"? Just because we exchanged anonymous posts with each other?

Clearly you live vicariously through TUSCL posts, primarily your own which are pure fantasy.

All of it is clearly a projection of your own sexual frustrations.

Meanwhile, I'm having fun in real life with strippers and my wife. This is in addition to exchanging posts with you.

Keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Yeah, like I said, dividing women into two categories, and believing that that is a male prerogative.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
Yeah, like I said, making strawman arguments and doesn't actually interact with women sexually in real life, so san_jose_creep just posts criticisms on the internet because he's too broke to do anything else with himself.

Keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
^^^ Head up your ass SLD
SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
^^^ Homeless and broke and alone SJG
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Smart enough to never have been like SLD, and enjoying every moment doing the things I want to.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
Keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got.

LMAO you must want to type criticism on the internet above actually going to a strip club. 😂
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD, knowing absolutely nothing, about me, or about anything else.

SJG

Joe Bonamassa Official - "Breaking Up Somebody's Home" - Live At The Greek Theatre
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DxaVOeu…
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
SJG revealing everything to TUSCL about himself, despite his faux "wall of privacy". Can only deflect and react with anger and violence when someone points out his real world (which is homeless and broke in San Jose).
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD not having eyes to see anything, just his own hang over haze, and endorphin rush addiction.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
SJG not having any money to have any sexual fun with a woman, just has his criticism posts which just make him more and more sexually frustrated.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Chemicals, Money, Women, it all the same for SLD, that's just how he is and so he cannot understand that other people are not that way.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
SJG not having any money to have any sexual fun with a woman, just has his criticism posts which just make him more and more sexually frustrated.

Proven over and over again with all his recent posts in this thread.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD, not knowing anything about me or anyone else, but just spending money for chemicals, and for endorphin rushes.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
SJG not having any money to have any sexual fun with a woman, just has his criticism posts which just make him more and more sexually frustrated.

Proven over and over again with all his recent posts in this thread.

Has resorted to repeating himself because he has nothing left to add.

Because he's just a PL poser. Broke one at that.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD, Stupidity -> Money -> Drugs -> Women -> Endorphin Rush, repeat loop. And acting like he knows anything about anyone.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
Has resorted to repeating himself because he has nothing left to add.

Because he's just a PL poser. Broke one at that.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD really is a PI, Pathetic Imbecile

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
san_jose_guy really can only post insults and criticisms on TUSCL because he has absolutely nothing to post about a real world stripper interaction. It's beyond pathetic.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
LOL san_jose_creep as per the thread topic, what's your recent unexpected but pleasant surprise with a stripper?

Do you have anything to add with respect to this? Based on a RECENT stripper encounter?

(🦗🦗🦗)
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
I can show you how my f2f life is protected. The methods I use are no different from those used by the Central Intelligence Agency to protect its operations. They and I are one.

I can post all kinds of stuff about my life here, because it is online, not f2f, so I am the one who decides where to draw the line. So no, I don't take questions about my own life, and I am not interested in gaining approval.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
Yeah @san_jose_creep so you really aren't interested in posting per the thread topic.

FYI no one is requiring you to gain approval by this. It's simply a question of whether or not you will post to the thread as per THE FUCKING TOPIC!

Instead, as per your usual MO, you'd rather criticize others that are simply posting per the thread topic and go on and on about tangential arguments.

In other words you are a keyboard cowboy that doesn't actually have any real world encounters with strippers or women in general.

And it's obvious that you use a "wall of privacy" to hide behind your lack of real world experiences.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy.

It's all you got.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLapDance everything you post is tangential, the attempt to create metanarrative to force the discussion down to your imbecilic level. Its worse than that, because you are a zombie.

You have ignore, and you have thread by thread ignore, use them you mother fucker!

SJG

Peter Frampton - Do You Feel Like We Do (Live in Detroit)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVCWaWFm…
georgmicrodong
3 years ago
Had similar surprise as you, that I've mentioned here before. She was already there when I drove up, outside smoking. She didn't want to work, but her boyfriend dropped her off and left. When I suggested we go find something else to do, she quite readily agreed even though I wasn't offering anywhere near what she would have made had she stayed. But we had a good time, and then I took her home. I guess my contribution was "enough".
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
^^^^^ You mean you didn't ask her to LDK you? And you mean you were driving your car without consuming alcohol?

And no, the girl couldn't possible have just opened up to you and been herself. She must have been playing on your naivete. A stripper will never do anything with you without dispassionate economic calculations. Obviously you have zero experience with women. And the idea that she may have liked the idea that you would just fuck her, that is ridiculous.

:)

SJG

SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
"SirLapDance everything you post is tangential, the attempt to create metanarrative to force the discussion down to your imbecilic level. Its worse than that, because you are a zombie."

^^^ @san_jose_creep you are a dumbass. Go reread our post history in this thread. You'll find that I simply posted, PER THE THREAD TOPIC, about my real world encounter with a hot blonde 9-10 stripper. The encounter was a pleasant surprise, again as per the thread topic.

And you know what YOU did at that point? You criticized it and took it to your own imbecilic level. This is where the tangential arguments started. They started with you.

And it's because you really don't have any real world stripper encounters as I've stated. You just proved it again. And you just proved that you'd rather make criticism posts and argue about tangents and make strawman arguments than actually SHARE A REAL UNEXPECTED SURPRISE encounter with a stripper. Again, it's because you have none to share. You're homeless and broke.


"You have ignore, and you have thread by thread ignore, use them you mother fucker!

SJG"

^^^ I'm fully aware of all the ignore features of this site. I will use them whenever I want.

In this case, I don't want to. I'm happy with exchanging posts with you. I know that I've actually contributed to this thread as per the thread topic and I like the overall thread.

And I don't mind reading your own posts. You actually prove everything I state with them so again I don't mind not ignoring you.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD, you are just trying to pull this thread down to your own level of imbecility.

Terminating a Troll is the easiest thing in the world to do. But what does one do when that Troll then claws itself up out of the grave because is has turned into a zombie?

SJG

WE SHALL NEVER SURRENDER speech by Winston Churchill (We Shall Fight on the Beaches)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_LncVne…
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
@san_jose_creep you are the one not even posting as per the thread topic so it's clearly you that's derailed things here.

FYI I've shared TWO unexpected but pleasant surprise stories with strippers. By my count it's

2 for Sirlapdancealot

ZERO for san_jose_creep

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
No, SLD, you are trying to start negative meta-narrative, and when you could just be using ignore or thread ignore.

They say that the best thing to do with a zombie is just a high temperature cremation, cell by cell burn his protoplasm down to carbon.

SJG

The Arsenal Of Democracy (December 29th 1940)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_LncVne…
Call.Me.Ishmael
3 years ago
^^^ Has never seen a vagina.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
No san_jose_guy you were the one with all kinds of criticism about me and my on topic posts. It's clear in the thread history. I just went back and reread the thread and yup, for sure, you went meta over my on topic posts.

And you continue arguing with me and deflecting from the fact that you have nothing to contribute to the thread topic outside of tangents.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLapDance, with a lot of things I do not see them the way you do. I know that sometimes women really love to be fucked. And I know that things like taking them to dinner or making a contribution will help with this. It is also fun. It does show care and concern, and respect. You see them differently, but that is mainly because of the attitudes you bring to them.

But look, you can keep defecating on this board, or you can just use ignore. Or you can go crawl back into your grave and into your coffin, and pull the lid back on.


A blast furnace hot enough to melt pig iron
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blast_furn…

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pig_iron

Puddling Furnace, this should do the job! Want it hot enough to melt pure iron!
Open Hearth Furnace
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Open_heart…


SJG

The Arsenal Of Democracy (December 29th 1940)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oI-xc7X…
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
# of stories posted per the thread topic...

SirLapdancealot = 2

san_jose_creep = ZERO

And you continue arguing with me, insulting me, and deflecting from the fact that you have nothing to contribute to the thread topic outside of tangents.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
I have told you that my f2f life is private. I can post on this forum because it is online instead of f2f, so I am the one who decides where to draw the line.

Really I think it best if you just crawl back into your gave and your coffin and pull the lid back on.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
# of stories posted per the thread topic...

SirLapdancealot = 2

san_jose_creep = ZERO

And you continue arguing with me, insulting me, and deflecting from the fact that you have nothing to contribute to the thread topic outside of tangents.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
2800 deg F, melting point of pure Iron
https://www.americanelements.com/melting…

At that point it won't matter if you are already dead.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
# of stories posted per the thread topic...

SirLapdancealot = 2

san_jose_creep = ZERO

And you continue arguing with me, insulting me, and deflecting from the fact that you have nothing to contribute to the thread topic outside of tangents.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLap, I have never tried to make myself into an imbecile. So I don't look at my life experiences in the ways you seem to look at your own. Rather, I find the ways that you look at things to be an absurdity.

SJG

Heart - "Barracuda" (1977)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeMvMNpv…

at Cal Jam 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QkmmDvk…

Robin Trower live 2005
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wkkscG0…
Call.Me.Ishmael
3 years ago
SJG said "SirLap, I have never tried to make myself into an imbecile."

That's actually true. For you, being an imbecile is effortless.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
"SirLap, I have never tried to make myself into an imbecile. So I don't look at my life experiences in the ways you seem to look at your own. Rather, I find the ways that you look at things to be an absurdity.

SJG"

^^^ @san_jose_creep see how you just focused on insulting me and dragging the conversation into a meta about me?

And then you have the AUDACITY to accuse me of the same imbecilic shit that you do?

HYPOCRITE!!!

That's exactly what I'm getting at. Rather than participate in the thread topic, which is to share actual stripper encounters in real life that were unexpected and pleasant surprises, you'd rather deflect, criticize, and insult others.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLap, you are the one who goes meta anytime anyone posts anything which does not fit with your Circle-Jerk Imbecile Mentality. You are a Zombie!


https://ptable.com/?lang=en#Properties/M…

2800 deg F, hot enough not just to melt pig iron, cast iron, or steel alloys, hot enough to melt pure elemental iron. Best way to deal with a Zombie!

https://www.britannica.com/technology/st…

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
# of stories posted per the thread topic...

SirLapdancealot = 2

san_jose_creep = ZERO

And you continue arguing with me, insulting me, and deflecting from the fact that you have nothing to contribute to the thread topic outside of tangents.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
rickthelion
3 years ago
Can you damn dirty apes frickin’ relax and get back to the true purpose of this thread: praising the ricks.

Just tell me and the dugan that we’re great. It will give you an enormous sense of well being. ROAR!!!
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
^^^^^ I am afraid that the Ricks would like nothing better than to have everyone reduced to being a circle jerker. That way they can economically harvest us.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
"I am afraid that the Ricks would like nothing better than to have everyone reduced to being a circle jerker. That way they can economically harvest us.

SJG"

^^^ I am afraid that san_jose_creep just went meta with this post as usual. The same guy that accuses other of going meta and gets butthurt about it when they do.

Again it's because he has no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So he keeps typing like a keyboard cowboy. It's all he's got. 🤪
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLap, my f2f life is private. You know nothing about me.

And you are the one who gets butthurt when anyone posts anything which is outside of your circle jerk reality.

You need this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUGB0zUl…

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
LOL san_jose_creep I know you don't go to strip clubs and don't have any recent stripper encounters.

I know you're homeless and use the San Jose public library for internet.

And LMAO I know this through your own posts and your posting habits!

I don't need to be f2f either. You've given me all this knowledge about you through your own posts!

And I've never been butthurt about any TUSCL post. I enjoy all of them and don't take TUSCL seriously. I use TUSCL for a daily laugh. And your posts to me are hilarious. 😂😂😂

# of stories posted per the thread topic...

SirLapdancealot = 2

san_jose_creep = ZERO

And you continue arguing with me, insulting me, and deflecting from the fact that you have nothing to contribute to the thread topic outside of tangents.

Again it's because you have no real world stripper or strip club experiences to share.

So keep typing keyboard cowboy. It's all you got. 🤪
Cashman1234
3 years ago
It’s become obvious there is a TUSCL for SJG - and a TUSCL for those who actually go to strip clubs. The TUSCL for SJG is him posting discussions and commenting on his own discussions. The other TUSCL is where we discuss things like humans.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
I've said it before and I'll say it again...TUSCL is san_jose_creep's escape from his reality. His own personal defense mechanism. He often criticizes others for escapism but it's just him projecting. In reality he's the one being the most escapist. On TUSCL he wants to be san_jose_guy, a dude that has no problems getting stripper whores to fall in love with him. That's his escape. On TUSCL, as san_jose_guy, he's got it all figured out. How to get them kissing, how to pay them, how they'll react to his expert moves, and ultimately how to make them a civilian girlfriend that lets you pump loads into her toda la noche.

This is all his own "meta" over his own destitute life. His escape from reality.

And so if you break up this fantasy with him, you are ruining his escape. He's no longer that dude I just described. He's back to reality.

This is also why he bumps his own threads and it doesn't matter if others participate or not. He welcomes it for sure, but it isn't necessary. All that is necessary is for him to be "san_jose_guy" while he's posting.

LOL it's also why he has to sign every single post with "SJG". It's completely unnecessary and a waste of energy, but he's compelled to do it. It lets him literally "see" that dude, san_jose_guy, like he's a real person even outside of TUSCL.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD, You are already showing signs of decomposition. I can't figure out what you use as your chemical energy source, except maybe self-digestion. Go back to your grave.

It will make things go easier for you. You have many cycles of birth and death ahead of you, but at least you might avoid having to reincarnate as a cock roach.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
^^^ sam_jose_creep's anger towards me here is because once again I broke up his fantasy. His meta and escape from his real world. He literally wants to obliterate me from the boards because of it. 🧟‍♂️
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLapdance, you have IGNORE, but you don't use it.

So we have the next best option for you, a cell by cell burn down at 2800 deg F.

We can probably find what we need right here:
https://www.thomasnet.com/products/open-…

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
^^^ sam_jose_creep's anger towards me here is because once again I broke up his fantasy. His meta and escape from his real world. He literally wants to obliterate me from the boards because of it. 🧟‍♂️
wallanon
3 years ago
LOL...I wouldn't have even read that if Lapdancelot hadn't pointed it out. I think saying that you should disintegrate is more than obliterating you from a message board.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
@wall I get what you're saying but you have to understand that when san_jose_creep is on TUSCL he is literally living the fantasy of being the san_jose_guy persona on the boards itself. He's 'in character'. TUSCL is literally a fantasy world for him since he cannot actually go to strip clubs or AMPs. And so in his mind he is "seeing" me as SirLapdancealot a zombie coming at him over and over again. He's so nuts that the lines of TUSCL and reality are blurred.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLap, that endorphin rush from ejaculation is what heroin and morphine try to mimic.

You would do better in the Underground Circle Jerk Room. See that steel hatch out in the parking lot? Just go out and give them the pass phrase and they will open it, then you can descend down the ladder to the center of the circular floor. From there I'm sure you will already know what to do.

I'm sure you already know the pass phrase too, "Women are superfluous".

SJG
TFP
3 years ago
Damn. I don't want to go back to business closures, mask mandates, and all that BS from our first encounter with COVID in early 2020. But this thread right here reminds me of the one good thing from the COVID restrictions: silencing SJG on TUSCL by taking away the only internet he can access. He is absolutely the worst troll. Icee, Desertscrub, and that dual profile fucker from SCL Cedrick/Sera69 have nothing on this annoying ass prick.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
And you TFP are fighting to be the greatest troll of them all, so you think. But you won't be able to best SLD, he is not even alive, he is a zombie.

SJG
TFP
3 years ago
It's cool SJG. The bright side to your posts is that they end right when the library closes daily.

I'm not trying to argue with you or anything. Just reminiscing about the 16 months when you couldn't post and it wasn't necessary to put 15 different threads on ignore. Or watch you incessantly go back and forth with SLD. Good times.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
TFP, you do have IGNORE and THREAD IGNORE available to you right now. And as far as knowing anything about me, my f2f life is private. I only make limited disclosures when it will help to illustrate a particular point. So I don't take questions about my personal life. I have very sensitive ongoing responsibilities.

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
Yup @TFP he's usually off TUSCL by 6pm which is when the library closes.

Here are the San Jose public library hours so you can expect san_jose_creep to post during the same times.

https://www.sjpl.org/locations
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SLD, if your bosses at the nuclear power plant catch you jerking off, there will be hell to pay:

https://www.energy.gov/sites/default/fil…

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
LOL @san_jose_creep don't let the librarians see you rubbing your crotch looking at Tijuana street whore pics:

https://tuscl.net/photo.php?id=4151
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
SirLap,

You can't treat the Unemployment Office just like it were the Underground Circle Jerk Room. You'll get busted.

SJG
TheeOSU
3 years ago
Lolol
TheeOSU
3 years ago
It's obvious that your time off the internet didn't improve your wit. Creep!
TFP
3 years ago
Yeah. Same stale ass jokes and cringe worthy comments about nuclear waste and other absolutely retarded unfunny shit that only he would think of in a flame war.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
san_jose_creep,

You can't treat TUSCL just like it were the real world. You'll get exacerbated sexual frustrations.

SirLapdancealot
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
" treat TUSCL just like it were the real world"

You just described yourself and the rest of the circle jerkers to a tee.

SJG
TheeOSU
3 years ago
"Damn. I don't want to go back to business closures, mask mandates, and all that BS from our first encounter with COVID in early 2020. But this thread right here reminds me of the one good thing from the COVID restrictions: silencing SJG on TUSCL by taking away the only internet he can access."


Yeah, just think that what are now the good ol days were as recent as a couple weeks ago, then the creep reappeared, sigh.
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
"You just described yourself and the rest of the circle jerkers to a tee."

LOL san_jose_creep while most of us are spending and getting our rocks off with strippers in real life and then posting about it on TUSCL, you're sitting at the library left only to reading about it.

LMAO don't get caught jerking off to the latest juicebox thread.
san_jose_guy
3 years ago
Did you hear about what happened when SirLap tried to tie his own shoes?

They had to call out the Fire Dept to get him untangled.

So now he has gone back to just letting his wife tie them

SJG
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
@san_jose_creep well played, good sir! Because my beautiful wife ties an unbreakable knot, if you will. And she's got great hands. They've rocked my world many times. 🥰
TFP
3 years ago
Gee, no more posts for the day from SJG? Pity.

Anyhow, I guess I'll finally contribute to the thread. One unexpected surprise that stands out is when I went to a local SF club to check out a dancer I saw on TUSCL. She was actually the first person from these forums that I ever met face to face. Anyhow, turns out her prices were too high for my modest income. But then as luck would have it, I ended up seeing a girl who used to work at another club right around the corner. She gave me probably the best experience I've ever had in an SF strip club. And she was able to repeat that performance, for much less than the TUSCL dancer would. Good times!
nicespice
3 years ago
Lol I guess I’ll contribute too.

There’s more than one story, but the time I was in Colorado, and somebody walked up to my stage. I said I was from Texas, and he was excited and we chatted about our hometowns, he handed over 4 poker chips with the club logo on it, and walked out the club. Asked the bouncer if that was actually worth money, and it was worth $400 I got to redeem.

…why can’t Texans in actual Texas be like that!?
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
I gotta admit, nicespice was truly an unexpected surprise in my PL life. On many levels. Her coming to Portland and meeting up with me at my home club several times were oh so pleasant. I never expected to meet a TUSCL stripper and yet somehow I did, and to top it off she ended up being my unicorn DS. 🤗🦄
SirLapdancealot
3 years ago
^^^ literally AND figuratively...

https://tuscl.net/photo.php?id=2729
You must be a member to leave a comment.Join Now
Got something to say?
Start your own discussion