So I'm in sensitivity training (it doesn't matter why lol) and ran across this notion of codeswitching. Regular folk would say it's acting or sounding different depending on who's around and the situation. For those heavy into clubbing and whatnot, how much if any codeswitching do you see among the monger crowd?
If codeswitching is what I think it is, then that is something people do all the time. For example, if you visit your grandmother you are not the same person as when you hang out with your friends.
The most obvious example in a strip club is how pretty young strippers treat you in the club versus how they treat you in the real world. In the real world, they would just ignore an old guy like me. I never went to clubs when I was the same age as these girls so I wasn't able to see if their interactions with me would have been different back then and, if so, how. Judging from how the girls act around younger customers,they seem to have more to talk about with them and like hanging out and socializing with them more. If they do spend time with me, it's usually because they think I might have more money to spend.
Beside in the club versus outside the club, I also think strippers try to read a customer to see what he wants. They can go from sexy girl to friendly girl. I've even seen strippers try to mother guys. One time a regular offered to sew up some holes in my coat pockets. You can
My previous comment just posted without me hitting the post button before I finished. I never had that happen before. My last sentence would have been you can also see girls switching by educational or class level, such as the smart girl who pretends to be dumb with some customers.
I always assumed code switching applied to fake accents or switching out vocabulary based on who you are around at the moment. I never heard it applied to large scale changes in behavior, but then again I do everything in my power brain dump sensitivity training the moment I get signed off for the class.
I've heard of this. Basically, virtually everyone you know perceives a different version of you than everyone else does. And it's not always conscious.
Wait a minute. Wait just a minute. Are you trying to tell us that our behavior changes based upon the situation and audience? I don't buy it, no siren. That concept is just too revolutionary to be believable.
In fact, I was just thinking that it's time to hit up my kid's religious ed teacher up for some OTC. After all, that's what we're supposed to do with hotties, right?
My SC buddy and I developed a code word that we only (need to) use in a club.
If one of us gets (or has had) a lousy dance with a stripper and she comes over to ask my buddy if he also wants a dance, I need to tell him it's a bad idea without sounding like an asshole by saying something like "Dude, she's awful! Stay away!" I don't want to hurt or insult a dancer just because I didn't like her dancing. She's entitled to do or not do whatever she wants in a dance. But I have to look out for my buddy, too.
So our code is to say she was great but use a term about space in the process. Ex: "She put me in orbit," or "It was out of this world," or "She's the brightest star in the sky." Then my buddy can "decide" that he's not ready for another dance right now and can politely decline.
To Nina's point, it looks like there's a linguistic definition and a social interpretation of the concept. I'm no expert in it. That's what the Google said.
Being very bored and bemused listening to these videos while reading TUSCL, all the discussions here about who knows what about the hobby (and how each of us goes about our business) came to mind. Does that moment of empathy count as a breakthrough?
Its very hard to actually sound convincing using local slang and accents. If anything I allow the worst aspects of my Boston accent come out more fully when I deal with people who aren't from here. I suppose it is based on with whom you're speaking to, but I find that some people see it as pandering and don't like it. I would think it would be easier to just listen for a couple of minutes and then inconspicuously feed the other person's thoughts, likes and positions back to them.
Well I'm thinking more along the lines of a black person from an inner city who grew up using AAVE or a Latino from The Bronx with a thick Spanish and NY accent. To survive in the corporate world they have to speak completely differently than when they're with the friends or family. Those are examples of [linguistic] code switching.
Call it code switching or mirroring or whatever, you hang around a locale long enough you start to pick up their mannerisms and accents. When I lived in small town Florida I sounded like a southerner, when I spent a lot of time in Canada like a Canuck... Eh?
I suppose I am somewhat guilty of something similar to code-switching in that I have a very diverse clientele and use different words and phrases with them all. Not trying to curry favor, more of a making sure they understand what I am saying. To one client I might say: "she is acting this way due to a combination of lack of self-esteem and fear that your successes make her less desirable to you, so she is trying to bring you down as an easier way of bringing herself up". Same circumstances, different client: "She is a jealous loser and wants you to be a loser, so that she feels better about herself".
I think its code switching if I want a reaction from them. I do it because I need my clients to understand what I am saying and many ppl are too embarrassed to admit to words which they don't know lol.
Your clients need to understand that so you can get their business. We can see by your posts that you couldn't give a shit about their actual situation, it's just about money for you. You code switch to make yourself a better lawyer.
If I acted with the same attitude and mannerisms I have at the club around my mom or grandparents, I'd be disowned. Lol.
@Longball, the same exact thing happened to me when I was traveling semi-regularly up to Toronto and Montreal. It was either talking like a Canuck or having a barely noticeable Quebec French dialect. After two years of flying up, it just happened without me thinking about it.
I have had to put up with mandatory sensativity training, anti-bias training, and various other B.S. training over the years, but this is the first time I heard of the term. Can't tell from the article if they are saying its good or bad, but personally who cares. 99% of the people taking any mandatory training just nod their heads, and say what the trainer wants to hear, and ignore it once the class is over. The one percent who really are into it, are the ones that personally should be banned from any position above janitor, because they are too stupid to have any position of authority.
24 comments
Latest
The most obvious example in a strip club is how pretty young strippers treat you in the club versus how they treat you in the real world. In the real world, they would just ignore an old guy like me. I never went to clubs when I was the same age as these girls so I wasn't able to see if their interactions with me would have been different back then and, if so, how. Judging from how the girls act around younger customers,they seem to have more to talk about with them and like hanging out and socializing with them more. If they do spend time with me, it's usually because they think I might have more money to spend.
Beside in the club versus outside the club, I also think strippers try to read a customer to see what he wants. They can go from sexy girl to friendly girl. I've even seen strippers try to mother guys. One time a regular offered to sew up some holes in my coat pockets. You can
In fact, I was just thinking that it's time to hit up my kid's religious ed teacher up for some OTC. After all, that's what we're supposed to do with hotties, right?
If one of us gets (or has had) a lousy dance with a stripper and she comes over to ask my buddy if he also wants a dance, I need to tell him it's a bad idea without sounding like an asshole by saying something like "Dude, she's awful! Stay away!" I don't want to hurt or insult a dancer just because I didn't like her dancing. She's entitled to do or not do whatever she wants in a dance. But I have to look out for my buddy, too.
So our code is to say she was great but use a term about space in the process. Ex: "She put me in orbit," or "It was out of this world," or "She's the brightest star in the sky." Then my buddy can "decide" that he's not ready for another dance right now and can politely decline.
No harm, no hurt feelings, no drama.
I definitely see what you did there. You showed that thinking is not your strong suit. 😉
Being very bored and bemused listening to these videos while reading TUSCL, all the discussions here about who knows what about the hobby (and how each of us goes about our business) came to mind. Does that moment of empathy count as a breakthrough?
A lot of people in the workforce do this as a survival technique if they have certain colloquial accents. It is not weakness, it is smart.
@Longball, the same exact thing happened to me when I was traveling semi-regularly up to Toronto and Montreal. It was either talking like a Canuck or having a barely noticeable Quebec French dialect. After two years of flying up, it just happened without me thinking about it.
Dancers do it a lot. And the way certain types of customers talk is sometimes joked about. Although the girls making the jokes usually sound......