Hi, again!!

Welcome back to TUSCL.

Sorry, but I don't see how I an say anything about the situation you have described.

SJG

We're not there to be able to judge if he's acting inappropriately - could be many things (e.g. shit going on his life and taking it out on you; or he's just an ahole that takes you for granted, etc) - at the end of the day you are not in a committed-relationship so one needs to determine if the pros outweigh the cons - it's often hard to stay w/ the same-person and not start to get on each other's nerves but either party stays in for x,y,or z, reason.

One thing I've seen is guys that are getting the pussy handed to them not wanting to give-up that convenience even though they've tired of the girl to some extent, and then they start to act out b/c they're kinda tired of the girl but don't wanna give up the steady supply of pussy.

But again - my opinions should def be taken w/ the proverbial grain-of-salt since I am not seeing things firsthand.

Could also be he using you as a rebound and is still getting over the previous breakup and he still hasn't fully dealt w/ it or it not fully behind him yet?

Also, not many guys are level-headed at 23 especially if they are handed pussy free of commitment.

A little background...his now ex-girlfriend dumped him because he sent me multiple texts saying how he wants to fuck me. Not sure if that changes anything, but I think you MIGHT have nailed it when you said

“One thing I've seen is guys that are getting the pussy handed to them not wanting to give-up that convenience even though they've tired of the girl to some extent, and then they start to act out b/c they're kinda tired of the girl but don't wanna give up the steady supply of pussy.“

Thanks for the feedback. I’m probably just going to “ghost” him.

Lol. He is 23. That is probably all you need to realize. Trust me, you can always find a replacement. If he is treating you bad, then absolutely GHOST him. If it is the “fuck” that keeps you with him, then you need to venture out because there are MULTITUDES more out there that will rock your world! Any of the TUSCL family would love to show you how the world truly works w/regards to this subject! We will treat you like a princess and we will not expect a single thing in return other than for the night we play.

Other than FUN for the night we play.

@LolitaLove;

“People learn how to treat you based on what you accept from them.”

If any person is and continues to be disrespectful to you, you should kindly and firmly tell them you are not going to tolerate that behavior and you may need to limit your time with them as much as possible or even cut ties altogether.

And yes you are 100% right he is an immature a..hole, saying he wants to fuck you while in a relationship. You should not accept this type of guys in your life.

I get that you probably are attracted to the “bad boy” types, but you need to choose better partners, sexuality and otherwise.

Good look ghosting him. Stay strong and don’t let him in your life ever again, he should be dead to you.

You deserve to have the kind of guy who treats you with respect.

“People learn how to treat you based on what you accept from them.”

As simple and straightforward as it gets

@Lolita. Amazing avatar picture, different than when you were posting before, but same 'oh-wow' behind. Welcome back. Yes, put him 'behind' you if he's not appreciative. (If the opinion of an old married guy means anything) It ain't gonna work without respect. And not much fun either.

Not really worth-it if one is not getting treated right - sometimes one cuts the other person some slack b/c the person may be going thru some stuff but if they refuse to admit their wrong-doing and/or don't try to remedy the situation, then IME the juice is not often worth the squeeze.

You’re an enabler. Now grow a set and show us your tits!!

Sounds like he's treating you like he treated his Ex-GF. And you know how that turned out...

IMHO, No one under 25 should be looking for a committed relationship. He's still looking to see how often he can drop a load and how many places he can drop it. Give him a map to another strip club and move on.

As for your part on this, I hope you can find a path forward where you instinctively know you deserve respect and honesty from everyone - whether you are fucking them or not. Once you get comfortable knowing that relationships (even fuck-toy relationships) require mutual respect, you will never even consider a guy like this again.

@Nidan111 Very true. I’ve had fuck buddies in the past that treat me so well (like I’m their gf almost) yet we could still understand what we were, even talk about the other people we were currently having sex with to each other -like a true friends with benefits- if that makes sense. I think I need to aim towards an older age range. Honestly, I get along with older guys better anyways.

@CJkent Right??? I doubt myself often, BUT c’mon....he was consistently informing me he wanted me while in a long term relationship. That should probably say enough right there!! Unfortunately, I don’t have many friends and desire some form of affection, so I accepted it. I could look elsewhere, but I’m at work/taking care of my son majority of the time. Social media, internet, websites, etc. is the only other way really for me to meet ppl.

@papi_chulo yeah, true that. Not going to waste my time on him.

@Meat72 you have to show me yours first ;)

@herbtcat agreed!! How ironic...the friends with benefits that I had/have, his name is Herbert and he’s awesome! He’s also a year older. Treats me with respect and like a friend! Yeah, anything under 25 is pretty young, especially for a guy (mentally).

Have you considered trying to be a sugar baby?

Hi Lolita. Honestly you need to try stripping already. You get to meet fuck buddies who actually pay you too! And treat you really good. Why put up with a douche, when you can land a high roller! You gon be good girl.

Your avatar is fantastic.

That's all I've got.

@LolitaLove

First I should welcome you back to TUSCL. This site has been made brighter by your beautiful sweet presence.

I am doing well, and don’t know how everyone else is doing. I am happy to hear from you again.

Back to the topic; You were not put on this earth to endure aggression and/or disrespect.

It doesn’t matter where you interact with people, work, school, home, strip clubs, bars, libraries, hospitals, markets, the street, the Internet, stores, heaven and hell, etc etc etc.

It is essential to make very clear to ourselves and others what we will and what we will not tolerate within any human relationship.

What we can do is to learn how to establish and communicate our limits and the consequences for people who cross them.

Your should stabling your limits and don’t allow people to disrespect you ever.

Think of your son, you are going to be teaching him to be responsible and respectful and to make sure his personal space and his limits are respected.

Remember the best thing we can do in this life is to be happy and do good to others and to ourselves,

Good night and sweet dreams.

Well if he’s a co-worker, then ghosting probably isn’t for the best. Just start being distant. He will bounce back and just be “busy”. Don’t give him the satisfaction of drama. (Unless you would enjoy the drama. Then sleep with his best friend or something.)

Oh, and best to search for a new job. Then you can ghost for good. 😁

Grammar clarification: when he bounces back and tries to hang out with you, then you pretend to be busy. (Or ideally actually being busy doing something else)

^ Hi there Lolita good to see ya again, nicespice gave you some good pointers, my favorite is sleep with his best friend, but only if his boss (you did say he was a co-worker) is unavailable 🤯

i’m staying outta this.

(i’m just to frikin old for her to be a fuck buddy. )

^ Your only as old as the babe who's your fuck buddy 😁

"Have you considered trying to be a sugar baby?"

How are we all supposed to get lap dances from her if PaulDrake is hogging her all to himself? Wasn't she here before because she was thinking about stripping?

He's probably a fucking idiot, but then I've also never been in that sort of arrangement before. The nice thing is if all you want is to get laid, shit, your options are limitless.

Hi Lolita - a friend with benefits or fuck buddy is supposed to low or zero stress. If something about it doesn't feel right you should just wind it down. No need to tip toe around it and hopefully he would be man enough to not make things awkward at work.

Is that your soapy booty in the photo? Sounds like your 23 year old fuck buddy is not appreciative of your assets. As the old saying goes, "you don't know what you've got till its gone."

Is it possible that your definition of rude/disrespectful is so unique to you that he is simply clueless about how you want to be treated? This seems unlikely but I have known women who expected to be worshiped and showered with gifts as a sign of respect, and often failed to reciprocate with similar effort in a relationship.

Have you given him any feedback about his behavior. If he is unwilling to hear and acknowledge corrective feedback or unwilling to make an effort to treat you better, then dump him and move on. If he is treating you poorly at this stage of a relationship, then just think how he will treat you when the magic of a new sex partner begins to wear off.

I guess I don't understandwhy anyone would put up wioth neing treatesd like shit for more than a day.

Lolita, just dump him. I'll be your fuck buddy. And I won't require any exclusiveness.

Yea the point of being a fuck buddy is all the sex and none of the drama. If he is being a dick bag and he is not bf material then dump his ungrateful ass.

Nice to see you back! ....and your sexy backside

@lolitalove. If you need a FRIEND for you to take these frustrations out with face to face, I’m your huckleberry! 😂

Fucking should be stress free or, at least low stress. There are plenty of other fish in the sea if it’s not.

Thanks everyone for the feedback!! I’m going to drop him.

Realistically, may end up sleeping with him the next time we have a work function and we’ve all been drinking. My only excuse is that this “set-up” is convenient because we’re always around each other and he lives 15 min away from me.....but hell if I find someone else who will fuck me better and be sweet then a drive that is a little farther is well worth it.

I’m only 12 hours away! 😂 😂 😂

The good ones are rarely local 😪

He’s just an a**hole and doesn’t deserve you in my opinion. He’s rude and him being close by is kinda a poor reason to hook up. I’d rather invest in some professional machinery lol.

^^^^ I’ll bring the heavy duty batteries.

lolitalove. i’d like it if you were closer.

Hope you found a better fwb