Late to the game
gawker
Older than dirt
I was in my early 60’s when I started regular clubbing. I pretty quickly hooked up with my ATF and had a kind of SB/SD relationship for almost 10 years. She moved out of state and I spent about 6 months checking out other clubs and other dancers.
I’m now in my mid 70’s and am a widower. I was in a club that was new to me and saw a dancer I’d had a 6 month fling with when my ATF had been away. She got my contact info and I hers. Within a few days she sent me a video of herself in the bathtub with a note asking if I still liked chasing girls like her.
She’s got a couple of kids, is no longer comfortable dancing, but is still a damned good looking woman. I’ve had sex with her 4 or 5 times recently but she’s 47 years younger than I, smokes weed a lot ( which is legal for us), has another “customer” who she’s known for 4 or 5 years, and has spoken of customers (plural). Now my ATF was an extras girl with a capital E on extra. One time I told her it was the best blowjob I ever had and she said, “Oh, everybody says that.”
So with a new and younger dancer I don’t expect exclusivity, but I’d like to have some idea of how much she’s spreading it around to better understand how much I should be spending and to have a better idea as to what her availability should be. Is this a fair area for me to explore? So far she came to my house once and I’ve been to her apartment 5 or 6 times, a couple of them to visit with her babies, the other times for pleasure.
We need to have a conversation about money. To this point it’s been sending her money on CashApp when she asks and about every $300 we get together. Very hit or miss and imprecise. At times I don’t want to get to a point where I’m spending every free cent on one girl, but other times it’s so much better than trying to line up a dancer for OTC. I really am struggling with this issue. And then while writing this my ATF texted me saying she’s about 75% sure that she’s moving back. Maybe I’ll just try celibacy.
I’m now in my mid 70’s and am a widower. I was in a club that was new to me and saw a dancer I’d had a 6 month fling with when my ATF had been away. She got my contact info and I hers. Within a few days she sent me a video of herself in the bathtub with a note asking if I still liked chasing girls like her.
She’s got a couple of kids, is no longer comfortable dancing, but is still a damned good looking woman. I’ve had sex with her 4 or 5 times recently but she’s 47 years younger than I, smokes weed a lot ( which is legal for us), has another “customer” who she’s known for 4 or 5 years, and has spoken of customers (plural). Now my ATF was an extras girl with a capital E on extra. One time I told her it was the best blowjob I ever had and she said, “Oh, everybody says that.”
So with a new and younger dancer I don’t expect exclusivity, but I’d like to have some idea of how much she’s spreading it around to better understand how much I should be spending and to have a better idea as to what her availability should be. Is this a fair area for me to explore? So far she came to my house once and I’ve been to her apartment 5 or 6 times, a couple of them to visit with her babies, the other times for pleasure.
We need to have a conversation about money. To this point it’s been sending her money on CashApp when she asks and about every $300 we get together. Very hit or miss and imprecise. At times I don’t want to get to a point where I’m spending every free cent on one girl, but other times it’s so much better than trying to line up a dancer for OTC. I really am struggling with this issue. And then while writing this my ATF texted me saying she’s about 75% sure that she’s moving back. Maybe I’ll just try celibacy.
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6 comments
Longer answer: Focus on what you want, not what she "needs." It's not your place or your job to help her pay her rent, or "save" her from having to fuck other guys. She's an adult (right?) and she's going to bang as many guys as she wants to for as much money as she can if that's how she wants to live her life.
If it comes up, tell her what you want to offer, amount, locations, length and frequency and she can either accept, reject or make a counter offer. Then go back to step 1: What do you want?
My philosophy is that I get to pay for and care about only the time we spend together. And that's all I can negotiate for in terms of the money I'm going to spend.
Regarding the "imprecise" and "hit-or-miss" stuff, if you want a sex worker who shows up on time, then find a decent escort. Dancers and many sugar babies are mostly unreliable. I correct for this by being pretty strict about being blown off. I have no problem with "firing" a provider. I've also found that if a girl really believes that the money will stop, then she magically becomes more reliable.
Your ATF... I don't know, man. I'm not going to say a lot because you've heard it before. Just don't. That relationship is poison. And I'm not ignoring the reality that you care about her. It's still poison.