Hello and Merry Christmas to my fellow TUSCL'ers. After several attempts I got the digits of a waitress at a club I frequent. Older, smokin body. Fun, funny,a bit "touchy/feely." Before she gave me her number she asked if I had anything going on with anyone in the club. Cut to the chase. Is a waitress a "civilian"in terms of OTC ? Or should I fully expect P4P ?
Is it ever not P4P? Have honestly ever met a women who wasn't interested in your money? Think about this. Are we gonna seriously kid ourselves into thinking some girl actually likes you? To me it just reads of something out of a science fiction novel and I refuse to believe any of it. Just save your self the time and have your check in hand the next time you see her.
The greater the disparity in age and looks, the less chance that it's a "civilian" context.
If she's a waitress in a strip club, then she's well aware that the customers are mostly motivated by sex, and that a lot of customers often regard the waitresses as a next-level prize. Meaning, she knows that guys don't go to strip clubs looking for girlfriends (mostly...).
I suspect that she knows you're looking for sex sooner rather than later, and that you're willing to offer gifts in exchange. But it wouldn't be a bad idea to talk more with her about expectations, just to be sure.
I’d treat this one as a civvie date initially. See where it goes and leave the ball in her court The mere fact she asked if you had “something going on” with a dancer hints to me it’s a civvie situation.
JB, would you have a reasonable chance with her if you met her in a bar? If not, then assume it's p4p and that she'll be looking for something eventually. After all, you didn't suddenly become younger and better looking just because you met her in a titty bar.
Strip clubs revolve around $$$; it's the only reason the women are there interacting with PLs and allowing themselves to be objectified (with rare exceptions) - unless you're a good-looking guy that civilian women normally take notice of, then in a SC you are a walking pile-of-ca$h and a mean$-to-an-end (aka a mark) - it's the nature of the beast
Hi again guys. Thanks to all of you for weighing in.I am 64 years old. Retired from the US Army. I run 10k road races and can still fit into my uniform. The waitress is 50 so the age/looks "disparity " gap isn't huge.
"... After several attempts I got the digits of a waitress at a club I frequent ..."
This makes me think she was not that interested to begin with (sure there's an outside shot this is not the case but I read it as in my former statement)
^ Very often the type of women we tend to like best need to convince themselves that they aren’t whores, so if it’s all about the cash their self esteem takes a hit, that why you still need to be a decent presentable type of guy, it’s more for them to convince themselves you really aren’t the issue.
"... she asked if I had anything going on with anyone in the club ..."
Strip club "relationships" are based around the PL's $$$ (with the obligatory "with rare exceptions").
I assume she assumes that if you're seeing a dancer that it is P4P (at least in some way) - I read her quote as her inquiring in her mind if you are the type to take care of girl$ OTC and if that is an angle she can pursue OTC (she already knows you pay $ for companionship you just do it ITC and she maybe wonders if you'll do it OTC) - her motivations "could be" legit but in strip club bizarro-world IMO it's kosher to not give the benefit of the doubt.
JohnBuford said "If this was/is only about the money, why hesitate?"
To make you hunt after her harder. Because she's not sure that she wants to see a guy OTC (dating or p4p). There could be many reasons.
If there was a 30-year age gap, I'd strongly recommend keeping a full wallet for your "dates". This isn't so cut and dry, at least not from the perspective of a bunch of guys you don't know on the internet.
So, yeah, you're going to have to talk with her more about expectations (yours and hers), and go from there.
But I'd say that the needle still leans toward P4P.
If she's 50 waitressing in a strip club then I assume she may be a former dancer as Dugan stated and with all her experience she knows the game super-well and can read and handle PLs well
The age difference is not that big so this def increases your chances of it being non-P4P - I'd say treat it as a normal date and given she's not an inexperienced young-girl she'll let you know what she has in mind sooner or later (whether directly or indirectly) - she may not ask for cash directly but if she starts bringing-up financial hardship$/emergencie$ then that should be your cue
JB, I'll ask the same question again: "Would you have a reasonable chance with her if you met her in a bar?"
The fact that you are fit is great, but that doesn't mean that your face doesn't look like road kill. If you think that you could pick her up in a normal setting, then treat it as a regular date. If you think she might be a bit out of your league, then play it by ear.
Oh, and all that extra information would have been nice the first time. We can't form a cogent opinion without all of the relevant facts on the ground soldier.
For a less sarcastic answer. I’ll echo what others said above let her bring it there. I have got ahead of myself where girls wanted to just go on a date, they didn’t want the whole sugar baby experience. I would ask to go on a regular ass date and progress from there.
I think it comes down to how you talk to her. I always talk to women in a completely civilian manner. It never goes out of that until she steers it that way.
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If she's a waitress in a strip club, then she's well aware that the customers are mostly motivated by sex, and that a lot of customers often regard the waitresses as a next-level prize. Meaning, she knows that guys don't go to strip clubs looking for girlfriends (mostly...).
I suspect that she knows you're looking for sex sooner rather than later, and that you're willing to offer gifts in exchange. But it wouldn't be a bad idea to talk more with her about expectations, just to be sure.
I had a waitress several years ago. Found out why she was willing to fuck in my living room floor. She was married!
This should be a TUSCL tagline!
Too many delusional fucks running around on TUSCL and strip clubs that can't get kaid in a morgue but all of a sudd
😄
Would you care to share your age/a pprox-age
This makes me think she was not that interested to begin with (sure there's an outside shot this is not the case but I read it as in my former statement)
Strip club "relationships" are based around the PL's $$$ (with the obligatory "with rare exceptions").
I assume she assumes that if you're seeing a dancer that it is P4P (at least in some way) - I read her quote as her inquiring in her mind if you are the type to take care of girl$ OTC and if that is an angle she can pursue OTC (she already knows you pay $ for companionship you just do it ITC and she maybe wonders if you'll do it OTC) - her motivations "could be" legit but in strip club bizarro-world IMO it's kosher to not give the benefit of the doubt.
To make you hunt after her harder. Because she's not sure that she wants to see a guy OTC (dating or p4p). There could be many reasons.
If there was a 30-year age gap, I'd strongly recommend keeping a full wallet for your "dates". This isn't so cut and dry, at least not from the perspective of a bunch of guys you don't know on the internet.
So, yeah, you're going to have to talk with her more about expectations (yours and hers), and go from there.
But I'd say that the needle still leans toward P4P.
The fact that you are fit is great, but that doesn't mean that your face doesn't look like road kill. If you think that you could pick her up in a normal setting, then treat it as a regular date. If you think she might be a bit out of your league, then play it by ear.
Oh, and all that extra information would have been nice the first time. We can't form a cogent opinion without all of the relevant facts on the ground soldier.
😄
SJG