The Joy of Getting Hard
reverendhornibastard
Depraved Deacon of Degeneracy
Every day I spend some quality “me time” getting hard in my man cave. It’s a habit I have maintained since I was in my teens.
So far, my daily pleasure of getting hard has paid handsome dividends in my health, my appearance, my self confidence and my sex life. Getting hard on a daily basis also seems to discourage assholes on the street from trying to fuck with me.
My kids often sit around watching their daddy getting hard. Ever since the kids came into our lives Mrs. Hornibastard is too busy to sit and watch her husband getting hard anymore but when she did, she often interrupted my workout because she wanted to enjoy the benefits of my manly hardness.
Being the gentleman that I am, I indulged her and left her damp, crumpled and leaking fluids on one of my exercise benches as I resumed my workout.
https://www.tuscl.net/photo.php?id=1841
We will never know for sure but, just based on the timing, I suspect our twins may be the product of one of these sweaty gym canoodlings.
I’m very fortunate to have a good set of gym equipment so I can get hard in the privacy of my own home.
Approximately half of my sizable, upstairs man cave is devoted to fitness equipment.
https://www.tuscl.net/photo.php?id=1840
Sure, a high dollar gym would provide a wider variety of quality fitness equipment than I have upstairs, but I prefer the convenience of working out at home.
I especially like the freedom of being able to fart loudly while lifting heavy weights without concerning myself over possibly offending some shit-headed HMW who might have been within olfactory range at the time.
My periodic colonic blasts are an effective means of clearing out any members of my family in the viewing gallery, restoring my solitude and the sanctity of my man cave.
So far, my daily pleasure of getting hard has paid handsome dividends in my health, my appearance, my self confidence and my sex life. Getting hard on a daily basis also seems to discourage assholes on the street from trying to fuck with me.
My kids often sit around watching their daddy getting hard. Ever since the kids came into our lives Mrs. Hornibastard is too busy to sit and watch her husband getting hard anymore but when she did, she often interrupted my workout because she wanted to enjoy the benefits of my manly hardness.
Being the gentleman that I am, I indulged her and left her damp, crumpled and leaking fluids on one of my exercise benches as I resumed my workout.
https://www.tuscl.net/photo.php?id=1841
We will never know for sure but, just based on the timing, I suspect our twins may be the product of one of these sweaty gym canoodlings.
I’m very fortunate to have a good set of gym equipment so I can get hard in the privacy of my own home.
Approximately half of my sizable, upstairs man cave is devoted to fitness equipment.
https://www.tuscl.net/photo.php?id=1840
Sure, a high dollar gym would provide a wider variety of quality fitness equipment than I have upstairs, but I prefer the convenience of working out at home.
I especially like the freedom of being able to fart loudly while lifting heavy weights without concerning myself over possibly offending some shit-headed HMW who might have been within olfactory range at the time.
My periodic colonic blasts are an effective means of clearing out any members of my family in the viewing gallery, restoring my solitude and the sanctity of my man cave.
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24 comments
I would love to bike 20 miles a day.
Hell, I’d settle for 10 miles a day but my ass can’t take it. No matter what kind of goofy looking cushioned bicycle seat I put on my bike, my butt hurts so much after 20 minutes that I just give it up.
Even when I was young I couldn’t tolerate bicycle seats for very long.
I do crossfit now, which gets some degree of hipster scorn in the fitness world. But it really works for me. The results have been fantastic.
My attitude about fitness isn't far removed from my attitude about strip clubbing... Do what works for you. Don't get hurt or hurt others. Don't tell people that they're having fun wrong.
1. How many days a week do you lift?
2. Do you take days off between workouts?
3. What is the optimal number of days one should take off between arm workouts?
4. Do you train biceps and triceps on same day or alternate?
1. I lift every other day.
2. I do aerobics daily.
3. I don’t know what is the optimal interval between arm workouts. I just take one day off between weights of any kind.
4. Biceps and triceps are always worked the same day.
But bear in mind that my workouts are intended for maintenance, not for bulking up. The only time I increase the weights I lift is when I’ve been unable to work out for a while (example - I had a hernia repair last year). When I first go back to lifting I reduce the weights to avoid injury. Then I gradually increase the weights until I get back to the levels I think are appropriate for me.
It’s important to remember where you are in life. I don’t progress to weights as heavy now as I did when I was in my 30s and 40s. The incremental health benefits of such heavy lifting at my age are not worth the associated risks.
You can get away with more and recover more quickly from injury when you are young than you can when you’re old.
Hell, when I first started lifting in my late teens I was so aggressive in my workouts I gave myself stretch marks on my biceps and shoulders!
If I did that know I might end up in the hospital!
P.S. Have you tried riding with a seat attached to the top of the bicycle seat post?
My butt has always been so hard to please when it comes to bicycle riding I might need to attach a Lazy-Boy recliner to the bicycle seat post.
Even when I rode a Harley I paid a lot extra for an adjustable seat.
I went to a doctor once to try and figure out why my ass was so sensitive. The doctor just said I was a pansy ass.
I also like having access to multiple workout equipment - I'm an LA Fitness member and there are def a good # of hot chicas in the Miami-area LA Fitness' I hit which makebl the workouts more enjoyable.
It takes much effort to not get hard under those curcumstances.
You can substitute just nothing, or short dresses, for yoga pants. But there is nothing you can substitute for high heels.
The basic ideas are coming from the ancient pagan temples, by far predating the United States.
SJG
Please tell baby Jesus not to worry. I’m not battling faggotry. I’m just battling wisdom and devotion to family.
For most of my life I would have viciously and repeatedly boned that young lady in Indonesia. But I’ve trashed enough relationships and marriages already (you know ... “been there, done that” sort of attitude). Plus now, for the first time in my wretched life (as far as I know), I have children of my own.
I’ve been trying very hard not to fuck up any more.
Hence all my mongering. It’s a much safer and cheaper way to philander without getting into serious trouble.
SJG
https://www.today.com/video/today/560574…
No heels? No paycheck! Temp worker sent home for wearing flats to office
https://www.today.com/style/no-heels-no-…
Study: High heels have power over men
https://www.today.com/video/today/565825…
sjg