Sex on the Beach: Don’t Bother!
reverendhornibastard
Depraved Deacon of Degeneracy
Seaside sex is often depicted in films and in travel brochures as if it were your wet dream come true.
You might spend a lot of time and effort scoping out the perfect romantic spot, an isolated beach cove with crystal blue waters, limestone cliffs and palm trees swaying in a gentle breeze. You can bring some fine wine, assorted cheeses and grapes and a large blanket to lie on.
Don’t bother!
I’ve tried.
No matter how carefully you planned, sex on the beach will never live up to your expectations.
The damned sand gets into EVERYTHING!
Comments
last commentRite
Sex on the beach = sand in the coochie
....and therefore, pain of the penis!😟
I haven’t done it yet I still gotta try it
Muddy9,
Still gotta try it?
Good luck!
You might want to invest in a large tube of Neosporin. You’re going to need it.
Brilliant post reverendhornibastard!
My only attempt at sex on the beach was a miserable fail, yes, the sand gets every where and it hurts.
The beach is a great place to hang out, enjoy the view, and get get in mood but not a good place for the actual deed.
Totally disagree. I banged my CF in the VIP at the Hot Beaches strip club in Newport, and we didn't get sand anywhere
I've had really good beach experiences. Bring a towel, let her ride you, sit on some rocks and have her on top...
Never done it,and ive heard the cons, but my ideal situation is setting up a tent and going at it in the middle of the night.
More than once, I lived blocks from the beach as a teen. The go to spot for us horny teens was under the boardwalk. There are ways to keep the sand to a minimum. However, have had some encounters that had to stop because the sand became too much. Wouldn’t do it as an adult when I can now rent a hotel or own a home to use the bedroom. But it was definitely a great place to sneak off during adolescent years.
I've always wanted to do it but was never able to pull it off. Was going to try it on my honeymoon, but we could not find a secluded enough spot to try.
Had a dancer tell me it's not all that it's cracked up to be.