tuscl

When to lead and when to follow?

chandler
Blue Ridge Foothills
During the lapdance, when do you let the girl lead things, and when and how do you take the lead?

12 comments

  • Book Guy
    18 years ago
    It's a tough call. I have had good experiences from girls who take instruction well (and I REALLY find it despicable when a girl ignores or disdains instruction; that's an instant reject-o-move). But when I have to give too much instruction it ruins the mood of, "she is going to take CARE of me" coupled with "she WANTS to take CARE of me" (a fantasy, yes, but a wonderful one).
  • casualguy
    18 years ago
    I'm paying a girl to dance for me. Therefore I think she should be able to do some decent dancing without me telling her what she should do. If she asks what I like, I'll tell her. Often times though, she can tell what I like and don't like if she's any good. If I'm doing a lot of talking while a girl is dancing for me, either I'm drunk or not into it.
  • Yoda
    18 years ago
    I agree Chandler, that's exactly what it feels like with the right girl and the right situation. My question would be this: Does this feeling ever happen with the very first dance you get from a particular lady or does it take a few visits to develop? I've found it can work either way.
  • chandler
    18 years ago
    Yoda: I should have thought through my question better before posting it. I was thinking about how lap dancing is different from sex in that the girl is so much in charge. With a bad dance, you're always aware of that. With a really great dance, it seems more like you're both taking the initiative. You're reading each other's signals and responding at the same time. So much so that you don't even think about who's leading who, even though ultimately she is.
  • chitownlawyer
    18 years ago
    I agree with Yoda.
  • chandler
    18 years ago
    I don't think it's leading her if she doesn't follow, which telling her what to do would mean. I'm not asking about bossing anybody around like some dictator. That sounds boring whether it's me or her doing it. If a dance is really "interactive", as they say, it seems to me there needs to be some degree of inititiave taken by both parties. That's what I'm asking about.
  • casualguy
    18 years ago
    I didn't think of giving suggestions or talking to her as leading her.
  • casualguy
    18 years ago
    I pretty much thought telling her what to do was leading her.
  • chandler
    18 years ago
    Casualguy & Yoda: Do you never touch the dancer without receiving direction from her? How about telling her when you like what she's doing or making suggestions?
  • Yoda
    18 years ago
    I never take the lead. I don't coach dancers. They are either turning me on or they aren't. If they aren't I find another dancer.
  • casualguy
    18 years ago
    I usually let the dancer do her thing unless I may have been drinking a little bit too much.
  • Yoda
    18 years ago
    Chandler: If I'm in a contact state I don't wait for her permission to touch her. I do not touch boobs or pussy unless I am invited. If I'm in MA, where there is a lot of grey area, I wait until she places my hands where she feels comfortable-this can vary on every visit depending on how busy the PD area is and who is watching.

    I definitely tell the lady if I am enjoying what she is doing but I don't really offer suggestions. I'd really rather see what she has in mind and, as I said previously, if I don't like it I just stop buying dances from her.
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