Things that make a strip club crappy
rogertex
Texas
Saturday, March 9, 2019 12:16 PM
I wanna create a Crappiness Score for Strip Clubs.
Throw in here stuff you don't like in a strip cub.
I'll start
1. Club has minimum drink requirement
2. Greater than 50% of bartenders are males
3. You see bouncer/manager strutting around the floor "more often" than a dancer
4. Songs run less than 3 minutes
5. Bathroom troll always has stories to tell you
6. Bathroom troll hinting availability of drugs
7. Rotating strobe lights on stage aim at your seat every 5 minutes
8.
9.
Throw in here stuff you don't like in a strip cub.
I'll start
1. Club has minimum drink requirement
2. Greater than 50% of bartenders are males
3. You see bouncer/manager strutting around the floor "more often" than a dancer
4. Songs run less than 3 minutes
5. Bathroom troll always has stories to tell you
6. Bathroom troll hinting availability of drugs
7. Rotating strobe lights on stage aim at your seat every 5 minutes
8.
9.
Got something to say?
Start your own discussion
52 comments
8. Club requires Drivers License scan
10. Club prices lady drinks at about 2x regular drinks
11. Besides entry - more extra charges depending on where you sit
Assume dancers are decent (A-team, B-team, etc).
What petty annoyances - when they start adding up - can make you delete a club off your list.
Cell phones on the floor
Overly aggressive cocktail waitresses
Nosy bouncers - I get it this isn’t an extras club you don’t have to peek on us every two minutes
Clubs with low hiring standards - why is joe dirts hulkish cousin working here?
Glitter
Too many thugs
No napkins in the VIP
"No napkins in the VIP"
+1
MALE bartender
Dirty bathroom
Dancers younger than 21; i like having drinks with dancers
Room troll (aka bouncer at the door)
Male patting me down; I generally pay the bouncer $5 to allow me to pay a dancer $10 to pay me down.
Weak drinks.
No touch rules.
GPS Dancers.
Tweakers
Watered down drinks
Fights
One thing I'm starting to like thanks to TUSCL is watching old men at clubs, great people watching...
Others have made good calls as well.
Bracelets
No touch rules
I also don’t like:
1) Dancers who are obnoxious on purpose. Like some of them just act out their nasty habits on full display and don’t even try to show class. Some guys don’t care, but I prefer women who act like they have some maturity.
2) Dancers who dance when they’re not on stage or giving a lap dance. You know who they are? They are always flailing their arms and swinging their hips in the middle of the club trying to be the center of attention because no one actually wants to get a dance from them.
3) Waitresses who never wait on anyone. I’ve seen full houses where waitresses just stand in a corner looking stupid or circle the entire club looking at tables of low or empty glasses and bottles.
4) Uncleanliness. Seen tables with spillage or crumbs on them never getting cleaned off all night. Maybe the waitresses could do THAT while they’re busy not serving customers.
5) Customers who act like they own the club. Loud, disgusting, too mobile, always in my line of sight because they can’t be still for 5 seconds and have to show the entire club they are really important and entertaining.
Those makeout sessions are how you get a girl softened up and opened up. So with that, everything will work out.
So the rest of the posted complaints are irrelevant.
SJG
Stones, Gimme Shelter, Atlantic City 1989, early Lisa Fischer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jARNrKiW…
Wicked Lady
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtRccgPd…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDg9ljov…
Dance bracelets are stupid, just raise the cover. No dancer is going to approach the guy without a bracelet.
Allowing smoking without adequate ventilation.
A personal pet peeve is smoke machines coming up from the stage floor. Obscuring the dancers is supposed to enhance the experience?
Getting one dollar bills at a strip club should be quick and easy. Don't make me stand at a bar for 5 - 10 minutes. Don't give me $2 bills. I am not interested in buying your "club bucks".
SJG
I wanna relax and not be having to tip a girl every 2-minutes even if I don't like her - you have ro either tip, or be having to shake your head no all night long and have them give you a dirty-look or insult you for not tipping them - it's especially bad in busy clubs with a tip-parade - in some Miami clubs you can have 4 or 5 girls approaching you for a tip in the course of one song bc many of the dancers milk the tip-parade and circulate the club all night long asking for tips (instead of just when they get off stage) - with so many inexperienced SCers that can't say no and not tip it means you not tipping is the "asshole" - and it seems the more you can't say no and tip the more you get hit-up - after an hour or so of you saying no eventually most of them just bypass you and don't come asking.
My list is
*Past thier prime shot girls. They look at least 50 and want you to tip them
*Clingers, especially the girls who cling extra hard when they notice you have an eye on another girl. I recently had a dancer eye fuck and pout in my direction while I was receiving an intense bar grind. It was kind of hot knowing she was jealous
*Drink minimum when most customers are only there for extras
*Clubs where dancers prefer to post enticing instagram videos to get people to visit instead of actually interacting with people in the bar.
Extreme drink hustle
Too much time between dancers on the stage
Not enough dancers
ID scan is a dealbreaker for me also. Only been denied entry once when ID scan demanded by door guy. A few times, slipping guy a $5 to look at ID but not scan it has worked.
Was at a club this week getting some high friction dances from a new girl, and at dance #8 I was about to pop and wasn’t covered (I don’t like LDK in pants), and told her slow down a bit or I’m gonna pop. She then exclaimed “Baseball!,” “Double play!” and other sports terms - that cracked me up and so I played along and exclaimed a few sports terms of my own, and she said ya I used to do that to my boyfriend when we were fucking and I wanted him to continue riding me cuz I wasn’t done yet. Then she said I don’t mind if you cum it’s what you’re here for anyway so enjoy yourself.
The drink hustle has only happened to me at Follies, although it hasn't been a problem the last few times I've gone.
The one thing I'll mention that I don't think anyone said is lack of seating at places other than the stage and/or bar. Black clubs tend to be most guilty of this...looking at you, Mint and Trap...but smaller mixed clubs have that problem too.
Everything else is specific to employees, as opposed to being club issues.
I want a club with whores who don’t care to pretend they are anything more...
SJG doesn't visit SCs or TJ, no worries about his presence making it crappy.
I'm not sure about IC but it sounds like he might visit SCs occasionally... Lol