For those of us who are married . . .

avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
Still don't know what I'm doing here . . .
Do you talk about your relationship with strippers?

When I first started clubbing I always pretended to be single, but soon learned how unnecessary it is. Since then I've had a number of girls tell me that their biggest pet peeve is customers who complain about their wives and say things like "I wish I could have a girl like you instead". When a girl complains about those types of customers I generally take it as an opportunity to share that I'm in a great relationship. Most girls seem to respect this, though I can tell that I've taken it too far with some. For example, sharing pictures seems to rub some (but not all) the wrong way (which I can understand, because it rubs me the wrong way if I have to look at pictures of the stripper's boyfriend).

For those of you who are married, how much of your marriage do you discuss at the club? Is it good things or bad things? And what do you consider sharing too much?

36 comments

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avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
6 years ago
Not married. And no, nobody (but a FEW school classmates) know of my interest in strip clubs.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
Not married either.

Seems to me some dancers prefer married guys since those guys are usually not looking to make a GF out of the stripper or fall in-love with her.

There there seem to be some dancers that seem to resent a married guy cheating on his wife (these are probably in the minority and probably young/inexperienced idealistic dancers).

I would "think" for the most-part most dancers are willing to talk about what most custies wanna talk about as long as it doesn't get too personal about the dancer.
avatar for Warrior15
Warrior15
6 years ago
I don't wear a wedding band. If they ask, I will give them an honest answer and tell them I am married. Other than that, I don't talk about it. But I do agree with part of what you said. I think it is a very bad idea to complain about your spouse to the girls. Plus, the last thing I want to do is hear about their relationship problems.
avatar for RandomMember
RandomMember
6 years ago
Dancer trying for the romance hustle might want to know if you're single; conversely married guys are less clingy and needy for an arrangement. I usually mention that I'm married and drop it.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
6 years ago
I don’t bring it up, but if somebody notices my wedding ring and asks, I won’t lie about it. I’m pretty open about information that doesn’t identify her, though.
avatar for future POTUS and Senator in training
Lolol at u dumb fucks who think ur cheating is justified
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
6 years ago
I’m not married. One CF told me she thought I was married. I brought her to my house for OTC so she could see no woman was living there.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
6 years ago
@Nicole,

You probably won’t understand this, but I’m not cheating.
avatar for April9424
April9424
6 years ago
why would they be upset by pics of your wife? were these regular girls you saw a lot or just random strippers? that makes no sense to me. i agree w/randommember that it's usually preferable. the only time i have ever been upset by a wife pic was a guy who showed me a his wife who had passed and she looked a lot like me, that was sad and weird.

i don't see the problem with complaining about your marriage problems either if you're paying for her time. acting as a therapist is part of the job, in my opinion. no one stays in back rooms for multiple hours just to bust a nut. if a girl is at all bothered by a customer having a wife she shouldn't be a stripper
avatar for Warrior15
Warrior15
6 years ago
^^^ That right there is why I like for dancers to be part of the discussion board. I think it's great to get their point of view on things.
avatar for April9424
April9424
6 years ago
thank you warrior :)

i like when guys talk to me about their lives. i think being able to connect with people and make them feel listened to is important, but without getting invested to the point where you're butthurt that the guy is going home to his wife at the end of the day. for every guy who's goal is to LDK with minimal small talk, there's another guy who wants to take a load off emotionally. gotta get you a stripper who can do both :p
avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
6 years ago
"why would they be upset by pics of your wife?"

My CF tells me she feels bad about all the OTC we do now that she can attach a face to the woman I'm married to. I think others just felt inferior because of how attractive my wife is.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
6 years ago
I don't hide it. Most of these girls have SOs themselves, including the ones who say otherwise.

With that said, I never share problems or other intimate details. First because that is my business alone, but also because these girls here sad tales from pussies all the time and I don't want to join their ranks. I think that most of the girls actually appreciate not getting some sob story or other excuse for why I do this anyway. I do this because I want to and because I can, period, and I'm not shy about it.

Oh, and this whole guilt notion has never really resonated with me. Guys with means and opportunity have been chasing side tail since the beginning of time. It is only in this modern era of hyper-sensitive males that men have been gettinng all twisted up over it. My dick - along with the rest of me - ends up home every night. Those same over sensitive pussies are also the ones most likely to fall in love with a piece of side ass and break up their homes.

Anyway, just my two cents fwiw.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
I don't hide the fact I'm married. I wear my ring. Plus I'm such a good catch that they wouldn't believe I would still be available anyway.

It all depends on my comfort level with the stripper as to what I will discuss.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
I never speak badly of my wife or bring any family drama or sob stories into the club, regardless who I am talking to. Thats pretty much the case outside the club too with only a couple exceptions.
avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
6 years ago
"Guys with means and opportunity have been chasing side tail since the beginning of time. It is only in this modern era of hyper-sensitive males that men have been gettinng all twisted up over it."

I don't have an issue chasing side tail, obviously, but my question was more or less aimed at what should be discussed in front of said side tail rather than getting all bent out of shape over the fact that I'm chasing side tail. I assume you're going to tell me that you discuss only what you feel like discussing, and should it be something she didn't care to hear, it's okay because she's only side tail. Is that accurate?
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
Are you asking me?
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
6 years ago
Oh, rick
avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
6 years ago
rick . . . but your input is always welcome
avatar for joc13
joc13
6 years ago
I'm married.

whether I talk about my wife depends on if I have my GF with me in the club ;-)
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
I think Chris Rock said it best, Most men are only as faithful as their opportunities.
That said I don't think most men that are married, or otherwise paired up think of sex the same way women think of it.
Let's be real about it, I don't think there are many guys that would turn down a blow job if the opportunity presented itself, and I don't think many married guys would be willing to abandon their spouses and family for some female, just because they got a little extra-curricular activity, truth be told, guys leaving a SO for
a whore were probably on their way out long before the whore showed up.
avatar for WILLYSGOTAWOMAN
WILLYSGOTAWOMAN
6 years ago
I don't share any details o fmy life with with strippers
avatar for ei8ht_Ball
ei8ht_Ball
6 years ago
"guys leaving a SO for a whore were probably on their way out long before the whore showed up.'

You should hear about the poor fool my CF keeps talking about (being taken advantage of by a different girl, of course, not by my CF).

I greatly respect and appreciate my CF's honesty and her lack of interest in pretending that what we do is more than it is . . . but at other times, she doesn't really need to be THAT honest about it, does she? I'd believe her if she pretended to go through the rest of her life emotionally scarred because I'm already spoken for, but I can see why she doesn't because i'm not going to pay extra for the ego boost. Oh well.
avatar for TrapBaby304
TrapBaby304
6 years ago
If a wife takes her man for granted and is too stupid to hold on to him, its on her.
avatar for TrollWarnBot
TrollWarnBot
6 years ago
WARNING - The following accounts are considered to be forum trolls and may not be trustworthy:

TrapBaby304 - definite troll account

Nicole1994 - real person but posts troll content
avatar for anthony6613
anthony6613
6 years ago
I tell them if it comes up. I agree with rickdugan.
avatar for April9424
April9424
6 years ago
"My CF tells me she feels bad about all the OTC we do now that she can attach a face to the woman I'm married to. I think others just felt inferior because of how attractive my wife is."

ok that's why i was wondering if they were regular girls of yours, and esp with OTC i can kinda understand. and especially if your wife is hot. i still think they shouldn't engage in that shit if they get into their feelings that easily, but it does make sense.
avatar for DroidX
DroidX
6 years ago
I won't volunteer anything, but I will tell the truth if asked. One girl today told me that she prefers married men because we aren't clingy and aren't looking for a gf. Most that I've known see married men as less of a threat.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
I’ve heard of dancers justifying their ROB behavior before because a customer is married. But there’s a lot of rationalizations one could make if one wanted to go that route. Including despising the entire patriarchy.

I’ve done the ROB thing before a long time ago, and used the exact same “married man scum bag” excuse to tell myself that was okay. But that didn’t sit well with me, so I stopped.

I like to think of myself as a person who doesn’t truly give a shit about anything, whether it’s customers or other dancers. I’m definitely better about being consistent with that now versus a couple of years ago.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
^Oh yeah, but not hiding it, but also not going out of your way to bring it up is probably the best bet.
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
6 years ago
seems that i should tell a stripper that i’m married even when i’m divorced.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
6 years ago
I'm married. In every conversation with a dancer that involves my wife, her name comes up. Last week's experience, which I posted involved ski chat so I must have showed my dancer buddy 25 skiing pics of wife. In the two clubs I frequent everyone knows I am married and some have met my wife. When I talk about her and how I feel about her it makes me different to the dancers than other PL's who bad mouth their wife, claim she sucks in bed or they are shut off and they are just staying for the kids. Women don't like men who bad mouth other women.
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
6 years ago
I wear my wedding ring but like others have said, I don't mention it unless the dancer asks or comments. I did have one ask me just as I was about to slide my hand inside her thong.."so how long have you been cheating on your wife." Believe it or not, she was a one and done.
avatar for jsully63
jsully63
6 years ago
@nicole my wife often comes to a club with me. If I go on my own I usually let her know. Am I still cheating?
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
Truth be told it seems to me that younger group both male and female, not all but many, are much more judgmental and closed minded, Nicole you should take notice. Trap you really have a lot of growing up to do, you may be good looking, but your personality is major ugly.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
6 years ago
Funny, I thought about this thread briefly later last night when I asked the manager on duty to do a quick scan of the parking lot for my new friend's SO. Apparently she lives almost across the street from the club and sometimes he likes to pop over, which could have problematic if he did so while I was loading her into my car. ☺

As I said before, most of these girls also have SOs. IME it can actually be beneficial if she knows that you do to as it confirms that you're both in the same boat and you're not going to judge her for it.
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