Sex addiction

I’ve never been to one of those groups. I’m probably in a sex addiction as well - but I’ve stopped seeing a therapist. I see my psychiatrist every few months, but that’s all.

It’s probably a good idea. If you think you can open up and deal with the 12 step process. If it doesn’t work - you don’t need to continue going.

However, i was thinking about your comments and remembering the film Fight Club - as Edward Norton hooked up with a girl he met at addiction groups.

gawker... how much is this guy costing YOU? if it is out of YOUR pocket... heck. you know what to do. cut your PLM expense. buena suerte.

and cut the doc.

That's why God invented health insurance. My co-pay is zero.

The larger question is, Do I want to quit? Knowing you should is not the same as having a desire to quit. I did a VIP last night with a beautiful young stripper, but with a knowledge going in that there'd be no extras. We laughed, she danced and grinder on my dick, I played with her tots and ass, and asked her point blank if she minded being groped by dirty old men. She said no; she actually enjoyed the attention and the compliments, but hated the stigma: no good guy wants to be the BF of a stripper, cuz they all think she's sucking dick every night. I appreciated her frankness and we talked about her goals and options. I enjoyed myself, but later reverted the $300 it cost. But, as she said when I requested a BlowJob, "maybe next time."

Sex addiction? You should take up shuffleboard and hanging out at Mcdonalds every saturday am to drink coffee to talk about the good old days

I just took a quiz, says I'm normal....though admittedly Jan and Feb of this year, not normal....way overboard on SC spending...a bunch because I found an atf that really clicked with me and having extra funds due to bitcoin profits...Now I'm cutting back....not sure how atf will feel..if she doesn't like it I'm going to move to her friend that keeps trying to steal me from her...maybe she'll be quicker to otc.

upright... these ARE the good old days...

This was discussed back in 2009.

https://tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=1094…

I'm not a sex addict per se, but I'm pretty sure I'm a strip club + OTC addict. For years I hit strip clubs at least twice a week; this year I've had 7 OTC dates with 4 different strippers. As a matter of fact, the week before last I had one stripper spend the night (9pm to 9am) with me in my hotel room. Then I shooed her off at 9, slept another hour (because we didn't actually sleep that much), cleaned up, met the other at 11am for lunch, and by noon we were 69ing in that same hotel room.

"Hi, my name is Deuce and I'm addicted to strip clubs and OTC dates with strippers."

I'm going to guess most of us who visit clubs regularly have a stronger-than-average libido and are more interested in sex than the average person. And yes, given the money we spend on it, it's probably into addiction-type territory.

I look at it a different way: It's one of the few things we're hard-wired to do, along with eating, sleeping, using the bathroom and protecting ourselves (roof over our head, clothing, etc.). You say I'm addicted; I say I'm just more in touch with what's important in life and makes me feel good. I think it's the people that aren't addicted to sex, that come up with whatever excuse they can think of to avoid it from religion to monogamy to whatever, that are missing out. Take that, Doc.

(Of course, if you're spending beyond your means such that you can't do the other hard-wired things, yes, you have a problem. But if you've got those other things set ... eh, I think you're good.)

Gawker;
Sex is not a disease, sexuality is a healthy, integral and important part of people's lives. Treating sex as dangerous, unhealthy and destructive stigmatizes many people. The label of sex addiction gives false excuses for the selfish, narcissistic and destructive acts that some, leaders and celebrities engage in, and distracts from the real issues involved in their choices.
Like most TUSCL members have acknowledge; they will consider the time and money spent on a DS and an ATF as a good deal.
The best portion of your life will be the time you spend with someone who matters to you.

"This was discussed back in 2009."

2009? That was nine years ago, you old fool! Go take a nap.

I'm a member of Sexaholics Unanimous .

mark94 posted a comment about being mindful of triggers in my thread in response to my issues. Thinking about that helped me with my issues and working through them. When watching smokers try to quit, the one thing that I noticed that caused people to fail and relapse almost 100% was not having an alternative for stress management during acute stress.

So, after everything, now Gawker are considering rehab for HIMSELF? That would make us all enablers if we didn't put him on ignore.

gammanu95's comment = brilliant!

That said, I can't put gawker on ignore. He is the #1 source of crazy stories on TUSCL. You could sell stat stuff as a novel!

Anonamous Jim may have hit the nail on the head - when my "hobby" becomes ( or became) an obsession and begins to max out my credit cards and make me think about selling my house and yet I send a text to my ATF asking if she's interested in a 4 day Carribean vacation, maybe I've got my priorities fucked up.
My shrink has no gripe with healthy sex or even some not so healthy fucking around, but when it interferes with other things one should be doing.... it's just a piece of me doesn't want to be told what I SHOULD do. I dated a 41 year old civilian last weekend. We hadn't seen each other in 24 years and texted a lot beforehand. She even snuck in a text that she has Herpes which told me that she was ripe for the picking.
Now in a strip club she'd be a 5 or 6. Her face could pass for 30 easily. But I'm spoiled when I've been banging a 9+ for 8 or 9 years, even if it's been crazy shit. I don't know

The main question is just what gawker mentioned. Does he want to quit? I’ve tried the idea of cold turkey - and it’s never worked for me.

I tried to stop external sources - cut off accessing web sites - and otc - and it just doesn’t work over a few months.

In my view, I haven’t found the desire to stop. I’m not sure if I will either.

Gawker, if you want to continue, I’m not sure if you are ready yet. You might be thinking that logically it’s a good thing to deal with it. But if you aren’t fully ready to stop - maybe it’s not time?

I agree with CJKent and AnonymousJim.

I am addicted to sex. I’m also addicted to breathing, food, water and shelter. They’re all requirements for a long, healthy life.

I do think it’s an addiction, but the root is prolly escape, so you can only fix it by confronting your real life, and making changes. It’s mindless consumption. As long as you are banging a hot girl, your brain is able to believe, “what troubles? We rock at life!! Winning!!” After, you are back to reality, those happy feelings are gone, and you have two choices, deal w life, or find a way to not think ab it. The more you escape, the deeper the hole, and the harder it is to deal w your real life, so the escape is craved even more.

Any good therapist would first try to discern between avoidance behavior and addiction. As far as addiction goes it my be the danger and not the sex. At best what you are doing is probably a positive neurosis and would be hard to stop. If it is causing you , or those who you love, pain and anxiety then it may have spilled over to addiction. I doubt that you are :just" addicted to sex as sex can stand for so many other issues as a sublimated or compensating experience.If you can afford it and you are not hurting anyone why worry about it? I don't analyze myself ,I just go the club and have fun.

Sex is a need as others have posted, not satisfying-it is constantly trying to ignore the elephant in the room, you can only do it for so long.

IMO a guy not having his sexual needs met will probably be in a worse spot emotionally and probably physically.

It seems you may be overdoing it for some reason and perhaps due to what you're going-thru you're perhaps self-medicating as a way to deal with your current-circumstances.

As outlined, not being able to control your urges is where a problem may lie. If you're selling your house for your ATF to go on a trip, then yeah, I'd keep seeing the professional help. I love my place. Would never sell for a woman I'm paying for, ahem, services.

Of course I love clubbing. But I'm also involved with a new business and spending money on startup costs right now. More Internet videos and fewer club trips for me right now. Every once in a while, I do need a fix. But I feel like I can keep it under control. As long as I can do that, I don't feel too bad.

Fire your therapist! What is the goal of a sex addiction 12 step program? To defeat 5 million years of evolution and convince you that sex is not a biological need? Next thing you know, your therapist will be recommending that you enroll in a food addiction group, water addiction group and oxygen addiction group.

Sorry about the situation with your wife but that does not mean that you should refrain from fulfilling your basic human needs.

That's what I think, too Gawker. Maybe just avoid the risky behaviours, like having heroin addicted strippers in your house and lighting your bed on fire. A step or two below that. ;)

What is a man, if you take away all of his vices? I would never advocate that!

"... What is the goal of a sex addiction 12 step program? To defeat 5 million years of evolution ..."

LOL

It's probably not "having-sex vs not-having-sex" - probably has to do w/ how one goes about having sex and having their needs met.

The ease w/ which many P4Pers can get sex can lead to things getting thrown off kilter where the P4Ping can become a priority over other important things in life - and it seems often times the more one does it the less effect it has and one thinks they need to increase it where it may actually be better to cut-back

As I've posted in the past, I think too-much SCing where it's, or feels, problematic, is often not the problem but the symptom of the/a problem; and one uses SCing as a way to deal with a root-problem (in the case where one feels like they are overdoing it).

In situations like this, cutting out the SCing usually doesn't accomplish much beyond saving a few-bucks but probably leave-one feeling kinda miserable since the original reason for the over-SCing is still there but now not at-least being medicated via SCing

Gawker, perhaps you answered this in another post but I'm curious whether the heroin addicted ATF or her boyfriend or other hangers on (if there were any) ever ripped shit off from your house and sold it for drug money.

Papi, as usual, makes a good point. Most of us who are really into this are essentially using clubbing to fulfill some other need. I know, for me, depression is a thing. I usually don't feel depressed in a club, though. Drinking would probably take over for clubbing if I couldn't club.