Have you ever stepped back and looked at what we've become?

That partly true. It’s not that we are necessarily creeped out tho, but guys will do certain things: their body language/ playing of their phone/ not tipping/ not drinking, that sends the signal that they don’t want to talk to anyone, but are there for some reason, so we will go ask if they want a dance. Often, these are the guys who immediately say “yes,” get their dances, and either leave, or go back to hide at their table. Or they will say, “no, I’m just here waiting for a phone call.” Either way, they don’t seem to want us to hang out w them.

BJ99- I totally get what you're saying.. Ive been told you never know who going to say yes! I always tell her to smile and make eye contact with everyone. That goes a long way. But many guys as I witnessed last night do look like creepers and could be intimidating for gals that are not so seasoned...

Why would you want to step back and look at what you've become?

Try to get in the same state of mind as the guy who was buttfucking a girl and didn't realize it. That guy is aces!

Some guys are genuinely creepy, but they usually do want to engage w us. Guys who wait outside for the club to open, ask us a lot of personal detailed questions, guys who are fixated on taking us to dinner, or getting our number “just to hang out, or be friends,” when we’ve just met. Guys who are physically rough in an angry way, or ask us stuff like, “isn’t his degrading to you?” as tho they assume all men are creepy, like them. Stuff like that.

I see quite a lot of Guys tend to be overly raucous and obnoxious. They tell the girls "i have money" and pull a stack of one out of their pocket and then back into the pocket it goes. "hey come hang out with us" only not to tip or even by drinks. It's like they believe thay before they walked through the door nobody was tipping and they have a monopoly on single bills so the girls need to bend over backwards for very little.

@OP - Why don't you think we can? There are plenty of us who are fairly well adjusted individuals and behave in a civilized manner in a strip club. I guess maybe the post wasn't directed at people like me, but the point is just because you see posts crying about not being approached don't assume its a problem for the majority of us here.

I generally see more of the behavior GACA is describing than what you're describing. Guys showing out for their buddies, trying to impress strippers with a stack of $200 in singles. Then of course they leave with $175 of them or throw them 10 at a time at as many girls as they can, so they can share in the attention she's getting on stage. Or being visibly obnoxious, trying to grab em by the pussy or jam their finger up their ass at the bar, trying to stare up their assholes on stage for a $1 tip. I have no illusions about why I'm there, but I sometimes have to fight the urge to knock some of those dudes the fuck out, so I kinda get what you're saying.

Generally, I go in with a smile on my face, am friendly and cheery with most of the strippers, waitresses, bartenders, and even occasionally managers. I do occasionally play with my phone & generally look non-approachable, but that's usually cause I don't want to be approached. Often because I'm in a shitty mood & am waiting to see a particular distraction, who has been warned of my condition in advance. I wish more girls would take BJ99's approach and leave me alone when I look like that, or at the very list keep it to a drive by "wanna dance" or "may I join you" instead of trying to force the issue.

@Bj99 - Awesome insight. I have definitely been doing some things wrong. I assumed (from reading the pink forum) that dancers all wanted to move things along as fast as possible. So I have probably moved to quickly and not let the dancer set the mood. And missed out on what could have been some nice conversations.

BJ can you comment more on what constitutes questions that are too personal?

Speaking of stepping back, I’ve heard cowboys like to fuck sheep at the edge of a cliff. It makes the sheep push back ! Bass bing.

Asking ab your relationship status too fast, and then not just letting whatever we say go, but digging in. Asking detailed questions ab your feeling Ana d motivations concerning the job. Asking ab drama. Anything that would take some trust. It’s best to take her lead, or talk ab ideas, the area, entertainment, and interests. A lot of dancers like talking ab their pets, which is always a safe ice breaker for women, and something ppl can relate to at any age.

Lol 25, it’s like you are on something today ;P

-->"As I scanned the room it was a trip checking out all the dudes just sitting there like creepers. Guys just siting in the corners with hoodies on, Guys just gawking with no expressions on their faces, and many with non approachable body language."

There's some funny unwritten rules of behavior at strip clubs. If you're alone, you need to have a pokerface at all times. It always cracks me up when a guy is at the tip rail, a gorgeous girl is right in front of him, and he's got one of the two approved single-clubber faces on: either completely blank and stoic, or what I call the "yeah, girl, you want it girl" false confidence face (with smirk accessory). But any hint at a public display that he's genuinely enjoying it is verboten. Exception is guys clubbing in groups -- they are allowed to show they're enjoying it, but it has to be over the top, hooting and hollaring. And of course then you get the rare unicorn, the regular in love who does NOT GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU THINK, he locks eye contact with the dancer and will not waver to look at her tits or pussy because by gum he's different than the rest of us and is going to seduce her with eye contact.

If I'm at a new club that's crowded, I tend to stay in my lane and stick with one of the approved modes of behavior above. At less crowded clubs and my regular clubs, I tend to let my face light up and show my appreciation when I appreciate her -- that's right, I'm a fucking PL outlaw (BJ, I apologize, you're probably soaked through right now)

^^^ I had a great night !

I’m practically ready for awkward from room DATY! ;)

one thing.. I don't think all strip club guys are creepers.. I just noticed many guys do look like creepers.. NOT ALL.. lol But I agree about those flashy guys not spending anything.... BJ.99 Thanks for your perspective from this mostly jaded hobby many of us partake in

@Bj99 get over here my little minx. ;p

No problem. I’m sure I learn a lot, and you guys help me to see the guys at work as ppl lol.

-->"@Bj99 - Awesome insight. I have definitely been doing some things wrong. I assumed (from reading the pink forum) that dancers all wanted to move things along as fast as possible."

Paul, I've been trying to figure out if you're a nice guy, or one of the regulars came up with an alternative account and this is his "nice guy" persona. This may have tipped things a bit -- it is very difficult for me to believe anyone reads what's said over there and believes or is guided by any of it, given that just a skim shows that so little of what they say matches with what happens in strip clubs. Maybe whoever's account this is overplayed things a bit? :) :) :) lol

@Subraman - I am a super nice guy. I am someone who went directly from living with my parents to living with my wife. Then after 20 years of marriage I decided to try out strip clubs. The problem for me was that the strip club was not at all what I expected. My personality is such that I have real trouble with things (systems) that I don't understand. The strip club is a secret world where the rules (and I would say script) are not written down anywhere. So I spent a ton of time reading the pink forum and watching stripper vlogs on youtube. That gave me a ton of insight but a lot of it was bad.

BJ, You gauge the customers perfectly ---> that sends the signal that they don’t want to talk to anyone, but are there for some reason, so we will go ask if they want a dance. Often, these are the guys who immediately say “yes,” get their dances, and either leave, or go back to hide at their table. Or they will say, “no, I’m just here waiting for a phone call.” Either way, they don’t seem to want us to hang out w them --->

everybody goes to sc for their own reasons, you are only a creeper if you have no money to spend on the girls

It's funny in that I'd say 80% or higher of the customer's at my favorite club are "regular guys". From what many dancers have told me there's 1 or 2 out of 10 who are strange. Occasionally homeless guys come in for the free Friday buffet and spend no money; or a guy who just smells bad, or a guy who quickly shows that he hates or resents women & has anger issues. But the large majority are just there for a good time which may or may not include extras. When I read reviews on this site most names are not familiar, which tells me that most members here don't write on the discussion board.

I’m one of those guys who, on occasion, comes in, sits in the corner and plays with his phone. But only if I’m waiting for someone in particular.

I’m usually polite about it when someone comes up though. I tell them I’m waiting, and “we’ll see what happens when we’re done.”

You should tell those guys, they're likely occasional visitors who aren't looking at review sites.

youtu.be

I'm not sure that you've come to the right place for introspection.