OTC at a dancer's place?

avatar for grand1511
grand1511
Euphoria
It's becoming more and more obvious that my go-to club in Minneapolis is in a tailspin that's looking pretty hard to pull out of. Visiting on dayshift to see my CF for at least the past few years I've often been the only customer in the club at happy hour time on Fridays when I'd assume should be a busier time. On top of that, my CF is transitioning into non-sex career work and often is only at the club one day a week. Our encounters have all been ITC going right up to, but not crossing, the extras line. But as I told her today, our time together has been as or more intense than the best actual sex I've ever had.

The past few visits I've mentioned that I don't want to have her slip away without being able to say goodbye and thank her for some amazing times together, figuring sooner or later she'll retire to more mainstream work. I've seen it happen many times before.

Today after our VIP time together, she asked if I'd like her number. She's thinking of seeing a limited number of her most trusted customers at her home, especially if the club closes. Going to work at bigger, more popular clubs is not an option, she said, because some of her mainstream co-workers frequent those places.

Walking out the door I was pretty ecstatic about this new possibility. But upon further review it seems wise to tap into the collective wisdom here to see what I should be wary of if this indeed happens and I end up going for lap dances-plus at her place. Thoughts?

36 comments

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avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
The general rule is: don't go to her place

A smart man knows to follow the rule. A wise man knows when to break it. If you've been seeing her for **years**, and there's absolutely no warning signs that are nagging at you even a little bit, that you're not telling us about ... sure, I'd consider it.

On the other other hand, if you counter-offered "let me take you to dinner and then I'll get a hotel room" (or alternatively, if she's worried about discretion, "I'll get a hotel room and we'll order room service and drinks") would she turn that down and insist you go to her house? If so, why?

I think the weirdest thing about this story is: you've known her for years, and never had her number??? And never suggested OTC before? We might have to invite you to Tuscl Institute so our crack team of scientists can dissect your brain :)
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
7 years ago
Also, by "crack team of scientists", I mean juice. And by "dissect your brain", I mean give you a rusty trombone
avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman
7 years ago
Grand, given that you’ve known her for a long time, I think the biggest question is what is her living situation? Loser boyfriend, bad part of town, that sort of thing. I think from your reviews and comments, you might be in Subraman’s “wise man” situation if you’re not walking into a bad scene.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
Why not offer to take her to lunch and then a hotel for a private? The hotel will be cheaper than vip, and it’s byob.
avatar for SCPandit
SCPandit
7 years ago
I see most strippers otc, I started just going and getting lap dances but very soon it just wasn't enough. This lifestyle consumed me and I became the disgusting fantasy I've always rngorged myself with, OTC is the best but you need to be careful because these are her "trusted" customers and she may begin to allow them to have unprotected sex because they are "trusted" this creates a higher chance of risk and on top of that you have to remember with all these things going on in the world you need to be careful how you approach women when alone and in the "safety" of there own home. I would do it but be very careful, never trust a working girl.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
7 years ago
Q. What's the worst thing about having sex at a stripper's home?
A. Waiting in the line that stretches around the block.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
Keep seeing her in the club - while she’s still there. When you see her - use some of that time to get more details of her plans for her OTC setup. Find out about her living situation too. Then offer OTC - as mentioned above - at a hotel - with drinks and dinner. If she won’t do OTC at the hotel - that would be odd. If she’s worried about seeing others at the hotel - ask her to suggest a hotel that might be safer for her.
avatar for PeterEaster
PeterEaster
7 years ago
@grand1511 - Had a similar situation when my old club closed. Dancer said she was going to miss seeing me every week, asked to exchange numbers so we could keep in touch, since I was her favorite customer, etc. To make a long story short, her transition plan was to be become an escort, with her club regulars as her first clients. I chose not to partake (escorts are not my "thang"). Of course, I don't know your dancer, so this may or may not apply.
avatar for realDougster
realDougster
7 years ago

I guess I should of closed my eyes
When you drove me to the place
Where your horses run free
'Cause I felt a little ill
When I saw all the pictures
Of the jockeys that were there before me
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
7 years ago
Find a nice girl and get married.
avatar for whodey
whodey
7 years ago
Take skibum's advice and "Find a nice girl and get married." Then find a nice new stripper that your wife doesn't know about. That seems to be the path as lot of TUSCLers take.

Personally I would skip the first step and just find a nice new stripper, and new strip club based on your description. It's cheaper that way.

As to the OTC, like others have said I prefer hotels for all my otc activities, but if it's a girl that I have seen and trusted for a while I have gone to her place. The one thing that I won't do is bring her to my place. I have never found a stripper that I trust that much.
avatar for JohnTitor
JohnTitor
7 years ago
SS
avatar for Ch3ll
Ch3ll
7 years ago
As Subraman mentioned it's rather weird that you've been going in to see her the past couple years and no number exchange has happened. Did you get any kind of contact info prior this as far as communicating?

Aside from the above I wonder what has your spending been on her?

But to answer the question I'd go over to her place if there haven't been any red flags raised since y'all have been seeing each other at the club. As others have mentioned, the alternative, neutral location would be some public activities and a nice hotel afterward. If she were to turn that down I'd be suspicious.

I've been to two dancers place for otc. However, our first few OTCs were at a hotel. One was in the wee hours of the morning, like 6 am when the sun was coming up so I wasn't too worried. Another because no hotels were available due to a big college event going on. I was skeptical, but everything turned out to be okay.
avatar for bubba267
bubba267
7 years ago
Been there, done that. Meet in a "neutral" hotel that you pick and she meets you at. If you can establish that comfort over several visits then you can potentially visit her place. There are ways to ask her about her living situation - with a "roommate" , alone, pit-bulls. You get the picture.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
@ skibum, stop trying to make the marriage thing happen. You just want more business. :P
avatar for NaturalSelection
NaturalSelection
7 years ago
I pretty much align with Bubba's approach. I prefer the hotel but over time I might offer her the hotel fee if she'd be comfortable with me at her place.

I asked how dangerous OTC at her place is a while back. Here's a link. Not one single TUSCLer offered a personnel story that gives me pause. There were some what-if's and I-saw-on-tv's but no first hand accounts.
https://www.tuscl.net/?page=post&id=4989…

If you have a great relationship with, go for it at her place. Sounds like you have a good relationship with her that could become great, I probably would try a hotel the first time and decide based on that.
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
7 years ago
i’ve had no problem at her place, my place, hotel, or whatever so far.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
I think it depends on your level of trust with a particular dancer, I have had several over the years that we went to her apartment or home, I’ve never had a problem with the ones I’ve known long term.
avatar for SneakySecret2
SneakySecret2
7 years ago
I’ve never done OTC, but I would probably feel more comfortable in a hotel, just to avoid potential issues that might even be non-issues with living situations
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
7 years ago
I guess I'm one that needs my brain disected (but no rusty trombone thank you) because I don’t pursue OTC action. I may be naive here, but I don't see reason to have concern here. After knowing her for a few years I would think you'd know her well enough to know whether you should be wary.
avatar for anthonyu
anthonyu
7 years ago
I've arranged to see dancer's OTC a number of times, always at hotels. Mostly they don't show up. But a few times they did and it was good.

But, I've seen escorts at their place (in-call) dozens of times. I never had any problem. Seems to me it would be safer to meet a stripper that you know and know something about at her place than in-call with an unknown escort.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
I’d just think that going to her house could disillusion you, and be less neutral, than a hotel of your choosing.
avatar for Darkblue999
Darkblue999
7 years ago
Ask her if she can work at least a day a week in the club. Avoid OTCs.It will ruin you. They arw not girl friends.They are entertainers. Keep the fantasy within the club.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
7 years ago
Extremely provocative dancer at the Sunnyvale Hip Hugger, "I have my own apartment now."

SJG

OT: Are Traditional Colleges and Universities Bad Environments?
https://www.tuscl.net/?page=post&id=5066…

"We live in capitalism. Its power seems inescapable. So did the divine right of kings. Any human power can be resisted and changed by human beings. Resistance and change often begin in art, and very often in our art, the art of words."
https://www.democracynow.org/2018/1/24/f…

Emergency Life Boat Forum, join, save info in emails to yourself
http://testosteronelifeboat.freeforums.n…
avatar for joeblow44
joeblow44
7 years ago
If you have known her for a couple of years, chances are it will be fine. I did OTC with a girl that I've been seeing in the club for a couple of years and had a great time. I got to know her fairly well and felt comfortable seeing her OTC at her place. As others have suggested, if you have reservations about going to her place, float the idea of going to a hotel. If that goes well, then try her place on the next go around.
avatar for gawker
gawker
7 years ago
My first visit to my ATF's townhouse was when her live-in BF was in state prison. We were supposed to meet at a hotel and she called me screaming and it was all I could do to get the address..
When I arrived she was outside in the parking lot still screaming cuz she had found a bedbug in her hair. I went inside & lifted the corner of the mattress and saw hundreds of the little critters swarming on the box spring. For the next two hours I worked like a rented mule throwing the bed in the dumpster, bagging all the clothes in about 20 trash bags to take to the laundry to have it put through a very hot wash, put all food in the refrigerator, and finally have an exterminator in.
She and I went to the hotel as planned, showered together, smoked some weed, and she complained about me having too much pubic hair and I replied that she could use a shave herself. So she manscaped me and I shaved her pussy
After that we used her house frequently cuz she talked me into giving her the money I'd have spent for the room.
There are a couple of other dancers I've been with at their home with no adverse effects
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
Gawker - your atf has a way for drama to find her. She’s incredible - an insane body - and the sexual talents of a porn star!
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
Go old school and fuck her in a Burger King bathroom
avatar for FTS
FTS
7 years ago
"Our encounters have all been ITC going right up to, but not crossing, the extras line. But as I told her today, our time together has been as or more intense than the best actual sex I've ever had."

- Seems like she's either stringing you along for money and has no desire to sleep with you, or she's controlling herself because she doesn't want to get in trouble by doing stuff ITC. If its the former, get the hell outa there cuz it's a waste of time. If it's a latter then she'll have no problem with a spontaneous meeting in a hotel. As BJ99 said, get her out to lunch, and then pick a hotel and go.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
One should be more-careful if it's a girl one just met (e.g. doing OTC after her shift the same night you met her; or after only being w/ her ITC once or twice).

If you've known her for a while, and she's transitioning into "mainstream work", would lead one to think she's fairly-stable.

In the past, several TUSCLers have posted about going to a fave's home and I don't recall any bad experiences posted except some posting seeing someone at the home they were not expecting (her-mom, her kid(s), sometimes a BF she'll say it's her brother); but that's not necessarily the norm and it seems it works out for most PLs - have also read some posters post their fave's home/apt was a mess.
avatar for gothamyte
gothamyte
7 years ago
I've done and had no problems

My only warning is this: be wary about visiting a stripper's place because she knows you're coming with money. Exactly when and how much. Be wary of being ambushed or robbed at her place either by her setting it up, or indirectly like she happens to mention it absentmindedly to someone who takes it upon themselves to wait for you in the parking lot to rob you and she didn't even know. I always say people become funny when it comes to money. Even if things go great for a year and you ORC with her regularly. There's that one day she thinks to herself "ol' buddy is coming here with that $300 at 6pm. What if i....."

So be careful.
avatar for orionsmith
orionsmith
7 years ago
I never thought a dancers place could have lots of bugs. That would make me want to stay away. I don't like to go to a girls place if I just met her and don't even know her name or anything. I've been asked to leave and come over. I don't think 1 minute nor even 15 minutes is enough time to build up enough trust unless you've already had a BJ or sex then I might trust her a little. If she was a 10 though and asked me to come over after I just met her, might take a chance. For some odd reason when I was younger, one or two lap dances seemed to be enough to trust a dancer enough to go over to her place. I've also read that guys don't think rationally after seeing something pretty like a nice pair of tits. Just remember if she flashes her tits and says come over to my place, it might be a setup. I haven't read about any female criminals doing this yet though. It would be a good tactic though.
avatar for orionsmith
orionsmith
7 years ago
Strippers had their places pretty clean when they had planned for me to come over with enough warning. I've let a few girls drag me to every bar in town and then over to their place on a few nights without giving it much thought. That was years ago when I was more concerned with getting stopped by the police than any stripper trying to set me up. The police were more of a hassle in some towns and more of a concern than any potential criminals. Some police in some small towns will follow you after leaving a club waiting for the tiniest infraction to pull you over. They may even follow you for miles and stay right on your tail making you wonder what jackass is behind you. If you speed up and take a chance they are not a cop, suddenly you see blue lights. Sucks. After two episodes, I just assume it's a cop if they are following me.
avatar for anthonyu
anthonyu
7 years ago
gothamyte wrote: "be wary about visiting a stripper's place because she knows you're coming with money. Exactly when and how much. Be wary of being ambushed or robbed at her place either by her setting it up..."

Why on Earth would she set up a robbery? Sure she knows you're coming with money. But she also knows she going to get that money after about an hour that could be fun for her as well as you. It makes no sense to screw up what could be on-going lucrative business arrangement.

Not the strippers, or any other group, are always sensible.
avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
7 years ago
I would never do this. But, if I did, it would only be after a *long* period of getting to know her and building something in the vicinity of trust.
avatar for larryfisherman
larryfisherman
7 years ago
You said you’ve known her for a few years? I wouldn’t worry about safety. Have a good time!
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