Well my CF finally did it

lotsoffun201
Vegas Baby
I’ve been around the clubs long enough to see it. I know how to react and handle it. Funny thing is that I never expected it from her.

I don’t club all that much anymore but have a CF that I see. Eastern European, single mom, etc. always a casual relationship and I see her periodically when I have time.

Last week I get the text.... wants to borrow money, slow at work, etc. She just went from CF to just another stripper in the amount of time it took me to read the text.

27 comments

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GoVikings
7 years ago
has she ever asked to borrow money before or is this the first time?
Lurker_X
7 years ago
There are some stories here of PLs that took a minor gamble on a small loan, let her "work it off" later. If you are sure the stripper is relatively committed to her club and staying in town, it can be worth it. But you do need to be mentally prepared to get burned.
mark94
7 years ago
On the SW site, they have a meditation about how they are money magnets and deserve to have money flow to them. There is nothing in that meditation about providing service for the money.
mark94
7 years ago
I have one fave who recently asked a series of questions, where do I live, do I own a home, what work do I do........... I think she is pre-qualifying me as a source of money. Not the first time that has happened.
lotsoffun201
7 years ago
Well it was $500 and truthfully while I can afford it, and wouldn’t worry about losing it, it’s just the principle of it. Never did any OTC with her but it’s been offered.

To me, it’s just not worth it since even if she does “pay it back” or I take it out “in trade”. It will then become a regular thing asking for $$$$$
larryfisherman
7 years ago
I’ve haven’t had that yet, but if I did, she would be cut off so fast.
georgmicrodong
7 years ago
If she's offered OTC sex previously, the proper response to that was "How about I take you up on that offer instead. Hotel. Dinner. Sex."

I don't know what market you're in, but here in Louisville, that amount would have been an invitation to discuss an overnight stay.

joc13
7 years ago
That's pretty much what happened with the stripper I saw OTC a couple times. She asked for "advances" against our upcoming OTCs or against dances in the club, and she did a good job of actually settling up. But, she would start asking for small amounts all the time (wouldn't say borrow; would imply give). Would say things like "I understand if you can't" or "$200, but $100 is ok" - makes me wonder if there is a "SW System" written somewhere that she was following.

When I finally broke things off, she even complained that I wasn't treating her well enough cause it was too hard for her to get $30 or $40 out of me. There wouldn't have been any issue if there had been adequate expressions of gratitude, but there wasn't. Found me an SA girl instead who says stuff like "it's ok if you give me less cause we only had time to fuck once last night". Which, of course, makes me appreciate her, and I end up seeing her more and spending more on her.
Subraman
7 years ago
I think you have to go with your gut. But, like many of the guys above, if I *did* want to keep seeing her and want to have sex with her, something along georgmicrodong's line, "How about I take you up on that offer instead." She gets her $, you get what you want, win-win. To cut off any further requests, at the end of your OTC, after you've gotten the sex, you somehow organically slip into the conversation, "I really enjoyed this. In general I'm not comfortable lending money, but you can feel free to suggest doing this again, and if I'm free, I'm game". (in other words, let her know you won't be lending her money, don't ask, but proposing OTC is fine).

joc13: I've gotten this type of pattern more from SA girls than strippers! Got one just last week, her car broke down (she sent me pics!) and asked for help. Again, part of my outlook on why SA is no panacea.


Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
Anyone can be in a tough spot where they need to borrow some $$$ - unfortunately this often sets a precedent that often becomes a slippery slope with dancers b/c they seem to have recurring "emergencies" or recurring times "when the club is slow", or "they got sick and couldn't go into work", etc.

I don't mind lending someone $$$$, but when it comes to strip club bizarro-world I don't give the benefit of the doubt and assume it will get worse from there if I set a precedent.

These girls for the most part only want us in their lives when it comes to $$$ - in their personal lives they often have a fairly large circle of friends and acquaintances, family, and men/lovers - as far as I'm concerned let those in her *personal* life help her with her personal problems b/c after all we are just petty-much ATMs to them and nothing more, and we are usually "out of sight out of mind" to them unless they need $omething from us.
SirLapdancealot
7 years ago
I would never loan a stripper any money. Maybe the only exception would be with one that did dances for me on a 'dance tab' where I could LOL pay her back for them later. But since that will never happen, I just don't ever do it.

But I wouldn't drop a CF/ATF unless she was persistent and it was a term of our relationship. She can ask for a loan but she won't ever get it. And if that means she doesn't want me as a regular anymore, no problem!
jackslash
7 years ago
This is the first time she asked to borrow money? Are you sure she's a stripper?

I get these requests all the time, and if I cut off every stripper who asked I would be pretty lonely. I don't blame them for asking. I usually tell them no. Some favs who I've been banging regularly I will lend a little cash (like $200). Do they ever repay me? No. But I don't mind sharing a little of the wealth with a young lady who pretends to like sucking my wizened old dick.
Lone_Wolf
7 years ago
Often they ask for loan but are really offering p4p OTC and seeing if you'll bite. Whenever I've said "no" to such requests, I've never seen a decline in the quality if services given ITC or OTC.

Conversely, when I've stupidly given the, never-to-be-repaid "loan", I've never seen an increase in quality of services offered either...besides maybe given higher priority.
joc13
7 years ago
@subraman oh, I know. I've met plenty of beggars on SA - My current girl just happens to be a good exception.

Unfortunately, I think the universe has put hotness and lack of hassle at opposite ends of a sliding scale. You can only increase one by decreasing the other.

My current SA girl is very hassle free but not the hottest chick around. Nice enough to take out in public, but not going to make anyone jealous (unless they happened to see the BBBJDTCIM I got in the car _before_ we walked into the club or restaurant :-).
Rick999
7 years ago
Sometimes loaning money to a stripper can be considered a going away present. That is you loan her money and she disappears never to be seen or heard from again. She quits the club, loses your number and disappears.
Rick999
7 years ago
If a stripper is moving, what better time to con people? She will be gone in days.
Subraman
7 years ago
jackslash-->"I get these requests all the time, and if I cut off every stripper who asked I would be pretty lonely. I don't blame them for asking. I usually tell them no. Some favs who I've been banging regularly I will lend a little cash (like $200). Do they ever repay me? No. But I don't mind sharing a little of the wealth with a young lady who pretends to like sucking my wizened old dick."

I think there's just a natural evolution in how you look at things. A guy who has never experienced this before, is going to have lotsoffun's reaction: "WTF! Fucking bitch! I'm crossing her off my list". A guy who has been clubbing for decades can handle it a bit more dispassionately, after the zillionth time he's been asking. Partly, it's not something new to him so doesn't kick off all kinds of defensive instincts. Partly, he doesn't feel nervous or uncomfortable about counterproposing something that meets HIS needs, too.

I've had an ATF with whom I sometimes floated her money before our OTC (I refuse to do Western Union and this was years ago before Venmo, so she actually gave me her checking account number and real name, and I'd just go to the bank and put cash in her account), and she always came through. On more than one occasion during OTC, I spent more cash than I expected on partying, drinking, dinner, so that I couldn't pay her all I owed her at the end of the night, I'd offer to take us to the ATM but she'd just wave her hand and tell me to put it in her account tomorrow. So, as I always say: you need to be smart enough to have rules, and wise enough to know when you should break them.
Jascoi
7 years ago
i'll be very surprised if i ever get repaid the remaining three grand i loaned to a stripper. she worked off the first portion of the loan. that was nice. but that stopped almost a year ago.
a few years ago she had a rollover accident and blew out her double ds. all she had afterwards were bee stings. it killed her income. and her self worth. so i had a sizeable savings at the time and helped her get new boobs. she started doing well dancing... butt i didn't realize at that time just how much a druggie she became in the meantime. so all her efforts at making money seems to be spent on opium now. and she moved out of the area. hope she starts doing better.
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
The OP mentioned he doesn't club that often these days and sees her casually; and OTC has been offered before - seems to me he's not interested in seeing her more often than he currently does, nor in OTC - thus the advice of setting something up with her in exchange for the $$$, w/e that may entail, is a moot point in the OP's case, IMO
loper
7 years ago
What's an SA girl?
Papi_Chulo
7 years ago
SA = SeekingArrangements.com

It's a sugardaddy website
lotsoffun201
7 years ago
We’ve done some ITC before she went to another club. New place’s she’s been to aren’t as liberal. That’s why she suggested OTC, but if I’m going to part with $$$$$, then it’s on my terms, not hers.
joewebber
7 years ago
if you loan them money with the promise of them 'making it up to you', they will forget, and you will never see it again.
also, if you think she will give you a free vip in exchange for the money she owes you, she will tell you that she can't because the DJ/Floorman, whoever, counts the vips she has, and it will come out of her tip-out.

just don't do it.

you'll start to get the texts monthly, around the same time she needs to pay that bill.
TXbananas
7 years ago
I don't see the need for a loan, she should be working for it. Don't be a sucka!
georgmicrodong
7 years ago
@Subraman: "I think there's just a natural evolution in how you look at things. A guy who has never experienced this before, is going to have lotsoffun's reaction: 'WTF! Fucking bitch! I'm crossing her off my list'. A guy who has been clubbing for decades can handle it a bit more dispassionately, after the zillionth time he's been asking."

What you said!

Opportunity knocks far more often than many people think. Answer that door!
shailynn
7 years ago
If you aren’t fucking her then you shouldn’t be “loaning” or giving her any money.
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