I’ve fallen for several civilian women - and those were some great times. Those are experiences I will always remember - as those feelings were intense and amazing.
However, this discussion is about the pitfalls associated with falling for a stripper. I remember - that T-Pain song made it sound like fun!
Yup...
Was jaded for a while. Then I met a dancer. We got along well. Similar personalities. Similar likes. I honestly think she had feelings for me. Wouldn’t dance for me. Wouldn’t take money. Would sit with me at the club, not earning and not asking. She was going thru a divorce. Bought her a small birthday gift, like $30ish. Made her cry as it hit her the right way that I got her. We were trading texts for a while. She just stopped texting me. Been three months since she texted me. She went back to her husband.
When it happened to me, it was more of a damsel in distress thing, like seeing a dog stuck in a canal that is going to drown if you don't help it get out. She used a domestic violence hustle, so I was doing whatever I could to help her get out of the situation. It eventually ran its course and she finally said, oh, that was like two boyfriends ago.
More like infatuation. I've been infatuated with several strippers through the years. Some of them are just very good at what they do. Even a grizzled veteran can be fooled from time to time. Happens to the best of us.
I wouldn't say I've gotten burned. At some point I just decide to cut off the money and then they turn off the charm. But over time, I've learned how to fake it myself. I fake being infatuated with a dancer I've gotten to know well. Sometimes I'll even throw the L-word around. They start thinking they have a real sucker on their hands, but they also start to feel more comfortable around me and they become willing to do more things to reel me in further. It sounds strange, but it seems to work. You guys are probably doing it, too, but you may not realize it.
I have yet to meet a stripper I think I could spend a three day weekend with, let alone fall in love with one. Love is more than a hard-on, but my retirement will be funded by people who think lust is love.
Yes and not really burned. Other than I had feelings for her that I knew weren't reciprocated. She was and is an exceptionally cool chick. Brought her around family and friends. She handled herself exceptionally well. I've seriously never met anyone like her. 20 years my junior I enjoyed spoiling her. I spent a lot of money but at the same time I had the absolute best time of my life. I'd do it all over again. Somethings I'd do differently but it was worth it to me. But then I'd been in a really fucked up miserable marriage for a loooong time. The fact my X hated this young hot blonde spinner with a passion didn't hurt either.
Has never happened yet, but it always is possible. But it would take her saying I don't want any compensation for out time together. For her to text me for some other reason than to come to the club or I need money. With no money involved and her interest in me the same as if money were involved it could happen
I've never fallen in love but I had a period of having a huge crush on my ATF DS for a few months when we started really talking as friends and she shared a lot of personal information with me. It was easy to keep the relationship sexual only when that is all it was, but after getting to know her I became attracted to her personality on top of her physical appearance and sex appeal. Over time the crush faded, but it was undeniable for a while.
Can you trust a stripper really? I had one with 6 kids 4 baby fathers and she stopped dancing and went to school but went right back to stripping once there in there in they wont stop take it from its always gonna be you sharing them. They're sneaky thats how they survive
I once had a dancer insist on me telling her I love her after she kept saying the same about me. I was never sure what that was all about, After her real boyfriend left her, she did try to make me her new boyfriend but I wasn't in love with her. I liked her but told her goodbye because I was moving for a new job. I never got burned like the stock market can burn you on a bad trade but I have been taken for more than I cared for many years ago.
Yes. I enjoyed being infatuated with her and throwing money at her for affection. Sucked really bad when she decided to quit and cutoff all contact. My dumb ass thought I would still be able to see her once she quit because "we're friends" but I was definitely wrong. Whatever, I'd do it again, was fun while it lasted.
I always thought rule #1 was always wear a condom during any p4p sex?
Not sure which is more dangerous, bareback p4p or falling in love with a stripper. One can ruin your physical health and the other can ruin your mental health.
When I was in my mid/late 20s, I had an ATF at the Satin Doll in Providence that I fell for pretty hard. I hadn't seen her OTC and I hadn't even gotten extras from her ITC (I was such a naive noob). But, she and I really "connected". We talked a lot. She told me about her son. We really hit it off. Etc., etc.
So, after I'd been going to see her (and spend money on her) weekly for perhaps 2 to 3 months I decided to take the plunge and tell her how I felt and ask her out on a date. And I did! When I was done asking her out, she looked at me with real disappointment and said (summarizing), "Sweetie, you're a customer. And I'm never going to date a customer. Maybe you should start hanging out with another girl."
So, in a way, I actually did find my rainbow unicorn stripper. But instead of the her magically transforming from sex worker to loyal-but-sex-crazed girlfriend, I found the one stripper that was nice enough to not strip mine a RIL for all the cash he's worth.
I was heartbroken (but lucky to not be financially ruined) and that led to my first long break from strip clubbing. When I got back into it, I had a very different mindset. I like the strippers I see in and out of the club, and I may consider them casual friends. But no more than that.
@mdfmk888 said "I'm going to try this . . . starting tomorrow."
Go for it, man. Just make sure it's a dancer whom you've known for at least a month or two, otherwise she'll just think you're nuts. Regardless, they will mock you behind your back in the dressing room as soon as one of them smells blood in the water. That's their nature. But then again, they probably mock most of us anyway, right? So it's the same difference.
I'm still not exactly sure why it works for me, but it seems to. Plus it's just emotionally satisfying to know that you're bullshitting them at the same time that they're bullshitting you.
No but I do have a crush on one, it’s probably because I feel like we have chemistry as a result of building rapport, she’s told me personal stuff like that she’s shy outside of the club and what she used to do because she mentioned she had a boat license
She even told me what town she lives in so I know she lives an hour from the club not that I’d stalk her
Also she doesn’t seem to be opposed to
giving me free lapdances when she’s on the podium, the only other person I’ve seen her give dances was drunk and paying her
@Ishmael - your story is excellent. It’s one that other younger PL’s should read - and learn from. You were lucky that she didn’t just drain your wallet (while stringing you along). We live and learn - and hopefully the learning isn’t too costly.
Some strippers are excellent at creating the feeling that a customer is special to them - and generally a newbie - is ripe for taking the experience and personalizing it to the point that he falls for the stripper - and then the stripper can take him for a very expensive ride.
As much as we say “Don’t fall for her. She’s a pro at creating the illusion.” - there will be newbies who want to believe the illusion.
Probably rule #2 is "Do not try to be a savior". These girls come with a sack if pre-mixed problems. I don't mind minor favors like buying some nachos in the club if she is hungry, or offering a ride. But I am merely a sympathetic ear for whatever immediate jam is that she is trying to handle.
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SJG
So no. I’ve fallen in lust for a few strippers - but that feeling goes away shortly after I cum.
I’ve dated a couple of strippers, but there was definitely no love on my part lol.
SJG
However, this discussion is about the pitfalls associated with falling for a stripper. I remember - that T-Pain song made it sound like fun!
Was jaded for a while. Then I met a dancer. We got along well. Similar personalities. Similar likes. I honestly think she had feelings for me. Wouldn’t dance for me. Wouldn’t take money. Would sit with me at the club, not earning and not asking. She was going thru a divorce. Bought her a small birthday gift, like $30ish. Made her cry as it hit her the right way that I got her. We were trading texts for a while. She just stopped texting me. Been three months since she texted me. She went back to her husband.
Oh well.
SJG
Lol Cashman that T-Pain song did make it sound fun.
I wouldn't say I've gotten burned. At some point I just decide to cut off the money and then they turn off the charm. But over time, I've learned how to fake it myself. I fake being infatuated with a dancer I've gotten to know well. Sometimes I'll even throw the L-word around. They start thinking they have a real sucker on their hands, but they also start to feel more comfortable around me and they become willing to do more things to reel me in further. It sounds strange, but it seems to work. You guys are probably doing it, too, but you may not realize it.
That’s good you got out of that mdfmk888.
SJG
SJG
+15
SJG
Hand of Fate - Stones
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKH9enYi…
Not sure which is more dangerous, bareback p4p or falling in love with a stripper. One can ruin your physical health and the other can ruin your mental health.
So, after I'd been going to see her (and spend money on her) weekly for perhaps 2 to 3 months I decided to take the plunge and tell her how I felt and ask her out on a date. And I did! When I was done asking her out, she looked at me with real disappointment and said (summarizing), "Sweetie, you're a customer. And I'm never going to date a customer. Maybe you should start hanging out with another girl."
So, in a way, I actually did find my rainbow unicorn stripper. But instead of the her magically transforming from sex worker to loyal-but-sex-crazed girlfriend, I found the one stripper that was nice enough to not strip mine a RIL for all the cash he's worth.
I was heartbroken (but lucky to not be financially ruined) and that led to my first long break from strip clubbing. When I got back into it, I had a very different mindset. I like the strippers I see in and out of the club, and I may consider them casual friends. But no more than that.
It works for me.
@jester and whodey- both very important rules, but I would say don’t fall in love is the most important.
Go for it, man. Just make sure it's a dancer whom you've known for at least a month or two, otherwise she'll just think you're nuts. Regardless, they will mock you behind your back in the dressing room as soon as one of them smells blood in the water. That's their nature. But then again, they probably mock most of us anyway, right? So it's the same difference.
I'm still not exactly sure why it works for me, but it seems to. Plus it's just emotionally satisfying to know that you're bullshitting them at the same time that they're bullshitting you.
She even told me what town she lives in so I know she lives an hour from the club not that I’d stalk her
Also she doesn’t seem to be opposed to
giving me free lapdances when she’s on the podium, the only other person I’ve seen her give dances was drunk and paying her
If you remember that it kinda takes care of the not falling in love thing.
BTW, yes I have forgotten my rule #1 a few times. Luckily they have been only short term lapses.
As much as we say “Don’t fall for her. She’s a pro at creating the illusion.” - there will be newbies who want to believe the illusion.