Purely hypothetical - as I know that most would never date a dancer. However, if you were dating a dancer, would you go to the club when she was working? I don’t see anything good that might come from this - so I’d avoid it. I’m interested to hear why a bf might visit his gf’s club.
You make a good point regarding being insecure. I consider myself to be pretty secure. However, I’m wondering if my personal feelings of security might change when stepping into the club to see my girlfriend working in a bikini (or less).
It’s most likely something I’ll never experience, but I’m wondering if my theory of being secure would change when put to the test.
i guess it just requires a different psychology to date a stripper in the first place. I've always wondered how so many strippers get BFs AFTER they start dancing and keep them. Maybe if they work at a low contact/low mileage bikini bar, they're pretty much like a friendly Hooter's waitress. I guess the guys just want that stripper pussy for basically free anyway they can get it even if they have to share it somewhat.
At first, I would go. But after a while it would get old and boring. Also, if we're really dating, I think I might become a distraction for her. I've seen that happen once or twice. Plus, while I'm there, I might see a dancer who is hotter than the GF, and I wouldn't be able to get any dances. That's no bueno.
As for being insecure, it honestly wouldn't matter if she were blowing half the dudes in the club and screwing the other half. Obviously, if this bothered me, in this hypothetical situation, then I wouldn't be dating a stripper in the first place (because that's what lots of them do). It would only bother me if she came home one day and said that she had fallen in love with one of the PLs. I guess I might be a little insecure about that.
No. I listened to a stripper go on and on about how jealous she gets the other day, and this was a dancer who was trying to entice me to call her for a date.
I have always said you can't make someone change after you meat them.
There are a lot of guys that get off on seeing their girl do nasty things with other men.
Saturday at follies there appeared to be at least one stripper that had her boyfriend there. He was sitting at the bar and she kept making rounds to him. Looked like she was bringing him drinks. LOL The things you can see while taking a stroll.
If I had the mental makeup to date a dancer then I'd have the mental-makeup to visit her at the club as long as she was ok with it (e.g. if she wanted to chill in b/w dances, etc)
Interesting 2 threads. I'll post in this one tho. I've dated 2 seriously. 1 told me straight up what she does, the whole 9. 2nd said she's clean.
It only works if you're secure and she is Brutally honest about it all. We would lay and she would show her DMs and texts from custys and laugh at them. So I've seen what most PLs would most like to keep hidden, most are REALLY Pathetic. I'm serious! Lame to the extreme. So I've seen the game played from both sides, and seen guys strung along like cattle to slaughter. There's a reason we're called PLs.
As to the going to the club? On rare occasion. I'm not that kind of stripper BF to be Uber and hangout. That's her Biz not mine.
"... We would lay and she would show her DMs and texts from custys and laugh at them ... So I've seen the game played */both sides ..."
Yeap - that's why I think most PLs have an unrealistic "sense of security" w.r.t. how their faves sees/thinks-of them - IMO many think their fave sees them as special or above other custies and in reality it's usually b/c said PL is just more consistent as an income-source than other PLs, IMO - and yeah I know, "there are exceptions"
If I were the club DJ, I would still go into work and keep our relationship on the DL. Otherwise, boyfriends are not really allowed in at most clubs from what I hear. There are exceptions, of course, for the guys who only think they are dancers' boyfriends.
I'd see my ATF at the club when we were also dating, because I wasn't paying her for the dates. If I were...I'd probably see her ITC anyway. I had a huge crush on her!! LOL
If I were stupid enough to date a stripper, I know that I should not see her at work because it would make me jealous. However, staying at home and imagining what she is doing in lap dances would make me even more jealous, so I'd probably go into the club to check on her periodically even thought i know that I shouldn't.
I've never dated a stripper in the traditional sense of dating. I have met a number of them online and arrange to fuck them when I travel to their town for work. It's been great fun.
One I took to a club and we had a great time. A month or so ago I stopped by the club to see another girl I was banging. I had never seen her dance and thought it would be fun. It was fun, we had a great time talking about the club and other dancers too. In fact we discussed which ones we might like to have join us for a three-way! I even took her to VIP for a few dances. But I didn't stay long and a little while later she joined me in my room for an overnight visit.
As for truly dating a stripper, I seriously doubt I would ever do that.
I think every reply should be required to start off with "If I were stupid enough to date a stripper". So, if I were stupid enough to date a stripper, I definitely would not visit her at the club, for a number of reasons. Most clubs around here seem to have rules about "no stripper boyfriends", if they suspect there's a real relationship they toss the guy. I imagine in the dive and mid-range clubs, this keeps out not just boyfriends, but very often pimps. In high end clubs, it cuts down on drama in general.
Once you are seeing her outside, best to say away from her club. Avoid feeding money to the club, have better times with her in private. Let her do her job without your infringing on her.
"... Most clubs around here seem to have rules about "no stripper boyfriends", if they suspect there's a real relationship they toss the guy ..."
I had a bit of a run-in w/ an unbeknownst to me stripper-BF.
It was a Miami small black super-dive - no-cover ever - no door person or any bouncers/security, usually just 2-employees, the bartender (usually an older ex-dancer) and the dance-counter/"manager" (since dancers have to give a $3-cut of each $10 dance).
Was getting-dances w/ a brickhouse ebony bar-side - a dark-skinned mid to late 20s AA guy stands on the other side of her leaning against the bar while she's dancing for me - the guy says something to her which I did not understand/hear (she was in b/w us), then all of a sudden he grabs her by the arm and pulls her real-hard towards the floor - w/o thinking about it (reflex reaction) I jump out of my seat and slap his arm away - I had no idea who he was and thought it was just some random custy assaulting her (or a jealous reg or w/e) - I stand in front of my dancer and the dude is yapping away at my face - I remain calm but ready to defend myself (especially since he was about my-size so I wasn't intimidated and kinda pissed at what he did and barging in on my dances that I'm paying for; again I am not aware it's her man) - the manager/dance-counter comes running over and gets b/w me and the douche and says to my dancer "Mocha control your man", and that's when it crossed my mind it was her BF which a few-seconds later I confirmed w/ her - anyway the dude was asked to leave the club and Mocha kept dancing for me making her $$$, LOL - the dude seemed to be drunk and I guess he'd been there a while getting drunk.
Def not a good idea for me to get involved, but again it was kinda a reflex-reaction that happened out-of-the-blue completely unexpected and at the moment it all came across as some random dude assaulting a dancer that was dancing for me.
I was never worried about b/f's etc. but when I was dating my ATF her g/f was really my competition. She was also a dancer regular of mind as I eventually found out. My ATF was wise...she invited me to her apt with the her s/o dancer there as we had fun...and I remain friends with both even though neither dances anymore.
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It’s most likely something I’ll never experience, but I’m wondering if my theory of being secure would change when put to the test.
As for being insecure, it honestly wouldn't matter if she were blowing half the dudes in the club and screwing the other half. Obviously, if this bothered me, in this hypothetical situation, then I wouldn't be dating a stripper in the first place (because that's what lots of them do). It would only bother me if she came home one day and said that she had fallen in love with one of the PLs. I guess I might be a little insecure about that.
There are a lot of guys that get off on seeing their girl do nasty things with other men.
Saturday at follies there appeared to be at least one stripper that had her boyfriend there. He was sitting at the bar and she kept making rounds to him. Looked like she was bringing him drinks. LOL The things you can see while taking a stroll.
But, if I were dating one, I certainly would not go to the club. It is simply because I would be a distraction, and nothing to do with being insecure.
It only works if you're secure and she is Brutally honest about it all. We would lay and she would show her DMs and texts from custys and laugh at them. So I've seen what most PLs would most like to keep hidden, most are REALLY Pathetic. I'm serious! Lame to the extreme. So I've seen the game played from both sides, and seen guys strung along like cattle to slaughter. There's a reason we're called PLs.
As to the going to the club? On rare occasion. I'm not that kind of stripper BF to be Uber and hangout. That's her Biz not mine.
Yeap - that's why I think most PLs have an unrealistic "sense of security" w.r.t. how their faves sees/thinks-of them - IMO many think their fave sees them as special or above other custies and in reality it's usually b/c said PL is just more consistent as an income-source than other PLs, IMO - and yeah I know, "there are exceptions"
:)
One I took to a club and we had a great time. A month or so ago I stopped by the club to see another girl I was banging. I had never seen her dance and thought it would be fun. It was fun, we had a great time talking about the club and other dancers too. In fact we discussed which ones we might like to have join us for a three-way! I even took her to VIP for a few dances. But I didn't stay long and a little while later she joined me in my room for an overnight visit.
As for truly dating a stripper, I seriously doubt I would ever do that.
SJG
I had a bit of a run-in w/ an unbeknownst to me stripper-BF.
It was a Miami small black super-dive - no-cover ever - no door person or any bouncers/security, usually just 2-employees, the bartender (usually an older ex-dancer) and the dance-counter/"manager" (since dancers have to give a $3-cut of each $10 dance).
Was getting-dances w/ a brickhouse ebony bar-side - a dark-skinned mid to late 20s AA guy stands on the other side of her leaning against the bar while she's dancing for me - the guy says something to her which I did not understand/hear (she was in b/w us), then all of a sudden he grabs her by the arm and pulls her real-hard towards the floor - w/o thinking about it (reflex reaction) I jump out of my seat and slap his arm away - I had no idea who he was and thought it was just some random custy assaulting her (or a jealous reg or w/e) - I stand in front of my dancer and the dude is yapping away at my face - I remain calm but ready to defend myself (especially since he was about my-size so I wasn't intimidated and kinda pissed at what he did and barging in on my dances that I'm paying for; again I am not aware it's her man) - the manager/dance-counter comes running over and gets b/w me and the douche and says to my dancer "Mocha control your man", and that's when it crossed my mind it was her BF which a few-seconds later I confirmed w/ her - anyway the dude was asked to leave the club and Mocha kept dancing for me making her $$$, LOL - the dude seemed to be drunk and I guess he'd been there a while getting drunk.
Def not a good idea for me to get involved, but again it was kinda a reflex-reaction that happened out-of-the-blue completely unexpected and at the moment it all came across as some random dude assaulting a dancer that was dancing for me.