Strip club bizarro world ITC and OTC problem

27 comments

• shailynn

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  7 years ago

  Just meet her in a hotel - fuck - and leave.
  
  Don't do other activities with her that make you think she's your girlfriend.
  
  If you want to go to the extreme maybe you should stop kissing her as well.
  
  Just fuck her in the pussy, throw the rubber at her when you're done and show her the door.
  
  That may be a bit extreme but you get the idea.
• Papi_Chulo

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  7 years ago

  Masturbate more often so you won't be so hard-up all the time
• Papi_Chulo

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  7 years ago

  Get laid by other chicks so your OTC-bitch doesn't feel like the only-bitch in the world
• warhawks

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  7 years ago

  Papi saving us a lot of money...
• rickdugan

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  7 years ago

  Stop using her as a relationship substitute. By that I mean spread your mongering efforts out. Maybe even do some civvie dating if you can. You will go broke trying to chase stripper affections and end up with nothing to show for it.
• Papi_Chulo

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  7 years ago

  "... you will go broke trying to chase stripper affections ..."
  
  And often emotionally fucked-up
• georgmicrodong

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  7 years ago

  @DrunkPraetorian: "Any advice or tips or things to always keep in mind/say to oneself to not fall for a dancer?"
  
  Probabaly not the best guy to answer this, given my history, but acknowledging that you have a problem is the first step in fixing it.
  
  If you're starting to feel like you're getting too close, back off. See other girls. Stop seeing her.
• MrDeuce

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  7 years ago

  I fell hard for my ATF last year and thought about her *every* day, even (or especially) when we were on a 3-month "break". As a matter of fact, after a resumption of our OTC "dates" early this year (because she needed money, of course), we are now on another multi-month break and I *still* think about her every day. I guess my best advice is to enjoy the ride, and the fantasy if that's part of it, but always keep in mind that it's not real, that you are just an ATM to her, and that it will eventually end, probably badly. And for God's sake, don't lend or advance her any money!
  
  Lesson learned (I think).
  
• DrunkPraetorian

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  7 years ago

  Thanks all. I feel that even if I tell her I need a break, or even if I cut all ties, it still won't help me and I'll still be stuck thinking about her. I just feel like I'm too deep in already with the OTC stuff, dates, rides, dances...I just have to keep telling myself the main points that it's not real and she's just after the money and it's just an act she's putting on
• K

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  7 years ago

  Variety. Rotate your sessions among several ladies.
• warhawks

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  7 years ago

  I rotated my sessions, but I always went back to my ATF.
  
  Rotating only works if you don't get feelings for the girl OTC.
  
  It's a trap I fell into. Save yourself a ton of money and heart ache. Don't do it.
• JohnSmith69

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  7 years ago

  It pains me greatly to say this. But I agree with Rick Dugan.
• Dominic77

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  7 years ago

  This might help. The dancer's body language often betrays or disagrees with what the dancer is saying. Sure she says she's into him, but if he looks at the subtle cues, it's not exactly true. I noticed that the first time I was in a club at 18. There was a certain cognitive dissonance about it. I think some customers ignore that in order to believe the fantasy is true.
• wildbourbon

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  7 years ago

  There's solid advice in the above posts. If you haven't moved to the point where she's giving you time for free, it's not any type of "relationship". If it's really messing with your life enough to keep you from socializing with civvies and you're obsessing over it, treat it like a real breakup and walk away. In short order you'll heal and move on to others, IMO.
• Papi_Chulo

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  7 years ago

  Don't worry - we can help you - we're gonna book you on Dr Phil
• joc13

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  7 years ago

  I just re-read most of her texts and that resets me for a couple of days until I see her again.
  
  Luckily, she is not using all the tricks in the stripper handbook on me, cause I'd probably fall for it.
• Dominic77

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  7 years ago

  Women are rich with nonverbal communication. Learn to read them. It's too late for Larryfishsticks (he'll die a 15 y/o virgin) but it's probably not too late for the OP. Once you see that it's like stripper vaccination or stripper-cillin.
  
  True story.
• MrDeuce

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  7 years ago

  Dominic77, I would be curious to hear about these nonverbal cues that indicate that a dancer is not as into me as I thought. My ATF stripper had me totally fooled for months into thinking that I was also her ATF customer, and it was a hard lesson to learn that I was only one of many. I thought I could read people, especially strippers (because I've played with so many for 20+ years), and I spent something like 150 hours with this chick, but it appears that she had me completely fooled.
• jackslash

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  7 years ago

  Women know they can fool men easily.
• DrunkPraetorian

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  7 years ago

  Yeah I found out real fast and she even told me that I wasn't the only customer she had. About the nonverbal cues, the thing ive learned is that when she's not working and I text her she's a completely different person, short quick answers, doesn't show interest..it's like she gets into a different zone when she's going to work. That's how I also figured out I was just another customer, I just have to not let it affect me and block it out
• RandomMember

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  7 years ago

  "How do I stop catching the "feels" for a girl? "
  ---------------------------
  
  My advice is to read everything that @Smith has ever posted and do exactly the opposite. Paid relationships are not real, folks!
• RandomMember

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  7 years ago

  I think men are excused from falling for a stripper the first time. After that, if you can't learn from the experience, you need to get therapy.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  Just scroll down to the article about the system read it and remember the ones running the system are the ones with vaginas they are the real deal. You don't own anything and you only get to keep what they don't want.
• HungryGiraffe

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  7 years ago

  As a PL that falls in lust very easily, I can relate. I think others have given great advice because we've all been there. We naturally build emotional bonds with the chicks we pay for sex. Bonding is one of the purposes of sex.
  
  My two cents would be to "guard your heart" by making sure you are engaged in other activities that provide a well-rounded life. Don't neglect civilian friends and other avocations and hobbies. Make sure you're moving forward with expanding your knowledge and expertise in your work field. Moving up and making more cash builds confidence and life satisfaction.
• DrunkPraetorian

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  7 years ago

  Update - help. She texted me after our last date saying she felt I was getting too romantic with her and forgetting it's just entertainment..she didn't seem happy but I asked to give me a second chance and she gave me like a "maybe". I think I've got it kind of under control but now I'm thinking what's the point? I'll just do OTC again and might screw myself up. It's so hard to just cut it out and go cold turkey, I don't know if I'll hear from her again. Should I send another text or no? She still has kept me on her social media so I'm not sure if she's cut me off yet
• ppwh

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  7 years ago

  I have cut girls off for this same reason when they started getting way too ahead of themselves in our "relationship" I started seeing them again if they seemed to calm down, but that state never tended to last all that long.
  
  If you can find it in yourself to chill the fuck out and enjoy her company without picking out colors for bridesmaid's dresses, do that. If that is simply not going to happen for you, she has told you her position on the matter. In that case, you can move on and find someone else to RIL over who might even be less scrupulous in romancing your wallet, leading to greater levels of excitement. :D
• DrunkPraetorian

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  7 years ago

  Okay...I just don't know if I've wrecked this enough or not. Or if I should just wait for her to text me again hopefully, or if I should take a week or two off and then go in the club to see her