Customers that stink

avatar for K
K
New Jersey
At the nude clubs I frequent there are always a few customers with very bad odor problems. This past weekend I had a rare Saturday I wasn't working so to the club I went.
One guy stank so bad I moved when he sat down next to me at the stage. As one of the dancers left the stage the next one brought a can of Lysol with her and sprayed the guy. He got up and walked to the outer bar with her spraying the entire time he was in range. I assume he knows he stinks as he said nothing and did not appear surprised. I damn near pissed myself from laughing. I tipped her well for that.

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avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
8 years ago
:)
avatar for gawker
gawker
8 years ago
There used to be a pretty regular customer at my favorite club who would pay $1000 for a blowjob. He was grossly obese and according to the dancers, "Fat Kevin" would smell like shit when he pulled his dick out. He was a pleasant soul who didn't last long once his dick was in her mouth and the money was great. One dancer told me she held her breath for a full two minutes while sucking him off. Lots of laughs at his expense.
avatar for TeoTommy
TeoTommy
8 years ago
I would have tipped the Lysol dancer a $20.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
8 years ago
Is that why she was spraying me?
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
Don't recall having ran into this problem - maybe up north when it's cold some people don't wanna take showers
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
Or they may think all the layers of clothing due to cold weather may hide their stink
avatar for K
K
8 years ago
Papi
The dancers say there are two groups that generally stink. Indians and guys with serious emotional problems. This dancers in this club can't decline a dance. I think guys that can't get a lap dance somewhere else come here knowing that.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
8 years ago
I heard about some people not taking a shower for several days. I'm sure they stink. I've accidentally smelled some stinky people from over 50 feet away when the wind blew the wrong direction.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
8 years ago
I've had to move seats a few times when a guy with rancid nose hair melting BO would plop himself downwind of me. To no one's surprise not one of the stinkers was ever approached by a dancer.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
8 years ago
I hate it when a nice looking dancer stinks and she doesn't seem to know it. I remember some nights when a dancer came over and said no one seems to want a dance tonight. I knew why right away.
avatar for AnonymousJim
AnonymousJim
8 years ago
I feel like smelling nice is one of the easiest ways a guy can get better service. Just keep a can of body spray in the car. Believe me, women notice things like smell better than guys do, and just that little act of making yourself smell good will make her turn her contact level up a notch.

As for dancers, to be honest, the best smell they can have is no smell. Yes, we've all encountered dancers with either a stanky ass or the smell of cigarette or weed, but to be honest, it's almost worse when a dancer has a bunch of perfume on. Yes, it smells better -- until she rubs it all over you and you have to explain why you smell like you do to your wife the next morning.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
8 years ago
Borrow desertscrub's power washer and do the offendee next time you see it in the club.
avatar for Duke69
Duke69
8 years ago
Dammit K i didnt know you were in the club that day. She sprayed me good
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
8 years ago
@anonymousjim

as long as it's not too much, I love when dancers wear perfume. The rest I agree with, tho
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
8 years ago
You see a lot of guys coming in at 5PM straight from their ditch digging job. I'm sure they smell just like the ditches.
avatar for NinaBambina
NinaBambina
8 years ago
Yes Flagooner that's why she was spraying you.
avatar for NinaBambina
NinaBambina
8 years ago
I actually don't really dance for guys who smell very bad, or I'll give them sort of an airdance. I don't want their odor to rub off on me, because typically a dance with nice contact. There was one guy who smelled so horribly and immediately asked for a dance on a Lions game day ($$$). I had to stand up halfway through and give an airdance, then made up an excuse as to why we could not continue. I'm not gonna start my shift off stinking, especially a game day. Fuck no.
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
8 years ago
I agree the best smell a dancer can have is no smell. It's sexy when she's on you in a lap dance and has great smelling hair, tho'. But whether you're just starting your night at the club or stopping in briefly before last call, no man wants to leave covered in body glitter and smelling like Macys make-up department.
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
8 years ago
"no man wants to leave covered in body glitter and smelling like Macys make-up department."

speak for yourself.

i love still being able to smell my CF's body spray on my sweatshirt 2 days after we've done a 15 minute VIP

it reminds me of her :-)
avatar for larryfisherman
larryfisherman
8 years ago
GoVikings is in love lol.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
8 years ago
GoV is becoming a RIL

:)
avatar for DoctorPhil
DoctorPhil
8 years ago
customers who stink. you hear that zipperhead. nobody wants your 4got2wipe shit covered wiener dog self anywhere near them
avatar for JimGassagain
JimGassagain
8 years ago
I remember when SJG wrote that a bouncer told him he had an odor problem as he entered a club. LOL!!

That's funny, I don't care who you are!
avatar for Estafador
Estafador
8 years ago
Well maybe vape smells isn't that potent but I vape hella bud so either women don't care or love the smell
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
8 years ago
I try not to get close enough to other customers for their BO to matter. When dancers start complaining about other customers I try not to encourage it. If there's something wrong with a customer, I don't need to know about it.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
8 years ago
I do enjoy a vanilla scent or perfume on som dancers.

If dancers smell good, that is fine with me because their scents rub off. I go into the clubs without any smell most of the time but occasionally I've heard dancers say I smell good. I think they might be smelling a combo scent.
It's possible I have some natural scent. I remember one night a dancer said I smelled good and then she licked my arm and said I tasted good too. I don't meet dancers every night that start licking me. I take that as a sign she might be a bit oral. :)
I once wasn't happy when dancers started licking me in my ear or on my arm or somewhere else until I found out it's a sign that she must be hungry. I'm ok as long as she doesnt start biting me like I'm chicken.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
8 years ago
There's a guy here that has a BO problem, as well as halitosis. He's just rank. He doesn't seem to mind the girls not approaching him, though. I've seen him in a club for a couple hours at a time, with a lot of empty space around him.
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