tuscl

Nympho Activation System

gammanu95
My casual drinking is your alcohol poisoning.
There really is a specific phrase you can say to any woman, any where, at any time which will trigger all her hormones and make her undeniably horny. It's no guarantee that she's going to drop her panties and hump you on the spot, but she's going to do something to burn off all the sexual energy created by saying the following.
So next time you're at a bar, in a coffee shop, on a dinner date, talking to the really hot chick in accounting, or trying to create that new CF, look her in the eye and repeat the following:
I AM
SOFA KING
WE TODD DID
Repeat as loud as necessary, louder each time you say it, until the desired results are achieved.
Let us know how it works for you

18 comments

  • jackslash
    •
    7 years ago
    This was Alucard's SYSTEM.
  • rockstar666
    •
    7 years ago
    Nothing gets a dancer hornier than money. The more you have, the wetter she gets.
  • Hugh_G_Rection
    •
    7 years ago
    I love the satire, Gammanu.

    In honesty? I've read enough PUA bullshit on the internet to realize that their shit is basically out there to convince beta males they are alpha males if they fork out $39.95 (or whatever the pricetag in their hustle is) and do the equivalent of wearing a bra on your head while chanting some silly incantation as seen in the old teen coming of age flick "Weird Science"

    At least the geeks in that movie summoned up their video hottie who told them what they really needed was to be themselves. Being authentic- priceless. Screw the Neuro Linguistic Programing BS, I ain't drinking that Kool-Aid.
  • Ermita_Nights
    •
    7 years ago
    For those of you who are missing the joke, say this out loud a few times. I won't spoil it just yet.
  • shadowcat
    •
    7 years ago
    I lose out on all of that priceless information because I don'e have any TV service.
  • wallanon
    •
    7 years ago
    Careful. You might end up with a girlfriend using that technique.
  • RandomMember
    •
    7 years ago
    @GammaNut is such a funny, original, thinker

    http://www.roadkilltshirts.com/I-AM-SOFA…
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    7 years ago
    Somebody post what it is supposed to sound like you are saying. I'm horrible at figuring out that kind of shit.
  • vincemichaels
    •
    7 years ago
    It worked!!!

    I told the police chief here to say it to txtittyfag. Tx dropped to his knees and sucked off the cop. LMAO
  • crazyjoe
    •
    7 years ago
    This is smarts
  • Dominic77
    •
    7 years ago
    See. This is the strip club advise we younger guys used to get from older guys before Tuscl. Classic.
  • Mate27
    •
    7 years ago
    HughGRectum again shows us why his ass is tighter than a bulls ass in fly season. He's got no sense of humor.

    Who the fuck has never heard of the Sofa King joke before? Do you live under a rock?
  • anonlvone
    •
    7 years ago
    I am so fucking retarded. lol
  • Stephanie4life
    •
    7 years ago
    I was sitting next to this super hot chick at the bus stop and tried it. She acted like she was ignoring me so I started slapping myself in the head to get her attention. She got so hot she had to run away.
  • gammanu95
    •
    7 years ago
    It's a classic. I still remember when I saw it first in an email chain back in college. Email was fairly new, having a personal laptop was a luxury, so most of us broke college students used a communal computer lab of a hundred or so machines. I was able to read it in my head before reading it out loud, and I probably already heard the sofa king gags already. But for days, there were students in the computer lab just repeating "I am sofaking wetoddid" over and over. It was funny as hell.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    7 years ago
    gammanu, how am I going to be able to earn a living when you're broadcasting my only product for free?

    SJG
  • sharkhunter
    •
    7 years ago
    Say it like this. Keep repeating faster until you get it.

    Eye am sofa king re tod did

  • Mainster
    •
    7 years ago
    I AM.
    WARREN BUFFET.
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