Where did I fuck up?
larryfisherman
California
Looking back, there were 3 strippers that stick out in my mind that I wouldn't have minded being fuckbuddies with or dating them, but it didn't work out aka they rejected me.
I'd like your opinion on what I did wrong.
All three of them said I was cute. It could be SS, but I keep myself in shape, I'm young, and I'm not bad looking, so I don't know. I had developed good conversation with all of them, pretty much talk about anything. With the lapdances it started ok, but it got better and better. Eventually I was sucking tits and sucking ass (I'm thinking this is where I fucked up), I didn't try for FIV or DATY or anything like that. So after a few different visits with really good lapdances, I asked them out. All three of them kind of blew me off.
There's a few different scenarios which could have led to this IMO
1. I treated them like a object in the lapdances, they don't mind since I'm paying them, but that automatically crossed me off as boyfriend material in their eyes.
2. I spent too much on them ITC, now they just see me as a ITC regular/ATM (although some people on TUSCL said they were regulars of their favorite dancers before they ended up dating them/FWB)
3. I go to the strip club too much for their liking. I would be in there once a week.
4. They are all about the money. They wouldn't have minded fucking me OTC, but they wanted to be paid for it.
5. Similar to 4. Them letting me suck their tits, kiss their ass during lapdances meant they were paid providers ITC and OTC.
6. They lied to me (shock!). They weren't into me, they were just interested in my money, they said whatever I wanted to hear.
7. Other?
What do you think?
I know I'm over analyzing this shit to death, but the time away from the strip clubs makes me reflect on things.
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Definitely #4.
#4
And...
#6
Now, with this knowledge, go forth and be the shark and not the guppie.
Strippers are generally very attractive women, so they likely have no shortage of guys wanting to be with them. In other words, you have lots of competition
But also, if a girl dances in a strip club, she gets lots of attention and she will know that most of it will go no where.
So did you give them your contact info? I did that and the girl who told me, "I don't go out with customers", left a message on my answering machine the next night. This was my first experience with trying to get personal with dancers, back when I was about your age.
You kind of have to extend yourself and be willing to take it on the chin, and then often the girl will come around.
Contact info, come back to the club for a second visit, focus on just one girl.
Otherwise, if there girls are fairly hard core and used to P4P, they probably will make that clear.
Good Luck,
SJG
SJG
Find a different mentor, @Fishstix.
But most strippers do have BF's, at least many of them do, of a sort.
SJG
@warhawks- well said!
@jestritetheguru and @houjack- good insight, thanks.
Well you fucked up along time ago when you created your account pussy boy
The best part of Larry fish sticks is running down his moms leg LMFAO
@JS69-I wasn't looking for a girlfriend, but I certainly wouldn't have minded being fuckbuddies with those girls.
A few other alternative explanations are:
1. You aren't as good looking as you think;
2. You started to creep them out; and/or
3. You don't make enough money for them to be interested (you ARE in LA after all).
All joking aside, if you are young and in shape then you shouldn't be looking for love in strip clubs anyway. I can tell you that when I was young and single, I went to clubs only sporadically as I was having too much fun cycling through normal girls. Heavy duty strip club attendance is for us saddled down and/or older types, not for a guy who can be doing all sorts of fun things elsewhere. So saddle up, learn some non-creepy social skills and get on out there already. ;)
No you ever try to date/hook up with girls outside of strip clubs? If you can get lots of girls that way you can probably score with strippers too. If not you won't with strippers either.
So chances are, you didn't strike out; you were never even up to bat. I suppose for enough money you have some luck...but that seems about the most PL ish thing a PL can do!
You've talked about taking girls to baseball games. Maybe these girls don't want to do stuff like that.
I say to always treat them as civilians. But it may be that all these girls are interested in is fucking, and for money. So if they steer it that way, like a brief meeting as soon as they get off, or the next day or something, a time constrained 'session', then you probably have got to do it their way.
SJG
@Dougster-I had a civilian GF for 10 years, (pretty much all of my sexual active life) during that time I never fucked another girl. When we broke it off a little over a year ago it was hard for me to get civilian girls. It's almost like I didn't have experience going after girls, I was locked down in a relationship for so long. Since then I've dated one stripper briefly, had a fuckbuddy relationship with a stripper, and dated a civilian briefly. I've had a rough stretch with no pussy recently.
The reason it did not work out was because you did not know EXACTLY what you wanted them for. If you do not KNOW what you want her for then there is 0% chance that you will get it! You cannot be simultaneously dead and alive (unlike Schroedingers cat) and in the same way, you cannot simultaneously be fuckbuddies and boyfriend/girlfriend. So it was your own indecision that prevented you from getting what you want, in the same way that you will not get what you want in a restaurant if you tell your waitress that you can't decide what food you want.
SJG