Questions??? Answered honestly by a stripper

How can you tell that a customer will be a good long term customer?

What kind of customer might be good OTC material (if you did OTC type of stuff)?

What is the maybe the worst thing another dancer can do to you? Steal your money? Steal your most loyal PL? Cause fights?

When is it time to change clubs? Would you change clubs just to make things more interesting?

Do you see a time where you wouldn't be dancing? What would that look like? In a committed relationship? Different career? Different city?

How do you choose which customers to approach? A lot of dancers will ask every customer in the club for a dance, and others will zero in on a few customers and never approach the vast majority in the club.

How far will you go to retain a customer? Would you pretend its more than business?

How common is sexual harassment on the job (ie dancer receives from manager, bouncer, etc.)? Are the chains like Deja Vu and Rick's more professional and it's the small independents a dancer can receive more harassment at, or vice-versa?

Are fines levied by a club done so to primarily drive off unwanted gals? Anotherwords, are the accumulated fines overlooked until a club decides they no longer want the gal? Where does the fine money go, assuming it's paid to management? Is it divided up among the staff, or put into the petty cash fund for a rainy day, goes to Jerry's kids?

If a guy is getting cheated (dancer miscounts the number of dances to her advantage as an example), what's the most effective means to stop the ripoff in it's tracks? What's the most creative you've heard of? What's the least effective method to stop the ripoff?

What's the best business driver (gimmick?) for a club or dancer you've heard of?

So we customers learn from the mistakes of our bretheren, what's the worst 'game' you've had to suffer through? (As in this guy's got worse than no game...) Looking for a good anecdote or two on this one!

Did a guy ever say something which made you weak at the knees? If so, would you mind divulging it?

Got to bring up tourists: What nationality is the best to dance for (and why), and what nationality was most often a nightmare (and why)?

Thanks!

I am a big spender but not a regular at any one club (bar one in Calgary). How can I discreetly let this be known to hot dancers when I am on the prowl in a new club? Flashing gobs of cash is never a good idea anywhere but especially not in SCs. My preference is for the dancers to get the majority of my night's spending. I hate lining a bouncer's pocket or a manager's pocket to get the attention of the club's star dancers.

@looney larry-

-You can never tell if a customer will be a long term customer and can only hope he will be a good one. I've had lots of regular customers over the years and I'd have to say my favorites are the ones who understand my position as a dancer (time is money when we are inside the club). For example, if they show up on a busy Saturday night (unannounced) it's nice if they let me work and don't expcet me to sit with them until they are ready for dances. In return I will usually come in on a weekday or a day shift and spend the whole time with them. Also it's a plus if they don't ask me about my love life outside of work. I hate to lie to good customers so it's best if those things are just not brought up.

-I"m assuming you mean OTC extras but I have never done that kinda stuff (and honestly, never found the need to). However, I have gone on lots of dates with customers. Most customers I've gone on dates with just like to be seen in public with a pretty girl on their arm and like the attention and interest i show in them. I've gotten some insane gifts this way.

-Dancers can be pretty shady. I'm never too concerned with girls stealing money or customers but I hate it when jealous girls tell customers things that are untrue (like I have kids or am married or something). The worst thing I saw a dancer do once was steal a girl's outfit from her locker, pee all over it, and then stick it back in her locker. Gross!

-I stopped working at a club that I was at for 4 years after they kept pressuring me to sign new contracts giving up my rights to sue, etc. Believe it or not, strippers actually sign contracts and fill out lots of paper work at each club. Each county has a huge rule book that we are supposed to know inside and out and at one club I had to pass a quiz just to work their.

-I don't know what will make me stop dancing for good. Relationships don't make a difference to me because my old boyfriends have all been okay with it. I would definitely stop if I had kids. Stripping is actually the reason I was able to get my degree and my masters... but I don't want to start my career yet because I make such good money right now. I would probably stop dancing and find another job if I got a bad injury or if I lost my looks.

@rl27

After doing this for some time now, I can pretty much judge who is going to spend money and who is not. Sometimes I am surprised by a hidden jem but most of the time my instincts are dead on. I people watch a lot and carefully choose who I approach and when. I hate it when girls are desperate and go from table to table. I NEVER do that! I always make a mental note of customers who check me out on stage or when I'm walking by and hit them up strategically.

My best technique is to go up to a table that might be interested and position myslef so that when I'm talking to the table my ass is conveniently (and innocently) bent over in front of some other table that might be interested. And if the first table doesn't get a dance, then i go straight past the next table and stand somewhere, alone, looking approachable. Most of the time someone from that second table will approach me within minutes. My best advice, go get the girl you want. Don't wait for her to come to you. I can't tell you how many times I hear, "I was waiting for you all night" when it's 5 minutes until close.

@Irish

-Short answer... not very far. There are so many fish in the sea that I'm never willing to cheapen myself or go further than I'm comfortable with. That being said, I have never had sex for money (shocking, I know! not all strippers have sex with customers).

-I wouldn't be a good stripper if my customers didn't think I was into them. Sometimes I'm so good at it I even fool myself! However, I never purposely mislead them or make them think I mean something more. In fact, soliciting anything OTC is illegal and you can get totally busted if they are Vice cops. I was working in a club that got raided once and have been super careful ever since.

1. When are you gonna post some pictures of yourself?

2. When are you coming to Louisville?

;)

what are your thoughts on dancing for us female customers?

Thanks for your answers, Heidi. I hope that I was of some help. I'll try to think of more questions. There are many customers out there that wouldn't mind talking about your job and how you manage to do what you do. Time is money, we know, but there are hundreds of men who crave more than the superficial.

It is a bad analogy, but I suppose there are numerous people who would welcome the opportunity to sit down with a professional magician, just to ask them questions about their job, maybe some inside tricks, maybe a glimpse from their perspective. On the other hand, maybe it is not such a bad analogy, since they both rely on an element of deception, and the illusion only works because the audience wants to believe in it.

I have a background in sociology and I am familiar with "deviant" behavior. And that would apply to both dancers and customers. Just because I might not engage in the full range of deviant behaviors (maybe just slivers of it), doesn't mean that I'm still not fascinated by it, why people do it. Strip clubs are such rich artificial places with their own mores, rules, codes, and practices. It is an environment that sprung up to fill a void. Is it a fundamental urge that men need to be visually stimulated and females need to display? If so, it has merely been commercialized.

I liked your admission that you wouldn't be a good stripper if your customers didn't think you were into them. And so much of that is the subtle, nuanced things: eye-to-eye contact, fingertip touches, breathing on the neck, locking on to a customer from across the room, a confident and flirty demeanor. All of those things are much more important than a blatant display of skin.

Interesting that you have had several dates with customers. There are numerous vets on here that ridicule any customers that would seek any OTC dates without sex. Yet, here you are. I suppose that they would see the guys as getting played and that the gifts were delusional mistakes. Maybe so, but maybe that was exactly the type of interaction they were seeking. Where would you draw the line? A weekend getaway to Vegas? A weekend getaway to Mexico? A trip to Europe? At some point the guy will probably entertain some ideas of getting you in bed as part of that package.

I like your thoughtful writings. Wish you the best.

Hi Heidi,

I'm looking to start dancing soon! In fact, I am doing an amateur night on Thursday yay! Any advice about the business, amateur night or other?

@CTQWERTY

-I've worked at both big and small clubs and found that sexual harassment is pretty much part of the game. I have found that a playful attitude about it gets you much further and keeps you sane. It's somewhat hypocritical when you try to tell your manager, "hey, I"d appreciate it if you don't touch me" when he watches you get touched and grind on customers all night. However, it really does depend on the individual. I've had some good managers and some sleazy ones. I used to work at SRhino in Vegas and had no problems... but when I auditioned at the one in Torrance the manager actually asked if he could feel my breasts because he didn't believe they were real! I let him (it was the quick squeeze I had hoped for), he hired me, and then I never went back there.

Bouncers I've found to be much worse than the managers when it comes to harassment. This is probably because they routinely sleep with dancers (even I am guilty of this). They are the ones who are watching our dances and see what we put up with and think it's okay with us if they do the same.

-Each club is different when it comes to fines. I worked at a club that would charge you and extra $10 if you were even a minute late for your shift and an additional $10 if you wanted to leave early (that's on top of a $50 stage fee). Since you pay these fees, in cash, directly to the manager, and get no receipt, I can only imagine they go directly into their pockets.

-Many girls can be very cleaver when it comes to ripping guys off. There was a dancer who used to literally pull guys out of their seats by their arm, drag them back to the LDchairs, do dance after dance after dance (without telling them when one ends and the next begins), and then charge them for one or two more than she actually did. She used to get written up all the time for this but it never stopped her and she never got fired. This was her M.O. and let me tell you, she MADE BANK!!!

The only remedy for this is to discuss it with the dancer. Ask her what the policy is. Some clubs count dances so if you are in the LDchair the dancer has to pay a percentage even if you are just sitting there talking. A good dancer will let you know when the song is over and if you'd like another one. If she doesn't do that, tell her you only have enough $ for ___ dances and she's guaranteed to stop after that amount. Unfortunately, if you get ripped off, your best option is to pay up, learn your lesson, and get the hell outta there. Don't expect the bouncers to be on your side either.

• I've heard about every pick up line imaginable. The stupidest was this customer who told me he couldn't believe how beautiful I was and said I had to be from outer space. The rest of the night he kept calling me his alien hunny. Seriously!

-No, nothing that anyone has ever said ITC has ever made me melt. However, little things like remembering what drink I like or bringing me little gifts certainly score points. My advice in trying to pick a dancer up is to be yourself, be courteous, don't be intoxicated, and tip, tip, tip. I know men don't want to hear that but you have to remember that every song that goes by without dancing is a missed opportunity for her. The more you tip her, the more at ease she will be and the more time you will be able to spend with her. But keep in mind- women, in general, know if they are going to sleep with you or not within the first couple minutes. There is really nothing you can say that's going to change that. If you have to spit game then you will probably have to pay too.

-Best to dance for- 40something, married, whited guys because they need a sexual outlet and you're giving them what they want without nagging them or lesbians because you never have to grind on their hard-on and they ALWAYS tip... well!

-Worst to dance for- Arab guys. Without question! They usually have some form of body odor, smelly, scratchy beards, are the most grabby, always want a kiss (french), and treat women with complete disrespect. They always try to make you feel like you didn't satisfy them and rarely tip.

@farmerart

-I agree that you shouldn't waste your money on the bouncers or managers. Even if you go to a new club and tell them you want a tall blonde with big tits, they might send a girl over that you are not attracted to and then she is going to expect something and probably sit with you longer than you want. I would say sit it out, observe or meet all of the girls, and then make a decision based on your preference. Once you find her, tip her big right off the bat and don't waste her time or else she might move on. Also, don't ever tell a dancer that you have a lot of money that you want to spend on her. The reason being, you have no idea how spoiled this girl has been and your idea of "a lot" is probably $1000 short of her idea of "a lot".

@georgemicrodong

-I'm not posting pictures because 1.) I prefer to remain anonymous and 2.) I have another job that would be in jeopardy if anyone found out I do this

-I don't plan on leaving CA anytime soon but if you are out here, send me a message and I will let you know where I am working and my schedule.

:)

@lopaw

-I have mixed feelings about female customers. I've danced for hundreds of females over the years, some expereinces good, some bad, some ugly. Overall, I have to say I still prefer men. They are just easier to please. I can't really put female customers all into one category because women are complex and everyone comes to a SC for different reasons but I"ll try to break it down into some general categories:

Lesbians- love 'em! They tip big, they compliment you, they are less devious than the male customers, and they don't care if you're not into women as long as you give them a sexy, sensual dance, and maintain lots of eye contact.

Young couples- meh, I'll pass. Unfortunately for me, I always tend to be the one that they pick. The reason I don't like this "type" is because it's always an act. They are usually drunk and rowdy and the girl is simply going along with it to fulfill some fantasy her boyfriend/date has (she thinks he will like her more if she's fun at SC's). Without fail, the girl always tries to touch, moves around WAY TOO MUCH, moans, and I usually end up seeing more of her than I want. Plus, she's judging me the whole time while telling me how beautiful I am. It's always awkward when she wants me to then dance for him because I have to give him a mediocre dance because we both know he's not allowed to like it too much. Despite all of this, I'm totally smiley and happy and give lots of hugs and compliments and they always leave satisfied. Like I said, It's all an act. This type usually tips well but rarely get more than a 2 dances.

Older married couples- They can be fun but if I have another dance lined up I'll chose that instead. This "type" is all about the wife while the husband watches. I have to give her all the attention and change my style to be more sensitive and provacative (no shoving my tits in her face or grinding on her crotch). They usually get several dances in a row and always ends with an invite back to their bed. Lol, no thanks.

Groups of straight women(bachelorette parties, etc)- Ugh! The worst! Please stay at home! They are called gentleman's clubs for a reason. While I'm sure they have fun, there is no doubt that they are just taking up space and disrupting the vibe. These groups are sexed-up and on the prowl. They never waste $ on silly lap dances and expect the dancers to do ridiculous monkey tricks on the pole for a measly dollar.

HottieHeidi:

Thanks for your reply. Your reply didn't really satisfy me. I should have been more specific in the details of my question.

e.g. How big a tip to get the dancer's attention - one franklin, five, ten?

When is too much cash TOO MUCH?

When do I give the tip - when the dancer is on stage or surreptitiously, when she leaves the stage?

Are dancers freaked out by aggressive guys like me?

Is a roving traveler like me dismissed automatically by dancers?

Should I tip for conversation to get the ball rolling?

When a dancer realizes she is dealing with a serious player does she get intimidated?

Is it better for a guy like me to play dumb and rich to give her the idea that I can be "played"?

Or to be myself?

Thanks for your responses, Heidi! I'm sure this thread has taken a fair amount of time and effort on your part. I think Founder should reward you and mxoxo with extra free months for your writings. BUT, in order to make sure the efforts you & she have produced don't fall by the wayside (due to newer posts), I'm going to ask Founder to create a new tab at the top of the site called "SPOV" or "DPOV", for Stripper Point of View or Dancer Point of View. There, only acclaimed works by dancers will be moved so they will be much easier to find & the section will remain largely crap free. Let's see whether Founder is on board... I'll post this idea in the Discussion section as well to see what the membership thinks. Again, thanks for your efforts! CT

Heidi: My questions were frivolous, but thanks for answering anyway. Just FYI, I won't complain if there's no head or face in the pictures. In the meantime, I'll just assume a cross between Heather Locklear and Cameron Diaz. How's that work for you? :))

As for the other, I probably won't be leaving my comfortable little den of iniquity anytime soon, or for very long, but if I do, I'll warn you before I come, so you can take off work that day and hide.

"this customer who told me he couldn't believe how beautiful I was and said I had to be from outer space."

Hey, HottieHeidi has met sharkhunter!

Hey, Lyric, welcome aboard. I know you wanted to hear from Heidi, but I can tell you a few things from the customer's point of view. Usually, amateur night is not a good night for guys that visit this site. It is mostly a waste of our time. There are some bad clubs and bad amateurs out there and often the clubs like to milk it so that the amateur night stuff takes up way too much time. If you want to win the prize or get a job dancing there or whatever, you need to distinguish yourself from the rest of the pack. If it is a line-up or cattle call, you need to look different than the other girls.

Accentuate your assets. If you are flat, then gloves, garters, chokers, and the like help to draw the eye to your entire package. If you have a slamming ass, then the thong will show it off. And don't be afraid to be a little classy. Costume jewelry, fake pearl strands, or long earrings with sparklies are a good touch. Think flirty and not trampy. If your competition just got off the back of a Harley, you might want to look uptown.

The dancing does not have to be all high energy and gymnastics. Pole tricks can come later. Sensuous, sultry, flowing, and graceful are best. If you have had any classical dance training at all, remember how to use it. Use your eyes more than your boobs. Develop the attitude that each guy in there would give their right nut to be with you, but only you choose which one, if any, will be graced with your presence. Not bitchy, just exclusive. You are selling an illusion and attitude is everything. I have seen the plainest, mousiest, most nondescript girls ooze sensuality from the stage. Good luck.

Thanks Hidi :-)

How often (if ever) do you experience sexual arousal or maybe even orgasm from private interactions with customers?