Why Strippers are like Cats

avatar for Imamutt
Imamutt
They come and go as they please. Completely apathetic toward you until they want something. They act like they did you a favor if they barf on you. But it's pretty cool when they purr and lick you.

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avatar for jackslash
jackslash
8 years ago
I'm beginning to wonder, was my cat a stripper in a previous life?

The evidence:

1. She is beautiful and graceful
2. She sits in my lap without being invited
3. She thinks only of her own comfort
4. She is totally selfish and self-centered
5. She ignores me when I want to play with her
6. She always does exactly as she pleases
7. If she gets angry, her claws come out
8. She acts affectionate and rubs against me only when she wants food
9. Her name is Exxtasy


I would get rid of this ungrateful cat, but I need a little pussy.
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
8 years ago
ha!
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
8 years ago
Describes my ATF perfectly. Ran into her last night and since I only do dances with her 20% of the time or less now, our "relationship" is different. Pleasant time at the bar, Close enough contact there so I was able to ask and confirm she stopped working out a month ago. Friendly, nice, whatever. I tell her I am going to go get high in my car, then we can go have fun. It was like turning a switch. The money switch. Maybe the bowl of milk switch to a kitty. Now its hugs and kisses at the bar; hand on dick at the bar; lick my neck at the bar. I fed her in the CR, but to be fair being drained; weed; hash; sunroof and green day made the 47 mile drive home pass in seconds.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
8 years ago
PLs are the cat people of the sex world. Escort johns are dog people :)
avatar for Eve
Eve
8 years ago
That and cats definitely don't cozy up to other cats on a first meet basis. Get in their space too soon and they'll show their disapproval. But with time and constant exposure, they'll be sure to start playing, nuzzling, and licking each other to everyone else's viewing pleasure.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought of strippers this way.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
8 years ago
I'm trying to continue the metaphor by finding examples of cats making poor life choices, but it's slim pickin's.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
8 years ago
Well okay, maybe they do make some poor life choices http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj227…
avatar for MrDeuce
MrDeuce
8 years ago
The OP and jackslash's response crack me up -- because every time my ATF asks me for more money, she says she doesn't want to be a stray cat. She knows about "veritable shit storm of chaos" girl, who really *is* a stray cat -- I fed her once and she never left :) I tell my ATF that she's a relatively stable pussycat, as strippers go.
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
8 years ago
the girl i encountered at hong kong at 4am was most definitely a cat.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
8 years ago
Less, like cats. Actually very similar to my Christian Eating Lions.

SJG
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