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Advice for the ski bum

rickthelion

Straight outta tha NC, comin' atcha with an AK ready to steal your daughter. ROAR!!!

You are clearly impressed with yourself despite knowing little of the ways of the world. I am highly suspicious of your assertions that you actually practice law among the hairless apes. However it is no concern of mine for I obey only the law of the jungle. I am a lion and I am a rick.

My advice to you is to try to gain some perspective on your life. Purchase a good suit. Not one of those cheap Burlington affairs you no doubt wear. I'm talking about a nice suit. Perhaps a Brioni. Have the tailor sew Velcro onto the back. Then adhere yourself to a wall with your penis hanging out. I know it won't be as large as the barnacles or attractively covered in spines like mine. But it will do.

Then you should think like a barnacle. Nay, become a barnacle. That will put your life in perspective.

ROAR!