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Poor timing

gawker
Older than dirt
I have an old favorite I've been seeing OTC for years. She's not my ATF but is a more occasional drug user and recently got out of court ordered rehab. I hadn't seen her in over a month & was pleased when she texted that she was house sitting, needed food & cigarettes, was lonely and would love to see me. I drove an hour, bought butts & food and got there just when I said I would. She had sweats commando and looked really good.
We sat to catch up & the doorbell rang & it was her mother, come to pick her up for a family gathering the next day. I left & drove an hour home two days later I got a text at 3:00 am that her mom had a bad wreck, washed flights to a trauma center, was on life support in icu.
The next day she texted again a need for food & cigs. I went right over & 10 minutes after I arrived with cigs & cash, her uncle showed up to drive her to see her mom. I left & drove home.
After a couple of days we started texting & I accused her of using me for cigs & money and then kicking me out. She went ballistic, called me a fucking useless old man, unfeeling, oblivious to her mom almost dying, ignoring that she is "in recovery", etc. I told her to fuck off, don't call me again, and get a life.
This morning she texted about midnight wanting to see me.
1. Was my timing bad?
2. Should I see her again ( she does a good (not great) BBBJCIM)?
3. If I see her should I be apologetic or expect an apology?
4. Her mother is 41, she's 26, and I'm 70. The mother really likes me. Should I offer to bring her to the hospital to see mom?
I have very mixed feelings about this one.

17 comments

Latest

chessmaster
•
8 years ago
Sounds like your being used. I say fuck her.
grand1511
•
8 years ago
Sounds like it's all quid and no quo in this quid pro quo situation. Unless you like making long drives with bags of cigs and food, I would stop.
mmdv26
•
8 years ago
So mom was 15 when dancer was hatched, and you're older than the two of them put together...oh, sorry I thought it was a common core math test. Too many fish in the sea to keep this up, but I'm curious, what's mom look like?
warhawks
•
8 years ago

Once again, Gawker's stripper stories never cease to amaze even us veterans of strip club stripper shit...
clubdude
•
8 years ago
Dude you should move on. I think she's has you hooked! You have to break away from her!
Timex345
•
8 years ago
I would move on. I was in a similar situation about three years ago. A dancer was using me for money.
I changed my number and never looked back. No matter how much money I gave her, it was never enough.
I hate her and learned a valuable lesson.
Lone_Wolf
•
8 years ago
If not for the harsh exchange of words, I would have given her one more chance but would have been very specific on expectations. Now, she might just be fucking with you to see how much she can manipulate you.
shadowcat
•
8 years ago
I think that you need a new clock.
Cashman1234
•
8 years ago
I think you are being used. I think it depends on the tone of her texts. If there was an implication of come over with what I need - and I'll make it worth your efforts - then you should be annoyed.

She's going through a difficult time - as you've mentioned. However, that doesn't give her the right to use you. If you were friends (and not OTC P2P) - that's much different.
Mate27
•
8 years ago
When isn't she going through a difficult time? With these type of people they are literally addicted to drama in their life, so they're always creating crazy fucked up scenarios, with the exception of her mother getting in a car wreck, that was unavoidable.

White knights are also addicted to drama, too, feeding into the cycle of dependency. People do what they're going to do, whether it's self destruction or finding healthier alternatives. Whichever route you take, enjoy in moderation.
twentyfive
•
8 years ago
"White knights are also addicted to drama, too, feeding into the cycle of dependency"
Meat, that statement is the most profound statement I have heard, on this subject, Subraman that should be in the aphorisms for sure
vincemichaels
•
8 years ago
Gawker, you know the answer. Move on.
Mate27
•
8 years ago
^^^ Thanks Twentyfive! Apparently SJGuy thinks I'm just a creepy ass troll like himself spamming up the TUSCL board, and now I've earned the title "Ignore" which I proudly display for all as I laugh mockingly.

I can't help myself to engage in a board to someone as clueless as he, but I digress with self-edification.
Cashman1234
•
8 years ago
Meat72 - you hit both nails on the head. There are many strippers who attract drama by their own actions. By the same token - there seems to be a long line of white knights waiting for drama to strike.
seaboardrr
•
8 years ago
You could offer to take her to see her mother. Ask her what hospital she's in so you can send a card/flowers once she's out of ICU. Since you know her mom apparently she shouldn't even balk at the offer. Other than that you need to cut the cord and move on.
s88
•
8 years ago
Being friends with your girl's mom is better than being the BF of your girl. I impress the mom, and mom pressures the girl to be with me even when the girl gets moody and pissed off because Im not a jailbird looser and mom sees a decent son-in-law. Perhaps mom even thinks that I am hot even if she doesnt want to admit it.
pensionking
•
8 years ago
Instead of bringing over cigs and food, go over empty handed. Have sex and then offer to take her shopping for cigs and food.

Always get yours first!

You know you are good for it and you now know she is not.
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