MILF sex

avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
layin low but staying high
I had my first MILF sex. It was extremely mediocre, basically no better than with my ex-wife. In some ways the old ball and chain was actually a little bit better. Sex with every stripper has been far better. And I'm not mainly talking about looks. My MILF has a very attractive body with great tits, face was marginal though. I'm talking about initiative, creativity, fun, etc. She was very passive and not even remotely like what I'm used to with much younger girls.

This was my concern. My impression, supported by this experience, is that 45-55 yo women are weak and unimaginative in bed. Am I wrong? Do I just need to keep looking? For those who fuck women over 45, what do you guys usually do with MILFS sexually? We just fucked and she pretty much just layed there.

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avatar for shailynn
shailynn
9 years ago
Not all MILFs are passive like that, you just got a dud.

I used to see a MILF that would do ANYTHING I wanted. Her only drawback was anal sex, but if I insisted I know she would have let me (but that's not my thing).
avatar for K
K
9 years ago
Ymmv applies even now. Did you expect her to do all the work? Did you provide any guidance? Most of the women over 30 I've had experience with were very good . Some were duds. Give her another chance but this time take charge and give direction. She just lays there, flip her over. Put your dick near her mouth tell her what to do. She will either continue to be lame or she will get into it .
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
I've been dating for 6 years or so, and would say that I agree with the general spirit of what you're saying, but I think you're doing the reverse of what you do with strippers -- you're over-romanticizing the strippers and under-appreciating the MILFs, to some extent, perhaps (or maybe you're not, maybe you just got one bad MILF).

I think I'd summarize my experiences as:
- MILFs are faster to jump into bed, and may be quicker to experiment, than a REGULAR GIRL in her '20s.
- But strippers are not regular girls, they are more beautiful and they are crazier in bed (at least for money).

And in response to an earlier question of yours: YES, I think consorting wiith strippers ruins you a bit for real relationships, at this age. If I hadn't consorted with strippers, my general experience with MILFs would be pretty exciting -- I'd be comparing sex with my 40-something-year-old ex, who hasn't been exciting to me for some time, with a revved-up MILF. Instead, I compare that MILF to strippers who are Waves and Whoas on my crowdsourced rating scale (lol! Gotta throw that in), and those strippers are doing fucking crazy things with me...
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
9 years ago
John, if you met my ex-girlfriend Mary Ann. I think your jaw would drop. She is simply stunningly beautiful. A natural red head, quite spirited and a great experience in bed. I miss that woman, I hope she's doing well whereever she is. It's a pity that your experience wasn't better, but this happens.
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
9 years ago
Eh, JS is less than a year removed fromantic his divorce. Although he should fuck milfs, he really doesn't need a monogamous relationship right now.

Personally, I've found there's a big difference between girls who came of age before and after easily accessed streaming porn, with the cutoff being birthdays around 1981-2. Those who grew up watching porn know the "script" and it normalized certain behaviors. Those who grew up before are far more likely to have developed their own notion of what is "normal" in bed.

There are older gems of course. And there are duds of any age.

JS69, I'd consider giving her one more shot. Sometimes sex the first time is awkward. If she felt uncomfortable she may not have fully let loose and enjoyed herself.

Also, ask for what you want. If she slams on the brakes it's one thing. But civvy girls worry about coming across as token slutty, something sex workers don't have to worry about.
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
9 years ago
I've had both ends of the spectrum. My First girlfriend after my divorce was a freak and she was older than me. My next two girlfriends were much more timid. They were younger than me. I think you just got a dud or she may need to get comfortable with you before she shows her true freak.
I'd probably give her another chance and if it doesn't get any better than this time I'd move on.
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
9 years ago
I've had girls that pretty much just lay there younger than 45.
avatar for gawker
gawker
9 years ago
I think JamesSD nailed the issue. Those who grew up seeing porn have a better idea of what men fantasize about. Just take fellatio as an example: all the young chicks I've been with don't bat an eyelash about sucking my dick with some viewing it as an act in and of itself. The few older women I've been with see it as an unpleasant part of foreplay if they'll go down on me at all.
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
9 years ago
^that's a good point. I hear "I don't give head." a lot less often now.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
9 years ago
Stick w/ the pros and forget the amateurs
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
9 years ago
Could be she sees herself as wife material and wants to send the impression that she's a good girl. The ones who fuck you like they'll never see you again are less inhibited, so maybe she figures on a relationship built on respect and won't show her slutty side.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
9 years ago
w/ strippers/providers; one gets used to immediate gratification and getting what they want w/o having to work for it (for the most-part).

w/ civvies it’s often different and one has to often invest time to often get inconsistent pussy/freakiness.

At the old saying goes – “men use love to get sex; women use sex to get love” – IMO most women are looking for a relationship and not just to bang every, or the first guy, they meet – not saying there are not women like this; but in general; IMO.

If all one wants is to fuck and one has the mean$ to get the kind of pussy they want fairly frequently; then I think trying to mess around with civvies; particularly somewhat homey older civvies; is probably a diminishing-returns game.

Just my opinion.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
Hmmm... to some extent, I think there's some confusion between cause and effect here.

IMO, the difference in attitudes absolutely does not START with porn, it starts with kids who came of age during the AIDS crisis, and whose reactions to both that and other societal memes subsequently led to movements like straight edge. These and other trends led to less emphasis on vaginal sex ... but kids are not going to NOT have sex, so that in turn led to far more emphasis on blowjobs and even anal sex, for reasons having little to do with porn. There's a reason kids starting widely adopting anal-sex-specific terms (e.g., tossing salad) around the time they did -- everything but vaginal sex became far more popular, and they needed terms to describe them. That's also why some of us old guys think touching a girl's asshole with his finger is some kind of radical crazy act, whereas most women in their '20s practically expect a guy to try to stick his tongue in there, there's an organic difference in the way oral and anal sexual activities are viewed and have been experienced.

I do think porn of course has an influence here, but I also think the change in views towards sex came first, and porn reflected and amplified that, and to some extent it's one big positive feedback loop. We as mongers -- and old ones at that -- tend to view everything through the lense of the things we've experienced and understand (that is, porn) and minimize everything we didn't (that is, big trends that effected the way sex was viewed by kids coming into sexual maturity in the '90s and later).
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
9 years ago
John, did you perform your studly duties and make her cum?
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
9 years ago
This is a pretty cool discussion regarding both the sexualization of women of specific eras - and JS69 and his difficulty with his recent milf experience.

I think JS69 may have either found a dud - or he may not have used the proper method to unleash the inner desires of his milf. I think it can take a bit of prodding to bring out the sexuality of some milfs.

The experiences JS69 has had with sex workers could have played a role in his approach. Once you get a milf aroused - many will be incredible lovers - and it requires a strong, self assured, confident man to do that. There can be a fine line regarding some behaviors.

I think Subraman offers excellent insight regarding specific influences effecting the sexual acceptances of various practices on various ages of women. I will think more about this and see how my experiences relate.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
Thanks for the input. Some really good insights in there.

This was very disappointing because I went thru dating about a dozen milfs to get this one, she's got a very good body, and she's into me. But she was very very self conscious about me seeing her body naked which after living with strippers is fucking bizarre. It's also strange because she has a good body and almost DS tits.

I'll probably try it again. I'm sure I made some mistakes, and it was awkward, although I'm not too optimistic about this one. Whether I keep playing with other milfs is an open question.
avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
9 years ago
Congrats...your in high school again
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
9 years ago
I think my one little sentence was the most insightful. Rock a girl's world and you will have an enthusiastic partner
avatar for jester214
jester214
9 years ago
First off, I've never fucked a woman that old.

That said, I've fucked plenty of women of all ages that were shy and boring in bed. It just depends on the woman though I'd be a little surprised if a MILF in her late 40's didn't have some hangups about her body. Especially if she's a divorcee.

I also doubt many women will hold up when compared to a smoking hot 20 year old stripper.
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
9 years ago
Yeah, if it's body insecurity holding her back she may get better.

Sometimes you have to fib a little. I mean, she hasaid great tits, so you can praise them without dwelling on her flaws. Every person has good and less good parts of their body. But yeah, make her feel like the sexiest woman in the world and she might actually like it.

You're right that strippers are unnaturally comfortable with their own naked bodies.
avatar for Tiburon
Tiburon
9 years ago
you should try cougars. They are WILD in the sack....I mean if you can get a cougar being tha your an older gentleman.
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
9 years ago
Women in general have body hangups. Many strippers do too. James has the right idea in that you should make sure you highlight the parts of her body that turn you on and lie your ass off if she asks you about a part of her body you don't like as well.

You have to win the battle in her mind to get the freak out of her in the bed. Once she's comfortable enough you'll see a what she has to offer.
avatar for ButterMan
ButterMan
9 years ago
I'm 45 myself what the hell would I want with a 45 y.o woman? seriously though I wouldn't know. I always been into somewhat younger women even before I started strip clubbing.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
45 is quite a bit younger than me. I won't even consider a woman who is older than me. And I'm very hesitant with women who are more or less my own age. This one is a few years younger.

I did praise her body once she let me see it. Especially her tits. But despite the fact that I fucked her, I didn't see much. It's a little hard to praise that which you don't clearly see.

I will probably keep trying. But it's a discouraging start.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
I'll give a specific example to illustrate. I was kissing down her stomach towards DATY. DS I and II have helped me get a lot better at DATY. And MILF gently pushes me away. She clearly doesn't want it. WTF? She wasn't having her period and was very "fresh," so there was no reason that I could perceive for this. My wife used to do the same thing though because she didn't want to feel obligated to do the same for me.

So no Mikey, I didnt make her cum cause she didn't want me to do my thing. I just fucked her which wasn't enough.
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
9 years ago
^^^ If only she smoked some weed
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
Great point Mikey. I'm teaching her. So here's the lam. I get her high as fuck, then I pretend she's a DS. The tits will make that easier to imagine.
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
9 years ago
Well shit.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
9 years ago
One question - sorry if I missed the answer in this discussion. Does she know about your stripper habit - and your enjoyment of young hot bodies?

I ask since knowing about your experience with firm young bodies - as that might make a milf self conscious.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
9 years ago
Watch some porn together or take her to a SC (where you are not known of course) - and that may get her cougar-juices going.
avatar for rogertex
rogertex
9 years ago
Enjoyed the discussion.

Odds of having great sex are better with Strippers than Regulars.
Pole Dancing, Table Dancing and General Hustling makes a stripper more likely to be active during sex.
But a stripper may not be as attentive to you or may not be totally into you - that can take a bite out of GFE that a regular may provide.

We can all agree - company of attractive & warm woman in bed (MILF or Stripper) is always better than solo activity. Hustle on !
avatar for Corvus
Corvus
9 years ago
John, I was going to say I didn't have anything new to offer the discussion. A number of responses above are spot on IMO. But then I read she wouldn't let you DATY. I have a very short attraction to women who are not willing to let me spend significant time with DATY.

You may just have found a shy MILF, but if she doesn't come around quickly with allowing DATY I would tell her why you are no longer going to fuck her.

Was she shaved? Full bush? I wonder what her issue is? Shove a finger up her ass while you are DATY and she'll focus on other things instead of her body insecurities.

Good luck and have fun while you can. And don't judge all MILFs by this one. Many are much more receptive in bed.
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
9 years ago
Some women honestly don't like having the Y dined at. Others are just uncomfortable how long a guy has to be there to get them off.

If you really like doing it, just stress that fact.
avatar for bvino
bvino
9 years ago
I told you to turn the lights down so she would not worry about her looks. Sounds like you can't take good advice.
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
9 years ago
Although it's a small sample size, my experience has been that sex with MILFs is far superior to the strippers with whom I've had the pleasure. Of the three MILFs I've known multiple times in the biblical sense, 2 were late 30's early 40's and the other was late 40's when we met. All were very engaged in the process, all multiorgasmic and 2 of them were squirters. Oh and all were swallowers. The OTC strippers I've had were far more timid and restrictive in my encounters with them.

I will say I have yet to meet that elusive DS though so I will keep an open mind.
avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf
9 years ago
Do the other benefits of dating this MILF (eg good convo) make up for the marginal sex?
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
LW, I enjoy her company but the sex has got to get better to make it worth the effort. I'll try at least a couple more times to see if the sex improves.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
9 years ago
I think it just depends on the MILF's persona and lifestyle.

If she is not very good with you, then probably she doesn't fuck much.

Her problem, not yours.

SJG
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
9 years ago
John, Imagine if your MILF were actually a retired stripper? They carry themselves differently, dress differently, and are more likely to keep themselves in good shape. In bed I believe she would have rocked your world.

SJG

HERBIE HANCOCK & MILES DAVIS - WATERMELON MAN - LIVE +QTY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_Fp_0oj…

Herbie Hancock - Jazz Fusion Cantelope Island
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrgP1u5Y…

Duke Ellington - Satin Doll
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrytKuC3…

...And God Created Woman (1956) - Official Trailer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kmqv88jW…

Full Movie, English Subtitles, REALLY GOOD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvIxUM_9…

Brigitte Bardot - trailer Viva Maria - Anarchist protest song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0l0d-Is…

Georges Delerue - Viva Maria - L'Irlandaise
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_UGlKul…

Satin Dolls - Dick Hyman at the Lowrey Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHfj-_GR…

Big Ben Bossa - Dick Hyman at the Lowrey Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwqoXBaS…

Mr. Roboto by Styx, performed on giant '70 Lowrey organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mk7Jkr7F…

Walter Hammel Plays "Alley Cat" On The Lowrey Prestige Organ With Wersi EX-1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGcrezPi…

Mike Reed plays "Mack the Knife" on the Hammond Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEdnV-JI…

Mike Reed plays "House of the Rising Sun" on the Hammond Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqOSowdU…

Barbara Dennerlein on Hammond B3 Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60ut7yIu…

Lori Graves playing Pirates Of The Caribbean on the Lowrey Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9GSSApv…

Dance Of The Sugar Plum Fairy Organ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwDn4stT…
avatar for DoctorPhil
DoctorPhil
9 years ago
@san_jose_guy. imagine if you had ever had actual sex with a real live "willing" girl that you didn't need to sneak through her bedroom window while she was sleeping with your chloroform soaked rag in your hand. wouldn't that have been something...
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
9 years ago
DATY: some have a hang up about things down there:
* Am I clean (enough) down there for him?
* Does he taste or smell anything strange?
* Did I shave enough hair
* Some think it takes too long.
* Feel obligated to reciprocate fellatio

#4 may be just because I suck at it. I can admit it if it turns out that I do suck. Or maybe it's that way for most people DATY. I never really compared notes with others. I just used feedback from the woman.

Most woman I'm with they find they prefer I stimulate their Grafenberg spot (G-spot) with my thumb (make sure nails are trimmed) them stimulate 1 or both breast nipples at the same time. Usually once I make a woman climax that way, they request that each time we have sex. I'm do 1-2 orgasms from sex than 1-2 orgasms on their Grafenberg spot with my thumb plus nipple play. Then are pretty much done and satisfied.

Some day I'll have to have a dancer show me the proper way to DATY. I still think I'm doing it wrong.

My 2¢
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
9 years ago
DATY in the 69 position works good because of being inverted for thumbing :) But I do it in the regular position too.

But I always get the girl started with just a finger, and when it comes to getting my thumb in, I take it real careful. The thumb gives her muscles something to squeeze down on.

I originally read about all of this in a tantra book, and right away I put it into practice and it worked magnificently.

When I am going to be with a woman I always prepare my hands carefully, trimming my nails and then filing them smooth. Doing this filing I find that concrete works well.

SJG

Chaka Khan - The Jazz Channel, Chaka Khan Bet On Jazz (2000)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-udRVkS…
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
9 years ago
SJG, I will attempt to locate this tantra book. Thanks for the tip. With what you wrote, it sounds like the thumb is essential, but I was only doing it halfway (either orally or manually ) but not both. Perhaps that was my error, a 50% effort DATY. No wonder the women did not respond well.
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