Great insight into a strippers mindset

9/8/2015 7:26:48 AM

Phantomgeek brought up a great point on a strippers mindset. Good looks will get a dancer in the door but the mindset is what keeps them coming back. As a dancer you know your working literally for every dollar you can get. We deal constantly with people setting at the rail watching and not tipping. They say times are tough or some other bs excuse. Last time that happened my response was yeah I know and if they were good times for me I wouldn't be showing you my pussy for free. People don't understand it takes a special person to do adult entertainment. When we are young we are told to cross our legs and act like proper ladies and not be promiscuous and then next thing we know were grown and told we'll be fined if we don't take our thongs off. I've seen beautiful girls leave in tears because of what customers have said or done. I've seen management overlook things that should never happen in a club because the club is making money. Not all clubs are like this but girls need to realize before getting into stripping that this shit happens. To a customer your not a decent girl trying to make some cash to pay for school or feed your kids or just make money for yourself, your a ho willing to show every inch of your body for a dollar. That's how they see us most of the time. I'm not discouraging dancing because I love it but your mindset has to be right or your never gonna make it. For all the ladies contemplating dancing make sure your ready. Understand family may turn on you. Guys will date you and leave you looking for one thing. You have to be ready for all of this. Any new dancer that's not some bs troll please ask me about things and I will give an honest opinion about the good and the bad parts of dancing

28 comments

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rockstar666

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9 years ago

Show biz can be a bitch, but it also has unique rewards.

shadowcat

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9 years ago

"While walking along a beach, a man finds a lamp and rubs it off. A genie appears and offers to grant the man one wish.

The man replies, "What about three?"

The genie retorts " Look pal, I'm in a hurry, I've been cooped up in that damn lamp for. . ."

"OK, alright" the guy responds. "Tell you what, I'm tired of paying for airplane tickets to Hawaii. I'd like you to build a bridge from California to Hawaii."

This pisses the genie off. He screams, "Hey, this isn't the movies. Your wish has to be practical." "Do you know the engineering it would take to design that, the materials it would take, you'd have to compensate for plate techtonics, the continental shelf. . ."

"Geez" the guy responds, "Well, I'd really like to understand women."

The genie responds "Did you want two lanes or four?""

GoVikings

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9 years ago

shadow LOL thanks for sharing that.

as far as poledancer's topic:

on the surface, dancing seems easy. hey, all you gotta do is take your clothes off and give lap dances, doesn't take a genius to do that. but i know it's not an easy job. it's unlike most jobs and it's A LOT more personal than most jobs, too.

i club a lot of week-nights and often times it can be slooooow, especially during the summer. so that means dancers are there for 6 hour shifts or longer and often times they still have to get up there and dance, regardless if someone is tipping or not. this happened on one of my last visits in which the club had about 8 customers or so....but only a couple were tipping, me being one of them. so on nights like that, i'd imagine it's hard for dancers to keep a positive mindset and stay motivated.

and yeah like you said, its a hard thing for family and friends to accept and i'm guessing many dancers lose their friends when they chose to strip. so yeah, def need a strong mindset for sure

JohnSmith69

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9 years ago

I despise the assholes in clubs who don't tip, treat dancers like shit, etc. They have made my DS cynical and cut throat, which is not her personality. In any event, PD83 is right. It takes a very confident and self assured young woman to do this successfully.

shailynn

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9 years ago

^^^ I think you mean it takes a dancer with a "cunt" attitude to do well. Further insight to me talking in a previous post about all these hot dancers disappearing from the clubs. They just aren't cut out for this type of life, either they aren't confident enough, can't deal with the competition or other issues inside the club (like staying away from the alcohol, drugs, baby daddy drama etc etc)

metaldude

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9 years ago

Well said Hotstuff

Experimental

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9 years ago

Should I take seriously a dancer whining about being stereotyped as she stereotypes another group?
Nope.

rockstar666

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9 years ago

Society looks down on dancers because their customers are mostly married men.

georgmicrodong

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9 years ago

@shailynn: "I think you mean it takes a dancer with a 'cunt' attitude to do well."

Unless your use of the quoted word is an acronym, or euphemism for something else, I think you're wrong. None of the women I've met who've been truly successful could reasonably be characterized as cunts. Self confident and unwilling to put up with bullshit? Absolutely. But not cunts.

Unless you're one of those people who think "self confident woman" and "cunt" are the same thing, then I *know* you're wrong.

san_jose_guy

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9 years ago

I think most guys greatly underestimate the emotional toll that stripping and sex work takes on women. But, if one can learn to understand that, one will be able to relate to them much better, and generally to get whatever they want.

SJG
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/…

georgebailey

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9 years ago

I'm not disputing any of this. In fact I agree with all of it. This is not a "job" that comes with training and the qualifications include great genetics and a superior people skills, plus a strong intuitive sense for self preservation. There isn't enough time to describe the perfect dancer and there aren't perfect custies, except farmerart and maybe me (ha) on a perfect day. Mutual respect is a good start. But in a bar with semi-naked women and money you make some rules as you go.

bang69

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9 years ago

@ poledancer83. That was well done. As a former floor host I let things slide because the money was coming in. The girls were pissed about all kinds of things. But we both that things like you listed in your post. Always have and always will happen in a gentlemen's club.

Mr_O

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9 years ago

Here's a point. Most any female can get a job in a club. We've all seen many sub 5 dancers. Now reverse the rolls. What would be the chance of some sub 5, or maybe sub 7 or 8 guy getting a job in a male strip club? I would bet near 0%.

JohnSmith69

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9 years ago

I'm gonna send the DS what hot stuff said. She'd really appreciate and understand it.

Unless of course I'm so incredibly pathetic that I made her up.

JohnSmith69

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9 years ago

SJG and Mr O both make sense. That's gotta be some kind of record.

Mistah_Fetti_Morbuxxx

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9 years ago

Damn SJG I for once actually agree with what you said. I can greatly empathize with many dancers because, like them, I grew up around a broken environment. Unlike the dancers though, I've made wise decisions in my life to the extent that I will never have to experience that environment or lifestyle ever again.

SJG you actually makes more sense sometimes when you limit your post to just one or two paragraphs.

gawker

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9 years ago

My ATF has been an "extras" dancer for years. She used to enjoy sex with non-customers, but with most customers she has a routine which puts her mind in another place. She doesn't enjoy it and doesn't want to. Whether she's giving a BJ, a HJ or enemy FS, she just is lending her body, not her feelings, not her mind. It took me quite awhile to understand this. Now after years of this she says she's starting to avoid sex altogether. She has a new SD that she says is very generous and she says she makes him do "all the work". She just lies there while he pounds away. I no longer pay her and only occasionally see her but she's very open about her feelings and her increasing discontent with men in general.
Earlier today I was talking with a no-extras dancer whose been dancing for 16 years. She works 3 shifts a week and averages more than $700 per shift. She is beautiful, entertaining, and very hard working. She says she enjoys sex outside of work as much as ever but will never mix the two. These are the two extremes as I see it.

poledancer83

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9 years ago

Lending your body is actually a really good term. Even for just dancers who only dance we still lend out bodies. I remember having that thought on stage. Its not natural to be naked in a room full of strangers but one day I realized im just doing a job. I've seen fellow dancers come in with high self esteem and grow to have even more through dancing and then ive seen girls with good self esteem turn into what I call naked zombies. just want to get each night over with and hate the job and their life. I remember having a regular for a while that was married told his wife he was working late and any excuse he could think of to come spend money on me. I used to feel guilty and we weren't even sleeping together just watched me at the club and again I had to realize this is his problem.

goldmongerATL

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9 years ago

Sometimes the hardened attitude shows through too much. I once had a stripper ask me "want to go in the back and play rent-a-cunt?" It was actually a buzz kill to hear her refer to VIP that way. Maybe that is how she thinks of it, but damn.

ATACdawg

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9 years ago

"To a customer your not a decent girl trying to make some cash to pay for school or feed your kids or just make money for yourself, your a ho willing to show every inch of your body for a dollar."

I totally agree with you PD. There are two parties involved in any transaction and if that is how a customer thinks about a dancer, why does he think he (oops, or she - sorry, lopaw!) is any better? If that is what they think, why would they consort with and pay them?

Now I have known some dancers that were weasels. But they would have been weasels in any line of work. I have known a lot more who were, and are, nice, honest women doing their level best for themselves and too often, their families as sole support.

san_jose_guy

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9 years ago

Most young women have the looks for a strip club, but it is only a few that are really psychologically and emotionally cut out for it.

Also, I feel that with the self aware dancers, besides refraining from alcohol, drugs, born again Christianity, and psychiatric medication, they also are keenly aware that in our society the neon green elephant in the living room is familial childhood sexual abuse. So they don't support normalcy in any way shape or form. This is why knowing them can be such a trip.

SJG
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/…

Stones, 2015
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQt2xM8E…

Gimme Shelter, ft Grace Potter
https://youtu.be/kQt2xM8EtU0?t=1h12m58s

warhawks

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9 years ago

Other than a couple movies (like Magic Mike), women don't frequent male strip clubs in anywhere near similar numbers that men visit female strip clubs. If women spent money on guy's in strip clubs there would be male strip clubs all over the place. It's supply and demand. The few male strip clubs that are around are mostly visited by the gay community.

Could you imagine if the roles were reversed? If the women paid *US* to go the club????

Only in a parallel universe I suppose....

sharkhunter

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9 years ago

A parallel universe? I think they had that in a tv show called Sliders. One guy had a remote control that looked like a tv remote. Juice just happened to be driving by when the guy turned up the power too much. off they went into multiple universes. in one episode women dominated and tried to pick up guys like a role reversal.

I tend to agree with almost everything in this thread. society in general looks down on both strippers and people visiting the clubs.

twentyfive

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9 years ago

to/ PD83 the way that you put it makes us out to be such bad guys if that is really the usual mind set of a typical stripper makes it seem that they hate us for patronizing them. If you think about it we treat most woman the way they treat us not saying that there aren't any jerks out there but there just as many jerky dancers as jerky PL's.
This type of thinking is why a lot of guys don't tip a bit at the rail cause it seems that a lot of the gals that I know who make reasonable money make it by being fun and flirty not by being bitchy and whiny. After all shit happens in any job where you deal with customers why would it be any different any place where people buy goods and services ? Any good sales person knows how this works doesn't matter one drop what they are selling. there are always unreasonable customers and sales people who earn their customers business usually do pretty well

twentyfive

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9 years ago

one other point lest we forget guys mistreat civvie women at times but most don't same as my point of the above reply

GACA

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9 years ago

^^^ I think your reading comprehension needs work. She never once indicated she hates customers.

alabegonz

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9 years ago

Whooooo Girl, you'd been dancing on Fridays too much. That is what you get when you dance on Fridays.

twentyfive

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9 years ago

to GACA it kind of felt like she was hating on us, maybe its just me, but it felt that way anyway as I was reading the thread. If I'm reading it wrong I'm sure PD83 will correct me eventually and if she does ill accept it with out any problem.

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