tuscl

What turns on a middle aged man?

Saturday, July 25, 2015 4:15 AM
Being a young lady in her early 20's I find myself attracted to older men. I'm having trouble attracting the men I want and was wondering what your opinions might be?

50 comments

  • meggers
    •
    9 years ago
    Sorry. That's not how it works hun. I'm not a nube, just asking for knowledge!
  • shadowcat
    •
    9 years ago
    Every man is different but most of the guys that post on here are mongers that want decent looking girls that do extras.
  • motorhead
    •
    9 years ago
    Before I answer that, you say you are having trouble attracting men that you want. What do you look like? Lots of tattoos, piercings? Blue hair? Most of the middle aged guys on here hate that shit but seems all the 20-somethings have them.
  • knight_errant
    •
    9 years ago
    Where are you looking for these older men? And what age (range) are you talking about?
  • jestrite50
    •
    9 years ago
    I am an older guy who dates girls 18 - 25. What I look for in a girl is first of all good looks; second maturity in how she carries herself in a conversation. Third Sensuality, does she like to make out DFK, does she love to touch and be touched. Is she into oral sex and does she like to receive and give orally. These are the things I look for in a girl. I have only been dating dancers at this point because I find that the Club is the easiest place to start looking for that girl. I have dated dancers for as long as 2 1/2 to 3 years. My current GF is an exdancer.she quit dancing shortly after we started dating because she no longer needed the money she was making there. She has a part time full time job that she uses to supplement what I give her each month. Her hours are flexible so we can get together and have a play date whenever we want. Hope this helps. PM ME WITH QUESTIONS to avoid the trolls. LOL !
  • Tiredtraveler
    •
    9 years ago
    Motorhead has a point. Too many tats and piercings is a turn off. I am attracted to women of all ages, note I said women not girls. I am not looking for a little girl. I am not 'Chester the Molester'. The air headed party teen is a big turn off. If you are looking to have a relationship it is Always a two way street. You need to learn a little about our world ie. old movies, music etc. is order to converse intelligently. Clubbing for me at least is a place to relax and be entertained. If I just wanted to get off there are cheaper ways. I am a late middle aged single male and do you know how many late thirty to late forty year old single (AND SOME NOT EVEN SINGLE) women out there are just looking for Mr. Meal Ticket or just a one night stand. Club is no strings attached way to interact with younger women. I have become friends with some dancers here and there and we had great fun. Do not approach a guy my age and say "wanna dance?" then when the answer is no get PO'ed storm away. Unless you are a 10 you are likely to get a no. Sit down and chat me up first.
  • JamesSD
    •
    9 years ago
    A pretty face, nice tits a good ass. A sense of sexual eagerness and willingness to do anything to please. Sexual confidence.
  • sharkhunter
    •
    9 years ago
    Men are visually attracted. What you wear makes a difference. I might be on the younger side of middle age but I will more often brush away strippers and other females if they approach me at the wrong time. example, I'm walking to a table somewhere or going to tip someone. I've had a few females approach me when I'm thinking about something else. I'd rather get approached while sitting at an empty table. If you walk near and I look at you if I spot you, you got my attention. That's much better than interrupting me when my mind is set to do something else. I occassionally get approached while waiting for a drink at the bar. That has worked a few times but it can make me think she wants to bum a drink off me then leave after a couple minutes and I'm out an extra 10 to 12 for no good reason. Approach a guy when he is alone and looking around. He's either waiting on someone or looking for someone like you.
  • warhawks
    •
    9 years ago
    Everyone of us is different. Some like blondes, some like brunettes, red heads, tall, short, big, skinny, black, white, Latina, Asian. Everyone of us has a "type" we like. Some of us like every type. Some just don't care. But most of us have a type we tend to gravitate to. Personally, myself being middle aged, I like a girl who obviously is visually attractive. I like long hair (don't like short hair at all usually on a girl and don't like different colors/streaks in the hair of red, orange, blue whatever) I tend to like girls in the 5'2 to 5'5 range. (Although I like long legs, but high heels make a girls legs look longer). Don't like tats at all. I'm ok with a couple but do not like "sleeves" or entire backs or legs tatted all up. Also don't like a bunch of piercings. Belly button and ear rings are ok, but nose, tits, eyebrows, etc are a turn off to me. Body wise; I love a tight ass, no belly or at least a proportionate stomach. As far as tits, I like all kinds, but tend to be attracted to B and C cups. Don't like flat cheasted but also don't like huge like DD's. Again, visually proportionate is the key. And all of that doesn't mean shit if the girl is mean, self centered or just not much of a conversationalist. I look for a good person. A bad personality is a huge turn off. Hope that helps. But again, it's just one guys opinion. Others will defiantly have different likes and dislikes.
  • Estafador
    •
    9 years ago
    all of us are either really young (people like me in my 20s) or really old (people like Shadowcat up there in age). Your best bet for a middle aged man is to show dem titties. You'd be surprised how simplistic some men can be, especially if you think their "mature".
  • sharkhunter
    •
    9 years ago
    I guess if middle age is 35 to 58, I'm middle age but most of these things still do not apply to me yet. [view link] probably will by the time I'm Shadowcat's age.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    9 years ago
    Here's how you get the big money from the guys you're after Every guy has the type of girls he's into. You can't help this. You either are or aren't his type. But the good news is that there are guys who are into every type of girl other than fat and ugly. So you just need to find the guys that are into you whatever you look like and focus on them. As others have said guys of the age you want generally don't like tats and piercings. Get rid of what you can, and don't get any more. Keep it natural. Don't get fake anything especially not breasts. Most guys will prefer you as natural as possible. Be fun, charming, funny, and engaging. Be seductive and sexy Subject to what your club allows, be sexually permissive. You won't make a bunch of money doing the minimum of what the club allows. Do the maximum instead. Don't be overly focused on money, and never rip me off. Don't ask for a tip. I know it's all about money for you and I'll pay you a lot if I like you. But I'll move on if you seem focused on money all the time. If you want an experienced guy willing to spend lots of money like me, you must date me outside the club. It's ok that you want to get to know me first, so I can show you that I'm safe, respectful, and generous. But if you try to drag it out longer than necessary I will quickly move on. I spend thousands but I won't do that for an experience that is limited to the club. I want our date to be a full girlfriend experience in every respect. I want to take you to dinner first. I will treat you like a princess. I will pay you generously. But you must play your role. The sex must be awesome and mutual. In 20 years I've only found one dancer who meets this criteria perfectly. She makes more money from me than most dancers make from all of their customers combined.
  • georgmicrodong
    •
    9 years ago
    You scoff as "show us your tits," but in all honesty, the type of woman who isn't too shy or stuck up to show her boobs *is* attractive to a middle aged man. Mind you, boobs won't *keep* our attention, you also gotta have personality, wit, charm and intelligence in some combination that varies for practically every man on the planet, but a sexy attitude that says "Do you like looking at my body? Here, look," is damned attractive.
  • meggers
    •
    9 years ago
    Haha I definitely don't have blue hair! If I HAD to place myself on a 1-10 scale I'd be a 7 MAYBE 8 on a good night lol. Not a ton of tattoos, just a couple. I'm on the petite side with small BUT perky tits. The problem I'm having is that the middle aged men that I attract are not the ones I'm after. I enjoy pleasant conversation with a gentleman who is financially stable, smart, handsome, and overall an interesting person. But the ones I tend to attract are "scraping by", drive shitty cars, and only want to fuck. What I'm asking you is, if there's a man like this out there reading this, where can I find you and how can I grab your attention/peak your interest at least. (Aside from showing you "dem titties"?)
  • twentyfive
    •
    9 years ago
    For me I look for a woman that knows how to be sexy and that is more often a well kept woman in her early thirties, that is not to exclude twenty some girls if they carry themselves well a and aren't looking for a daddy type . A woman that we used to call a broad before that became politically incorrect.JS69 covered most of that but I would add that you need to be fun without being a spoiled brat sometimes the most unexpected guy could turn out to be the one you are looking for. I tend to tip better the girls that don't try to play games, tell me sad stories . You should remember we don't want to get involved with people that cant manage their own lives. BTW show us your tits ;-)
  • twentyfive
    •
    9 years ago
    P.S. I would classify middle age as 40-68
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    9 years ago
    Noob ? [view link] @meggers, you have reviewed a club in Portland. I am assuming that you are a dancer. That club's web site is not built on Xoticspot, but many are. Do you have a profile on Xoticspot? Would you like to show it to us? You might also post it on your TUSCL profile. [view link] Speaking for myself, I like women to dress for sex. It is very easy to pull a girl's clothes off of her. That's no big deal. But what I want is for her to dress and makeup. The part of her outfit that is going to come off is then of course secondary. What is important is what is not going to come off. So that is what I focus on. For me this outranks the more standard ideas about beauty. It's between me and the girl. It's not about what other guys might think of her. And I enjoy engaging with a variety of body shapes, sizes, and colors. It is the girl's otherness which is the most intense turn on. So most important are the high heels, they should be really high and held on by straps so that they stay on. And then there is the makeup. Eye makeup is the most practical. The more dramatic and slutty, the better. Things like thigh high stockings and open finger gloves are great. Garter belts are great, as are boob out open crotch teddies. Again, the best outfits don't need to be taken off. And so actually wearing a bit more is more kinky than wearing less. The more covering and conventional outfits are better for situations where the decorum requires it and where sex is not going to be occurring instantly. So with that in mind, I love the way this first girl has done her eyes. I look at all of her pics to see how high her shoes are. I'd love to spend lots of hours shacked up with her and going round after round, putting my jizim into all three of her openings. I like to pick the girl, not to let her pick me. The more forward and aggressive they are, the better. But I'm still going to orchestrate it so that she can see that I am picking her. When I pick one it is because I would really like to spend the time to get to know her, and then to stay in touch with her. I'm never someone who is just looking for ejaculation services. I like doing photo sessions with girls, usually lingerie modeling, of the sort I have described. I've done some of this, and I plan to be doing a great deal more of it and in many many places. Beyond that, there is the issue of how open and forward the girls are. The more slutty the better. Here Dr. F. writes about TJ's Hong Kong Bar. [view link] And then Worf Poe's Hong Kong Bar Video [view link] I think we should steer it that way here in the US. Many of our strip clubs are really just clip joints, places selling fantasy, or 'extras', but not escort grade GFE-FS. To partake of such places is to be paying your money to exacerbate your own sexual frustration. No good! About the guys you know who have shitty cars, please understand that our world is extremely unfair and unreasonable in the standards it expects people to live up to. These guys may have their personal limitations. But mostly I would just say that our world is unfair. If the people at the bottom start working together, things can be made to change. But heterosexual politics have for so long been a big part of the problem, enforcing a senseless rat race. What underlies so much of it is familial child abuse, leaving people with nothing of a life and no place in this world. Thank you for joining TUSCL and posting. We need more women's voices here. It greatly helps with the quality of the forum discussions. SJG Montrose [view link]
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    9 years ago
    Oops, link I forgot to include: [view link] SJG
  • dtek
    •
    9 years ago
    @meggers I'm smart and financially stable (an engineer). Won't rate myself on the "handsome" scale, but I'm pretty much what you've described you're looking for. I'm not lewd or rude. Based on your one review, I also live in the same city as you and sometimes go to your club. I was at DV8 a few days ago. I struck up conversations with several girls that interested me at the rack. Every one of them disappeared into the dressing room at the end of her stage set and didn't come back out until she was on stage again. The few girls who were sitting with customers appeared to be sitting with regulars or guys who looked like they're the demographic you say you're not looking for (poorly dressed, don't appear to have much money). If you want to meet and hang out with guys like you describe you're going to have to make an effort to get to know the guys you meet to weed out the ones you're not looking for. Be friendly and flirty. Sit and chat and spend some time. Fortunately your club does not play the music at levels that make it impossible for guys my age to carry on a conversation. If the guy you're sitting with turns out not to be what you're looking for and you can't sell him a dance, move on to the next guy and don't look back. If you're serious about wanting to meet a guy like you describe, PM me your dancer name and come in to DV8 when you're there. ;)
  • georgmicrodong
    •
    9 years ago
    (GMD sells his cars, buys a rusted out 86 Camry, gives most of his money to his wife and says): Come to Louisville and call me. Attention already peaked. :)
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    9 years ago
    All dancers struggle with this sometimes. My fav is the hottest young woman I've ever seen and even she complains sometimes that all the guys she attracts are broke loosers. But have you considered whether you're working in the right club? Whether you are in the right city to find the club you need? Some clubs attract guys with limited cash to spend, and others attract those with more money.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    9 years ago
    @dtek, I don't know about this club you are describing, and we can never know what was going on with those girls, what was in their heads at that time. But usually in strip clubs you can learn to orchestrate it so that the girl you select responds to you the way you want. And yes, handing her money is usually a part of this. But it also carries a huge weight with them when they can see that you are selecting her above all others, and not just because she is available. SJG [view link] Montrose [view link]
  • meggers
    •
    9 years ago
    Thank you all very much! I really appreciate all of your advice and opinions. I feel I've actually learned quite a bit more than I expected! I will admit that I dance at Dv8, but I would prefer to keep my anonymity ;)
  • ilbbaicnl
    •
    9 years ago
    Smile and be friendly. At some point say "How about if we go out on a date sometime?" This will work with any guy who is nice, has new thinking regardless of age of body, and is not extremely chickenshit or otherwise troubled. If you like a guy who doesn't fit the above, i. e. has "issues" it gets a lot more complicated. An old mind, regardless of body age, will think a woman who asks him out is only good for stand-off-ish fucking at best or abusive fucking at worst. Please don't settle for a guy like that. If that's what you want, you'll have to flirt hard and hope he gets the idea.
  • dtek
    •
    9 years ago
    @SJG Thanks. DV8 is a middle of the road Portland strip club, neither upscale nor excessively divey. The dancers are mostly pretty good looking. From megger's description of herself I'd guess her looks are typical of the girls who work there. And, yeah, I'm sure I could have gotten more attention from one of the girls if I'd put some more effort into it. But I wasn't really looking to put a lot of effort into getting attention that I'd be paying for on that particular night. Incidently, megger's review is correct about the food there. I had a ribeye that night that was excellent. @meggers No worries about keeping your anonymity. Maybe we'll meet anyway. Maybe we've already met. ;) Good luck finding the man you're looking for. Incidentally, assuming you're one of the girls you mentioned in your review, you've probably already outed yourself to anyone who knows where to find your club's schedule and who's smart enough to look at who's still dancing there.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    9 years ago
    Context – are you talking about meeting these men in your regular life for a possible relationship; or are you taking about attracting them as custies in the club; or both?
  • mark94
    •
    9 years ago
    I assume you are talking about successful, well adjusted, attractive middle aged men. For the most part, these guys have dating options outside strip clubs. Or, they are guys who simply don't want any sort of relationship even in real life (or, are emotionally incapable of it) and use the visits to the SC as an alternative way of connecting. Either way, they are likely in strip clubs for the thrill and lack of commitment. They don't go to the club with an expectation of building any sort of relationship. In fact, just the opposite. They activate their no-relationship force fields before they enter the club. But, if you dance for them regularly, build a mutual attraction, learn about their life, and have a series of normal conversations, it might turn into something more. But, I think a grocery store or coffee shop would be a much better environment to connect with this sort of guy.
  • 4got2wipe
    •
    9 years ago
    "Sorry. That's not how it works hun. I'm not a nube, just asking for knowledge!" Rech was being absolutely sincere! Straight middle-aged men think tits = brilliant! Show us your tits and we'll be turned on! ;)
  • twentyfive
    •
    9 years ago
    P.S.S. remember Sam Walton of Walmart fame drove around in an old Chevy pick up so that should teach you not to be so quick to judge a mans wealth and status
  • DoctorPhil
    •
    9 years ago
    @twentyfive “P.S. I would classify middle age as 40-68” 68? sixty-fucking-eight? news flash for you slick but if you are collecting social security you ain’t middle aged
  • jestrite50
    •
    9 years ago
    @meggers If you weren't so far away I would be willing to sit down and talk with you about the advantages of becoming one of my GFE girls. I have only one solid GFE relationship going right now. I have had up to three going at one time. So there's room for another one or two. It gives you the best of both worlds reality and fantasy. There are probably guys in your area that are seeking GFE.
  • twentyfive
    •
    9 years ago
    to Dr. Phil probably wont start collecting S.S. till age 70 so as to collect the maximum but you probable are young dumb and full of cum
  • twentyfive
    •
    9 years ago
    P.S.S. doctor boy I kind of noticed you are full of comments but you have yet to post any reviews you just went from dumbass to troll
  • rockstar666
    •
    9 years ago
    Meggers: You are very unlikely to find a middle aged businessman in a club that will see you as anything as a sex object, even if you become friends. These types of men don't date dancers except for sex. They have friends and family that they would feel it inappropriate to introduce you to. There are exceptions. I've known a dancer for about 20 years now who has no piercings, no tats, is a solid 8 even at her age, manages her money, doesn't drink or do drugs....if I were in the market, I could marry her. OTOH, I wouldn't marry my flaky ATF in a million years! But she's my ATF because of her sexual attraction and outgoing personality. But keep looking...as I say a lot to dancers, even civis have problems finding "Mr. Right" so you just have to keep at it.
  • Mate27
    •
    9 years ago
    Tell him you're a bad girl and you want to be spanked. In bed.
  • 4got2wipe
    •
    9 years ago
    "Smile and be friendly. At some point say "How about if we go out on a date sometime?" This will work with any guy who is nice, has new thinking regardless of age of body, and is not extremely chickenshit or otherwise troubled. If you like a guy who doesn't fit the above, i. e. has "issues" it gets a lot more complicated. An old mind, regardless of body age, will think a woman who asks him out is only good for stand-off-ish fucking at best or abusive fucking at worst. Please don't settle for a guy like that. If that's what you want, you'll have to flirt hard and hope he gets the idea." Brilliant! That would work for me!
  • meggers
    •
    9 years ago
    I'm absolutely NOT looking for this type of man at the club. Club relationships are usually NSA and extremely short term. I guess I'll have to try the coffee shop or grocery store ;)
  • dtek
    •
    9 years ago
    Oddly, the club is where you're most likely to meet a guy like you describe. Unfortunately you'll have to weed out a lot of duds before you find one like you're describing, but that's true everywhere. I would suggest one of the online dating sites like OKCupid or Zoosk, but whenever I get a message from a girl in her 20's I assume it's some sort of hustle. That may be your biggest hurdle to overcome. If you're who I suspect you are, you're plenty cute and (at least on stage) have a friendly, flirty personality. But most successful middle aged guys, when approached by a 20-something, will think she's more interested in his money than his companionship. I'd ask where you shop for groceries, but that might be creepy. ;)
  • rockstar666
    •
    9 years ago
    I met my current g/f from my love of hunting wild mushrooms. If you have any hobbies, that's a good avenue to meet people.
  • Mr_O
    •
    9 years ago
    Some girl, woman, or whatever posts and you guys are like piranha at feeding time. Funny!
  • dtek
    •
    9 years ago
    Naw. I don't bite unless they like that sort of thing. ;)
  • DoctorPhil
    •
    9 years ago
    @twentyfive “probably wont start collecting S.S. till age 70 so as to collect the maximum” you do realize that you will have to live until you’re almost 90 just to break even with that strategy @twentyfive “you probable are young dumb and full of cum” i wish @twentyfive “…dumbass…” hey i’m not the one here who thinks that 68 is middle aged
  • Dougster
    •
    9 years ago
    Looks like the life expectancy in the U.S. is 78. So that would make 0-26 young, 26-52 middle aged, and 52-78 old. Sorry for the bad news folks.
  • Dougster
    •
    9 years ago
    :-)
  • rockstar666
    •
    9 years ago
    Damn! I'm old!!! LOL
  • twentyfive
    •
    9 years ago
    Doctor boy you have a lot to learn and from the attitude you display I am not going to be the one to school you I wouldn't waste my time . you should change your handle from DoctorPhil to Britannica cause you seem to know everything
  • DoctorPhil
    •
    9 years ago
    alright, alright i’m getting off your lawn already
  • PhantomGeek
    •
    9 years ago
    Meggers, for this old fart, physically what would turn me on about a woman is, well, pretty much anything, shy of piercings, tattoos, and any other unnecessary "enhancements." Five minutes after that, what would keep me interest and possibly turned on would be a sharp mind, a sharp wit, and a sharp tongue (used judiciously, natch).
  • 4got2wipe
    •
    9 years ago
    "Looks like the life expectancy in the U.S. is 78. So that would make 0-26 young, 26-52 middle aged, and 52-78 old. Sorry for the bad news folks." It's more complicated than that! Mean life expectancy is lowered by infant mortality and the higher death rate at younger ages! Once a white male reaches 65 the median lifespan is about 19 years longer! 84 is brilliant! At my age my expected lifespan is to 80.5 years (95% confidence of 53 to 98.5)! Even a 21 year old (who exercises, doesn't smoke, and wears his seatbelt) is expected to live to 80! Plus, I think most people start these periods of times one men become adults. So it is logical to scale things from 20 to 80. So I would say young = 21-40; middle aged = 41-60; old = 61-80! I plan to live to be ancient ( = 81-100 ) because ancient is brilliant! ;) Since people who make it to middle age will die at an older age I think twentyfive's numbers aren't far off! You could certainly justify extending the window to 41-65 or so!
  • 4got2wipe
    •
    9 years ago
    I'm not sure if the joke exclamation points improve or detract from the post above, but the make me laugh, so brilliant! Laughter is good medicine! ;)
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